Author's note: Whoo! First mass effect Fanfic. Be gentle, plz, and this takes place almost immediately after the suicide mission. The plot's still hazy, and this is mostly going to be humor/non story relevant, so bear with me. :P Now on to the story! :D
Chapter 1: Bare Necessities
"Shepard, you can't turn your back on me! Think of everything Cerberus has done for you, you can't-"
"Joker, lose this channel." Commander Shepard cut off the Illusive Man. Hell, after what he had been through not an hour ago, he didn't care about what the Illusive Man had to say; he had beaten the odds, coming out with his whole team intact after assaulting the Collectors' home base. He was bruised, bleeding, and dead tired, but he was victorious. After destroying the base, much to the Illusive Man's disappointment, Commander John Shepard set to work severing all ties with Cerberus, even vowing to remove the logo on the damaged Normandy.
Shepard still stood in the briefing room, mulling over in his mind what he would do next. Maybe I can finally get some shore leave, unlike last time- Shepard's thoughts screeched to a halt when he thought back to his fight against Saren, and his old crew; especially Ashley Williams. He wiped his face with his hand as his mind wandered back to their reunion on Horizon.
What was wrong with me? It seemed like I just couldn't find the right words; Ash didn't trust me, even after all we'd been though. The memory of her cold refusal to join his team still stung in his heart. It had been nearly two months since he had gotten her email. At least she isn't as angry as I thought she was. Shepard thought to himself.
As he exited the briefing room and entered the CIC, it was clear what needed to be done. This place is a mess! Shepard mentally exclaimed. The galaxy map flickered in and out of focus, his private terminal was in two pieces; one floated listlessly in the sea of wires that made up the sides of the map, while the other appeared to be in the elevator. The Commander scrubbed his face with his hands, then turned on his intercom to the bridge.
"Joker; get us into the Citadel for repairs. If anyone needs me, I'll be in the med bay."
"Aye aye, captain." Came the pilot's zealous reply, the sweetness of victory evident in his voice.
As he arrived at the crew quarters, Shepard had to marvel at how inanely ineffective all the upgrades to the Normandy seemed to be. The place looked like a giant hurricane had hit it. One with teeth. As he made his way to the med bay to check up on his crew, Shepard encountered the ever-collected Thane and decided to chat.
"So, Thane, what did you think about how we handled the last mission?" Shepard questioned, his arms shifting to clasp behind his back, as was habit.
"Commander, do you really think I need to convey the degree of our victory? We did what no one believed we could, and returned unscathed. It has filled me with joy that I helped save human lives. I do wonder, though, how will you fund your operation against the Reapers? The Illusive Man was your driving force, and the Council hardly seems to care." Thane replied, his eye ridge quirking at the last sentence. Shepard let out an amused chuckle.
"Thane, do you know what the interest from two years is on nine million credits?" Shepard asked, a sly grin adorning his face. Thane merely blinked, issued a croaky "Shepard", then left for the life support room.
Shepard palmed his way into the medical bay to see Doctor Chakwas busily patching up the few wounded in the fight with the Collectors. Amongst them were Jacob, Miranda, Garrus, and Jack.
"Hey! Get your hands off of me. I don't need a fucking doctor!" Jack complained, yet still allowed Chakwas to apply bandages to her tattooed arm, burnt by a Collector particle beam.
"Hey, Shepard! Good to see you're still kickin'. I thought you might have bit the bullet when that platform got you." Jacob called as he hopped off the bed, his normal armored uniform replaced with a starched medical gown. He cringed in pain at the last few words, clutching his stomach. Doctor Chakwas verbally berated him for his actions.
"You shouldn't be up and about, Jacob. While you did get us back to the ship in one piece, you should know not to disobey the doctor. Now sit." Jacob shrugged sheepishly to Shepard, then laid back down onto the medical bed. Joker interrupted the conversation.
"We've just passed back through the Omega-4 Relay. ETA to the Citadel sixteen hours."
"Alright crew. We're headed to the Citadel to dock the Normandy for repairs. That means we get some shore leave. Scratch that. Once the repairs are down, we are going on vacation." Shepard announced, lowering himself onto the side of one of the beds. He looked around at his crew. "Any requests?"
The five looked from one to the other, finally deciding that the Commander was actually serious.
"I say we spill some drinks on the Citadel, Commander. I think the crew deserves that much for now." Jacob piped up, pushing himself up on the medical bed with his arm, only to have Doctor Chakwas push him back down with an 'oomph'.
"That'll do for now. You all heard Joker. We'll be at the Citadel in sixteen hours, so rest up and meet at the Darkstar at 2300 standard." Shepard replied, leaving the med bay. As the doors closed behind him, he thought about what he had to do during the interim between their position and the Citadel. He rolled his shoulders as he walked towards the elevator, his cracked and battered hardsuit protesting loudly. He groaned as he realized his armor was still on.
Maybe I can finally get this thing repaired along with the Normandy, Shepard thought, looking down at the seared front of his armor, small chips missing, and red spotting his gauntlets.
Finally, he got to his quarters, the doors opening with a slight whoosh. He keyed open the door to his quarters proper, and his eyes widened. It looked like when the Occuli attacked, most of the damage had been done to his room. Fish lay scattered around the room, dead. His bed was in shambles, pieces spread across the room. All of his model ships had been broken free of their glass case by his terminal, and Spartacus the Warrior Hamster was nowhere to be found.
He heaved a long sigh and soaked all of this in. He finally opted to just remove and store his armor, then get some work done on his barely functioning terminal.
It was going to be a long sixteen hours.
Author's Note: So what did you think? I thought that would do for a little teaser chapter, and there will be hopefully more to come. Reviews are much appreciated, and any suggestions taken note of. Until next time, The Amazing Soup.