A/N: This is a role play written by both White Black Truth Lies and I. It was just something random that we conjured up.
AN: Hi. My name is Lies. I'm a werewolf. And I'm very distracted. And I'm not giving Agent anything to type so she is typing for me while I slack off. There's a dinosaur behind you! Oh no! Or was it an octopus? No I'm pretty sure it's a dinosaur. Back to you Agent with the disclaimer!
Disclaimer: We own nothing but ourselves! *Ghost noises*
Key: Lies - normal
Agent - bold italic
Lies: boing, boing, boing, boing... owww!
Agent: What happened?
Lies: I jumped into a wall!
Agent: *snort*
Lies: It's not funny!
Agent: ...
Lies: It's not!
Agent: ...
Lies: It's not!
Agent: Sure it's not...
Lies: *sighs* you're mean.
Agent: *grin* you're just finding that out?
Lies: *splutters in indignation*
Agent: Idiot.
Lies: So what are we going to talk about?
Agent: Well, since I'm high, I thought we could *drum roll* ROLEPLAY!
Lies: *Cheers*
Agent: Wow, I really can't spell. Anyway, mental blank.
Lies: *face palms*
Agent: Lol, face palm. *giggles insanely.*
Lies: Do you want a sandwich?
Agent: sure!
Lies: What kind? I have honey, or chicken, or bear, or honey...
Agent: Wait, what!
Lies: What, what?
Agent: What was that last one?
Lies: Honey?
Agent: No! The one before that!
Lies: Bear?
Agent: Yes!
Lies: What about it?
Agent: *stares blankly* Do you really not see what is weird about that kind of sandwich?
Lies: Uhhh...
Agent: Just as dimwitted as usual...
Lies: That's me! Dim,idiotic, clumsy Lies!
Agent: Don't admit to it dummy!
Lies: Who are you calling dummy!
Agent: -sigh- Nevermind. So... do you think we should invite a few anime characters into this rolplay. Cause, at the moment it's just us typing a whole bunch of crap. Lol.
Lies: True. Add away.
Agent: *Devious grin* All right! I choose... Ichigo Kurosaki!
Lies: Wait, why him?
Agent: Simple. Carrot top has funny hair. *grins*
Ichigo: I do not!
Agent: Do too.
Ichigo: I do not! * brings out his Zanpukto Zangetsu* You better not say that again.
Agent: Do too.
Ichigo: *Tries to slice Agent with Zanpukto but fails.* What the...?
Agent: Missed me.
Lies: Why do I hang out with her again?
Agent: Same reason I hang out with you.
Ichigo: Can I go now?
Lies and Agent: No!
Ichigo: Please?
Lies: We will tell you when you can go, until then… *Lies takes out gun from pocket of air* DANCE! *Starts shooting at Ichigo's feet*
Ichigo: What the hell! You're crazy!
Lies: That's what my doctor tells me, but I don't believe him, it's not my fault if every time I leave his office it's colored in pink and purple.
Ichigo and Agent: *awkward silence*
Lies: What?
Agent: I didn't know you were that insane * Leans over to Ichigo* Do you think it's safe to hang around her?
Ichigo: Definitely not.
Agent: Thought so, Let us go.
Agent and Ichigo: *turn and flee*
Lies: Hey! *Runs after them, bullets flying crazily*
Shippo: They didn't even notice me. How sad. Am I that insignificant?
The ghosts of Lies, Agent and Ichigo: *In creepy ghostlike voice* Yeessss!
Everyone: *returns*
Agent: You know what, I think we should invite L. He's always in the role-plays.
L: -sigh- I was just about to catch Kira. Why did you summon me?
Agent: Because I could. Plus, you're entertaining. *Evil grin*
Lies: Uh…I don't like the look of that grin. Agent, stop grinning!
Agent: *pokes out tongue* Make me.
Lies: *aims gun*
L: You know, I am a detective and I could put you in jail if you kill her. But I can also look the other way. *grin*
Agent: You'll let her kill me? I thought we were friends.
