Now lets talk to some teens
I dare say I have gone off the deep end. Anyway its been done before but Im gonna interview the Arthur Cast and ask them what they think of their portrayals in fanfiction. Since the Arthur fandom is filled with people downing stories, particularly mine for some reason this is my last story. So you can all rejoice.
Leave as many negative reviews as you want. I dont care, the following is Truth about the characters. Including the way I write them, so before you blast me, please try to understand I am mature enough to laugh at myself as well.
Pops some Valium and writes.
A sunny day in Elwood city.
"Wow" I gasped. "This is cool, okay on to the Arthur cast".
Just then A girl with long red hair runs out in high purple heels with her hands on her hips.
"Finally, you're here" She grunted.
"Hey Muffy" I waved.
"Hey nothing" She growled. "You wanna know what I think of my character portrayal?" "or should I say ASSASSINATION?"
I hold my hands up defensively.
"Whoa calm down"
My attempt did not work.
"Um first of all I am always a bitch or spoiled brat" "Secondly, if I am not in love with buster or dating Binky, I am plotting a murder?""MURDER?"
"Whats with my horrible ending in your story?" "Why would someone like me DO such a pathetic thing?"
I cringe. "You mean the one where you end up committing.."
"YES" She spat.
"Oh then there are ones where Fern gets revenge against me" "Am I really such an evil nasty vindictive little snake?"
I shrugged. "Well I don't know" "Some times"
Her face went bright red. "GRRR" "Ill sue you" She went to storm off when Arthur and Buster walked out.
"Oh and another thing she pointed at Arthur" "Why am I in love with him?" "Those are the worst stories of all?"
Arthur folded his arms.
"Hey"
She then stormed inside the halls while Arthur and Buster came to greet me.
"Hey" They smiled.
Then Arthurs smile turned to a frown.
"Uh, I know I am the main character but why am I such a..."
"Weird, psychotic, family man, murderer, murder victim, depressive, gay, not gay, scared of DW, not scared of DW?"
He continued to rant.
"uh, I am also in this love triangle between Sue ellen and Francine" He scratched his head.
"Who is it?" "Who do I end up with?"
I shrugged. "Its ambiguous" I replied.
"You want me with Francine" "Some others want me with Sue ellen" "then I am with Ladonna in one story and Molly..."
"Its worse for me" Buster replied.
"Im a sleaze bag or a stoner" He frowned. "Or dating Muffy, molly, fern, sue ellen, francine, Arthur, george..." "uh, yeah George and me are a thing on this fandom?"
"Well" I interceded" "Who do you like?"
Buster bit his lip.
"uh I don't know" "It depends which author I choose to go with"
"Woah woah what does that mean?" Francine cut in.
"Hey I waved."
She smiled. "Yes hello JC" "I know you like me" "Who doesn't?" (Dont answer that)
She put her arm around Arthur. "Im with Arthur in your stories, Im with Arthur in Mr Freemans story" "There are a few others"
"Other wise" She squinted. "I am a psychopathic bitch in love with Arthur who wants to murder him?" "or he cheats on me and I get killed?" "Or he dumps me for sue ellen or something else to do with Sue ellen" "Oh and lets not forget the lesbian I am supposed to be"
"Now about your conversion stories..." "Im this little stay at home wife who has no goals in life?" "What am I, some perfect housewife with no dreams?"
"Stupid" she growled.
I was perplexed. "I thought you said you liked my.."
Arthur then decided to stop the smoke coming out of Francines ears by changing the subject.
"What about the spanking?"
That made George, Binky, Sue ellen and the rest of the cast appear.
"WHAT?" They chanted.
"Oh..." Francine blushed. Arthur and Buster looked at Muffy and Sue ellen.
"That was the worst." Sue ellen cried.
"The hell I went through"
"Dont worry" I gave her a hug. "They have been taken down."
She wiped her eyes and hugged George.
"So you like my story about you two?" I queried.
They nodded. "Yeah" "We are both cute" "So is Fern" George added.
Sue ellen agreed. "Well I am also gay in some stories with Fern right?"
"Fern is always writing, sleuthing or kissing buster"
Fern held out her hand. "No not always" She quietly said. "I am also anorexic, which is unlike me JC rose, you should know better"
"sorry" I gave her a hug. She was very hugable.
"Its okay." she replied. "I am a ghost in one story, but i liked it" "I do get revenge on Muffy and in some stories I am popular" She cringed
"Why would I want to be popular?"
