Complicated Feelings...

Chapter one:

Dear Diary,

I am sorry to tell you that you are going to have to suffer my version of my complicated life. I would tell Ginny but she is a little pre-occupied at the moment. Now don't get me wrong I am so glad Ginny has made up with Harry but not when I cannot stand beside them without feeling like an awkward third wheel. I suppose it is not too bad as I can head to the library and study for upcoming O.W.L.S (Ordinary Wizarding Levels) At least Harry is at least trying to study for them as well, Ginny told me he is only working so hard so he can provide a decent life for the two of them. Sweet. *Sigh* I so wish I could say the same for Ron. He does not give a dam if he fails all of his O.W.L.S as long as his girlfriend Lavender is happy. They call each other Lav-Lav and Won-Won. Eugh. I on the other hand just simply cannot afford to waist any time on all of this relationship crap because I am just so snowed under with work. Harry suggested I drop Arithmancy so then ill have a normal timetable. But no I could not do that, I mean not only is it very interesting it is also my favourite subject.,I mean perhaps when I have finished with exams I could look for someone... Nah. I mean what the hell is the point of falling in love and losing focus of every thing important in life.

Hermione sighed as she closed her diary feeling so happy she had the option to let everything out and then lock it away. Hermione started to carry it everywhere with her and sometimes she would slip it into her schoolbooks and write in it during class time. After she had finished her work obviously. It just so happened that during this particular potions lesson she was not the only person secretly writing in a diary and locking away their personnel feelings and problems. A certain blond boy in emerald green robes was also writing in a diary. His name was Draco Malfoy.

Chapter Two:

Dear Diary,

Here I am sitting in potions staring at her again. I cannot help it wherever she goes my eyes try to follow her. She is perfect. Everything about her. Her hair, the way her face is always filled with concentration, her steady hands, her perfume *Sigh* I cannot believe that the stupid Ronald Weasley had the chance to be with her and he blew it by going out with that blond bimbo Lavender! Oh god imagine my father reading this. The dark Lords most faithful servant. The Dark Lord who goes out of his way to kill people like her. You see I am a pure blood. (I only have wizard blood in my body) But she is a muggle born. (Parents are not wizards) My father calls her type mudbloods. Literally translating to dirty blood. If he even knew half of what I feel for her he would die of shame. But I really do not give a dam what he and my mother think any more. I am in love with her but I spent the first few years of our school years telling her how she does not belong here in the wizarding world. Maybe I could convince her I need her to pull a trick on Ron. She was heartbroken when he picked Lavender over her. Yes that is exactly what I shall do.

And with that Draco closed his own diary and decided to follow Hermione to the library at lunch. The rest of potions seemed to drag on and on for Draco but he seen it as a chance to make a fully developed plan to show Hermione to make her agree to working with him. Some time later Professes Snape`s voice finally stopped and told them to pack up their books and wait for the bell. As soon as Draco had stuffed his books into his own bags he rushed over to Hermione to help her put her books away. Draco smiled to himself as he approached Hermione. Ron was with Lavender and Harry was texting Ginny so he had Hermione to himself.

'Hey Hermione, would you like some help to put away your books?' Hermione turned expecting to see Harry but instead seen Draco.

'No thanks Draco, I'll manage' Hermione said pleasantly.

Just then the bell for lunch went and Harry went over to join Hermione who was still surprised Draco was still talking to her.

'Hey Bookworm' Harry said teasingly 'Are you eating lunch today?'

'No thanks Harry, I have a lot of work to do and DO NOT call me bookworm ever again please' Hermione then turned to Draco ' Look Draco thank you for the offer but it is not very nice to leave Pansy waiting for you'

Harry instantly asked 'What offer?' Draco smiled at Harry and said ' Well I noticed yesterday that Hermione was a little uncomfortable sitting with you and Ginny so I asked her if she would have liked to sit with me oh and Hermione Pansy and I are finished she cheated on me with some other guy'

Hermione looked startled at his answer ' Well bye, Harry, Draco' and just like that she was gone. Harry now turned to Draco and asked him in a rather threatening voice ' What the hell are you playing at Malfoy?, Stay away from her or else' 'Wow temper temper Potter I was only making conversation since you were busy.' Draco spun on his heel left the now startled Harry and headed towards the library. It did not take Draco long to locate Hermione in the massive library. There she was sitting at the central table where she always sat. However Draco was surprised to find she had fallen asleep on top of a heavy book. Draco strode over to Hermione and poked her gently with his finger. She woke up suddenly and groaned when she seen who it was. 'Draco please go away and let me sleep' Hermione pleaded.