L: We were until you summoned me.
Agent: Dude, you already caught Kira in the first role-play between Boat and I.
L: *remembers* Oh yeah.
Lies: -face palm-
L: Well I haven't had candy in three minutes!
Everyone: *stares*
L: *Now visibly distressed* Well it's a long time!
Everyone: *Stares*
L: Stop staring! * Sobs and runs away*
Agent: Right…
Lies: In case you've forgotten my dear, dear friend. Run, you're going to die. *Cocks gun*
Agent: NOOOO! WHY! I'm too young to die!
Ichigo: No one is too young to die.
Lies:*stares* That was deep dude.
Ichigo: Well, I'm not a bone head!
Lies: Yeah, but…
Agent: You kinda look like one.
Ichigo: You guys are so cold. *Runs off sobbing*
Lies: Why do people keep running away from us in tears?
Edward Alric suddenly appears behind them, Lies and Agent don't notice….
Ed: Because you guys are THE BOMB!
Agent: Wow, OOC much?
Ed: *runs* The bomb, the bomb.
Agent: Look, I know I'm awesome, but you don't need to…
Ed: *Runs past Agent* The bomb!
Lies: What bomb is he talking about?
Agent: Pfft, as if I know.
*Whistling sound*
Agent: How cliché. The bomb is gonna fall on us, and we're gonna die.
Lies: *Disappears*
Agent: -sigh- Fine, I'm vanishing.
*Bomb falls* *explodes* *Everything on fire*
Agent and Lies: *Reappear*
Agent: It seems the writers of this role-place are running out of funny ideas.
Lies: Yeah, Agent, we're the writers.
Agent: You think I haven't worked that out? I was pointing out that we're lazy.
Lies: -sigh- I won't argue with you. There's no point.
Agent: Yes there is.
Lies: Will you stop arguing!
Agent: Never!
Lies: Fine, I think I want an ice-cream. *walks over to ice-cream stand that sits in the middle of the blast zone*
Agent: *trailing after her* Uh, Lies? Don't you think it's weird that the only thing that didn't die or disintegrate in the blast was an ice-cream stand?
Lies: *turning away from ice-cream stall* No….
Agent:* Looks at the huge, terrifying, scary monster rising up from the ice-cream stand* Lies…
Lies: Shhh…. I'm trying to concentrate!
Agent: Lies…
Lies: shut up!
Agent: lies….
Lies: Oh for god sake! Shut the hell up, I'm trying to decide between chocolate or strawberry and all I can hear is you and a very ominous roaring noise!
Agent: Lies!
Lies: What?
Agent: *points*
Lies: *turns*
Lies and Agent: AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
The role-play will be back in a moment
Ad:
Boy: Mom, I'm hungry and there's nothing good to eat.
Mom: Try this cereal. *gives cereal*
Boy: Wow, it looks so good! *Eats* It's so chocolately.
Mom: That's right, and it's only 75% sugar.
Boy: Wow, that's so healthy.
Mom: *to audience* If you're a mother like me, you've probably noticed you kids are getting fatter. But with this cereal, Chocy puffs, they'll lose weight instantly.
*Song* Chocy puffs, tons of sugar, just for you.
We will now return to the role-play.
Agent: What. The hell. Was that?
Lies: Umm…an advert I think.
Agent: Ok then…
Lies: We need to add in more people.
Agent: There's a massive monster behind you right now and you want to add in more characters.
Lies: Yep, they can help us fight!
Agent: -sigh- Add away
Lies: See. I'm smart.
Agent: I call forth…. Light!
Lies: And I call add… Alphonse Alric!
Agent: *stares* why a tin can?
Lies: Oh, that is so mean! he isn't a tin can!
Al: You like to hurt people, don't you agent?
Agent: More then anything in the entire world.
Al: Even kitty cats?
Agent: Especially kitty cats.
Al: That is so… sad!
Lies: huh?
Al: Well, Agent is obviously sick, when does your life expire oh mental one?
Lies: *Cracks up*
Agent: Uh…
Al: No, that's alright, don't talk, save your energy.
