I'm a Cocktease
A Twilight Teasing Story Contest
Title: Going Down?
Rating: M
Pairing: Edward and Bella
All – Human
For more information, please see contest details on ninapolitan's profile
E:
While I was flattered to receive your email via the online dating service, I believe there has been some kind of mix up. My dear, meddling friend placed my profile online without my knowledge. I am terribly sorry for the mix up. I wish you the best of luck in your search.
B
With a resigned sigh, I clicked on the send button. While this "E" person had sent a perfectly cordial first email, I simply wasn't interested in finding love through the internet. I had a hard time believing in that sort of thing, and I had been beyond furious with Rosalie when she'd finally owned up to signing me up. She claimed I was in a rut, and that this would be a perfectly safe and fun way to get out of it. Well, just because she and her girlfriend, Alice, were having more sex than I would have thought humanly possible, didn't mean I was in a rut. And there was nothing safe about internet dating! I mean, there have been Lifetime movies about the kind of perverts that prey on poor, unsuspecting, naïve women.
There was nothing wrong with being single. There was nothing wrong with the fact that I'd been single ever since I graduated from college … 6 years ago. I didn't need a man in my life. I was complete. I didn't need a man's approval to feel good about myself. At least, that's what I told myself every day. I'd had my fair share of typical relationships through college, and I'd learned from them. It had taken years, but I'd finally come to terms with my body, accepting it and learning to love it. While I still thought my brown hair and brown eyes was rather boring, they were quite possibly the things I loved most. While Rosalie had her stunning blonde hair and model looks, and Alice had her spiky black hair and bohemian look, I was just Bella, and I couldn't be happier.
So with one final glance in the mirror, I grabbed my purse and coat and went about starting my day. With a smile, I pressed the call button for the elevator, taking in a deep breath to prepare myself for the best part of my day. If I were really lucky, he would be in there waiting for me. And by he, I meant the tall, handsome, mysterious man that owned the penthouse in my apartment building. Sigh. He was the epitome of sex. Bronze hair, strong, defined jaw line; lean, fit musculature; and that smell … sigh. Sometimes, if I was running late and I'd missed him, I could still smell him in the elevator.
But I'd never seen his eyes. They were always buried in a newspaper or behind sunglasses. Sometimes I thought I could feel them on me, but mostly I figured that was my imagination. Men like him simply didn't notice women like me. I understood the laws of the dating jungle; he was a lion while I was more on the lamb end of the spectrum. I was okay with that, especially because there was nothing that said that this little lamb couldn't admire the striking lion from a safe distance. But really, who was I kidding? I'd let that lion devour me in a heartbeat.
~*~
B,
I am sorry if my email made you feel uncomfortable in any way. I, too, have some meddling friends to blame for our interaction. However, if there is any truth in the information I've received thus far, I would not be opposed to pursuing a friendship even if it is only in writing. I will acquiesce to your response, of course.
I wish to assure you that I am not in any way a nefarious character. While my friends may accuse me of being a bit of a recluse, I would simply argue that I take great pleasure in relaxing with a book and some music rather than being forced to mingle at a club or bar. My work is very demanding, so when I am away from it, I crave the quiet.
I suppose the likelihood of getting a response from you is slim to none. I recognize that would be the rational response to getting an unexpected email from a complete stranger. But on the off chance that you would be willing to take a chance on this stranger, I will be here, checking my inbox.
E
I had to close my eyes as I clicked the send button. I felt so ridiculous resorting to something as pitiable as seeking out friendship through the internet. The fact of the matter was that I simply did not have time to pursue social relationships outside of work. There was also the fact that Emmett, my large and overbearing older brother, never gave me a choice in the matter. Thankfully he understood my need to remain anonymous, and didn't post my picture. I didn't need the women in my office to get any ideas. They made me uncomfortable enough as it was.
I would not consider myself to be vain, but I had always been aware of the fact that women found me attractive. Honestly, though, I found my apparent good looks to be more of a curse than a blessing. I'd been burned. It took me a long time to realize that not all women were like that, like Tanya. Perhaps that was why I didn't put up more of a fight when Emmett signed me up for this thing. It would actually be the perfect way to get to know someone, and know that if it turned into something more it was because she liked me for who I was, and not what I looked like.
But then again, I needed her to respond to my email first. I didn't know what it was about her profile, but I'd felt the need to contact her. Perhaps it was the brown hair and brown eyes that pulled me in, much like hers. The woman, the siren, that I did my best to share an elevator ride with as often as possible. She had luscious mahogany hair that always smelled of strawberries, and I'd once caught a glimpse of the deepest brown eyes I'd ever seen. I was barely one step above a stalker in the way I longed for my mystery woman. Everything about her called to me, and yet I couldn't do more than just steal glances of her when I was convinced she wouldn't notice. Every time I approached the 6th floor, I held my breath, hoping that the elevator would stop for her.
Today had been a particularly difficult day at work, and as I walked up to the apartment building, calling for the elevator, I realized the only thing I wanted in this world was to have her be there, waiting for me. Even if it would only be for those few, short, blissful moments in the elevator, it would have been enough. Never mind that what I really wanted was to wrap her up in my arms and take her up to my place and ravish her until I couldn't see straight.
