AN: So. Winona and Amanda. I don't think there is any audience for this, but I wanted to post it anyway. Amanda is recently divorced from Sarek, in what I think is a similar situation to Uhura and Spock in STID, without the almost death, but with Sarek unintentionally making Amanda feel like he didn't really care for her, and the two of them never talking it out, and then him thinking that if she wants to leave him, it might be the right thing for her even though it's breaking his heart, and like... yeah. It's kind of messy, and they are both heartbroken. And then Amanda meets Winona, who is like, a force of nature, and so different from Sarek, and also all kinds of awesome. (I can't write Winona as an abusive asshole, so in my headcanon she didn't know that Frank was abusing her sons and after the car-of-the-cliff stunt she came home, found out, and kicked Franks ass so hard would have left the continent in fear of her if he wasn't in prison. And then, she stayed home for a year and was awesome with Jim, who adores her, until Jim decided he wanted to try out this awesome schooling program.)
So... after this really long AN, here is the actual story!
Edit: The first part was missing! It's added now...
Amanda Grayson meets Winona Kirk on a sunny Friday afternoon. Well, Winona runs into her, actually. Complete with spilled coffee and everything. It's a little bit of a mess.
"I'm really sorry about this." The blonde woman says. Amanda thinks she's seen her before, somewhere, but she can't really place her. Which is kind of strange, because Amanda is really good at remembering faces, and she doesn't think she'd forget such a beautiful woman.
"Are you okay?" The woman asks, and Amanda realizes she has been staring for the past few moments. She shakes herself, takes stock of her skirt (only a few splashes on it, probably difficult to clean but that's what replicators are for) and her arm (there shouldn't be any burns, the coffee was already half cold), and then nods.
"I'm really sorry, I didn't look where I was going. Seems I got too used to people standing to the sides when I'm going somewhere. I'm Captain of a Starfleet ship, you know, so usually I don't really have to watch where I'm going. I'm Winona, Winona Kirk, by the way. May I buy you a new coffee?" The women, Winona Kirk (the Kelvin widow, and now Amanda remembers watching the memorial, with a young, defiant Winona Kirk and her baby son, the picture that is still shown sometimes when people want to feel patriotic) says with a breathtaking speed. For a moment, all Amanda can do is stare.
"It's alright, fine." She finally stutters, and curses herself in the next instant. She's a linguist, a famous, respected one, she speaks dozens of languages and has PhDs in seven of them, and yet, here she is, stuttering in the language that she grew up using.
"Oh come on, it's no trouble. You look like you could use something. Maybe a drink? I could use a drink." Winona (or should she call her Captain Kirk? She'd said that, before, that she is a Starfleet Captain, and most Captain's Amanda knows are extremely proud of their titles) says, handing Amanda a napkin to wipe the coffee of her arm before taking Amanda's hand and pulling her with her.
For a moment, Amanda can only stare at where their hands are joined, shocked at the casual contact. On Vulcan, this would have been a punishable offense, and Amanda wonders if it's the years on her ex-husbands planet that have made her skittish. But then she shakes herself. No, this is not normal, she thinks, not even on earth. This seems to be something that is entirely Winona Kirk.
"A coffee would be nice." She says, finally, and Winona grins. It's a pretty grin. A very pretty grin, mischievious and clever and with bright blue eyes that only barely hide old wounds.
"Sure you don't want a drink? A drink would help you relax. And I know this awesome bar..." Is Amanda imagining it, or is Winona Kirk flirting with her? She must be imagining it. To little adult human contact in the last few years. She just needs to have a little fling with someone, preferably without Spock ever knowing, and she'll be able to handle situations like this much better.
"I can't. My son is coming home from school soon, and … I don't think having a drink before discussing his homework would be beneficial." She almost, almost blushes. But maybe the years on Vulcan did her good, after all, because she doesn't.
"Beneficial?" Winona snorts. "Interesting word choice. But I know what you mean. My Jimmy is a freaking genius. I mean, both my boys are, but Jimmy is on another level. When he really starts talking about something that interests him, if that something isn't engineering and/or machines, I'm very lost very fast."
