Disclaimer/Babbling: As everyone should know, I don't own the A-Team. However, like many others I like to take them out to play now and then. I do own my character "Collins" though. I don't guarantee the accuracy of all my info that I've included related to the Go-Go Birds (Chinook project unofficially named "Guns-A-Go-Go") but I tried to research it a bit also not sure which model the conversion from piston engines to turbine occurred. My story's a bit goofy and it's kind of rough so any suggestions or critiques are always appreciated. I hope you enjoy it!
Chapter 1
It was miserably hot and humid. The air was so thick you felt like you were swimming in it. Staff Sergeant Pat Collins stood with a clipboard in hand examining a Huey when Sergeant Baracus and Colonel Smith drove onto the airfield.
This was one of many runs that Collins had recently been assigned to with Smith's team, if only for the fact that most personnel that were assigned to Smith asked for transfer upon return from their first mission with his team. It was mostly luck of the draw since most teams didn't want to work with Collins either since they thought he was section 8.
"Sergeant, are we set for tonight?" Colonel Smith said as he walked over to where Collins was finishing up pre-op checks on the Huey.
"Do ducks quack Colonel?" Collins replied without looking at the Colonel. Smith smirked slightly as he chewed on the cigar in his mouth.
"Where's the Captain?" Smith asked glancing around and not seeing Murdock in sight.
"The Captain, the Captain, my kingdom for the Captain!" Collins said loudly waving the clipboard around. "Cap, you nappin' in there?" Collins peaked into the cabin of the Huey looking for Murdock.
"Nappin'? You know I can't sleep now that you got me with the space hamsters this mornin'!" Murdock complained as he stepped out of the bird referring to a micro-waved burrito that Collins gave him for breakfast.
"Fair is fair! You put clowns in my coffee yesterday! I still feel a little funny," Collins replied eyeing Murdock suspiciously.
"Man Hannibal that fool's crazy as Murdock!" B.A. Baracus grumbled walking up and stopping beside Smith.
"Clowns in your coffee?" Hannibal asked curiously wondering what the latest neurosis for the flight crew was.
"Everybody knows that Sweet 'n Low is made from clowns! I hate clowns… I especially hate ingesting them," Collins told him making a disgusted face.
"You betta get serious fool or I'll get serious, on yo face!" Sergeant Baracus said moving closer to Collins grabbing his collar.
"Ca..Ca..Captain, Colonel, somebody, I don't wanna die!" Collins squeaked as his feet flailed beneath him when B.A. picked him up.
"Alright, B.A.," Smith said putting a hand on his arm. B.A. dropped Collins to the ground and Collins scurried to the Huey and sat crouched on the floor of the cabin just inside the door. "B.A. does have a point though. I need you both to get your head in the game. This is our last mission before we go back stateside so I want it perfect."
"The maxim 'Nothing but perfection' may be spelled 'Paralysis'," Collins said off-handedly, quoting Winston Churchill.
"I'll paralyze yo ass!" B.A. growled.
"Now now big guy," Murdock said patting B.A. shoulder with a smile. B.A. gave Murdock a 'get your hand off me' glance to which Murdock put his hand down and shrugged giving a sheepish smirk.
"Well, let's just say failure is not an option then," Smith said looking at them all, just as he was saying this Lieutenant Peck strolled up.
"Collins, did B.A. choke you again?" Peck asked with a smirk noticing the young man in his usual protective crouched position that he always assumed after having been captured by B.A..
"You're just in time Face! They're all against me. The walls are closing in…" Collins said shifting his eyes from side to side.
"You mean they're melting… I swear kid, you gotta get a handle on your verbs," Murdock said in a teasing tone.
"Thanks for the support," Collins huffed rolling his eyes and pulling his hat down low. "Besides, how many times have we been given the song and dance of 'this is your last mission' anyways?" Collins unfolded himself and stood back up looking at the Colonel.
"Sorry kid, all we can do is what we can do," Smith replied in a thoughtful sort of tone.
"How Zen of you Colonel… Well, it really doesn't matter to me anyways," Collins said. They all looked at him curiously waiting for him to continue. "I'll bet you a dollar to a hole in a donut they put me up in a psych ward after this is over. Think I wanna spend the rest of my days at a VA hospital? I feel like Lee Quai Quat. At least he only had tigers to deal with. I got VC or shrinks…"
"Hey buddy, don't be so glum. We can be roommates!" Murdock replied with a smile.
"Alright, let's get down to business. Face, is everything set for the briefing?" Colonel Smith asked turning to Lieutenant Peck.
"Of course Hannibal," Peck replied flashing a confident smile.
"Good. Let's go guys. We've still got work to do," Smith said waving a hand for them to follow. They all fell in and followed after the colonel. They got into their vehicles and headed toward the base. Hannibal and B.A. were in a Jeep, Face riding alone in a sedan and Collins and Murdock taking up the rear in an old yellow GMC pickup.
"So, you really think you'll end up in a psych ward huh?" Murdock asked curiously now that the two were alone. The two were like brothers, Murdock was the only one Collins trusted complete.
"Where should I start? The clowns, space hamsters, or your dog Billy? Or better yet my friendly conversations with the tigers out here," Collins asked.