Sadly, though, she wasn't there. But it was probably for the best, because I didn't think I would have been able to restrain myself if she had been there. And I knew that she wouldn't appreciate a complete stranger assaulting her in the elevator, just like I was sure I didn't want to deal with her boyfriend when he found out.
The ride to my penthouse was a slow, lonely one. I went through the motions, settling in for another quiet evening. But when I went to check my email, I felt the corners of my mouth turning up in an unexpected smile.
~*~
E,
Nefarious? Who uses words like 'nefarious' anymore? I must admit that my curiosity is piqued. Perhaps that is why I find myself replying to you.
I can say that the information my meddling friends posted is accurate. I do have brown hair and brown eyes. I do work as an editor for a local publishing company, but in the interest of anonymity, I won't say which one. I am single, but independent.
One thing that isn't mentioned on my profile, though, is that I have been known to take a chance or two on a stranger, and so far things have worked out nicely. I suppose that comes from working in the publishing business; you learn to take chances and go with your gut.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that I would not be opposed to pursuing a friendship with you, even if we never meet. I am of the firm belief that there is no such thing as too many friends. And who cares if some of those friends live in another country, or only communicate via email? A friend is a friend.
As an act of good faith, I wish to assure you that I am not a nefarious character either. I, too, will continue to check my inbox in the hopes that you have found time in your day to drop me a line.
B
I don't think I'll ever truly know what it was that made me reply to his email. Maybe Alice was right. Maybe I was lonely. Besides, if I was reading between the lines properly, he sounded just as lonely as I felt. I'd meant every word of my reply. I did have a good feeling about him. There were too many similarities to ignore; his comfort in books, in music and discomfort in clubs were definitely things I understood. Yes, I had a good feeling about him. I had a good feeling about us.
~*~
B,
I can't remember the last time anyone has commented on my word choice. It was … refreshing. But I suppose I should come to expect more comments along those lines, given your profession.
Without sounding too terribly cheesy, I cannot tell you just how pleased I was to receive your reply. I will admit that true friends have been difficult to find in my life, and I am looking forward to building a friendship with you.
I am glad your meddling friends had the decency to post accurate information about you. Much to my friend's dismay, my information is correct as well. I would describe my eyes as green, but I've yet to come up with a proper color description for my hair, as it is somewhere between red and brown.
As for finding time to 'drop you a line,' I am more afraid of flooding your inbox with unwanted email. You see, my curiosity is piqued as well, and I cannot wait to get to know you.
E
~*~
E,
Sorry, but when you use words like 'acquiesce' and 'dismay,' there is no way to avoid sounding cheesy. It's okay, though. I'll let it slide. But you are correct, it is a bit of an occupational hazard that I notice those sorts of details. Speaking of occupational hazards, you never did tell me what you do for a living. You do have a job, don't you?
B
I felt bad for such a short email, but I was running even more late that usual. After pressing the send button, I shut down my computer and resumed my mad, tornado-like dash through my apartment in my effort to get dressed and caffeinated. As I waited for the elevator, I allowed myself to remember the reason why I was so late this morning, and I felt the heat of my blush on my cheeks as some of the highlights from my dream resurfaced. Naturally, of course, that was when the elevator arrived and opened up to reveal Mr. Lion, which only made my blush spread from my cheeks down to my neck.
But there was something different about him today. It took me the better part of three floors to realize that he was smiling, and he wasn't reading a newspaper. I still couldn't see his eyes from my vantage point, but I could see the way the side of his mouth was turned up in what was very clearly a crooked smile. I found it hard to believe that this was the first time I'd ever seen him smile, but as I searched my memory I couldn't remember any other times I'd seen him look … happy. But before I could think any more about it, the elevator made its final 'ding,' and it was time for us to go our separate ways.
~*~
B,
I can't remember the last time I've laughed so hard that early in the morning. Thank you. Yes, I do have a job. I own a music production company. I've spent the better part of my adult life working to put this company together, and things have finally begun to fall into place.
And thank you for tolerating my cheesiness. Not many would, so I consider it a testament to your outstanding character. Now if only I could get my brother to be more understanding …
So, tell me about yourself. Tell me about your family. How did you become an editor? Is it something you enjoy? What is your favorite color?
See? I told you. I want to know everything.
E
~*~
And that's how my friendship with E began. Months later, and we'd still never met and no one had been brave enough to bring it up yet. But I was in no hurry to mess with things. Truth was I'd developed a crush on E. My head told me it was crazy to fall for someone who I'd never actually met, someone whose name I didn't know, someone I'd never so much as seen a picture of. But my heart, the same heart that told me to take a chance, had fallen for him. It was hard not to fall for him. Of course, I cheated. My brain had conveniently given E the appearance of Mr. Lion in my fantasies.
Tonight, we were in the elevator and just before the elevator reached my floor, Mr. Lion reached out to push the stop button. His long, strong fingers lingered on the console, as my eyes feasted on the sinuous muscles of his forearms. The sleeves of his button down shirt had been rolled up, and as my eyes scanned up his arm and to his face, green eyes were locked on mine. E.
My heart leapt up into my throat, and I forgot how to breathe as I watched him close the distance between us. Large, warm hands cupped my face just as soft lips brushed against mine.
"I've been waiting for this moment for so long." A voice I'd never heard before, crushed velvet, breathed into my mouth, my eyes still locked on his intense green stare. I hadn't realized I was moving until my back came in contact with a wall. "Please … Bella … I need you."