Monster: I'm still here…
Al: Get lost, can't you see this poor person is going to die?
Monster: I'm very sorry for y our illness. *runs off*
Al: Now, why don't you lie down? I'll bring you some tea. Do you like soup? Oh, I should bring a kitten, it will make you feel better. *walks off in search of comforting things*
Lies: hmmm….
Agent: *shakes head* I'm not going to die! Am I?
Lies: *sneaky grin* I'm sorry Agent. I wasn't going to tell you, I didn't want you to worry, but… your test results came back a week ago…
Agent: Test results? I didn't have any tests done. What the hell did you do to me?
Lies: *Evil grin*
Agent: -sigh- Whatever. Wait, where's Light?
Light: Here. *Eats potato chip dramatically.
Agent: Great! L!
L: *Comes flying out of the sky* Kkkiiiirrraaaa
Agent: You're dead Light!
Light: Not if I can help it! *Uses shield*
Lies: What the heck goes on in your head?
Agent: *Sings* Sunshine, lollipops and rainbows…
Lies: Ok…
Al: *Returns* Here, I brought you a kitty.
Agent: Can I call him Train?
Al: Sure ^^
Agent: Awesome!
Train: *Transforms in to Train Heartnet* Will you stop scratching behind my ears!
Agent: Whoa, he's a person. Can I use your gun?
Train: Uhh…sure…
Agent: Awesome. *Points gun at Lies* That's for telling me I'm gonna die.
Lies: I'm sorry!
Agent: No your not.
Lies: *sigh* You're right, I'm not.
Agent: Ah ha! Your true colors come out at last!
Lies: Yes, yes they do. *pulls out knife* Now you're going to die now, instead of in a month.
Ichigo suddenly appearing
Ichigo: That's not a knife, *pulls out huge knife* this is a knife!
Lies: Ichigo, but out, this isn't your duel.
AL: You aren't in a dual.
Lies: Oh yeah. *pulls out glove from another pocket of air* These air pockets are so handy. *Walks over to Agent*
I challenge you, to a duel! *Slaps Agents cheek with glove*
Everyone else but Lies and Agent: Ohhh….
Agent: *Slaps Lies back* I accept!
Later, at sundown in the duel arena…
Referee: I want a clean, fair fight…
Lies: Agent, why did we pick a flower throwing duel?
Agent: Flowers are awesome!
Al: Yeah!
L: This is, not right.
Light: I agree. The concept of throwing flowers at each other in a fight to the death is ludicrous.
Ed: Kill each other already!
Agent: Make us!
Lies: Take this! *Throws daisy*
Agent: Is that it? *Throws pansy*
Lies: Lame *Throws lilly*
L: This is pointless
Agent: -sigh- I'm bored *walks off*
Lies: I win!
Light: No you didn't. The winner was the one who survived.
Al: That means you both win!
Agent: Yay, trophy time!
L: Let us eat cake!
Agent: Yes! Cake. What type of cake?
L: Strawberry!
Agent: *grin*
Lies: Does she realise that your behind her, L?
L: I don't think so…
Al: Agent!
Agent: YES?
Al: *Throws ball* Go fetch the ball.
Agent: *Pulls Al's head off* I'm not a dog!
Train: Meow.
Everyone: *Weird look at Train*
Train: Ahem…Sorry, habit.
Lies: I have the habit of falling down.
Agent: I have the habit of randomly laughing for no reason.
Ed: I have the habit of running away from milk.
Al: I have the habit of… Kitty Cat! *runs off*
L: I have the habit of… sweets! *runs off*
Light: I have the habit of killing people.
Awkward silence…
Light: And you are all next! *pulls out death note*
Ryuk: Nobody summoned me… don't you care about poor Ryuk?
Everyone, who hadn't run off for sweets and cats: No!
Ryuk: You're all evil!
Lies: I love yellow.
Light: Yellow?
Lies: Yep, it's so… yellowy.
Agent: Right….