"You make a good point… Remember that one time? I thought B.A. was gonna shit a brick when you walked up to that tiger," Murdock said bursting into laughter.
"The tiger told me he was on our side. Dunno why B.A. has such a hard time believing me," Collins said smirking.
In the Jeep, B.A. had been going on about having the two nuts in a vehicle together alone. He still couldn't believe those two, he could never tell if it was some kind of act or if they were seriously off their rockers.
"Don't worry B.A., you know they're the best pilots in this hole," Hannibal told him.
"I dunno, seems Collins might snap someday," B.A. remarked.
"The only snapping that would happen would be his neck with the way you're always choking the poor kid," Hannibal said in a mildly chastising tone. B.A. giggled a bit and gave a mischievous smile. "Besides, the kid's been through a lot and stuck it out. I've got faith in him."
B.A. gave a conceding nod to Hannibal's point. It was true. With all that the team as a whole had been through it was amazing that they weren't all looney tunes. There was a great deal of horror seen on the tours in 'Nam… B.A. shook it off, not wanting to recall images of the past.
Peck was happily alone in the sedan as he sang along to Frank Sinatra's "Luck Be a Lady" that was on the radio. He felt confident that this would indeed be their last mission in that Hanoi pit of hell. He was ready for palm trees, busty blonds and sleek fast cars. Granted the song had more Vegas flair, but he didn't care, you have to be lucky any where you go.
Ready for LA, that was where he planned to go after they were sent back state side. He made a promise to himself that when he got back he'd get himself a corvette and find a hot little lady to cruise with. With that a smile plastered itself to his face and he drove on.
Once they all got to the base they followed in after Hannibal and went directly to the room that the Lieutenant had set up for them in advance. Folding chairs surrounded an old worn table and a map was tacked to a board at the head of the table with various routes and points of entry and exit marked over it. B.A. sat down in a chair near the head of the table, Face sat next to him, Collins elected to sit Indian style on the table and Murdock pulled his chair off to the side away from the table. Hannibal stood next to the map and began going over the mission plan.
"So, I'd like to open the floor to the pilots. Since you two know this area and could fly it in your sleep what is the best route?" Hannibal asked looking at Collins and Murdock. Collins put out his hand motioning for Murdock to go ahead.
"Honestly it's a hard ride either way. You go up the coast and you're out in the open. You go tree skimmin' and the ground troops might have anti aircraft missiles. I like the idea of going through the trees better though. Based on what you said Hannibal there's not many people privy to the op, so it's probably safer so at least we'll just take on enemy fire and not friendly," Murdock said. He then looked over to Collins waiting to see what he would say. Everyone else's eyes followed to look at Collins.
"Hey, I'm just a chauffeur. Whatever you guys wanna do is fine by me," Collins said shrugging. "Through the jungle, over the ocean, don't matter. Maybe I can pick up a tiger some place." He grinned glancing at B.A..
"You crazy fool!" B.A. yelled glaring at Collins who quickly scooted off the table and out of reach. "I don't wanna see no tigers!"
"Killjoy…" Collin mumbled with a sigh.
"Alright, so we're in agreement then, through the jungle and no furry passengers," Hannibal said clapping his hands to get their attention back on track. "We will need to do some heavy moving on this mission. Collins you will be flying the hook. Murdock you'll have the slick."
"Aw man! Why do I get the Shithook?" Collins mumbled.
"Sorry buddy, one of the few times I'll pull rank. Besides, much as you hate it you fly that fat lady like she's a Cobra and live to tell about it," Murdock said. Collins smiled at the compliment and gave a nod.
"Excellent, the plan is coming together nicely," Hannibal grinned extending a hand to Face who promptly gave him a new cigar.
"This is the easy part Hannibal," Face said in a wary tone.
"It's all the easy part with proper planning Face. Don't get your panties in a knot," Hannibal joked with a smile.
"Oh don't smile at me like that. That's not even a real smile! It's just a bunch of teeth messing with my mind," Face said shaking his head. "Just how are we going to 'sneak' a Chinook up there anyways? It's not exactly quiet."
"Don't worry Face. I learned a few tricks when I was assigned to the 228th ASHB. Since we've got a few hours and free reign for fire power I could probably give our girl a 'Go-Go' make-over. If I can get a little help," Collins replied with a smile and gave a hopeful glance to B.A..
"OK crazy man, but you betta not pull any stunts," B.A. agreed cautiously, sometimes it seemed like Collins was worse than Murdock.
"Stunts? A good action flick isn't anything unless there's amazing stunts! Isn't that right Mr. Producer?" Collins replied turning his grinning glance to Hannibal but not allowing for an answer. "Alright now, picture this…"
"You gonna be picturin' my fist in yo face fool!" B.A. said standing from the table.
"Excellent! That's it! Get that rage going!" Collins said as he quickly went out the door as he waved for B.A. to follow him. "Now, to the Batcave!" the boisterous voice echoed from the hall and an off-key rendition of the Batman theme song could be heard.
"You sure he's not related to you?" Face asked Murdock with a laugh.
"They say anything's possible Faceman," Murdock replied.