Who was I to deny him? I let him have me. I let his lips caress mine. I let his strong, knowing hands run over my body. I gave him me because I needed him just as much as he needed me. He was the epitome of everything that I desired; the man whose body I lusted for and the man who had stolen my heart with his words.
I needed air, but I couldn't bear to pull away. And then his lips were on my neck, his fingers pulling my clothes away. I ran my fingers through his hair, imagining its silky texture. I moaned low and long when he closed his mouth over my bra-covered breast, teasing me through the material. I ground my hips against his; drawing out a moan as I purposefully rubbed over what I imagined was a very large, very hard erection.
The best part was when he pushed back against me, causing me to throw my head back and cry out in pleasure. And then a hand began to slide up my thigh, under my skirt. His warm hand latched onto my ass, holding me in place as he continued to grind against me, creating the most wonderful friction. His mouth never left my skin as he continued to devour me, my own arms and hands doing everything they could to pull him closer, to bring us closer.
The alarm on the elevator began to go off, or at least, that's what I thought it was until I remembered that it was only a dream and that the alarm was my clock. My dreams had become increasingly vivid and intense, and my level of sexual frustration was at an all-time high. I kept my eyes closed, determined to see my dream through to the end, to the moment when I could wrap my hand around him, guiding him into me. As my hand worked quickly over the wetness that coated my clit, I let my mind keep me in that elevator trapped between the wall and his body.
My back arched, my head digging into the pillows as I imagined him slamming into me over and over again. I thought of the dark, lust-filled, green eyes that I'd never seen as my body began to quake. I felt myself clench around my fingers repeatedly, and distantly wondered if I would ever be given the opportunity to clench around him.
I congratulated myself on being able to afford an apartment by myself so that I could moan and cry out as loudly as I pleased. It also wouldn't do any good to think too hard about the fact that I just brought myself to orgasm fantasizing about my internet crush and the man I tended to stalk in the elevator.
The question was, however, if I would own up to my crush on E. Was it possible to flirt in an email? There were times where I could have sworn that the banter we often exchanged could have been considered flirting, but then again it was also very easy to convince myself there was something more. I had a very good imagination.
At some point during my shower, I decided that it was time to stop being the meek little lamb. I would be crazy not to turn things up a notch with E and start hinting at the possibility of meeting in real life. While I had no shame in fantasizing about him looking like Mr. Lion, it wouldn't matter what he looked like. My relationship with E, although unconventional, made more sense and felt more right than a lot of things in my life. It was time to get over myself and take the next step.
~*~
E,
Good evening. I hope your day was better than mine. Remember that book I was telling you about? The one that I had to finish because one of my coworkers doesn't know a semi-colon from a colon? Well she came looking for it, expecting it to be done when she just gave it to me two days ago, and blew up at me. Don't worry. I put her in her place. And in the process I learned that the reason she was being so … well … her … was because she hadn't exactly told our boss that she'd passed the book over to me, and our boss was asking her for it.
Now, I know I've mentioned the fact that I have a bit of a temper when properly provoked. Well, poor little Jessica hadn't seen that side of me until today. She had no idea the wrath she had unknowingly just unleashed on herself. Not only did she lie to me, but she lied to our boss and was going to take credit for the work I'd done. Let's just say that she won't be making that mistake ever again.
I have to admit, though, that now that I am 'talking' to you, I feel a million times better. Just knowing that I can vent all of this out and that you'll read it, means so much to me. Of course it helps that I am happily sipping on a nice cup of hot chocolate, but I am convinced it wouldn't be the same without you.
I am about to admit something, and you are under no obligation to respond in any way shape or form. I'm just going to throw this out there because it's been on my mind. Days like today make me wonder what it would be like if we were more than just pen pals. I'll admit that I think about you … a lot, probably more than I should. But like I said, we can pretend that I never said anything. The last thing I want is to let our friendship become awkward.
I probably should delete that last paragraph, but I'll honor that promise we made to each other, to not edit. But I have to tell you – right now it's killing me that I can't delete it.
Moving on and away from awkward … I do sincerely hope that you had a pleasant day. I know things have been stressful for you at work. You should really consider a vacation. You know that thing where you don't go to work for a couple days, and instead go to some exotic location to relax? Yeah, that thing. You should try it some time.
But until then, enjoy the soothing strains of Chopin, because I know he's one of your favorites. If I could, I would treat you to a little back rub. But I guess we'll both have to settle for just some warm, comforting thoughts.
Take care of yourself,
B
I must have read over her email at least a dozen times, and the last four paragraphs twice as much as that. I'd convinced myself that I'd gotten pretty good at reading between her lines, but then she was anything but predictable. I suppose that was one of the things I loved best about her. Every email, every conversation showed me something new. And yet time and time again, she'd prove to me just how well she knew me; like how she'd recommended I listen to my favorite composer. And maybe it was silly, but that was how I knew she was real.
But this … this was something new and … unexpected. The hope and excitement that had been building up in my chest ever since I first read her email were threatening to push my heart out of my chest. I'd long ago fallen for her, but had resigned myself to the fact that we would never be more than just friends. So many times I'd thought about discussing meeting her in person, but I'd never found the courage. I'd come to cherish our friendship, and the last thing I wanted to do was to ruin it.