'I was just wondering why you are not sleeping in your dorm' Draco asked.

' I cannot get in because Ginny has locked the door, she is probably with Harry' Hermione replied.

'How about you come to my dorm, I have my own dorm and I can make sure you can get rest without any disturbance' Draco suggested.

Hermione looked up at Draco and for the first time ever saw kindness on his face. She thought about his offer and then nodded. Draco smiled.

'Well al right then right this way madame' Draco said as he pulled Hermione up to her feet. Draco felt a tingle inside himself when Hermione took his hand to pull herself up. Hermione also felt the same strange tingle sensation in her body.

'How did you know where I was?' Hermione asked curiously.

'Well Bookworm, when your friend mentioned that it was pretty obvious where you would be' Draco answered casually before adding 'Your friend Harry seems to think I am going to hurt you in some way because he told me to stay away from you or else' Hermione looked at his face and said 'Well he can not tell me how to live my life but why didn't you listen to Harry?' She asked.

'Well Bookworm, the truth is I really need your help but I shall let you get some rest first then we shall talk all right?' Hermione nodded. They had now reached Slytherin common room where every single pair of eyes landed on Hermione. A riot instantly broke out. People started shouting abuse at Hermione and Draco telling him to get the mudblood out of their common room.

Chapter Three:

Hermione whimpered next to Draco and whispered to him that she was going to go. Draco took a deep breath and stared right back at the angry slytherins

'Listen to me right now' Draco snarled ' First thing you all owe Hermione an apology for calling her that filthy name, Second Hermione is with me so do not dare to say anything about her or you will have me to deal with' The slytherins muttered their apologizes. Draco smiled and slipped his hand into Hermione's hand. He smiled at her surprise and said to her 'I told you I would look after you did I not' He whispered in her ear that he would explain in a moment and added 'Right come on babe, lets go into my dorm' Draco lead her past everyone and closed his dorm door behind him. 'Listen I am so sorry about that if I had known they all would have been here... he broke of.

But Hermione just looked at him and saw how much he actually cared for her.

'Did you really mean all that Draco or do you just need my help playing a prank' Draco turned to see that she was holding up his diary. He grinned rather sheepishly.

"I well I, you see I can explain"

Hermione scoffed at Draco's stuttering.

"It is fine Draco, what do you think I am going to go crazy or something?"

Draco thought back to his third year when Hermione had punched him in the face. Hermione remembered this memory as well when Draco rubbed his face.

"Uh yeah about that, I am sorry but you did deserve that punch Draco" Hermione pointed out.

"Yeah even I'll admit I was an idiot back then" Draco admitted.

"Ah well at least you admit it" Hermione teased, "But you have changed Draco, a lot even you can't deny it"

"But do you feel the same?" Draco questioned "Because if you don't and you still think I am a total prat then"... Draco continued babbling on and Hermione just sighed. She knew what it would take to shut him up. She threw her arms around Draco's neck and pulled him closer towards her for a hug.

Hermione smirked at Draco's reaction.

"Does that answer your question Draco?"

"Uh yeah I guess so" He smiled.

"Draco there is one thing I have to do, I have to tell Ginny and Harry." They left the common room to go find Harry and Ginny.

" Well hurry up then bookworm, or we will miss them" Draco teased. Draco was surprised to see Hermione smile. "I thought you didn't like that name"

"I don't but it ,it's different when it's you" Hermione admitted blushing. Draco smirked.

"Ah and there is that evil brooding smirk I've been missing" She teased. Draco looked down at the floor smiling.

"Right I have to go back up to my dorm now" Hermione announced. Draco looked up at her.

"Why?" He asked.

"Well I have to get my muggle studies books"

"Why do you even take that class, I mean you do live with muggles."