"Do either of you have a feeling that it might be a bad idea to leave those two alone together?" Face asked curiously with some concern for Collins' safety.
"Eh, that big mud sucker is a teddy bear. He won't kill Collins," Murdock told him with a smirk. "I could go down with them though if you're that worried."
"It actually might not be a bad idea to go down there. Many hands make light work," Hannibal said bringing his cigar to his mouth. With that they all walked out to find that B.A. and Collins hadn't even left yet.
"You ain't drivin'!" B.A. yelled.
"C'mon, pretty please? With whip cream and donuts on top?" Collins asked.
"Get in the Jeep sucka! Or I'll tie you in!" B.A. growled.
"Let's not be hasty now B.A.," Collins said putting up his hand to reveal that he had the keys to the Jeep.
"How the hell?" B.A.'s voice took on confusion knowing the keys had been in his pocket. "You little thief!"
"I don't know what you're talking about. I just found these in my pocket when I left the room!" Collins said smiling while revealing two more sets which went to the sedan and the pickup. "These little suckers just jump in my pockets. Or maybe the gnomes put them there."
"How does he always do that?" Face asked Hannibal curiously.
"Clearly you're not the only one talented at 'procuring' things," Hannibal replied with a laugh. "Collins, keys please."
"You have your choice sir. Pick a color, any color," Collins replied.
"I'm feeling blue today sergeant," Hannibal told him speaking of the sedan.
"Terribly sorry to hear that colonel! I hope this can cheer you up," Collins said as he tossed the keys for the sedan to Hannibal.
"Gimme those keys fool," B.A. growled grabbing the Jeep keys roughly. Collins gave a sheepish smile.
"So are we havin' a party or somethin'? Why are you guys comin'?" Collins asked Hannibal.
"We figured it'd be best if you lived to make the mission," Face said as he got in the passenger seat of the Jeep.
"You lucky they lookin' out fo' yo crazy fool ass," B.A. told Collins while he was getting into the Jeep.
"Time to get to work, get a move on it Collins," Hannibal said as he got into the car. Collins nodded and jogged over to the truck where Murdock sat in the driver's seat. Collins tossed the keys to Murdock and hopped into the bed of the truck hitting the roof a couple times. Murdock started up the truck and began to drive.
"What're you doin' out there? I took a shower this morning," Murdock yelled out the window.
"Cab's getting smaller, I need to be in the air soon," Collins replied.
"Roger that. Good thing you're gettin' the hook then huh?" Murdock joked.
"Yeah, fabulous. We're bringing extra fluid for her right?" Collins asked.
"Don't tell me she's leaking…" Murdock said sarcastically.
"Hell if she weren't that's when I'd be scared," Collins replied with a laugh. They pulled up to the Chinook and Collins jumped out of the truck. "I'll bring her over to the hangar."
"Meet ya there," Murdock said with a wave as he pulled away and drove toward the hangar.
Collins got into the Chinook and slowly brought her to life. The whistle of the turbines began to mingle with the sound of the rotor blades beating the air into submission. It wasn't really necessary to fly her to the hangar since he could have just taxied it over but he'd been on edge the whole day so any excuse for air time worked.
The rest of the team was busily gathering everything that they would need for the conversion that Collins suggested. B.A. was getting all the mountings to weld on while Face and Murdock got the weapons that would be mounted. Hannibal was watching Collins from the hangar door.
"What's that fool doin'? We ain't got all day!" B.A. mumbled before lighting his torch.
"Hopefully he'll decide to join the party sometime soon," Face agreed looking to Murdock for confirmation.
"I'm not his keeper, don't look at me!" Murdock replied with a shrug.
"Apparently he's having a bit of fun," Hannibal mused as he watched the Chinook coming toward the hangar backwards. B.A. walked over and his eyes widened at the sight of the helicopter coming at speed in reverse.
"Shit Hannibal! That boy is crazy!" B.A. said with clear shock in his voice.
"Well then I suggest we get out of his way," Hannibal laughed as they moved back. Collins slowed once he got closer and whipped the craft back around to face forward, setting it down in the middle of the cavernous hangar then shutting it down.
"Whew, we're in for some fun. She's no Easy Money but I think we can make this work," Collins said as he got out.
"Easy Money?" Face asked curiously.
"Yeah, that was our girl that stayed at the 228th for a while," Collins replied. "Last I heard she's supposed to be taking a vacation now at the depot in Harrisburg Pennsylvania."
"Stalking the lady huh Collins? I knew you loved the big girls," Murdock said with a grin.
"I like the way they sing," Collins replied with a smirk and burst into song,
Un bel dì, vedremo
levarsi un
fil di fumo sull'estremo
confin del mare.
E poi la nave
appare.
Poi la nave bianca
entra nel porto, romba il suo
saluto.
Vedi? È venuto!
Murdock joined in on the song knowingly,
Io non gli scendo incontro. Io
no. Mi metto
là sul ciglio del colle e aspetto, e aspetto
gran
tempo e non mi pesa,
la lunga attesa.
E... uscito dalla folla
cittadina
un uomo, un picciol punto
s'avvia per la collina.
Chi
sarà? chi sarà?