Sometimes our conversations, emails, felt slightly more than friendly, but I'd always assumed that I was just looking for something where it didn't exist. But if what she said was true, if she had thought of me as something more, then this was my chance. This next email to her could change everything. I was nearly shaking with excited energy, which was surprising considering how exhausted I'd initially felt when I first came home.
So many nights I'd come home, anxiously anticipating hearing from her. And then I'd spend all night dreaming and fantasizing about being with her like I wanted. It may not have been the most honorable thing, but the image I'd formed in my mind was based on of the mystery woman that lived on the 6th floor. Her creamy white skin, her rich brown hair, her deep, dark, chocolate eyes, my B. My mystery women had always been pretty, but lately she'd been different. She'd had a glow about her, and I don't know why, but seeing her that way made me happy.
B was right. Things had been especially stressful at work lately, as we'd been trying to expand our production company, acquire some new artists. If I was being honest with myself, I owed her my sanity. She was my lifeline. No matter how difficult my day had been, knowing that I would come home to one of her emails made everything okay. I knew that once I logged on and saw that I had a message waiting for me, everything would be okay.
Even though I'd never so much as seen a picture of my B, I knew that one way or another, I would find her, and I would make her mine. I would be a fool not to. She was perfect for me. She was quite possibly the smartest woman I've ever known. She could make me laugh like no one else could. She had a fire about her, but also a kind and tender heart. But the thing that stood out to me, the thing that initially drew me in, was that she was a good soul.
I needed her in my life. If I had to, I would settle for this, for only glimpsing her life through our emails. But I had to try. I had to do everything I could to try and bring us together. No matter what happened to us, I needed to know that I'd done everything I could to see this through.
I held my breath as I pressed the send button. I'd never been so bold in my emails, and I was worried about her response. I've been known to spend hours composing an email for B, carefully crafting each phrase to ensure that nothing could be misconstrued, but not this time. This time I tried not to over think things, as I'd so often been accused. Just like she'd given me a small glimpse into her heart in admitting how she thought of me, I'd do the same for her. I let her in.
~*~
B,
Firstly, good morning. I realize this may sound silly, but I truly love starting my day with this email to you. I find it difficult to even remember what my mornings were like before our little morning ritual. I know our relationship isn't exactly conventional, but I want you to know that I consider our relationship more real and vital than any relationship I've had with the people I actually see on a daily basis.
I dreamed about you again last night. Yes. I dream about you. You may wonder why I've neglected to mention this. I guess it all comes down to the fact that I was afraid to scare you away. Thinking of you, writing to you, reading your words, has made my life worth living again. Thinking of your body and all the things I'd love to do to you and with you when we finally meet … those are the fantasies that fill my dreams. Yes. I fantasize about you.
B, please tell me that we can meet soon. I know you are afraid. I know you worry that I will be disappointed in what I see. I have those fears too – or at least I did, but not anymore. I want to see you. I want to touch you. I want to hold onto you and never let you go. I want to kiss you like I've only dreamed. I want to feel your warmth, to savor the reality of your skin pressed against mine. I want you.
Until then …
E
I read over his last email again, the email that I'd still yet to respond to, the email that he'd sent nearly a week ago. I felt horrible. Everything just felt … wrong. I felt like I'd lost my best friend – probably because I had. I couldn't bring myself to write back to him, and I didn't know why.
I'd be lying to myself if I didn't admit that the only thing he'd been guilty of was turning me on. All he'd done was put into writing everything that I'd been thinking and feeling for weeks. And now, now that it was my turn to tell him that I felt the same, I couldn't. It wasn't that I didn't dream about him. It wasn't that I didn't fantasize about him, about us. It wasn't that I didn't want him. Nothing could have been further from the truth.
Maybe it was simply that suddenly it was too real. Now they weren't just my feelings; they were his too. If I messed this up, I wouldn't be the only one to suffer, and I couldn't bear to hurt him. I was stuck in this strange place where I couldn't bring myself to move forward, and there was no place to go back to.
I had to fix this. I had to email him. I had to say something, but I didn't know what.
I was scared. He was right, like he usually was. Things were fine just as they were, and I was scared of ruining the best thing that had happened to me in years.
But I didn't want to be afraid any more. Because when I thought about things, really thought about how my life had changed since that first email, I realized that there was nothing to be afraid of. What was about to happen, what came after this next email, would just be the next step in our relationship. It was time for me to grow up. And for E, I could and would work past the fear. I owed it to him and to myself to at least try.
~*~
E,
I've tried to sit down and write this email all week, and even now I find that for a person whose livelihood is based on words, they continue to allude me. I can only hope that I am not too late, that I haven't hurt you too deeply, and damaged any chance of salvaging some kind of relationship with you.
You were right. I was afraid. I still am. But I've decided that I don't want to be afraid anymore.
All I can do is ask for your forgiveness. And I hope that one day, you would be willing to meet me in real life. However, if I were too late, I would hope that we would find a way to resume our friendship. And because there is still the possibility that I will never hear from you again, I just need to say this …
Even if we never meet, if we never email again, I want you to know that the reason why your last email scared me so much was because everything you said, I felt. Ever since you came into my life, albeit unconventionally, I've had a reason to smile in the morning. Emailing you, seeing that I had a new email waiting for me from you, those are the highlights of my day. No matter what happens next, I want you to know that I don't regret taking a chance. I could never regret you.
