Chapter 1: The Gamble
Terra was, to be frank, frustrated. He had said he'd show Xehanort the door, kick him out of his heart. Yet, as days and weeks passed, nothing happened. Neither of them could outdo the other. In matters of heart, all the scheming, abilities, magic, and powers did not mater. All that did was the strength of one's heart. Xehanort had the advantage at first, having submerged Terra' heart in darkness, but thanks to his Lingering Will, to Aqua, to stabbing himself with the Keyblade, and to the Master's soft but fading presence in his heart, they were on even footing.
And even footing was what it had been ever since.
He had watched, trying to appear as impassive as possible, as 'apprentice Xehanort' went about his days as an apprentice to Ansem the Wise. It was one of the few things they could do in here when not fighting against one another. He and Xehanort jabbed one another, taunting about traits they saw of themselves in persona controlling Terra's possessed body.
On the surface, the day-to-day activities and lessons the apprentice undertook, he appeared more Xehanort. Cold, intensely focused, and very curious on learning the matters of the heart. What was worse was Xehanort's trump card, Braig was there, constantly trying to steer 'Apprentice Xehanort' towards Xehanort's plans.
Terra was terrified of those moments, when the apprentice truly seemed like a younger, inexperienced Xehanort.
Yet, when 'Apprentice Xehanort' was alone, at night. He'd stare up into the night's sky, clutching the wayfinder Aqua had made Terra. He whispered questioningly to himself about friends, about the woman with blue hair, the boy with spiky blonde hair. Wondering who they were, where they were, why they weren't here with him. Terra considered himself very lucky Xehanort hadn't had a chance to dispose of the wayfinder during the brief period he had of complete control. It, and through it, his friends, were probably the only reason he hadn't given up yet.
Those moments, the strength of his friends breaking through to the confused persona, were what gave him hope. Not to mention made Xehanort very disgruntled.
So here they stood, in the darkness, both of them locked away from controlling the body and heart.
"I don't know why you bother to continue resisting," said Xehanort, "The flickers of you that bleed through are brief, hardly worth clinging to."
"They're enough," said Terra, "It shows, that deep down, there is still a light."
Xehanort scoffed. "So you say, but, as I said before. Even IF you should win, I have many roads left to take."
Terra pondered his words for a moment. When Xehanort had first said it, he had been uneasy, extremely so. He didn't know if the old man was just taunting him, trying to make him despair, or telling the truth. Being the old schemer Xehanort was, Terra wouldn't put anything past him.
Yet...
"There's one problem with that threat," said Terra.
"Oh, and what is that, boy?" asked Xehanort, amused.
Terra smirked. "You have to be out of here to take those roads, and it looks like neither of us are going anywhere."
Xehanort clasped his hands behind his back. "So you admit you cannot best me, cannot rid your heart of me."
"No more than you can do to me," shot back Terra.
Xehanort frowned. "For now."
"Forever," said Terra, narrowing his eyes, "Until the day this body dies of old age, or otherwise."
Xehanort narrowed his eyes right back, and slowly brought his hands to his side. "You seem confident of that."
"I am, to be honest, not sure I want to let you out of here," said Terra, "If I had to choose between keeping you locked away in here, or casting you out and risking you hurting my friends, I think I'd rather spend the rest of my life as your jailer. Especially since you can't enact any of your plans, if your heart is stuck in here fighting mine."
Xehanort frowned intently. "..."
"I got you there old man," said Terra smugly, crossing his arms in front of him.
"You'd truly chose to make your heart a prison for the both of us?" demanded Xehanort.
"If that's what it takes," said Terra.
"And risk never seeing your friends again?" asked Xehanort.
Terra frowned at that. "They'll... be alright."
"Will they? You saw what happened at the end of the fight, the misguided master, your 'Aqua', cast herself to darkness to save you," said Xehanort, "How long do you think she can survive in the Realm of Darkness, all alone?"
Terra tensed a bit. "She... she'll find a way out... she'll survive... I know she will."
"And if she doesn't? What about dear Ventus?" said Xehanort mockingly.
Terra frowned. "What about him?"
