A/N: So this was originally a multi-chaptered story when I first wrote it but...hehe. Yeah. I couldn't commit to it and I lost the three pre-written chapters I wrote after this prologue. So. Yeah, this will just be a one-shot. Re-editing this story made me want to play DA:O again! Let me know what you folks think~!
Foreordained
The room is eerily quiet and painfully cold, as Elissa finds it. Her once dainty and smooth hands are clasped together on her lap, eyes gleaming, presumably, with tears. But they do not fall as they should. Her chest aches, making it hard for her to breath. A million thoughts fill her mind; most of them are flashbacks of what happened in the past.
Her right hand unconsciously lands on her abdomen and then she almost bursts into tears upon her recent discovery. The unsettling mood swings, the random odd cravings, and the worrisome morning sicknesses…
Her breath is caught in her throat, her chest tightening. She immediately grips her dress, taking slow, deep breaths in an attempt to calm herself. Yet the ache and tightening of her chest persists. It is suffocating her.
The Landsmeet.
She is reminded of the Landsmeet. She remembers the events quite clearly in her head. It latches onto her, burning in her mind like flames as it leaves scorch marks in its wake. Back then, she had won, but the success is both a curse and a gift.
The tears finally fall down her cheeks and the sobs finally escape from pale lips that were once full and red as a rose. She almost chokes as she is reminded of another memory and all she can do is cry quietly and pathetically to herself.
Although it is far too late, she realizes that she has lost everything.
Elissa walked to the royal palace with proud struts and held her chin high. Alistair, who was both her fellow Warden and lover, accompanied her. It was only the two of them who ventured to the royal palace, as she saw it fit that they, the Grey Wardens, deal with Loghain themselves. The matter had always just been between Loghain and the Grey Wardens.
Eamon had just finished his speech once they entered and upon the sight of them, gave them a curt nod. The accusing and frightened stares of the nobles immediately fell on them upon their entrance. Everything fell into silence. It was so quiet that even a pin dropping could be heard.
Finally, the silence dissipated once Loghain approached them, his royal and faithful guards by his side. He yelled accusations their way, bellowing the blame on them, even cursing and insulting their Order. Yet, in spite of his harsh words and cruel accusations, she remained unfazed. Even Alistair did not say anything, aware that there would be no point in carelessly yelling out accusations as well. They were to act like civilized people even though this man in front of them was the reason Ferelden was slowly crumbling.
With a cool and composed façade, she took a step towards Loghain. She was careful not to show an opening, a disadvantage on her way. She was a Cousland and now she was ready to show that Loghain should have never crossed with them.
She would bring back honour to her family.
"Orlais is not the threat here, Loghain," she said with much fierceness as he. "The Blight is."
That earned her the support of Arl Wulff, as Elissa would learn later. Arl Wulff was the Arl of West Hills and she remembered him mentioning that he had lost his sons and his darling to the Blight.
"The Blight is indeed real, Wulff," Loghain said, eyes narrowing at her way.
'The fool finally realizes this then, huh?' She thought dryly to herself.
"But do we need Grey Wardens to fight it? They claim that they alone can end the Blight, yet they failed spectacularly against the darkspawn at Ostagar."
She heard a low growl from Alistair but she brought a hand up to stop him from saying anything.
"Let him speak," she whispered lowly to him. "And let me handle this."
When he said nothing, she took it as a yes from him but did not look at him for confirmation.
"They ask to bring with them four legions of chevaliers. And once we open our borders to the Chevaliers, can we really expect them to simply return from whence they came?"
"What a fool," Alistair vehemently mumbled under his breath. "He still thinks that the Orlesians are out there to invade Ferelden once again."
'I don't blame him,' she thought inwardly. Loghain's fear towards an Orlesian invasion was understandable for he experienced their cruelties firsthand. It was obvious that the man loved his country and would do anything to protect it; however, his continued ignorance of the Blight's threat did not excuse the way he was acting right now. He was the reason why Ferelden was at its bad state.
"You fear that we will fall as slaves to the Orlesians once again," she said, abruptly interrupting his speech. "Yet you sold your own people into slavery to fund your war. A bit hypocritical, don't you think?"
There were gasps around the room and hushed whispers upon the mention of this.
"What's this?" A noble, whom Elissa recognized as Bann Sighard, said. His voice was filled with incredulity and shock. "There is no slavery in Ferelden. Explain yourself this instant!" He demanded angrily to Loghain.