Yours,
B
Reading that email, feeling the air return to my lungs after what had been one of the worst weeks of my life, I felt hope surge through me again. It did hurt, though, that she thought that I wouldn't want to see her anymore. Nothing could have been further from the truth. I knew I had taken a risk in being so bold and direct. I knew she would be scared, just like I had been. While I wished it hadn't taken her a week to respond, I couldn't begrudge her that time. I would have waited an eternity if it meant that we could meet. Because in that email, in those last few sentences, she had opened up to me in a way she had never done before. Just like I had done, she'd revealed her true feelings for me, and sweeter words had never been typed.
I made sure to reply quickly and decisively. I didn't want her to spend another moment doubting me. Later, I would sit down and type out Shakespeare's sonnets and verses of poems from all of the greats – maybe I'd even compose a song for her. Now, I just needed her to know that she had no reason to worry. I needed her to know that it was not too late. I needed her to know that she would have to do a lot worse than forgetting to email me for a week.
~*~
B,
When and where?
E
~*~
Everything hurt, but not because I was sad or injured. Every inch of me hurt because my skin was barely holding me together. Today was the day I would meet E, and I'd never been so excited, scared, anxious, happy, and confused in all of my life. We'd agreed to meet at a local coffee spot, which turned out to be only a few short blocks away. I tried not to think about the implications of our meeting spot too much. I tried not to think about the fact that the spot that he'd suggested was so close to my apartment, which could mean that he lived close by. And then that made me wonder if I'd ever run into him before, if our lives had ever crossed paths. I couldn't think about those things because then, the anticipation would most certainly kill me.
We both agreed to keep things casual and remain anonymous in both name and appearance. It seemed to be some unspoken understanding between the two of us that we would simply know each other when we got there. I didn't know what his thoughts were, exactly, but I knew that as soon as I saw his eyes, I would know him.
~*~
This was it. I felt like I was 17 again as I nervously ran my hands through my hair, trying without much luck to tame it into submission. All of the insecurities that I'd pushed aside and ignored were suddenly flooding to the surface, making it difficult to breathe. Out of habit, my hands came up to my collar, only to find that not only was there no tie, but it wasn't even buttoned. I glanced over at the clock again, verifying that it had only been one minute since I'd last checked, and I still had at least 10 minutes to kill before it was safe to head to our meeting spot without getting there ridiculously early.
I had to admit that I was a little shocked and thrilled when B agreed to meet me at my favorite coffee spot. It was only a couple blocks away from the apartment complex, and it had been a long time favorite spot of mine. I reasoned that either she was willing to go far out of her way to meet me, or she lived near by; both possibilities were very promising.
I glanced over at the clock again, only to find that again, only one minute had passed since I last looked. I decided I couldn't wait any longer. I needed to get out of the apartment, or I would drive myself mad with anticipation. I grabbed my keys and sunglasses, stuffing my wallet in my back pocket as I let myself out, resolved to stop by and pick up some flowers with my extra time. As I waited for the elevator, I wondered what kind of flowers B would like best. I thought it best to go simple, knowing that she would most likely appreciate something that came from the heart, rather than something flashy.
I was a little bothered by some of the sounds the elevator made as it began its descent, and I wondered what the odds were that I would plummet to my death before I could even meet the great love of my life. Almost as if it were a sign from above, the elevator stopped … at the sixth floor …
~*~
I tried to remember if the elevator had groaned like that the last time I used it, but all thought ceased when the doors opened, revealing Mr. Lion. As usual, he was sporting sunglasses, only this time he wasn't dressed in a suit for work. Today he was dressed casually in dark wash jeans that hung perfectly on his hips, and a button down shirt that was left untucked. I felt heat rise to my cheeks as I scurried into the elevator as quickly as I could while still appearing normal.
It was odd now, seeing Mr. Lion like this. He kept checking his watch and running a hand through his hair, and it occurred to me that I'd never seen him that nervous before. He always seemed to be so calm and collected. But then that also made me realize that I hadn't seen Mr. Lion in at least a couple weeks. I guess I'd either been late, or he'd been early. Either way, it was … good … to see him again. I'd been so caught up in everything with E that it was only now that I realized that I'd missed my lion.
And then a piercing shriek caused me to bring my hands up and over my ears. The elevator car shuddered violently before finally coming to an abrupt halt, sending me stumbling to the ground butt-first.
"Are you alright?" My breath caught in my throat as I took in the sound of Mr. Lion's voice for the first time. I ducked my chin against my chest, suddenly shy at the smooth sound of his voice.
"Yeah, are you?" I was proud of the way I'd managed to get sound to come out of my mouth, given my current state. But I couldn't look up at him. It was like when I got that email from E, when I freaked out. Something had changed, and somehow everything was more real now that I'd heard his voice. He wasn't just Mr. Lion anymore; he was a real person.
"Fine, but I'll feel better when I figure out what's going on." I looked up in time to watch him reach over to the phone next to the control panel. He paused for a moment before speaking with a perfect Portuguese accent. "Olá. O elevador está preso. Pode dizer-me qual é o problema e quando será arranjado?"
Worried that any sudden movement would be a bad thing, I carefully scooted myself over to lean against the wall. I sat back, oddly calm given the situation, and watched his profile as he continued to talk on the phone. I'd never had the opportunity to look at him so closely for so long before, and I found myself noticing a lot of things.
