Needle, Nieces, and Narcotics. That's what Little Boys are Made of

Chapter 1

Today is my 125th birthday. I suppose we are still going to celebrate it. We celebrate every year. I don't know why we continue to celebrate these. Birthdays are supposed to be for celebrating all the accomplishments and strides you have taken that year. I haven't made any strides. I went back to college, again. And I received another degree, but I have not accomplished anything. We should celebrate Carlisle's birthday. He discovered the cure to cancer this year. THAT is something to celebrate. The fact that my continuously unchanging and virtually indestructible body survived another year is not something to celebrate. We should celebrate my brother, Edward's birthday. He has managed to defy all the odds and have a child. He has raised her and taught her and made her into the wonderful, beautiful, young woman she is today. We should celebrate Bella's birthday. She is a mother and a vampire. She risked her life and everything she ever wanted for Renesmee. That is something to celebrate. Life being made is something to celebrate. That's all I've ever wanted. All I've ever wanted is to be able to produce a child with my husband. Emmett and I would be wonderful parents. I truly believe we would. I won't lie; I was almost hoping that Bella wouldn't pull through. I almost wanted her to die giving birth because if she had, Edward would have lost his mind (again) and I would have been able to raise the child. I would have finally been able to have a daughter. Looking back though, I am so glad that Bella did make it. She is the best mother and Edward is the best father that Renesmee could ever ask for. That doesn't stop me from being jealous. Edward knows. He knows it kills me to see Bella with her daughter. He knows that this, not time alone with Emmett, is why we decided to move to London for awhile. He hasn't told anyone and I appreciate it. Edward, more than anyone should be able to understand why it hurts me that Bella was able to have a child and I was not. From the day I woke up with blood red eyes, all I have thought is,

"Can I still have a baby?"

No, no, I cannot. I will never be able to conceive a child. I will never be able to raise a child.

I considered adoption when I was much younger. I knew there were plenty of unwanted children in the world, and hell, I wanted one. I was financially stable. I was more than financially stable thanks to Alice's knack for being able to predict changes in the stock market. I was so enthusiastic about this possibility! I could finally have a baby! I went to Emmett and the rest of the family and told them my idea. They did not cheer and yell and congratulate me for thinking of it. They simply looked at me with pity in their eyes. Carlisle looked at me and said,

"Rosalie, what about when the child is old enough to notice you are not aging? What will you do when your child continues to grow older than you? Your child will die before you, what then?"

Oh.

It felt like all the wind had been knocked out of me and I could no longer breathe. I hadn't considered any of that. Of course I couldn't adopt. I would have to either change my child into the despicable creation I am, or watch her die. I could not do either of those things. I would remain childless. I reacted to this by spending two years away from everyone. I went to all the places in the world I had always wanted to go. I went to France, Spain, Brazil, Australia, and everywhere. It only took Emmett a few months to find me but he did not force me to come back. He stayed with me. From then on I never again mentioned that I wanted a child. I never again voiced my most painful desire.

So today, for my "birthday" I will be going back home to visit my family. They live in New York now. When they return to Forks in about 75 years I am sure I will be living with them again. I just need some time.

Emmett and I had decided to swim back today. We didn't feel like sitting on a plane for that many hours.

"Bet I can beat you to the other side!"

"Just because it's your birthday Rose, doesn't mean I'm gonna let you win," he said with a sly wink.

"Oh like you let me win! Bring it. What's the wager?"

"Hmm…if I win…I get to jump off the Empire State building. I swear I won't get caught! And if you win…We can climb to the top of the Eiffel Tower for that stupid romantic kiss picture you wanted."

"It's not stupid! And you have a deal."

I heard him yelling out behind me, "Are we starting from here or the ocean's…HEY!"

I laughed at him and the wind in my hair. This was something I loved. This feeling of the wind in my hair and the ground moving beneath my feet at paces that humans could never experience without maybe sticking their head out the window of an airplane. I reached the ocean about five minutes ahead of Emmett. I was a faster runner but he was a stronger swimmer. This one was going to be close. After I swam a few miles off the coast, I began to see dolphins! I loved swimming with the dolphins! I dove deeper and tried to play amongst them. Most of them scattered. They could tell that I was a predator. A few brave ones stayed with me for a little, flipping turns. I knew I was losing my lead by every second I stayed there but for a moment I didn't care.

I could feel the water changing behind me and I darted ahead and worked my way back up to the pace I had before. I loved watching the colors change in the water. No humans really know this yet, but if you go deep enough into the water in the dead center of the ocean, the colors are beautiful! There are coral and fish of every different shade of red, orange, pink, and yellow. I didn't have time to stop and look today but Emmett and I had spent hours upon hours down there just looking and wondering.

I could see land now! I knew he was right behind me, but if I could reach land first, I would definitely win! I know I can run faster than him so the twenty mile stretch from land to the house would be a cake walk. My foot hit land underwater and I began running. I was almost completely out of the water and…

"Oh! Hey! No cheating! You can't grab me!" Emmett had me pinned under him on the sand and he was just laughing at me.

"You're making that face again, the pouty one. Rose, you're too cute." He leaned in to give me a kiss and I took advantage of the moment with his guard down. I flipped so I was on top of him and I gave him a quick kiss on the cheek.

"Meet ya there, loser."

I took off again. I beat him to the house by about ten seconds. My clothes and hair had dried on the run back. I didn't have time to gloat to Emmett right now because everyone was already on top of us. Everyone was saying happy birthday and hugging me and kissing me and asking how we were.

We all moved inside and continued the reunion. Emmett was already wrestling with Jasper. Naturally. Renesmee ran up to see me and gave me a huge hug.

"Happy Birthday Aunt Rosalie! You should move back already, I miss you!"

"Hey, thanks. Oh I don't know if I could…You kind of smell like your pet dog."

We both laughed good-naturedly at my reference to her smelly werewolf boyfriend.

"Not gonna defend me, babe? Whatever, it's cool." Jake walked in from outside looking mock offended.

"How am I supposed to defend you? You are a smelly werewolf," she shot right back at him.

"I knew I was around long enough to make sure you knew how the world worked," I winked.

Jake rolled his eyes but came over and gave me a hug and said happy birthday.

"Can we tell her now?! PLEASE! I can't take this anymore, I'm losing my mind!" Bella looked like she was practically vibrating. She looked like Alice on a shoe shopping trip.

"Tell me what?"

"Nice one Mom. We were supposed to wait until after everyone was settled! Jeez…"

"Rosalie, Carlisle found a way that you can have a baby."