They've reached a cafe. Winona pulls Amanda in, and Amanda can't help but notice that Winona still hasn't let go of her hand. It should be disconcerting, she thinks, but it's actually kind of nice. Different, but nice.
There's a table by the window, and the moment they sit down a waitress materializes next to them and hands them the menu. Winona doesn't even bother looking at hers, just smiles at the waitress.
"Just a black coffee, dear. But wait until my friend here, wait, what's your name?" It seems that Winona has only now noticed that Amanda has not introduced herself, yet. She looks at her expectantly, and this time, Amanda does feel herself blushing.
"Amanda. Amanda Grayson." She says, and she's proud of herself because at least she's not stuttering. Which is a really low bar, because she remembers people being terrified of her on Vulcan, and she decides that this is definitively on Winona, and not on her.
"And I'll take a black coffee, too." Amanda says, and hands the waitress the card back. The waitress, whose name tag identifies her as Sara, nods, and leaves.
"Amanda Grayson... I think I've heard that name before." Winona says, and scrunches her nose a bit. It should not be this adorable, Amanda thinks, but it is. "Weren't you then linguistic genius who revolutionized the way Vulcan is taught to Earth students?"
Well, at least Winona doesn't remember her as the ex wife of the Vulcan Ambassador who must be the only woman who's ever managed to have a truly ugly divorce with a Vulcan. Small mercies.
"I wouldn't say I revolutionized it, but I did work on it, yes." Amanda says, and Winona grins again. That grin is totally unfair. And Amanda really needs to get that pend up energy out of her system, because she is pretty sure Winona is not intending to flirt with her.
"My Jimmy really liked the new way it's taught, anyway. He likes Vulcan as a language, says it's just as logical as machines. Which, honestly, I don't really see, but to him it apparently makes sense, so I assume he's right." Talking a mile a minute is apparently normal with Winona. It's kind of charming, Amanda thinks.
"He sounds like a special little boy." Amanda says, and thinks of her own special little boy, probably buried in his PADD right now, studying all sorts of things. She should make him plomek soup tonight, she knows he missed it, no matter how much he insists that preferring one food to another, equally nutritious one to be illogical.
"He is. I miss him quite a lot, to be honest. He's not here, currently. He's with his aunt and uncle on Tarsus IV. That's one of the small colonies, with an amazing schooling program. He begged me to let him go, and he seems really happy there, but by the stars I miss him." That would explain why Winona can be Captain of a starship despite having a son that can't be older than twelve, Amanda realizes. But Tarsus IV is quite a distance from here, too far for personal com calls. Amanda doesn't think she could stand to have her son so far away from her.
"I've heard of the program. My son considered it, but in the end he chose to continue study as he does now. It's probably because of the divorce, to be honest. I feel bad, because my son shouldn't have to accommodate my life, but..." She usually isn't this open with strangers, or near strangers, anyway, but Winona just shared something incredibly personal, and Amanda can't help but return the favor.
"Oh, divorces are ugly. Even in the best case scenario, and I think we both know how often that happens. What did your ex do to give you full custody? Do you need me to beat him up?" Winona sounds absolutely serious about it, and for a moment, Amanda amuses herself with the mental image of Winona Kirk, armed with a Starfleet issued phaser, attacking a completely bewildered Sarek. Then she shakes her head.
"We just... didn't fit. And I don't have full custody, but my ex decided that it is more logical for Spock, that's our son, to visit him on Vulcan for three months at a time every year than for us to travel the whole time or for him to move here indefinitely. So, yeah." Amanda holds her breath, waits for the judging to start. She just admitted to having married a Vulcan. She remembers very well the amount of shit her friends gave her for that, and how even her parents had to force their smiles at the wedding.
"Better to end it than to let it harm the kid, is what I say." Winona tells her, and there's compassion in her eyes, as well as something like... grief, or guilt. Amanda considers asking, but decides that they probably don't know each other well enough for that.
"The divorce is recent, I guess?" Winona asks as their coffees arrive. The cups are very nice, Amanda notices, and the coffee smells amazing. She'd forgotten how much she missed good coffee.