"Vanitas was one such road I might have taken," said Xehanort, "Through him I am aware of what state Ventus is in, sleeping, trying to recover after foolishly sacrificing himself to destroy the X-Blade from within."
Terra's eyes went wide with shock. "Ven... he... he sacrificed himself?!"
"And his body is locked away," said Xehanort, "If Aqua sealed him where I think she did, no one save for her can ever find the boy. If she dies, then Ventus remains forever lost, and Vanitas too I suppose. It would be a setback, true, but more for you than for me."
Terra clenched his fist and yelled, "Why couldn't you leave my friends alone?!"
Xehanort smiled cruelly. "They fulfilled their purposes."
He frowned. "Somewhat."
"Not really," spat Terra, "Ven blew up your X-blade, and Aqua helped to make sure you didn't stay in control of this body."
Xehanort glared at him.
"Face it old man, as you wanted to do to me, you're a prisoner in this heart," said Terra evenly, "You are going nowhere."
Xehanort pursed his lips. "So it would seem, yet, I see doubt and flickers of uncertainty in your eyes. You are not sure if you can contain me."
"I see the same thing in yours," Terra shot back, "You don't know if you can overpower me and break out."
"Perhaps," said Xehanort with a tint of concern, "So then, I ask, if we were to... compromise... say, I get Aqua out of the Realm of Darkness, and you give up this pointless resistance..."
"Like hell I will," snarled Terra, "You'd probably use me to hurt her the moment you were in control."
Xehanort frowned intently. "I refuse to be trapped here in this forsaken place!"
"I'm not letting you out old man, even... even if I have to stay here keeping you trapped for the next eighty years or so," said Terra with reluctant determination, "Give or take how long the 'apprentice' lives."
Xehanort turned his head, watching the image they could see, of 'Apprentice Xehanort' walking down the hall to his room. "Then perhaps, therein lies the answer."
Terra grew wary. "What do you mean?"
Xehanort raised a wriggling hand and pointed. "Neither of us wishes to remain trapped here, don't even deny it boy, I can see the despair in your eyes. To never be able to see your friends again, to have me as your only company until the day our ca-joined persona dies. On the flip side, I have to many plans and desires waiting to be enacted, the Keyblade War and Kingdom Hearts, to be unlocked."
"We have argued, you and I, over who influences this 'apprentice' more," said Xehanort, "Are you willing to bet everything then, on the belief that you and your friends matter more than my wisdom, and the pursuit for the X-Blade and Kingdom Hearts?"
"They DO matter more," said Terra with a bit of confusion, "But what are you going on about? I'm NOT letting you out of here."
"Then don't," said Xehanort simply, "Gamble everything, risk everything on the chance that your will matters more. Merge your heart with mine, and I, as well as you, will cease to exist."
Terra looked at him, stunned. "What?!"
"The 'apprentice' that exists now is an imperfect creation, a falsehood. If one of us were to gain an advantage here, it would effect him out there. He is not his own true person. But merge your heart with mine, and he will be," explained Xehanort.
Terra just stared at him. "I don't... follow."
Xehanort rolled his eyes. "Such inexperience, you truly are a feckless neophyte."
Terra glared at him. "Shove it old man!"
"A merge of heart, a mixture and coalition of desires, wills, and ambitions," explained Xehanort, "If we were to combine ourselves, the 'apprentice' would be reborn as an amalgamation of everything we once were."
Xehanort offered a hand. "Make your choice Terra."
Terra stared at the outstretched hand for a moment. "You're either lying, or have something up your sleeve to tip the scales in your favor. You'd never gamble like this, even if you had nothing else to lose."
Xehanort seemed amused. "I won't deny it, I do have much in my favor, and there is little in yours. Braig is right there to steer 'the apprentice' onto my path, not to mention the witch Maleficent is not as defeated as your dear Aqua would believe. I have years of experience in matters of the heart and will, to stand triumphant over you."
"So the question still remains, boy, do you trust in your friends enough to believe you can win in the merger? Or shall we continue this endless standoff, both of us a prisoner in this body until it dies, unless one of us should one day outdo the other?" inquired Xehanort, hand still outstretched.