"There is no saving the Alienage," Loghain replied, far too calm for her tastes. She narrowed her eyes at him, disgusted that he would do such a thing and even had the nerve to claim that the Alienage could not be saved.
"Damage from the riot has yet to be repaired. There are bodies still rotting in their homes. It is not a place I would send my worst enemy. There is no chance of holding it if the Blight comes here," he explained before his gaze fell on her once again.
"Despite what you may think, Warden, I have done my duty. Whatever my regrets may be for the elves, I have done what was needed for the good of Ferelden."
She was tempted to spit on him. Those elves they saved from slavery just in time were beaten to a bloody pulp, even killed if they resisted. Yet, this man claimed that it was for the good of Ferelden?
A dragonbone-gloved hand fell on her shoulder, making her look away from the blasphemous teyrn. Alistair looked at her with a curt smile on his face. It was an attempt to calm her knowing that her patience was about to snap. She gave him a small smile of her own, understanding that under such circumstances, she must remain calm.
"Of course," she finally said after she had composed herself once again from the murderous thoughts she had in her head. Out of habit, she had her arms cross in her chest, eyes narrowing slightly.
"If slavery is a duty you must do in order to protect Ferelden," she said with such mockery. "Does permitting Howe into torturing citizens for the better good of Ferelden as well?"
Just the mere mention of that malicious murderer made her blood boil. She was reminded of her family, brutally murdered in their own home while their forces were weakened. She was reminded of the bloody bodies of her nephew and sister-in-law, swimming in their own blood. Even the bloodied and gravely wounded image of her father stuck in her head as she was forced to leave him and her mother in their deaths. It still made her angry even though Howe died by her hands. Her family did not deserve such treachery. They didn't deserve to die at all.
"Howe took my only son!" Bann Sighard's voice had snapped her out of her reverie. "The things done to him…some are beyond any healer's skill."
"Howe was a grown man responsible for his own actions. He will answer to the Maker for his crimes, as we all must. But enough of this. I have a question for you, Warden: What have you done with my daughter?"
Now she raised an eyebrow towards him, puzzled by his question.
"And just what are you talking about?" She asked with a raised eyebrow.
"You took my daughter—our queen—by force, killing her guards in the process. What arts have you employed to keep her? Does she even live?"
"I believe I can speak for myself."
Everyone looked at the source of the voice and lo and behold, there stood the current Queen of Ferelden, Anora Mac Tir Theirin, the last of Elissa's pawns.
"Lords and Ladies of Ferelden, hear me. My father is no longer the man you know. This man is not the hero of Riverdale. This man turned his troops aside and refused to protect your king as he fought bravely against the darkspawn. This man seized Cailan's throne before his body was cold and locked me away so I could not reveal his treachery. I would have already been killed, if not for this Grey Warden."
Yes, everything was going as she had planned, Elissa thought. With most noble's support on her side, as well as Anora's, it was assured that she had won the Landsmeet. She'd prove to Anora that it was not only she that was good at manipulation. It might've escaped the current Queen's thought but Elissa, too, was a noble. She knew how to lie and be a politician if she wanted to. Those tutors and lessons Aldous had taught (and bored) her did not go to waste.
"The queen speaks the truth," Elissa concurred, trying her best not to smirk.
"So the Warden's influence has poisoned even your mind, Anora? I wanted to protect you from this…" It was only meant for Anora to be heard, but this, however, did not escape Elissa. Her suspicions about Anora lying were, in fact, true. Loghain would never kill his only daughter.
"My lords and ladies, our land has been threatened before. It has been invaded, and lost, and one times beyond counting. We Fereldans have proven we will never truly be conquered so long as we are united. We must not let ourselves be divided now. Stand with me, and we shall defeat even the Blight itself!"
But Loghain's pleas were for naught for everyone's support fell on her, the Grey Wardens. It was to be expected, really. Elissa knew how to play this politician game of theirs and she dared not to lose.
"The Landsmeet is against you, Loghain," she said with a voice full of authority and superiority. "Step down gracefully at once."
For a moment, shock spread all over his face. He could not believe it; the Landsmeet was against him! After all he had done for this country, they turned their backs on him?! In a snap, he recovered and turned to the nobles with an accusing finger. Renewed anger and rage replaced the shock that was just on his face just a moment ago.
"Traitors! Which of you stood against the Orlesian emperor when his troops flattened your fields and raped your wives?" He swiftly turned to Eamon who stood on the balcony. "You fought with us once, Eamon. You cared about this land once! Before you got too old and fat and content to even see what you risk. None of you deserve what happens here! None of you have spilled blood for this land the way I have! How dare you judge me!"