"Not that recent. I mean, our split is not that recent. But it was finalized recently, and things are a bit chaotic right now. I have a flat in the city, but I want to move away from... some people here, so I tried to get a place to live that's not here, but there are a lot less fitting places then I thought there'd be. That's what I was doing this afternoon, meeting with a potential landlord, but I honestly wasn't impressed." The man had tried to tell her that the house he offered was the best she'd ever get, when in reality it was little more than two rooms and a kitchen that would need immediate fixing.
"You could go to the farm." Winona said. "My farm. Not that there is much farming to be done, but George's grandparents were farmers, and the house is nice. It's rather remote, so I'm not sure how you'd like it, but Sam goes to a school on Mars, Jimmy's on Tarsus, and I ship out again on Monday. You could live there at least until you found something more permanent."
"I … I can't..." And great, Amanda is stuttering again. It's definitively Winona, not her. Who offers a person they've known for all of ten minutes to go live at their home? Even if it is empty?
"Oh bullshit. Of course you can. It can't be easy here in San Fran, with so many expectations on being the Vulcan Ambassador's ex wife, and in Riverside nobody would know that. Nobody knowing you means no expectations. You can figure yourself out, and then think about how you want to go on." So Winona had figured out the whole Ambassador thing. But without judging. That is... kind of awesome.
"You've known me for ten minutes." Amanda says, but she can't help but imagine it. Riverside sounds very rural, and maybe Spock would have problems in school, but he'll probably have those problems everywhere. The curse of being a child of a Vulcan father and a human mother. And for nobody to bother her about her ex... that sounds a bit like paradise.
"I'm a good judge of character." Winona says, then immediately winces. "Usually. And it's not like I'm giving you custody of my kids, just the empty house." Something flashes over her eyes as she says it, something dark, and guilty, but Amanda doesn't ask. Winona is not shy, if she wants Amanda to know, she'll tell her.
"It's... an amazing offer. I'm honored. I don't want to impose, but..." She's only sort of stuttering now, and at least this time she's remembering her manners. She's definitively blaming it on Winona, and her incredible presence, but maybe Amanda is getting a hang of how to deal with it.
"I could show you around this later? Or no, you said your kid comes home. Tomorrow? We could beam out, no need for a shuttle, that would take ages. I hope you don't mind beaming, my ma did. It was terrible, she got sick every single time." Winona is grinning again, and Amanda does absolutely not hold her breath.
"Beaming is not a problem." She says, thinking. "I think I'd like to bring Spock, if that's okay? He should have a say in where we live. And of course we'll have to discuss rent and all of that."
"You don't have to pay rent, Amanda." Winona says, rolling her eyes fondly. "Nobody lives there, you'd be doing me a favor if you made sure the place is still in one piece, really."
"I will pay rent. I like you, but if I live at your place, we should do it the right way. I want to get back on my feet, and that includes not relying on everybody else." Amanda's voice is firm, and this feels more like her, more like the woman she likes to think she is.
Winona cocks her head, and looks at her. Then she smiles. "Okay. But I'm not having you pay an unreasonable amount, and we'll definitively count the fact that you'll basically be keeping the house for me while I'm gone in the whole thing."
Amanda considers arguing, but a part of her that sounds suspiciously like Sarek says that Winona does not seem like she's going to be swayed further on this topic, and anyway, it would be more logical to discuss this after Amanda has seen the house, given that it is no use to discuss something that might never be relevant.
She drinks the last sip of her coffee, just as her PADD pings to remind her that Spock will be home within the next ten minutes. She hadn't realized that it's that late already, but then again, she thinks that Winona is someone who can quite literally make one forget time.
"If you give me your com number, I can call you tomorrow. Would ten in the morning be okay for you?" She asks, pulling out her PADD. Winona does the same.
"Ten is perfect. I warn you: It's not going to be all that cleaned up, I never really got the hang out of housework, but it shouldn't be too bad. I don't know how important cleanliness is to you, but my ma was really stuck on it, and I guess I just kind of unconsciously wanted to be the opposite of that." Amanda saves her com number, and the waitress comes back.
"Do you pay together or not?" She asks, smiling pleasantly. Amanda reaches for her card, but Winona shakes her head.
"I'll pay for both of us. No, Amanda, don't argue this, I spilled your coffee, this is only fair. Here's my credit information." Winona says to the waitress, who Amanda realizes is the same one as before. Sarah.