E come sarà giunto
che dirà? che
dirà?
Chiamerà Butterfly dalla lontana.
"Crazy fools! What the hell is that jibba jabba?" B.A. yelled impatiently.
"Madama Butterfly! How could you not recognize the sweet sound?" Murdock replied in his best Italian accent.
"The only sound that's about to happen here is my fist and yo face. They gonna make some beautiful music together!" B.A. growled.
"Play nice kids. There's no time for opera today," Hannibal said corralling them back to work. They quickly got back to their duties. A flurry of activities surrounded the Chinook as they started assembling the mounts onto it.
"So colonel, exactly how much weight am I gonna have on the way back?" Collins asked glancing uncertainly at Hannibal.
"How much can you give me? Murdock can carry a little but you'll have the bulk," Hannibal replied.
"Well, if my calculations are correct I'd say we can fit seven thousand pounds in after all this is done. I'd get a grand more running the coast but I don't wanna get bit in the ass by sharks," Collins said.
"Wait, what is Murdock carrying?" Murdock asked curiously walking over to them.
"Looks like you might have to haul a bit of my luggage depending on what these guys come out with," Collins replied.
"She can't fit it all?" Murdock puzzled and then nodded realizing the new weight. They detailed further who would be carrying what cargo from Hanoi. Neither pilot caring what it was so long as it was under the max take-off weight.
After the long afternoon of modifying Collins' Chinook they took a break for dinner. There was a fridge in the hangar that was packed with burgers for the overnight crews. Hannibal walked out to the grill behind the building throwing some charcoal on and starting the fire while Face brought the burgers out to cook.
When they sat down to eat, Colonel Morrison's car pulled up. They all stood waiting for him to enter. When he did they all saluted and he told them to be seated.
"So boys, ready for the mission?" the Colonel asked as he sat with them. They all nodded in response. "Good, this is the last one. This should tie things up nicely. After all, if the VC don't have money, how will they run their army?" The edges of his lips curled into a wide smile.
"Should be beautiful," Hannibal replied with a smirk of his own.
"I see old habits die hard huh Collins?" Morrison said looking over at the Chinook.
"Leaving her as she was would've been like taking a knife to a gun fight. Granted, a really big knife but a knife none-the-less…" Collins replied with a laugh.
"It looks like you boys are ready then. I leave it to you. Good luck!" he said confidently as he stood. They stood saluting Colonel Morrison and he left.
They finished their food and sat quietly for a while. It was a contemplative and slightly heavy silence. If this was indeed the end, what would any of them do when they got back? They all kept up on the news and knew that a lot of civilians looked unfavorably on the war and it wasn't as though they could just become desk jockeys. This was all they knew. They lived and breathed Army.
"A cabana bar!" Collins yelled randomly.
"Cabana bar?" Face echoed confused.
"Yeah, we could open a cabana bar. I mean, if things work out. I think it'd be cool. B.A. could be our bouncer," Collins said.
"I'll bounce you fool!" B.A. replied.
"See? He's perfect!" Collins said.
"Let's not get ahead of ourselves," Hannibal said checking the time. "Alright, it's about time to mount up." They all went getting prepared for the mission to rob the Bank of Hanoi, hoping that this would end the war.
Chapter 2
Collins sat waiting. He hated waiting, especially alone. They were to maintain radio silence unless there was an emergency so he couldn't talk to anyone. He would have no idea how the team was doing.
He pulled out a pack of cigarettes from his jacket tapping the soft pack and pulling a cigarette out by the filter with his lips. This was the only time on missions that he smoked; patience was never his strong suit. He lit it taking a long drag, the smoke lingered in the damp air when he exhaled.
He looked at his watch again and smiled, it was finally time to go. His flight was to be delayed an hour to give them time to access the bank and have the goods out right when he arrived since his arrival would surely be noticed. He flew low and ran no lights trying to be as discreet as possible and hoping not to attract attention because he could only run the grenade launcher and rockets from where he sat and that would just draw more attention.
It was strangely quiet for the entire flight up. It gave him an uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach. He thought he would at least come up against light ground fire. But there was nothing, apparently for one night the VC actually slept.
He touched down and looked around, right on time. The team was pulling lines of wheeled metal safes up to the Chinook. He put the loading ramp down and kept the Chinook running while they got everything inside. Just as they finished loading everything up Collins saw a light, it was a rocket, headed at Murdock's slick. Murdock jumped out and ran toward the Chinook getting in the cockpit with Collins.
"Shit, everybody get in! We gotta go!" Collins yelled. Just after that the explosion hit.
"Alright sergeant! We're all in, step on it!" Hannibal's voice echoed through the headset.
Collin pulled fast on the controls and they got into the air. He swung the Chinook around ready to head back. Just as he got it around the sound of machine guns filled the air. He picked up more speed and somehow a bullet made it through the window hitting him in his shoulder.
"Damn you fuckers!" Collin yelled with a groan. He swung out circling back and flipping on all his spot lights blinding the enemy momentarily. He launched the grenades and immediately shot off rockets afterward.
"Collins, let's not go on a suicide mission now," Murdock said looking over nervously.
