This is my frist song fic thingy. its about twilight, which i geuss you already knew :). its set in edwards pespective. sorry if i screw it up at all, but this is how i imagine the edward in my head would act. all reviews appreciated nudge nudge
A/N: sadly i do not own twilight, by god i wish i did though. or the song...its a really good song, i recommend you go down load it (Y)
james blunt- carry you home
EPOV
i sat there watching her sleep, like i did every night. but tonight was different. it was the last time she would sleep, the last time i would hear her mumble my name in her dreams trying to figure out if she was dreaming or having a nightmare.we had married 3 weeks ago, and i was now staring into the always angelic face of Mrs.Edward Cullen...my Bella.
the radio was playing quietly beside her bed. we had been listening to her lullaby as she fell asleep pressed against me, but as she drifted away i switched it over to the radio and kissed her good night.
"This song is for all you love birds out there tonight" the radio man proclaimed. how cheap he made love sound, like it was an every day occurance. i wondered if he had ever felt this way...probably not if he thinks a song can sum up your love for another. even the lullaby couldnt do that, it was just a small symbol of how a felt, a small portion.
but as this song started playing, i listened. i hadnt heard it before, and i soothed me. of course i was thinking about bella, who else would be on my mind for eternity.
Trouble is her only friend and he's back again
Makes her body older than it really is
she worries too much. i try and protect her from all things that can physically harm her, but i cant protect her from herself. the problems she gets has now are due to me, to my family. but she seems to think theyr worth it. shes a magnet to all things bad...but the whole time we are both on this earth i will surrender myself to keep her in perfect condition.
And she says it's high time she went away
No ones got much to say in this town
Trouble is the only way is down, down, down
so eager for eternal damnation. shes under the impression that once she is transformed trouble wont be looking for her anymore. but she cant see that her being turned into a vampire is just the start of the trouble. of course i have told her all this, but she says she doesnt care about all the bad stuff, as long as im by her side. i know what she meens, i feel the same.
As strong as you were
Tender you go
I'm watching you breathing
For the last time
A song for your heart
But when it is quiet
I know what it means
And I'll carry you home
I'll carry you home
to strangers, she tries to make herself look tough. but they soon realise how gentle and timid she is when she blushes or trips over an unseen object...normally her own feet. oh god im going to wish her blushing. the scarlet blood rushing to the surface of her perfetly structured cheeks. that and the unbelievable power of love i can see burning in her deep brown eyes are the things im going to miss most in this world.
well those 2 lines are just too perculiar. i am watching her breather (as a human) for the last time. if course she can breathe as a vampire, but it wont be for the same purpose-to stay alive. shell be breathing to smell the blood of some injured creature. la tua cantante he heart sings to me all the time. i love the uneven beat of it. if my heart were still alive in the human way like hers is, then it would match her frenzied rate. when it stops beating, that frenzied heart rate of my own in my head will stop too. we decided that once she is transformed she will stay at my house until we move away for college. i cant believe this is it. it seems like iv known her for only a day, but wev been through so much and its nearly 2 years now. why now? i cant understand why she would give up her soul for me? to her, theres no argument. she would rather spend an eternity roaming this world...but aslong as i was by her side every step of the way. like i would want it any other way!
If she had wings she would fly away
And another day god will give her some
she is an angel. so radient and beautiful. she cannot get any more prettier, even in vampire form. i wish she wouldnt want this, i want to see her soar above in heaven, finally at peace. not having to worry about anything any more. but im still happy she does want this, in a selfish way. i get to keep her in my arms forever now.
And they're all born pretty
in New York City tonight
and someones little girl
was taken from the world tonight
under the Stars and Stripes
who am i to decide this? im taking her soul, the thing that makes her. oh how selfish i am. im taking her from everyone else in the world just so she can have me-so i can have her. i would hold this guilt inside for ever, she already knows i bear it. but never will i let it show. this poor girl has suffered because of me, and now she will suffer forever. she sees it as a good thing. its harder than she thinks.
I'm watching you breathing for the last time
A song for your heart
But when it is quiet
I know what it means
And I'll carry you home
guilt over whelmed my existance. i got up from the chair as the song drew to a close. as i quietly strode over to the radio and reached out a hand to switch it off, a dry tear rolled down my cheek. i could feel it there, but of course i had no tears to cry. i wish she didnt want this. id be happy to see her grow old beside me whislt i stayed youthful. i would still love her, i cant put into words how much i do.
"edward" i heard her mumble. i thought she was still dreaming.
"shhh" i whispered and stroked her forhead. it was warm. not for much longer though. how can this be happening?! she reached out her hand and grabbed my wrist. i looked down into her eyes, smouldering in the small amount of sun that was running in through the cracks in her curtains. iv never told this to her, i dont know how she would react. but she always dazzled me. she didnt have to look at me in any specific way. but as soon as i saw her face, and as soon as our gazes met, my non existant heart skips a beat and i feel...complete.
she tried to sit up. i reached my hand around her waist and sat down beside her, pulling her closer to me. i reached down and kissed her head, smoothing her hair down with my other hand.
"i love you" i whispered in a tone that if she werent half asleep she would have noticed had a sense of upset in it, a sense of despair. she stared up at me with inviting eyes.
"i love you too"
she snuggled up into my chest as i reclined and cradled her like a small child. and forever it would stay this way. me and her. her and me. as one. forever.