"Will you be home in time?" Winona asks her. Amanda nods. She lives rather close by, but she'll need to go now if she wants to change before Spock arrives. She stands up.
"I'll com you." Winona says, standing up too, and before Amanda knows what's happening the other woman hugs her. She smells like engine oil, Amanda thinks, and then Winona's pulling away again. Amanda is definitively not flustered.
"I'll see you tomorrow." She says, and Winona smiles blindingly. Amanda can't help but smile back. And if it takes her a bit longer to come home than usual, well, that's nothing anybody needs to know.
The next morning, Amanda wakes up at eight am. She always does. Her son is already up, as always. She can hear him walk around in the kitchen, probably preparing breakfast for them. He's sweet like that.
After a quick sonic shower, she stands in front of her drawer and wonders what to wear. None of her Vulcan robes, of course. Maybe that nice green dress? It's old, back from before she was married, but it should still fit. Then again, this is not a formal meeting. This is going to see a … well, friend? … and looking at the house. And possibly making arrangements to move in there for a bit.
Maybe the blue skirt? It's a long one, swishy and with a nice, bright blue pattern on it. It makes her look young, too young? But no. She's not old, and anyway, she'll be there with her fourteen year old son. There's no possible way for her to seem too young.
… And now she's obsessing over her cloths. Maybe it's just the adjustment, after all, on Vulcan, she just wore robes, and never truly wondered what they looked like. Definitively just the adjustment.
She finally puts on the skirt and a nice, black blouse, and goes to meet her son. He is wearing the jeans she bought him, and is trying very hard not to look uncomfortable. It is a bit of a strange sight, but she thought that this way, he might not be bullied as much as he was on Vulcan.
"I wish you a good morning, Spock." She says, laying her hand on his head for a short moment. It's as close to a kiss on the forehead as she is going to get, and he gives her a small smile that makes all her worries seem inconsequential.
"A good morning to you too, Mother." He says, offering her a coffee. It's not the Vulcan kind, she notes, and thanks him. The table is set with lots and lots of fruit, including a nice red apple. Amanda smiles, and takes it.
"We have about one and a half hour until we have to depart to meet Winona." She tells her son. You don't have to come if you'd prefer to stay here, but as the point of the meeting is to determinate whether the house is sufficient for us to live in for a few weeks or months until we find something more permanent, it would be useful to have you there to see if you consider it acceptable." She's talking Vulcan again, even if she uses Standard. She knows her son likes it that way, when everything is clear and there are as little ambiguities as possible.
"It is logical to accompany you, Mother. It would be interesting to meet this woman that's offered us a place to live at at such short notice." Translation: He can barely contain his curiosity as to why she is considering to accept this offer when she has shot down the last ones. She can understand that.
"You can wear Vulcan robes to the meeting if that is more comfortable for you. I know you dislike jeans and sweatshirts." Amanda tells him. Spock looks at her for a moment, then shakes his head.
"As we will live on Earth for quite some time, it is only logical for me to start getting used to the typical attire here. And given that I, too, am half human, it would be illogical for me to prefer Vulcan clothing." He sounds too old for his fourteen years, but Amanda has long since accepted that.
"Alright. But just know, I'm proud of you no matter what you wear, or how you choose to act. You are my son, and I love you very much, okay?" Sarek would have considered this an illogical statement, given that a mother loving her son is only logical and therefore unnecessary to verbalize, but Amanda is human, and she thinks that Spock definitively needs to hear this. And the way Spock looks at her, she is right.
Amanda makes sure they are perfectly on time. Actually, she makes sure they arrive at the meeting point she and Winona discussed over coms yesterday five minutes early. Spock says nothing. He is wearing a cap that covers his ears. Winona is reminded of the scarfs she used to wrap around her head on Vulcan, always making sure that her human ears aren't the first thing people notice about her, and suddenly, she feels guilty for taking Spock to a planet where he feels the need to cover his ears. But then again, she thinks, it's not as if Spock was really accepted by the Vulcan children either.
Winona is five minutes late, hurrying down the streets and shouting an apology before she is even properly there. Then she pulls Amanda into a hug, her blonde hair brushing over Amanda's cheek, and offers Spock a near flawless taal. Spock, after a moment of surprise, returns the gesture, and Winona grins at him.