Lies: *grin*
Three hours later…
Lies: I can't believe we are all so boring that we couldn't think of one thing to talk about in three whole hours!
Agent: I can believe it. I mean, look at us, we're pretty boring people.
L: I'm not boring.
Agent: True. You are pretty entertaining. Especially when I push you over. Moo-hahaha.
Lies: Moo?
Agent: *continues to laugh*
Light: So… been to any strip clubs lately?
Agent and Lies: o_O
Light: What?
Agent: Moron.
Ryuk: Can I have an apple now?
Light: No
Ryuk: Please?
Agent: Of course you can ^^ *Gives Ryuk bag of apples*
Light: Oh why? Why did you do that? Now he'll only go to you for apples and I'll… be left alone… *grins* oh my god! Thankyou, thankyou, thankyou! *bows at agents feet as Ryuk asks Agent for more apples*
Lies: *In sing song voice* Let us all skip in the rain, for it is so much fun! *screams* AHHHHH! Acid rain! *runs around in circles*
Thirty minutes later…
Under an umbrella…
With pink and purple polka dots…
Someone fainted…
Who fainted?
Let's find out…
Under the umbrella…
Lies: Ahhh Agent fainted!
Ed: WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SMALL HE COULD LIVE IN AN ANTS BELLY COMFORTABLY AND EAT PANCAKES AND DANCE AND SING AND DRINK FROM RAINDROPS!
Lies: No one said anything like that Ed.
Ed: well, you could have.
Al: KITTY!
Light: I sing a song of six pence…
L: You are Kira!
Light: Not again…
Ichigo: I like Rukia.
Rukia: What is this human emotion? Love, Hate, oh…. It's pudding.
Train: I like pudding.
Lies: Agent, Agent are you okay?
Agent: *telepathically* this is so lame. Even while unconscious I'm bored.
Lies: Well, it's you're fault!
Agent: Says who?
Everyone: Says me!
Agent: *Revives* Ugh, I'm so bored!
Lies: We know, you already told us.
Agent: Hmm, I want to climb a mountain! In a scuba divers outfit
Lies: *Opens portal* Ok, come everyone. Out!
L: What? As if!
Agent: As if you'd say as if!
L: *Pokes tongue out*
Agent: *Throws lollipop* Fetch!
Ryuk: Can I have an apple?
Lies: You're going to get fat eating all those apples.
Agent: *Shines light on Light* Burn!
Light: Nnnnoooooooo!
Train: Yeah, I'm gonna go. See ya.
Agent: *Waves* Byeee!
Everyone else: *Leaves*
Agent: Oi, carrot top!
Ichigo: What?
Agent: Lol, you responded!
Rukia: Carrot top!
Lies: Will you stop causing so much pain?
Agent: Pfft, no. It's the most fun I've had in years.
Lies: -face palm-
Agent: *Yawns* Anyway, I think I'm gonna wrap this up. My brain is dead.
Lies: Mine's not!
Agent: *rolls eyes*
Lies: In fact, you know what!
Agent: What?
Lies: Look behind you!
Agent: What? Why? Crap. We're dead!
AN: Hi! You have just experienced the inner workings of my friend Agent, and I's minds.
I hope you all appreciate it for it took over a day to make.
Yeah, I know, a day is not that long. But I don't care, review or I will eat you. Actually I'll make agent eat you, I'm not a cannibal. Oh crap, I just realised I'm sleeping over at a cannibals house. Are her other family members cannibals too? Was this entire friendship just an elaborate ruse to get me over to her house so they could eat me? Are we really having roast Lies instead of roast chicken tonight? *starts hyperventilating*
Agent: Lies?
Lies: AHHH! *runs away*
A/N: Hey there! Nice to know that that's what you think of me Lies. *Glare* Anyway, for you know I might just be a cannibal. And maybe we will eat you tonight. Hahaha. -sigh- I really don't know what to say. Thank you for reading this role play. We hope you enjoyed it. Please review. Especially if you thought it was weird, of funny. And… we really don't mind receiving flames. ^^ Expect another role play eventually. Bye