"Well it is very interesting" Hermione babbled.

"Well I have a free period next, why don't you join me"

"Oh no Draco, I couldn't just skip a class"

"Well don't then I can go find Blaine" Draco said.

"Why don't you use it to study?" Hermione teased.

"Nothing to study" Draco replied.

"Well I'm sorry but I must get my books"

"Look you read my diary entry. I love you. I always have and always will. I've never felt like this about anyone before" Draco muttered softly in her ear.

"What about Pansy?" Hermione questioned.

"Come what may, I will always love you I'd feel forever blue if you weren't with me, I'm so in love with you"

"Wow Draco Moulin Rouge, im impressed" Hermione sniggered. Draco smiled at her.

"Hey I can be ever so romantic you know" Draco said as he leaned in towards and kissed her.

Chapter Four:

"OUCH, GINNY WHAT WAS THAT FOR?" Hermione exclaimed.

"For not telling you were with that ass." Ginny said casually.

"He is not an ass, well not any more"

"Well fine then I'll give him ONE chance"

"Really?, oh Ginny thank you but I've gotta go"

"Oh go then go find your blond dreamboat" Ginny smiled at Hermione's face. " Oh come on Hermione even when he was an ass he was still hot, even you have to admit it"

"Yeah he was" Hermione smiled.

"Hey bookworm Harry just text me sounds like Draco is with him" Ginny said.

"What do you mean by that?" Hermione asked.

"Who else calls me red?"

"True, lets go then"

Draco smiled when he saw Hermione enter the great hall.

"Ah look my perfect girl" Draco announced.

"Hey Draco, so uh you and Harry are talking?" Hermione asked.

"Yeah don't sound too surprised" Draco teased. He turned to Ginny. " Hey red hows the O.W.L.S going?"

"Fine thanks Draco, so what were you boys talking about"

"Hmm let me think, you two, you two, you two uh and you two, did I miss anything Harry" Draco replied.

"No think you got it all Draco" answered Harry.

"Really, that is all you talk about?" asked Hermione.

"Well yeah, I have nothing else that is perfect to talk about" Draco replied. Hermione blushed. Ginny smiled.

"Aw look how happy they are together" She whispered in Harry's ear. Not quite quiet enough though as Draco overheard. He cleared his throat loudly before looking across at Ron and Lavender who were sitting hand in hand, he then turned to Ginny. Hermione was watching Draco suspiciously.

"Sorry Red, I uh seemed to have missed that, could you perhaps repeat it please?" Draco asked. Ginny stared at him. She knew Draco had heard because she seen him smirking as he looked across at Ron. Harry nudged Ginny. She looked at what Harry meant. Across the table Ron was glaring at Hermione and Draco sitting together. He was clearly jealous.

"Sure thing Draco" Ginny said sweetly. Draco winked at her.

" You see I was just commenting on how cute you and Hermione look together"

" And how happy Hermione is now" Harry reminded.

"Yes that as well, she is so much happier now than when she was with Ron" Ginny continued as she glared at Ron. Hermione looked too. She was shocked to see Ron's face filled with anger considering the fact he was sitting next to his girlfriend Lavender. Draco saw too, he mouthed thanks to Ginny. He then smirked before loudly saying " Yeah well this amazing girl..." He put a arm around Hermione's waist. " She is his loss" " But she is my gain" He added before kissing Hermione. Apparently this was all too much for Ron.

" Jeez Hermione your standers dropped a lot, he'll only hurt you, you are just being a stupid little cow"

" For your information Ronald, he is nothing like you so I have nothing to worry about"

"Ah OK, so you just latched yourself onto the first male you came across, or is he dating you out of pity because you had no one?"

" Neither" Draco growled.

"So Hermione, you got with Draco a month after we broke

up, jeez what a little slut you are"

There was a lot of yelling.

And punching.

Harry, Ginny and Draco flew for Ron, but Draco won.

" Don't you ever ever say that to her again or you'll regret it"

But before another word could be said ,Professor McGonagall was there.

"And what exactly is the meaning of this" She demanded. Her eyes sweeping across the scene. She looked at Draco who still had Ron pinned down, to Ginny pulling Lavender's long ringlet curls to Hermione who had got caught in the middle. Her eyes then diverted to Harry who was trying to help a distraught Hermione up. Professor McGonagall looked at Harry.