Terra frowned intently, pondering the offer, the gamble, the challenge. He trusted in his friends, they were the cause that kept him fighting. Though, he sorely wished he had trusted in them more back when everything was falling apart. Perhaps, if he had turned to Aqua instead of angrily turning away from her at Radiant Garden, if they had returned to the Master, maybe things wouldn't have turned out like this. Ven would be okay, Aqua would still be in the Realm of Light, and he'd have kept his body.
Instead, he'd gone off by himself and been a gullible fool. Even now, he was incredibly wary that this was some kind of trap.
Yet...
On the chance that it wasn't, there was one simple fact that enticed him so greatly. If they did this 'heart merge', then Xehanort would be GONE. He would cease to exist as he was, but, so would he himself. Yet, sacrificing himself to eliminate Xehanort was a sacrifice he was willing to make. After all, he had told Xehanort that whatever the cost, he was willing to pay it.
The only question is... who would the 'apprentice' become? Xehanort reincarnated in a younger stronger body? Or a friend for Aqua and Ven, hopefully to lessen the blow they'd feel at his loss?
Or perhaps something else entirely?
He didn't know, but, as he stretched out his hand to take Xehanort's, he put his faith in his friends, and that one day, if this act didn't set things right, they would...
Apprentice Xehanort walked into his room, grumbling quietly to himself about Master Ansem's interference. He had to know and understand the matters of the heart, the man was a constant, aggravating roadblock in their experiments. He was planning to continue the experiments in the basement at some point with the other apprentices, but, perhaps... it would be for the best if the man were taken out of the picture and...
His breath left him, he staggered and half collapsed against his bed, crying out in pain and clutching his heart. Pain, enormous pain erupted from his chest, making him scream in agony. Memories, far to many conflicting memories and emotions started jumbling for control inside of his head. He staggered away, knocking over a chair, sweeping an arm to clear papers and books off a nearby bed stand, and slamming his head down on it.
He clutched his head and screamed. "WHO AM I?!"
Everything hurt so much, he just wanted it to stop!
He gave a roar and raised his hand into the air, a silver blade shaped like a key appearing in his hand. He acted on instinct, gripped it two handed, and drove the weapon into his chest, his heart...
Instantly the pain stopped, the key disappeared, and he fell to his knees. Memories began to leave him one by one, each scrap of knowledge he had just gained, trickling away, but the relief was to immense to make him care, yet... he started losing more and more... soon enough, he didn't even know where he was... or have even the slightest clue of who he was...
Three images played across his mind...
The first was of an old bald man and a young man that he thought looked unsettlingly to much like himself, both slowly blending together and fading away.
The second was of a strange kind of key like blade. There were two plain 'Keyblade' weapons interconnected over a strange silvery filigree. Out of the crossing of the two Keyblades extended a sharp blade of gold that actually resembled a sword instead of a key. Circling the outside of the picture were twenty spheres, thirteen dark, seven light. High above it, far in the sky beyond the clouds, was that of a heart shaped moon. Both the key, and the moon, felt so enticing to him...
The third, and final image was of two people. One, was a beautiful young blue haired woman, and a friendly young boy with spiky blonde hair. He felt his heart yearn for them as they extended their hands out for him to take. He so desperately wanted to be with them, to know who they were and what they meant to him...
He collapsed to the ground and whispered one final time before he passed out. "Who... am I...?"
Author's Notes:
Had a random fan-fiction idea of: 'What If Xehanort and Terra fully merged?' and decided to put it into writing. I don't know when I'm actually going to get to it, what with all the other stories I've got going at the moment, but I didn't want to let it sit and forget about it.
So basically in this AU: Xehanort and Terra are gone, 'apprentice Xehanort', overwhelmed by their merger, stabs himself and locks all of his/their memories, and creates a new blank slate, separate from apprentice Xehanort. He will become his own full person, separate yet intertwined with who both Terra and Xehanort were. How that changes things in lore, will remain to be seen.
Anyway, let me know what you think, and if this has already been done before or not.
Oh, and just for funzies, in the starcraft Archon voice, you can say 'THE MERGING IS COMPLETE!"