Then Jenna came out. "Why would I want to be popular?" "I am a lampshade in most stories" "like Alex and Maria and Jack weasel"
"Yeah" I agreed. "Thats not fair."
"We aren't asking for much, just more fanfic time"
"Well, TheUltimatecombo has some stories about you guys"
"okay the chanted, we shall check them out"
"To be honest" Brain interceded. "I do not think you or any other authors Character portrayals of us are of a huge matter to us"
"We are not real, we are merely dots and lines on paper are we not?"
"We are here for entertainment value"
The group agreed.
Molly pushed him out of the way.
"Shut up" She snarled. "I'm the most popular character on the Slums" She sneered.
"The what?" Brain asked.
"Its a forum" Fern added. "Im quite the talk of it too"
"So am I" Francine added. Buster nodded. "Me too"
"I have an appreciation thread" Sue ellen remarked.
George gave me a hug. "Thanks for making a thread for me"
I blushed. "Why you are most welcome" I smiled.
"And ME" Maria Jeered. "Its great"
"Yeah" i replied. "You and Molly are pretty popular there"
Molly rolled her eyes.
"Ah I was talking and I would like to have my own show" "I wanna be an AGENT" she started looking toward the sky off in a dream...
"Ah" I said with a smile.
"I'm writing a story about you"
She gasped. "You are?" "Is it about me as an agent?"
"Better" I replied, "You are a rock star being interviewed for rolling stone, telling your life story"
"Damn" "Well good" "Who else is in it?" "I like to work alone but I need some background characters"
"Oh" I replied. "Buster will be in it and I think Muffy and maybe some others, I am not sure..."
Muffy folded her arms. "Oh I see, buster and me again"
"NO" I said loudly. "You two are not dating"
"Let me guess?" She raised an eye. "Am I evil?"
I bit my lip. "Not evil, just controlling"
Muffy shrugged, "okay controlling I can handle" "But i am not going to be a bitch"
"Well, you will be whatever the writers make you out to be so tough" Binky interrupted.
"Shut up" Muffy growled.
"Hey, why am I fat in most stories OR stupid?" "I date Ladonna or Muffy" "Dont i get to make out with someone else?"
I contemplated this.
"Who?" I asked.
"Well I dont know."
"Oh you are with Emily in a story and you're gay in a bath house"
Buster said.
"What?" "ARGH" Binky growled loudly, fists in the air.
"Oh calm down" Slink said. "I sleep with Muffy" "JC Rose, are you serious?"
"Hey" "I was bored and you have little to no stories" I replied.
"True" he said.
"Ew ew ew ew ew" Muffy spat.
Rattles stormed in.
"Why am I a rapist?" "A racist or a big bad ass idiot?"
"Because you are a big bad ass idiot?" Prunella replied.
"shut up poodle" he replied.
"Why am I so mean JC rose?" Prunella asked. "To francine in that left behind story of yours?"
"Uh..." I didn't know what to say.
"You dont like my crystal ball so im the evil witch?"
"Yes" I replied. "Sorry prunella I dont like you" "others do, you are in tons of stories"
"So what?" She grunted. "You made me a bitch so I am outta here to read stories where I am nice." "Darkangelsnapelover where are you?" she called.
THEN
DW came stomping toward me.
"AH HA" She yelled.
"You need to tell every author on here to make me a sweet kind and innocent little princess" "And when i am a teenager, I shall be prom queen and an humanitarian"
Everyone clutched their stomachs laughing.
"See?" She face palmed. "I am type cast as a bratty little sister who hates Arthur and wants to destroy peoples lives"
"I end up in Jail, or I am mean to Kate" "who is PERFECT in ever single story" "Which i HATE"
Kate ran panting behind her. "That is not true DW"
"You are not always mean" "one or two stories have you helping out people"
Dw rolled her eyes. "Yeah but you are perfect."
"Ha" "But you end up pregnant to buster" She started laughing.
Kate blushed. "I doubt that would actually happen"
Buster shrugged. "Meh" "I'm a lady killer or a raving homosexual so anything is possible in this world"
James, Liam and Emily popped in with the tibbles.
"The Tibbles end up in jail or dead usually" Emily said.
"YEAH" they growl.
"I stepped away from them.
"um..." "I'm not really interested in the preschool stuff sorry guys."
"Those day care stories?" Kate sighed. "The kidnapping stories" "The pal stories"
"Wow" I sighed and slumped against one of the trees.
"I don't know what to say, other than..." "have a wonderful kind of day"
"Cliche" Francine smirked.
Arthur and Francine KISSED and walked away.