"Fuck them, I'm sick of this bullshit, I'll shove this thing up their little yellow asses!" Collins yelled as he got lower and fired off more rockets. Hannibal came up to the cockpit and saw the blood now running down Collins' arm.
"Murdock, take the controls, we have to get back. Collins you need medical attention!" Hannibal said pulling Collins out of his seat.
"No! I had them! Come on! What the hell!" Collins adrenaline fueled rage fumed. Hannibal was surprised by Collins' strength considering his small frame.
"Son, you're shot. Try not to move so much," Hannibal told him calmly. Face looked over confused and Hannibal signaled him to get a sedative from the medical kit. B.A. went to help Hannibal get Collins' shirt off so they could get to the wound to bandage it. Once B.A. had a good grip on him Hannibal went to get the sedative from Face.
"No way! You're not gonna strip me! I'm fine!" Collins struggled under B.A.'s grip.
"You got no choice Collins, you ain't dyin' on us!" B.A. told him uncertain of if the wound hit an artery. B.A. ripped his shirt open and noticed that he, was actually a she. "Hannibal!"
"Is he hit bad?" Hannibal said coming back to where B.A. was.
"She, isn't in too bad of shape, probably just a lot of blood from the adrenaline of the mission," B.A. said quietly. Hannibal's eyes widened as he looked down at the gauze wrapped chest of Collins.
"Shit! Hell of a time to find out we have a Deborah Samson on our hands…" Hannibal mumbled.
"Who?" B.A. asked curiously.
"She was a soldier in the American Revolution," Collins said as she coughed. She laughed and winced grabbing her shoulder.
"Don't move Collins," B.A. said.
"C'mon big guy, I'll be alright," Collins tried to joke in a voice he had never heard before. It was softer less gravelly. Every breath was a little harder for her, she felt like her shoulder was hit with a sledge hammer that was on fire.
"Sorry to do this Collins," Hannibal said as he stuck the sedative needle in her arm. Before she could get a word out she was out cold.
"Who would of thought… Collins is a woman…" Face said looking on as Hannibal began tending to the wound.
"And all those times… I was chokin' a lady!" B.A. said sullenly.
"Not much of a lady," Face replied trying to lighten the mood.
"Shut up Face," B.A. grumbled.
Murdock sat up front unaware of what had just transpired. He had gotten them out of range of the enemy fire and was nearing the base. He was hoping they made it in time for Collins to see a doctor. The hit looked pretty bad from the view he had. Once he landed he hurried back. He saw Collins on the floor unconscious and the rest of the team surrounding.
"How is he?" Murdock asked getting closer and looking seeing what the rest had already notice. "Holy Hua Mulan…"
"Who?!" B.A. said getting sick of all these strange references.
"Hua Mulan was, well, I dunno if she was real, but she was this Chinese girl that dressed as a man and got into the army. They made a movie out of it in Hong Kong in '64, 'Lady General Hua Mulan'," Murdock replied.
"Well as fun as it is talking about the history of women posing as men, we need to get her to the infirmary," Face said.
"Right, there should be a stretcher stowed around here some place," Murdock told them as he searched around.
"I'll carry her, don't worry about it Murdock," B.A. said hoisting her up in his arms. They all rushed to the yellow pickup. B.A. laid her down in the bed of the truck and Murdock followed after him. Hannibal got in the driver's seat and Face went to the passenger side. B.A. hit the roof letting Hannibal know they were ready and the truck sped off toward the base hospital.
Murdock's mind went a million miles a minute. The guy he thought was like a brother was a woman. He just couldn't believe Collins was actually a girl; he didn't want him to be a girl. It made remembering some conversations a little awkward. Especially comparing notes about the women they liked. Was she making that up, or was she really… What did it matter though? In the end Collins was Collins.
B.A. glanced over at Murdock whose internal struggle was quite apparent on his face. His expressions went from confusion, disbelief, unease and everything in between. In the end Murdock got a calm look on his face. For the first time B.A. could relate to Murdock, he couldn't believe that Collins was a woman either. He was still slightly beating himself up over the times that he'd choked Collins like a rag-doll or hit Collins upside the head. She never cried though, she was as strong as any of them. He had seen a lot of men break under less pressure on missions. She was part of the team even if she drove him nuts more often than not. B.A. looked down at her mumbling, "You crazy fool."
They arrived at the infirmary and ran in together. A young nurse came up and guided them to a bed pulling the curtain closed around the bed. The sounds of agony and discomfort were thick in the air from soldiers who had been wounded far worse than Collins.
"The doctor will be with you soon," she said and walked off beyond the curtain. The team stood around waiting for the doctor. The heavy sound of soldier running through the halls made them all curious. Murdock poked his head beyond the curtain.
"There they are!" one of the soldiers pointed to Murdock.
"Hey guys, it seems like there's a welcoming committee headed our way," Murdock said with slight worry. The curtain flew open to reveal they were now surrounded by MPs, M16s pointed at them.
"Gentlemen, there must be a misunderstanding," Hannibal said stepping forward.
"Don't move! You are all under arrest for the murder of Colonel Morrison and the robbery of the Bank of Hanoi!" an MP yelled.