"It's nice to meet you, Spock. I hope you'll like the house." She says in a soft tone that makes it impossible not to remember that Winona is a mom too, and something warm blossoms in Amanda's chest.
"Let's go!" Winona says, and starts walking towards the public transporter. There's thankfully no queue, and within few seconds they stand on a small town square. It's noticeably warmer than in San Francisco, and Amanda is glad she chose the skirt instead of the overly formal dress.
"It's not that far from here, we can walk. And I can show you the city while we go, so win-win." Winona says, and starts talking about Riverside. Amanda had looked it up yesterday, after meeting Winona, and learned that Riverside is one of the big construction sites for Starfleet, and that apart from that, it is a rather rural place, with mostly construction workers and farmers living here.
Winona points out the school (which Spock most likely won't attend, given that he is following the Vulcan syllabus instead of the human one), the post office (which Amanda probably will get to know well, if she moves here, considering her translation work and the often physical copies of the books she likes), a couple bars (Amanda already knows she won't go anywhere near those after dusk) and a the only local restaurant that serves offworld food. Spock looks around, curious but restraint, and Amanda thinks he could like it here.
At least it's warmer than New York, where Amanda grew up.
Then they leave the town, walking over a deserted road between the fields. It's peaceful, almost like in some of the old movies Amanda watched when she was younger. Winona has a sort of wistful expression on her face, as though she is recalling better times, and Amanda wonders if she is thinking of her late husband.
"There it is!" Winona says finally, pointing towards a nice looking little house a bit off the street. It looks kind of sweet, in that old movie way, and very human. Amanda shoots a look to her son, but Spock just seems intrigued.
"It looks nice." Amanda says, because she suddenly realizes that for the last twenty minutes, Winona has more or less exclusively done the talking. It's not her smoothest compliment, but Winona smiles.
"Jimmy and me renovated it a bit before he went to Tarsus. There's a couple places where it's obvious it wasn't done by professionals, but it's way better than before, and Jimmy loved it."
After a short walk through the house, which is clean but slightly untidy, in that typically human homey kind of way, Amanda looks at her son. Spock is staring at some holos. She wants to tell them that humans consider it impolite to stare at private holos, even when they are displayed like this, but her breath catches when she actually sees the holo.
George Kirk, the hero of the Federation, beaming down at her, his arm around a young, obviously pregnant Winona, a little boy of maybe three years sitting in front of them. It must have been taken shortly before the last journey of the Kelvin.
It feels very, very private, and Amanda turns away, to find Winona looking at her. There's grief shadowing Winona's eyes, and Amanda thinks it should feel wrong, to see someone as vibrant as Winona this sad, but somehow it doesn't. The grief was there the whole time, she realizes, just overshadowed by charisma and a determination to be alive, to be okay.
Neither of them says anything, but Amanda takes Winona's hand when they leave the room.
They see Winona of when she has to report back to her ship. She won't be far, she says. Apparently, Starfleet Command likes having a number of ships close to Earth and Vulcan, it's main worlds, to scare of any glory seeking Klingons and Romulans.
"Just com when you have any questions about the house." Winona says, already dressed in her gold tunic. She's wearing the less used female variant of the uniform, the one with the pants. Somehow, Amanda can't even picture Winona wearing the dress.
"We'll be fine, Winona. You do us a great favor." Amanda says, but she's smiling. She has a feeling that Winona likes knowing that the house isn't empty, even if it's not her own family that's living there.
"Indeed, Captain Kirk. It is very kind of you to allow us to stay at your home." Spock says, his hands behind his back. He is still wearing the jeans Amanda got him, but the cap is gone. Maybe he will adjust better than Amanda had thought.
"It's my pleasure." Winona says, smiling. She gives the taal to Spock, who returns the gesture solemnly, and then goes to hug Amanda. This time, Amanda is somewhat more prepared for it, and hugs her friend back.
"You can call even if everything's okay, you know?" Winona says with a wink, and then she's gone, disappearing into a crowd of other Starfleet officers.
Amanda smiles. She has a feeling that there is somewhat of an adventure ahead.