I noticed that the color of his hair could only be described as a deep copper, but even then the description didn't seem to fit. I noticed the hard line of his jaw and nose as he spoke, and that, judging by the way he was pinching the bridge of his nose, he didn't like whatever the attendant had to tell him.
But mostly I noticed him. Even in the dim light of the one emergency overhead light, I could just make out the hard lines of his body. The way his shirt draped loosely over his frame highlighted his lean musculature, and when he leaned forward to rest his head against his arm, I had a difficult time pulling my eyes away from his perfectly rounded ass.
I watched the muscles in his jaw flex just before he let out a heavy sigh and thanked whomever it was he had been speaking to before he hung up the phone. His shoulders seemed to hunch over in defeat, and I had to repress the urge to jump up and hug him. He looked so … sad.
"So, what's the verdict?" I tried to keep my tone light in hopes of lifting his spirits a little, as well as my own. I didn't even want to think about the fact that I was trapped in an elevator when I was supposed to be meeting E. He had so easily forgiven me for freaking out and not emailing him for a week, but I doubted that the old 'I got stuck in an elevator' excuse would come off as anything short of a lie when I didn't show up at the coffee shop.
He sighed again, and I watched his entire torso move with the weight of what he was about to say. "They're not entirely sure what the problem is at the moment. A crew has been dispatched to assess the situation and hopefully get us out of here as soon as possible."
Slowly, he slumped down to the floor directly across from me, his head falling into his hands. "No one seems to know how long this is going to take, and we've been advised to make ourselves … comfortable."
I wasn't sure what I wanted to do first; cry, laugh, scream, or cry. Why is this happening to me? Why now? Why today? Wasn't it only moments ago that I felt like nothing could stop me? I couldn't bear the thought of E sitting there, waiting for me, and thinking that he'd been stood up. The very idea made my stomach turn, and I couldn't contain my groan.
"Are you sure you feel okay? Do you need something? I can call again." His words came out rushed and full of concern, and then I had to bite back a sob. "I'm sure everything will be fine. We're not in any immediate danger."
I shook my head as I struggled to get a grip on my emotions. His kindness reminded me of E, which then made my chest ache as I thought about how much this would hurt him. I failed miserably to find some good in this situation and resigned myself to fall back on the old adage that everything happens for a reason. I took a couple deep, calming breaths to put an end to my wallowing.
"Thank you, and really, I'm fine." I wiped at my eyes, making sure that any evidence of my emotional breakdown were hidden. "No offense, but this wasn't how I had envisioned my afternoon when I stepped out of my apartment earlier."
"I know what you mean." His voice was low, muffled from where his head had fallen back to his hands, and I had to wonder if I was meant to hear him.
~*~
Of all the times I'd fantasized about this damn elevator, I had to get stuck in it the day I was supposed to meet my B. After all those months, after thinking that I'd lost her forever, and then finally scheduling this time to meet her only to get stuck like this … I had no words. Aside from my own disappointment and longing to see her, I couldn't fathom the pain I was about to put her through by not being there. I would be confirming all of her worst fears, and I knew we wouldn't be able to get past this. Even though it wasn't my fault, I just couldn't fathom her forgiving me for standing her up. And with that thought, I could feel my heart shattering into a million pieces.
As much as I wanted to punch in the walls around me and throw a fit, I couldn't. I wasn't alone. Months ago, before B, if I had been in this position I might have thought it a sign from above that it was time to get over my crush and say something to her. But now, now all I could think about was the pain I was about to cause B. Even with the soothing smell of strawberries and something else, something floral, all I could think about was B. I began composing my apology in my head, ready to beg and grovel as much as one could in an email.
And then my siren, the beautiful woman sitting across from me released a pathetic groan, putting a sound to the way I felt. It was easier to worry about her instead of myself, to reassure her that things would be okay. She wasn't about to be stood up by the man that had promised to never hurt her. She wasn't about to have all of her worst fears about men confirmed.
But as I looked over at her, really looked at her like I'd never allowed myself to before, I finally allowed myself to take in all of the details that truly made her beautiful. As she sat with her knees pulled up to her chin, arms wrapped around her legs, she was resting her head up against the wall with her eyes closed. Her thick, wavy hair was down, hanging loosely over her shoulders and contrasting beautifully with the pale skin of her long neck. Every line, every curve, seemed to be accentuated in the dim light, adding to her ethereal beauty.
At first glance, the features on her face may have looked relaxed, but the worry line in between her eyebrows betrayed her. Like Mona Lisa's mysterious smile, I couldn't help but feel that so much more was going on beneath the surface, that there was a greater story I was missing in her expression. Even though my heart belonged to B, I found myself wanting to unravel the mystery of my siren, and I hated myself a little for that small betrayal.
I couldn't help myself; I looked down at my watch and sighed when I saw that this time, time had moved too quickly. I was supposed to be walking up to the coffee shop right now, walking through the doors, and locking eyes with my B. I was supposed to be having the best day of my life.
~*~
The silence dragged on between us. It wasn't uncomfortable or awkward, but I found that in that silence, there was too much room for my mind to wander. We were both still, the only movement coming from Mr. Lion as he would occasionally glance at his watch. I would have been insulted by his preoccupation if I couldn't completely sympathize with him. I think that was what kept me sane, the knowledge that for better or for worse, we were in this predicament together.