"What is going on here? We were on assignment from Colonel Morrison," B.A. asked.
"You're all under arrest, you're going to the stockade and once the Staff Sergeant has been patched up he'll be joining you. There is no room for traitors in this Army," the MP General Alexander told them.
"But General…" Face started and was promptly cut off.
"I'd advise you to keep your thought to yourself until trial Lieutenant. Take them away," the General said motioning for the MPs to take them. The team surrendered quietly to the MPs they were surrounded by. They were all certain that any court of law would be able to see how wrong this had all went once they saw the file on the mission from Colonel Morrison.
As they were walked out they looked over to see that Colonel Morrison's office was smoldering. Their hearts sank. So much for the mission file, the building had been reduced to ashes. Their fate was looking bleaker by the minute.
Chapter 3
Collins woke in the infirmary surrounded by MPs. She glanced around completely confused wondering where the team was and what was with all the police. She sat up slightly groggy from the pain killers that the nurse had put into her IV after surgery. Her arm was in a sling and she couldn't really move it.
"General, she's awake," one of the MPs said into a walkie-talkie.
"Good, we should be able to move her to the stockade then," the General's voice returned through the walkie-talkie.
"Stockade? What the hell is going on? I didn't do anything man. You gotta believe me!" she yelled grabbing one of the MPs with her good arm.
"You and the rest of your team are under arrest for the murder of Colonel Morrison," the MP said roughly pulling her hand off his sleeve.
"Are you nuts? How could we have done that? We were out on a mission from him!" she said angrily.
"Save it, you'll get to make your plea in court," the MP replied coldly.
Meanwhile the rest of the team was already in lock-up. B.A. paced back and forth in the cell. Hannibal had tried to get him to calm down but it seemed to be no use. They were all feeling the pressure.
"What're we gonna do Colonel?" Murdock asked Hannibal hopeful that he would have a plan, he always seemed to have a plan.
"I don't know Captain… This time, I really don't know," Hannibal said in a sullen tone.
"I'm sure there has to be back up files that are in another location, you know how the Army is. Everything in triplicate," Face interjected in a hopeful tone.
"We also all know how Morrison felt about paper work," Hannibal said with a sigh. As they thought about it the situation only got worse. There was no flight log on the mission since it was top secret and there were no files on the mission with Morrison's office burnt to the ground. All they had was their word, and the court didn't usually turn on the word of people suspected of murder.
The door to the cell opened and they all looked up to see Collins looking more than a little disheveled. Clearly she had not gone quietly. She shoved the MP with her good arm as she walked into the cell.
"Watch yourself Staff Sergeant. We'll have your charges upped to include resisting arrest," the MP said as he slammed the cell door.
"You watch yourself buddy. The boogey man likes to hide under the bed of guys like you," Collins retorted.
"You alright Collins?" Hannibal asked.
"I don't know Colonel, what the hell is going on? I'm hearing we murdered Colonel Morrison?" Collins replied curiously. "I mean I know I've got some wacky alter egos but murder of our commanding officer was never on my to-do list."
"You and me both," Murdock said.
"It would seem we've been cast in the fall guy role. Err, fall girl as the case may be in your situation," Face told her.
"Guy, girl, whatever. Don't tell me you guys are gonna go all soft on me and tell me to spare myself and let you take the fall and all that bull crap," she said.
"You realize that if we don't get pardoned it's a death sentence," Hannibal told her.
"My dance card is getting more filled by the minute. VC, shrinks, the reaper… Should be an interesting party," Collins replied.
"This is serious fool! Err.. Woman!" B.A. said. In response Collins began to sing,
This is the end Of our
elaborate plans, the end
Beautiful
friend
This is the end
My only friend, the end
Of everything that stands, the end
No
safety or surprise, the end
"This is no time fo' yo crazy songs!" B.A. yelled walking over to Collins and grabbing her collar.
"You're back big man! I missed you too!" Collins replied grinning. B.A. growled and dropped her. "So, what do we do now?"
"We wait… Most likely we're going to be sent state side for trial," Hannibal told her.
"Well I guess in a roundabout way we're going home like Colonel Morrison promised after all," Collins said with a shrug. Everyone gave a heavy sigh, sure they were going back but they would most likely be going back to be met with a firing squad or the electric chair.
The next few days went by very slowly until the team was to be moved. In the mean time Hannibal had been mulling over a plan ever since Face had dejectedly mentioned his longing to go to L.A..
It was a slim chance but if he could make it work then they would be in the clear for a little while. It had been announced that they would all be moved to Ft. Bragg to await their trial. They would only have a few days to attempt an escape.
He factored in that upon their return both Murdock and Collins would most likely be sent to a VA hospital for psychiatric care, but he would need to ensure that they would be placed the Brentwood center in Los Angeles if his plan were to come together. It would be a task making sure that the team didn't get separated let alone making an escape from a maximum security facility.
"Hannibal, you look like you're plotting," Face said quietly as he sat next to him.
"I do have something in mind Face," Hannibal replied with a grin and then began filling him in on the idea.
"That's crazy!" Face told Hannibal after he finished telling him the idea. Collins and Murdock looked over curiously.
