Jack: Sir?
Hammond: Yes.
Jack: Permission to speak freely?
Hammond: Yes.
Jack: Sir, frankly, the people are getting board.
Hammond: What do you mean? There have been lots of incoming wormholes and missions lately.
Jack: That's the point! Offworld activation, iris open, iris closed, Gou'uld take over, and don't get me started on the tok'ra!
Hammond: I don't follow. That sounds perfectly exiting to me!
Jack: That's because it's not your job. Believe it or not, saving the world over, and over, and over, and over...
Hammond: Is this going to take long?
Jack: No sorry. I have an idea.
Hammond: Oh dear.
Jack: Normally I'd agree, but this is a good one.
Hammond: And you won't agree to shut up until you tell me, will you.
Jack: Exactly.
Hammond: Go ahead.
Jack: Drum roll please!...
Hammond: O'Neill
Jack: American Idol!
Hammond: ...
Jack: Well, technically, Stargate Idol!
Hammond: ...
Jack: Say something.
Hammond: ...
Jack: Ok.... Well?
Hammond: ...
Jack: I'd could be a judge, you, and maybe... Walter, yeah, Walter. Then, the winner can pick between picking one person to do all their work for one week or having two weeks off.
Hammond: Not all of us can sing.
Jack: Ok, it can be Stargate talents!
Hammond: Fine.
Jack: YES! ... I mean, thanks.
Hammond: Now will you leave me alone?
Jack: Bye sir.
***
Jack: Well Daniel, the tights were an ... interesting, addition. But I don't think that swan lake is a very good talent.
Hammond: Well, it would be better if you didn't try to do it to a rap song.
*Walter falls off chair*
***
Jack: Carter, it's great that you can sing opera. I think that you're the best we've had so far! *Stands clapping like crazy*
Hammond: I don't think so, sorry.
Walter: Yeah... Moving on.
***
*Janet walks out with 10 HUGE nettles*
Jack: NEXT
Hammond: NEXT
*Walter falls out of chair...again*
***
Apophis and Hathor walk onto stage and start to sing 'Breaking Free'
Hammond: You've got to be kidding me. They're the best act so far.
Jack: Exept Carter.
*Walter falls out of chair again...again*
THE END