Disclaimer: I don't own SPN.
Well, at least I found my true calling: hunting down headcanons and turning them into ficlets ^_^
Even though God had up and left after the death of Jesus Christ, He hadn't abandoned His creations. Instead, He loved to kick back with snacks and a glass of whatever was popular at the time (He had a particular fondness for wine) and watch His creations as though they were part of a reality show on a device called television that they would invent later on in the twentieth century.
God's favourite 'program' was what He liked to call 'Match Made in Heaven'. He particularly liked shouting down at His humans, willing them desperately to find their soul mates and have the damn happy lives they deserved. But it was so frustrating! Why did He have to make humans so blind?
"No! Stop! That was your soul mate right there!" God yelled desperately as a handsome blond man in seventeenth century Britain swept straight past the pretty brunette lady without even a glance. "TURN AROUND, YOU BLIND FOOL! YOU MISSED HER!
London suffered the worst thunderstorm that night than it had in a century.
God christened His condition 'fanboyness', with 'fangirliness' as the appropriate female counterpart. One could trace this etymology back to the roots of 'fanatic' and the suffix '-dom', which He had smushed together to create 'fandom'. He thought this term appropriate; after all, He was rather fanatic about His creations finding their 'other halves'. He also named the condition of shipping as wanting particular people to get together and make babies and have 'hot sex', as He had heard once.
But honestly, God was wondering if becoming a fanboy had been such a good idea. None of His OTPs (One True Pairings, though Oh The Pain worked well) ever got together!
"UGH! WHY ARE ALL OF MY OTPS WALKING BY EACH OTHER WITHOUT NOTICING?"