"Horning in on our territory Colonel?" Collins asked with a laugh.
"You'll see, the less you know the better at this point sergeant," Hannibal replied.
Chapter 4
They arrived at Ft. Bragg early in the morning accompanied by an excessive amount of MPs. They all went quietly with the exception of Murdock and Collins who were arguing about whether what they saw scampering about the plane they rode in on were gnomes or hobbits.
"They had fuzzy feet! That was definitely a hobbit!" Murdock said.
"Not a chance! Didn't you see the hats? Those were gnome hats!" Collins argued.
"They weren't small enough to be gnomes!" Murdock retorted.
"Maybe they ate their Wheaties!" Collins replied. Murdock gave a sideways glance to Collins as he pondered a moment.
"Would you two shut up already!" an MP yelled shoving them forward.
"Clearly the lieutenant here isn't aware of the severity of this situation," Collins remarked.
"That's sad," Murdock replied.
"Yes, very sad," Collins said.
"I said shut up unless you like the feeling of the butt of a gun against your head," the MP growled.
"Hospitality isn't their strong suit is it?" Collins said curiously and received a swift hit. "Easy there, I'm injured ya know." She said rubbing the back of her head.
They got inside the building where Hannibal, Face and B.A. were sent immediately to lock-up. Murdock and Collins were sent to the other end of the building for psychiatric evaluations. The two sat in a waiting area still cuffed and spoke about various subjects, all of which seemed to annoy the MP that was sent to watch over them.
After a while waiting Murdock was sent in first. It didn't take very long before the doctor returned with Murdock and she signed a form verifying that he was clinically insane and should be sent to a VA hospital for treatments.
"How is it in there Captain?" Collins asked curiously.
"I didn't see any hobbits," he replied.
"Gnomes?" she asked.
"Nope, but there was a blue cat, man did Billy go nuts! You know how he gets," Murdock said with a laugh. Collins laughed as well.
"Get moving, we don't have all day," the MP said roughly as he forced Murdock to sit. Unfortunately being the only one assigned to these two meant he didn't have a chance to get rid of either of them yet.
Collins walked slowly into the office. Murdock sat humming some random tune while he waited. Not too long after Collins went in there was a scream and a loud slap. Murdock stopped humming and looked curiously at the closed door watching it fly open. Collins had a sheepish grin on her face and the doctor looked very flustered. The doctor hurriedly signed a form for Collins to be put into the VA hospital as well.
"So, I take it we won't be going on that moonlit stroll on the beach?" Collins asked the doctor curiously. She glared at Collins and handed the forms to the MP. He glanced down and saw scribbles at the very top mentioning schizophrenia, multiple personality disorder and in big letters underlined gender identity crisis with orders not to house with other women. The list below that went on and when he flipped to Murdock's the list was even longer.
"I see you're as charming as ever Collins," Murdock said with a laugh.
"Apparently I lack subtlety," Collins replied shrugging.
"Move it you two," the MP told them. He led them into the psychiatric housing area which was an open area, beds lined the walls and patients milled about. The hospital ended up having to keep the psychiatric ward in this manner due to suicide rates. He pointed them to two beds at the end telling them to mind themselves. There were guards stationed at all doors monitoring the patients and nurses that came and went.
"Hey Collins!" one of the patients yelled as he waved.
"Clark, what're you doing in this fine establishment?" Collins asked as she walked over.
"I'd ask the same of you. Word is you're not exactly who we thought you were," Clark replied curiously.
"You're right, I'm actually Genghis Khan. I am the punishment of God...If you had not committed great sins, God would not have sent a punishment like me upon you," Collins said loudly looking around at the guards. They glanced at her with curiosity. "Don't you know your history? That's a famous saying of mine!"
"Alright Genghis, I think it's time for some medicine," a nurse said walking up to Collins.
"There is no time for medicine. I have lands to conquer!" Collins replied dramatically.
"There will be plenty of time for that later," the nurse replied softly handing Collins a couple pills and a glass of water.
"Are you sure it's not poison? It smells like ammonia," Collins said.
"Ammonia?" Murdock piped up looking over then jumping onto the bed. "I bet they use it on the floors! That stuff burns through the soles of your shoes!" he yelled then gave a sorrowful look, "and then it burns your feet."
"Captain Murdock, there's no ammonia," the nurse said though it was too late he went jumping from bed to bed. In the commotion Collins put the pills in her pocket and dropped the glass on the floor.
"LOCK DOWN!" a guard yelled chasing after Murdock. Collins went over to her bed during the distraction pulling the sheet and tearing a small hole in the mattress cloth shoving the pills into it then putting the sheet back. All of the patients were corralled to their beds.
"There will be no TV time tonight for anyone due to this outburst," a guard said angrily and was met with a few sad whines.
Meanwhile Hannibal was further cooking up his escape plan. Since Murdock and Collins didn't end up in the cell with them it was safe to assume they remained in the psychiatric ward. He devised a plan and told B.A. and Face what he was thinking. If they waited until late night there would only be two guards in their area and if one of them could fain illness they could ambush the guards, then take their clothes and pretend their third man was a prisoner they were moving.