"Potter?" Harry looked up. "Yes Professor?" Harry said.

"Potter, what happened here is Draco giving you trouble?" She asked as her eyes lingered to the spot which Draco was battling Ron. Harry sighed. Ron was his friend. Should he tell?

"No professor it was Ron and Lavender who instigated it" Everyone was surprised. "You see professor Hermione and Draco are a thing now and Ron can't bear to see them together" Harry paused before continuing. "And well he called Hermione a name so Draco, well you can see, and Ginny I am not to sure about" Harry finished. This shocked Professor McGonagall. Not sure she wanted to know she asked " Ginny care to explain" Ginny looked straight at the angry professor.

"Well when Draco flew at Ron, she went for Hermione when her back was turned and I don't agree with that at all so when I said this she punched me" Her story sounded unlikely considering she was on Lavender but she did have a huge red mark on her face. Professor McGonagall sighed.

"Right well if you do not wish to spend tonight in detention with me, Ronald and Lavender I suggest you get of miss Brown. McGonagall said. Ginny was startled. She was not expecting that. For a second she stayed put still registering what her teacher had said, then she got up. Ron spoke for the first time since he had insulted Hermione. "Wait, so me and Lav..." He pulled Lavender close to him then continued "We get a detention and they don't" He exclaimed with anger. Right on cue his nose spluttered blood everywhere. McGonagall frowned. "Hospital wing Weasley, oh and Malfoy I will have to take 25 points of Slytherin for the nose" Draco was honestly surprised."Uh yeah fair enough Professor but you could have taken away 100 and I wouldn't have cared, it was so worth it" Draco said. McGonagall smiled. "Granger keep this one close"

"I will Professor McGonagall" Hermione smiled cuddling into Draco.

Chapter Five:

Once Draco, Hermione, Harry and Ginny had left the grand hall, Harry and Ginny made to leave but Draco stopped them.

"Look Potter, thanks for that, it was decent of you" Draco said awkwardly. Harry stared at him. This was Draco Malfoy his arch enemy at Hogwarts thanking him. Harry seen Draco had changed. He shrugged then replied. "It was the right thing to do, sorry about the hard time I gave you uh call me Harry"

Draco smirked. "Its okay Harry, same here call it truce?" Draco held out his hand just like he had in their first year. Hermione and Ginny held their breath shocked at the scene in front of them, Harry and Draco both noticed this and smirked again. Harry took Draco's hand and shook it. Draco smiled at Harry. "Right well I am going to go give my girlfriend a tour of the grounds" Draco said casually. Ginny was confused. She was about to point out that Hermione had seen the grounds many times before but Harry nudged her. Harry had met Draco's eyes. "Oh okay Draco, we'll just be going this way, have fun"

Harry said while taking Ginny's hand and pulling her towards the stairs. Once they were out of sight from Draco and Hermione ,Ginny stopped. She glared at Harry. "And what exactly was all that about?" Harry sighed. "Ginny they need to be alone at the moment this event will bring them closer together and Draco was dying to get Hermione by herself." He said rather smugly. "How do you know that" Ginny asked.

"The way he was looking at her, his eyes just lit up, he really has changed Ginny , he does love her you can't fake that look."

"And you know this because..."

"Cause its exactly how I look at you every day" Harry said softly. "come on lets go follow them" Harry said. "but you just said..." Harry cut Ginny off. "yeah they think we're not there but we will be" Ginny looked shocked. "oh come on Ginny its not like Hermione didn't do it with us" She smiled. "well come on then" She said taking Harry's hand, it didn't take long to find them they were standing next to the black lake. Ginny spied some hedges and signalled to Harry who followed suit and they went into hiding.