It was odd, though. Now that I'd decided that I wanted to talk to him, I didn't know what to say. That same nervous energy seemed to well up in my throat, keeping me mute as the moments continued to pass by. The other problem I noticed was that the lack of air flow was beginning to make me regret my wardrobe decision. I had anticipated a nice, pleasant afternoon and hoped that our rendezvous would continue into the evening, so I had layered my clothing appropriately.
But now, now that the heat seemed to be closing in around me, I could feel a bead of sweat gathering between my shoulder blades and sliding down my back. I looked up to verify that my lion still looked mostly asleep where he sat across from me, as I gave in and began to shift so that I could remove one layer – my sweater vest. Underneath I still had on my blouse, which was slightly see-through, which is why I also had on a camisole underneath of it.
But neither of those additional layers helped me to feel any less exposed once I'd removed my sweater vest. A new surge of electricity surged through the air, and I felt a chill run down my spine in spite of the pressing heat. I tried my best to ignore it, focusing instead on the fact that my butt had long ago fallen asleep. Still slightly worried about the structural integrity of the elevator, I carefully shifted so that I was now lying on my back, my sweater vest bunched up with my jacket to serve as a pillow.
I sighed and closed my eyes as I let my clasped hands rest on my stomach. It was strange that even with the silence and the lack of movement, I was keenly aware of his presence. The next thing I knew, I'd begun to match my breathing with his. It was comforting. Somewhere in the back of my mind I recognized that I should be freaking out, I should be an emotional mess. But I wasn't. And then almost as if he could hear my thoughts …
"I have to admit, that if I had to be trapped in an elevator with someone, I'm glad it was you."
~*~
Shit! I couldn't believe I'd actually said that out loud!
"I guess I've seen a few too many movies with women screaming inside trapped elevators." I chuckled nervously as I felt beads of sweat build up on my forehead. "And, well, I guess I'm just impressed with how calmly you've handled our situation."
It wasn't exactly a lie. I was impressed, if not slightly alarmed by her calm demeanor. But mostly, I was entranced by her. I felt slightly sick to my stomach as I admitted to myself that I'd been lusting after this woman whom I didn't know at all while I'm trapped in the elevator, when I'm supposed to be meeting the woman who I'd come to think of as my soul mate. What kind of monster was I?
The answer was simple. I was human. I was a man. There was no way I could not notice the swell of her breasts as they rose and fell with each breath. There was no way I could ignore the graceful lines of her neck. And there was no way to stop my brain from thinking about which layer of clothing she would pull off next. And because I was a man, my body had no choice but to react in the only way it knew how. I was hard.
I hadn't been so confused and conflicted about a woman since back in high school when I had a thing for Ms. Stewart. It didn't help things that I hadn't been with a women in … well, too long. I felt like I was cheating on B, but I really had no control over the fact that I was physically attracted to this woman. I just needed to think about something else, anything except for what I wanted to do to her, anything except for what our sweaty bodies would look like as I pinned her to the ground and came inside of her. Not helping.
~*~
I turned my head to glance over at him when he got quiet again. I had to stifle a chuckle as I watched him run his hands through his hair repeatedly, his hair darker now with his perspiration. The other thing I noticed was that it seemed that he was looking at everything and anything that wasn't me. He'd seemed so calm and collected at first, but now … maybe the heat was starting to get to him.
"So," I tried to quickly think of a safe topic of conversation, something to spark a conversation that would last more than two sentences. "How long have you lived here?" I closed my eyes, and turned my head back against the surprisingly plush carpet floor, cursing my lame attempt at conversation.
"About 4 years, almost five. You?" I could have sworn I heard relief in his voice, almost as if he was as grateful for the distraction as I was.
"Just under 3 years." I slowly released a breath of air when the silence between us turned awkward for the first time. I wish I'd worn a skirt. The heat seemed to kick up to a new level suddenly, either that or I was just suddenly aware of the sheet of sweat that coated just about every inch of my skin now.
It was as if now that I'd tried to have a conversation with him, I couldn't let it go – I couldn't go back to the silence.
"I'm Bella, by the way."
"Edward."
My heart skipped a beat when he said his name was Edward, immediately making me think of E. My stupid, traitorous heart then kicked into overdrive at the thought, the delusional thought that Edward could have been my E. There was no way the universe would be kind enough to make my lion and my E the same person. And besides, E could stand for a million different names. There was Eric, Ethan, Evan … Elvis … Okay, so maybe E wasn't the most common first initial, but the chances that I'd lived in the same apartment building as E for three years, shared the same elevator with him nearly every weekday morning, were astronomical. It simply wasn't possible.
~*~
Bella. Beautiful Bella. B.
No. There was no way … just … no.
As much as I wanted to believe that Bella was my B, it just didn't seem possible. There was no way I'd been living in the same apartment building, sharing the same elevator, dreaming and lusting for the same woman that I'd met accidentally online. Besides, there were plenty of female names that started with B. There was Barbara, Beth, Bridget … Bessie … Okay, so maybe not as many as I'd originally thought. But that still didn't get past the fact that the chances of Bella and my B being one in the same were astronomical. It simply wasn't possible. Was it?
"I hope this little incident hasn't completely ruined your day." My heart was up in my throat, making breathing difficult as I waited for her response.
"Oh, well, I was supposed to meet someone, but that's obviously not going to happen."