"Then we shall settle this honorably," Elissa spoke up when no one said anything. "Call off your men."
"Then let us end this," he agreed, easily understanding her implication, as he looked at her sternly. "I suppose we both knew it would come to this. When we first met at Ostagar, I would have never thought so. But Ostagar seems like it happened in another lifetime, to someone else. A man is made by the quality of his enemies. Maric told me that once. I wonder if it's more a compliment to you or me…"
For a moment, it seemed as if he was reminiscing of the past as the look on his face softened. It was in that moment Elissa noticed how old Loghain truly was. She could see a noble and respectable man, a man who would sacrifice even himself for the better of his country. It was a shame, really, that he would turn into an evil villain. Maybe, in all honesty, that in spite of all these cruel things he had been doing, he really did mean to do it for Ferelden. But why turn to despicable things?
In a blink of an eye, the stern look returned, traces of his reminiscing gone.
"Enough! Let the Landsmeet declare the terms of the duel."
"It shall be fought according to tradition: a test of arms in single combat until one party yields. And we who are assembled will abide by the outcome," Bann Alfstanna of the Waking Seas announced.
"Will you face me yourself or have you a champion?" The Teyrn asked her.
She was about to reply, ready to declare herself as his adversary. However, she did not have a chance as Alistair stepped forward.
"Let me fight him," he said. "I owe this much to Duncan."
She gave him a calculating look and then looked back to Loghain.
"If you must then," she said as she stepped back. "Be careful," she whispered, dropping her civil and cold façade.
"Hey, now," Alistair whispered back playfully. "Give me some credit, will ya?" But before she could reply, he had gone serious as he glared at Loghain with such intensity.
"I'll be your opponent, Loghain," he said seriously.
"Then let us test the mettle of our would-be king. Prepare yourself."
Everyone stepped back once the two faced each other.
Elissa stayed close to the dueling match but made sure she was far enough not to disturb them.
The two rounded each other carefully, hands on the hilt of their swords. They were ready to draw it anytime now. And then, in a blink of an eye, both drew their swords. There was a clash of metal and metal, the sound resounding in the Landsmeet Chamber. There were loud gasps but no one dared to speak. Everyone watched the duel carefully, anticipating who would win.
Although Elissa knew Alistair would win, a tiny part of her worried that he might hurt himself. She noticed that he was rigid because of all the anger he had pent up for this man.
'Calm down, Alistair,' she thought, as if she was communication telepathically to him. 'You won't win this way. You're a warrior; you should know better than this.'
Loghain pushed Alistair with his shield, causing the young Theirin to fall on the ground. She flinched but did not move a muscle to help him. He could handle this; she knew he could.
Alistair tried his best to lift himself up quickly, blocking Loghain's attacks with his shield. When he found an opening to the older man's attacks, he swung his own sword, blocking the Hero of Riverdale's oncoming attack. Without wasting time, he hit said man with his shield, almost mimicking what he did to him. When he fell to the ground, Alistair attacked him endlessly. If this kept on, Loghain would yield soon enough.
And yield he did.
"I yield!" He gasped out painfully, kneeling on the ground. He was covered with wounds and blood. He was also breathing hard, trying to catch his breath. Alistair was, too. He, compared to Loghain, only had a few bruises and cuts on him.
"So, there is some Maric in you after all," Loghain managed to breathe out as he caressed his side; there was a huge gash on it. "Good."
"Forget Maric," Alistair angrily retorted. "This is for Duncan."
It was then that Elissa appeared by his side and placed a hand on his arm. He looked at her, eyes softening a bit. She nodded her head at him, and then looked at Loghain. Alistair nodded back as a silent agreement. Drawing his sword once again, eyes narrowing slightly, he pulled it high up in the air before he slashed the man's head off of his body.
The head fell on the floor with a disgustingly loud thud, blood oozing out of it. The body convulsed for a moment before it fell limp. Anora immediately knelt beside her dead father's body.
The sight reminded Elissa of her own father. She immediately looked away, reminding herself that she should not grieve for her enemy.
"So it is decided," Eamon spoke, grabbing everyone's attention. "Alistair will take his father's throne."
"Wait, what? No! When did this get decided? Nobody has decided that, have they?"
"He refuses to take the throne. Everyone has heard him. I think it's clear then, he abdicates in favour of me. "
"I hardly think you're the appropriate person to mediate this, Anora. Warden, will you help us?"