Chapter six:

Draco was happy he made a truce with Harry. He knew it would have happened eventually with Harry being one of her best friends. Hermione seen him smiling. She smiled too. "Y'know when you smile you look even more gorgeous than before you should do it more often" Draco turned to look at her but she was already back to looking across the lake. He heard a stick snapping behind him, he turned round, Ginny tried to duck but he had already seen her. Draco rolled his eyes at her but smiled to let her know he didn't mind one bit. Draco moved a strand of Hermione's hair out her face, pulling on one of the curls and watching it spring back into place. Hermione turned to face him but before she could speak Draco placed a finger over her lips. He smiled at her startled face. Hermione gasped softly as Draco grabbed her waist and pulled her close to his body. He gazed into her eyes, he glanced down at her lips while biting his own, he looks back to her eyes again then gently outs his hand underneath her chin then slowly leaned in and kissed her. Hermione closed her eyes, just letting the sensation take over her before putting her arms round Draco's neck. Draco started kissing Hermione's neck while she gasped softly. She dropped her hands to around Draco's waist. Her sleeve rolled up and it was then Draco seen the word engraved into her wrist. Hermione noticed Draco had tensed up so she opened her eyes. She followed his eye line until she found what Draco had tensed up at. For there on her wrist was engraved the word "mudblood". Draco looked at Hermione shocked. He opened his mouth to speak but this time Hermione cut him off. She sighed deeply. "Yes Draco, mudblood, that is my blood status and I am proud of it" Draco stared at her bewildered. "But all the pain you went through because of …. because of well" Draco didn't want to finish his sentence. Hermione wasn't afraid though. "Because of your family? I do know Draco, I haven't forgotten" She smirked slightly at Draco's face. "What?" She asked innocently.

"The way you can just casually talk about it, it just well it amazes me" Draco said "I am so sorry, I mean look what it has done to you because my family are stupid pure blood manics" Draco finished angrily as he kicked a tree. Hermione stormed away from him muttering under her breath, Draco followed.

Harry and Ginny were in shock. They had been watching but they hadn't been close enough to hear what had been said. Ginny knew she would have to be brave in order to save her best friends relationship. "Right you go comfort Hermione" She said. Harry stared at her. "Well Harry she won't listen to me about Draco but I know you can convince her and I am good at calming people down which at the moment it looks like Draco needs me more than he needs you right now" Harry nodded, he didn't want to believe it but he knew it was true.

It didn't take Harry long to find his friend. He knew about her secret place. It was like the room of requirement but once one person had found it only they can get in. But the first time Hermione had discovered it she was upset about Ron and Harry had followed her. When Harry reached the library door he looked at the wall beside it and muttered the incantation. He felt triumphant when a brass handle appeared. There she was sobbing into a pillow, Harry felt uneasy as he looked at the state of Hermione and hoped Ginny had found Draco. Ginny was stressed to the max looking for Draco. She racked her brains for a clue. Then she remembered Draco had an owl who he was close to. She raced upstairs to the owlery. Draco was there but Ginny screamed when she saw him. There he was collapsed on the floor, surrounded by a pool of blood. Ginny gasped in horror as she looked at his slit wrists and the bloody blade lying on the floor. Her eyes searched for Draco's owl and finally she found it. It had a letter bound to its leg. Ginny took the letter off its leg and read it. Shaking she conjured up a quill and parchment and wrote a note, she called to Hedwig. "Listen Hedwig, I need you to find Harry and make him read this even if you have to peck him, its important okay?" The snowy owl blinked at Ginny then spread its magnificent wings and flew off. Ginny took of her school jumper and tie and wrapped them around Draco's pale wrists to stop the bleeding, then lifted his head and put it on her lap to rest. She tried to unbutton his shirt to take the pressure away from his heart but Draco muttered "No, I have a girlfriend" Ginny started crying. "Listen Draco its me, Ginny, now I have to take your shirt of you to let your heart rest okay, Hermione is coming" Draco tried to sit up. But Ginny wouldn't let him. Now she had to wait for Harry.

Chapter Seven:

Hermione was still sobbing into Harry's arms. She blamed herself for the fight and it was so stupid. At that moment Hedwig appeared. Harry looked at her in surprise. "Hedwig! I'm busy you know the rules now go" But Hedwig had sensed the urgency in Ginny's voice so she started to peck him. Harry looked at her startled. Hedwig never disobade him. Then he noticed the letter she was clutching and the elegant writing.