"Where?" I watched her closely as her body tensed with my abrupt interruption. I would apologize later, but I had to know. I couldn't explain the pulling sensation in my gut, pulling me towards her. I had to know if it was possible.
And then she began to sit up, the smooth curtain of her hair following slowly. And then she turned to face me and our eyes met for the first time. And in that moment I knew … anything was possible.
~*~
I was about to answer him when I sat up, and my eyes locked onto his for the first time. Green. And that's when I realized that I didn't have to tell him where I was going, because he was going there too. Edward … E … he was here, right here in front of me, and had been all along. My lion, Mr. Lion was my E, Edward.
For a long movement neither of us took a breath, and the air was perfectly still around us. And then something snapped. My heart restarted, thumping wildly, erratically as I sucked in uneven gulps of hot, charged air. I could feel the hair on the back of my neck standing up as another chill shot down my spine, the hair of my arm coming to rise as goosebumps broke out all over my skin. I felt my nipples harden against my bra, and a different kind of heat flooded between my thighs.
"E?"
~*~
I didn't think. I reacted. I shot across the elevator and pulled her face to meet mine in a heated kiss. Everything else could come later. This … this kiss … this came first. It was what I needed to get my brain to fully comprehend the fact that my B, Bella was not only real, but she was the woman of my dreams.
I ran my hands through the hair that I'd admired from afar for entirely too long, luxuriating in how it felt to have silk running through my fingers. I delicately ran my fingers over the soft curves of her face and neck, realizing now that nothing I could have imagined would ever compare to how soft her skin truly was.
And then our mouths began to open for each other, hesitant at first, tasting and testing. But when she released a small sigh, I felt my control give in, and my tongue greedily sought out hers. I didn't even try to hold in my moan, as I tasted her for the first time. Her hands slid up from my chest, tracing over my jaw, before her fingers began to run through my hair. If I had been a cat, I would purr. But all I could do was sigh into her mouth.
She began to release her own small sounds of pleasure as my hands began to roam down her back, reveling in the fact that my B was real and in my arms. How many times had I dreamed of this? How many times had I fantasized about what it would finally be like? And still I found that nothing could compare. But then she began to pull away, kissing away my pout.
She smiled wickedly up at me as she reached down, and swiftly pulled her shirt up and over her head. I made a move to reach for the flimsy excuse of clothing keeping her still hidden from me, but her hands stopped me. Before I could ask, her delicate little fingers were tugging at the buttons of my shirt, and then I was helping her. I watched her closely as she ran her eyes over my torso, her hands pushing my shirt down my arms. Her hair hung loosely around her, the ends tickling my skin and driving me wild. And then she kissed me …
~*~
Seeing his body, finally reveling in the hard defined lines of his abs and chest, his skin coated in a fine sheen of sweat … I had to taste him. I used my grip on his shoulders to push him onto his back as I bent down to kiss the base of his neck. The saltiness of his sweat mixed with his natural scent was unlike anything I could have imagined. I moved to hover over him as I spread my kisses across his collarbone, around his neck, and down his sternum. I made sure to run my hands over him, caught up in the feel of his skin, slick with sweat under my palms.
He released a long, low moan when I accidentally brushed up against the bulge underneath my belly, and I made sure to do it again on purpose. I began to trail my body lower, leaving wet, sloppy kisses on his abs as they twitched with my touch. But strong hands gripped onto my hips, stopping me. I rose up slightly on my knees, as I straddled his thighs, and squeaked slightly when his hands roughly pulled my camisole over my head.
His hands then cupped my bra-clad breasts, squeezing and teasing them through the material, all the while smiling up at me. I bent down to kiss him again, to kiss that smile, to be closer to those green eyes, and simply loving the way it felt to have his arms around me. Our sweaty bodies began to rub against each other, and I made it a point to purposefully grind against his erection now, feeling the heat between us rising to an entirely new level.
His large, strong hands latched onto my hips, guiding my movements as I continued to build the friction between us. My hands were planted on either side of his head, as we breathed heavily into each other's mouths.
I could feel his fingers reaching for the clasp of my bra, and just as I reached back to help him, the elevator moved. No, it didn't just move, it shuddered loudly and jerked slightly before beginning its descent to the ground floor, causing me to collapse completely on top of Edward. We both cursed quietly under our breath, as I awkwardly rolled off of him, and began the search for my clothes.
I don't know we managed it, but by the time the final 'ding' sounded, we were both fully clothed, if not slightly disheveled. The doors opened to reveal a small crowd of people, all with worried expressions. A flurry of apologies and queries as to our well being overwhelmed me, and I recoiled into Edward's embrace. I was about to say something, but Edward beat me to it.
Edward took a step back, bringing me with him, and I watched with amusement as his hand reached out to the control panel and long fingers brushed over the last button, the one labeled, "PH."
And then his lips were next to my ear, his breath tickling me. "I don't know about you, but I could use a shower."
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Well???? If I left you unsatisfied, send me a review, and if I get enough, I'll write what happens next – but it won't be posted until voting for Nina's contest is complete, as per her request. Please take the time to read the other entries for her contest and vote.
Many thanks to my beta, Val, for sifting through over 10,000 words and 20 pages worth of foreplay. What would I do without you?
Also, much thanks to Raven for inspiring this one-shot. And thanks to Nina for inspiring this contest.
So please, leave some love.