"I don't like this Hannibal," B.A. said in an uneasy tone.
"It'll be a cake walk, trust me B.A.," Hannibal said smirking.
"Just like the last mission?" Face replied in a doubting tone.
"Have a little faith guys. Besides, you want to go to LA right Face?" Hannibal asked still grinning.
"Hopefully it won't be in a body bag," Face replied shaking his head.
It was decided that Hannibal would be the one to fake the illness. Once the shift change was made he began coughing and complaining about feeling sick. After a while the guards came up at first telling Hannibal to keep it down. He then proceeded to shake and cough and fall to the floor. The guard quickly went in calling for the second man on duty to come help.
The first guard knelt close to Hannibal checking his vitals then Hannibal punched him knocking him out. Just as the second guard got in B.A. hit him hard in the back of the head knocking him unconscious as well. With that Face and Hannibal took the uniforms and placed the guards on the beds covering them with blankets knowing they would at most have only a couple hours before the two would wake.
"Why do I gotta be the prisoner?" B.A. complained.
"We didn't have a costume available in your size B.A.," Hannibal replied. "Let's move out."
Face and Hannibal were on either side of B.A. as they went through the prison going to the psychiatric wing. B.A. groaned knowing that they were trying to pull an angle of him being crazy so they could get to the psychiatric records room to ensure Murdock and Collins made it to LA.
"What's going on here?" a nurse asked walking up to them.
"You see, this guy had a breakdown, we can't have some looney screaming all night it's driving all the prisoners nuts," Face said shoving B.A. slight who growled and started randomly yelling.
"Oh…" the nurse looked at them slightly suspiciously.
"I called the major, he's aware of the move. We just needed to file his records," Face told her then gave a soft smile. "I would really appreciate it if you could help us out here." The nurse blushed slightly giving a nod.
"Well if the Major approved it then I'll go ready a bed for him. The records room is down the hall to the right," she told them.
"Thanks so much," Face replied with a smile. The nurse walked off to prep a bed and they hurried down the hall to the records room.
"B.A., watch the door," Hannibal said as he started looking for the file cabinets that contained Murdock and Collins files. After a few minutes they found the files and doctored the transfer sheets to send the two to Brentwood Medical Center.
"We gonna run out of time Hannibal," B.A. said.
"All set, now we have to figure out a way to let them know about the plan," Hannibal said.
"They can figure it fo' themself! We got no time for the jazz!" B.A. told him.
"Don't worry so much B.A.," Hannibal said with a grin. B.A. just shook his head knowing this meant it would be a long night.
They walked out and back to where the nurse's station was. She let them know a bed was ready and she could take the patient in.
"We'd rather do that ourselves, I'd hate to see a pretty lady like yourself get hurt by a brute like this," Face said. The nurse blushed again nodding and showing them to the door. The guards had been made aware of the transfer by the nurse so there were no questions asked. The nurse pointed them to a bed at the far end, as they walked closer they noticed it was next to Murdock.
"Captain," Hannibal whispered as they were pretending to put B.A. in the bed. Murdock nodded for him to go ahead. Hannibal quickly summed up what the plan was for him and told him to inform Collins. Just as Hannibal was finishing up a guard came over to them.
"Is there a problem here?" the guard asked. Hannibal tapped B.A. and B.A. then began to act as though he were sick.
"We need to get this man to the infirmary," Hannibal said dramatically. The guard looked at him curiously.
"He seemed fine a minute ago," the guard said with suspicion clear in his voice.
"Well he's not now. Do you want the rest of these people to catch whatever this is?" Hannibal said firmly as B.A. coughed spitting onto the guards shoe.
"Alright, get him out of here," the guard said looking in disgust at his shoe. They hurried out and began to make their escape.
"That was some great acting B.A.! I'm so proud," Hannibal said with a smile.
"Can we just get outta here?" B.A. told him. Hannibal nodded, their time was growing short.
They had made it out of the doors and Face found a truck for them to use. As they got to the gate an MP stopped them. He pointed his flashlight in the cab of the truck asking what they were doing.
"Prisoner transport," Face replied.
"I don't have any release or transfer requests for tonight," the MP said eyeing them suspiciously.
"Top secret transfer. This was ordered by the Pentagon. It's an urgent matter," Face replied as he felt his heart sinking into his stomach knowing the MP wasn't buying it.
"Nothing passes this gate without the proper documentation. I'm calling this in," the MP said and walked over picking up the phone in the guard house.
"Step on it Face!" Hannibal yelled. Face put the truck in gear and rammed through the gate taking off down the road.
"What now Hannibal? They're going to be on us quick," Face said pushing the gas pedal to the floor.
"We ditch the truck and make our way to LA," Hannibal replied confidently. They drove south headed toward Fayetteville. "Stop here." Hannibal said as they came up on an old farm house.
They quietly broke into the house and luckily for them no one was home. They found clothes to change into and rummaged around looking for keys to an Impala that sat in front of the house. Face found them and victorious held them up.
"Let's go, ain't no time to waste!" B.A. said as he took the keys out of Face's hand. With that they began their drive across the country to L.A. they kept a low profile stopping as little as possible changing vehicles a few times along the way.