Harry gave Hermione a appologetic look before taking the letter. He noticed the small print on the envelope to be Ginny's. His eyes read over the letter. He dropped it in shock. Hermione looked at him. "Harry, can I look?" she asked kindly pointing to the letter. Harry nodded. "Hermione once you've read it go to Dumbledore straight away okay, promise me that you will show him this while I help Ginny." Hermione nodded and watched as Harry bolted picked up the letter and read it. She found herself re-reading it. No, no, no, no, no thought Hermione. She gasped to hold in the tears. She found herself standing outside the headmasters study. Unsure how she managed to get there when everything was so blury, she desperatly tried to remember the password. She knew it was some sort of sweet. Lemon drops, gummy bears, lolly pops. Come on Hermione she thought to herself. Then she remembered a joke the headmaster had shared with the school about... "CANDY CANES" She shouted. The stone gargoyle leapt away from the door allowing her to go through. Albus Dumbledore was delighted to see Hermione, as one of the best students in the school she made very good conversation and sometimes she popped in for a intelligent chat. "Oh hello Miss Granger, how are you" Then he noticed the girl was shaking with sobs. "Miss Granger, what is wrong" Hermione handed over the letter. Hermione collapsed to the floor. "H H Harry and G Ginny are with him" The headmaster looked very surprised. "Fawkes will you go to the owl ery, you will meet Mr Potter there and he'll give you instructions" The phonix flew off. "Miss Granger if you don't mind my asking in this hard time, why is Mr Potter with Mr Malfoy after all they are sworn enemies?" Hermione turned to him and sobbed "Because me and Draco are a couple so they became friends for me but I had an argument with Draco and and this is all my fault" Albus smiled. "I know this is nor the time or place but I always knew it would be you to bring the houses together, now come Miss Granger if Draco is conscious, I believe the only person he will listen to is you" He held out his arm and Hermione took it. With the room swirling she found herself in the owlery after apparating. As her eyes swept across the owlery she found Harry sitting over Draco trying to stop the bleeding. Hermione's knees gave in as she looked at the bloody mess that was Draco. She kneeled down beside him and took his hand. Harry stood up and hugged Ginny who was sobbing silently. "I'm sorry, I didn't know what to do" She wailed. Draco stirred and muttered "Red where is Hermione you promised she would be here" Hermione squeezed Draco's hand gently. "I'm here Draco don't worry, I will help you" "Hermione, you came, I'm sorry I shouldn't have argued with you its just I seen your scar and and" Draco trailed of. "Draco it is fine honest, now sit still so I can heal you" "Hermione I love you" Hermione started crying. "I love you too Draco" She waved her wand and muttered a spell under her breath. Draco's scars stopped bleeding insantly. "I can't vanish the scars away i'm afraid" "I don't want rid of them, they tell the story of us" Draco smiled weakly. Hermione looked at him and the smirk on his face. "You stupid,stupid git Malfoy! How dare you? I've been feeling so guilty because I knew the argument had caused it yet you meant to do this to tell a bloody story and Harry has had me wailing on his shoulder for the past half hour while Ginny was frantically searching the castle for you when when when..." She trailed off as Draco put a finger to her lips. "Shh darling it was nothing like that" He soothed. "Well what was it then?" Draco winced in pain as he tried to sit up. "I know how stubborn you are so I knew you would never have dropped this and I didn't want to be here if you weren't in this life with me" Hermione turned to see Ginny smiling. Ginny nodded. Hermione knew what was right but this was Hermione Jean Granger and she never let anything go. Ah but ,said a little voice at the back of her mind, look what he has done for you. Hermione suddenly didn't care any more. She had found someone who was prepared to do anything to be with her. Hermione pulled Draco to his feet, wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him. A loud sniffle behind her reminded her that the headmaster was still there. She turned round rather pink. Albus Dumbledore was sobbing gently. "Professor are you alright?" Hermione asked. The headmaster looked at her and smiled. "Yes everything is wonderful, I always knew this day would come, the day Slytherin and Gryfindor unite as one, hospital wing Mr Malfoy and Miss Granger, Miss Weasley and Mr Potter may accompany if they wish, I will let Madam Pomfrey know" and with that the headmaster turned and apparated out of the room.