Elissa mentally rolled her eyes. She wished these people would address her by her name. She had a name, Maker's breath! She merely let out a sigh, attracting a puzzled look from Alistair. She did not, however, explain and made sure to avoid his eyes.
"Allow me then," she said, taking a step forward. She stood up straight, just like how a Cousland would carry herself. An eerily silence befell on the Landsmeet Chamber as everyone waited for her to announce who would take the throne.
Anora looked at her expectantly. Why wouldn't she?
Elissa promised that she would support Anora in the Landsmeet and in return, Anora would give her support to the Grey Wardens. Anora, however, did not know that Elissa lied to her. It was payback for what she did back at Howe's palace. Karma, as everyone had claimed, really was a bitch.
Elissa played dirty, as well.
"As the arbiter of this dispute, what is your decision? Who will lead Ferelden?" Arl Eamon asked, waiting expectantly.
She took a deep breath. With her chin up high, she said, "The Calenhads had always sat on the throne. We had almost lost them because of the Orlesians, but King Maric changed that. The rightful heir of the throne has always been them." She paused as she looked at everyone. "Therefore, by automatic, Alistair will be the rightful king of the throne."
"And I accept that decision," Alistair acknowledged with a hard look on his face.
"Anora, the Landsmeet has decided against you. You must now swear fealty to our king, and relinquish all claim to the throne for yourself and your heirs."
"If you think I will swear that oath, Eamon, you know nothing of me," Anora snapped angrily. Once she said that, her sharp glare fell on Elissa. "And you! You betrayed me!" She hissed venomously.
"You'll have to do something about her, Alistair. With her on the way, we may risk yet another civil war," Elissa said, visibly ignoring Anora.
"I suppose that's true..."
"We cannot leave Ferelden in a state of civil war. We must have unity. If she will not swear fealty to you, Alistair, and renounce her claim to the throne, she is a threat to us all."
"Put her in the tower for now. If I fall against the Blight, she can have her throne. If not…then we'll see."
"You would give me a chance for the throne after all this?" Anora looked incredulously at him.
"I said if I fall, Anora. If I fall, the throne falls to you. I won't kill you while there's a chance that can happen. Somebody has to treat this Blight seriously."
"That is uncharacteristically wise of you."
"Yes, well, don't let it get around. I have a reputation."
"Very well, then. Guards, take her away."
"Your Highness, would you address the Landsmeet?"
"Oh…that would be me. Right, um…I never knew him, but from all I've heard of my father, what defined him was his commitment to protecting this land…"
Elissa resisted the urge to slap her forehead. If this continued on, Alistair would end up ridiculing himself in front of the whole Landsmeet. And dear Maker, would that be embarrassing…
"Just get to the Blight already, Alistair," she whispered promptly to him.
"I was getting there!" He whispered frantically back at her. She could sense that he still felt nervous in front of this crowd.
'He'll get used to it,' was her dismissive thought.
"Anyway," he said with a cough. "The Blight. Yes."
He took a deep breath, perhaps to gather his wits to him and began his speech.
"I may be Maric's son, but I am also a Grey Warden. I took an oath: I swore I would stand and fight the darkspawn, no matter the cost to myself. I can't break that oath just to wear the crown. I have to go with my fellow Warden to face the Blight. When the Blight is over, I'll come back and take up my duties…whatever they are…as king. Until then, I think Arl Eamon will have to be my regent."
"Then I can do Maric's memory no less honor than you do. I accept. And may the Maker bless your efforts against the darkspawn."
"My fellow Grey Warden will, I hope, take Loghain's place as the leader of my armies. Shall we finish this thing together?"
"We will beat this Blight, as King Cailan had dreamt."
"Everyone, get ready to march. It's going to take all of Ferelden's strength to survive this Blight. But we will face it. And we'll defeat it."
"So," Leliana began once Elissa had returned back from the royal palace. Both she and Alistair were back at Arl Eamon's estate. Right now, everyone—except Alistair—was present in her assigned room.
"What happened in the Landsmeet?" The bard asked as she patiently waited for Cousland's answer.
"Alistair is king," the young Cousland replied, brushing a few of strands of her hair behind her ear. "Loghain is executed and Anora, in the meantime, is at Fort Drakon."
"So a fool is sitting on the throne," Morrigan remarked. "Ferelden is sure to be doomed, then."
"I'm sure Alistair will be a good king, Morrigan," Leliana said. "He's not that much of a fool."
"And with that witty tongue of his, I'm sure he'll do fine, no?" Zevran added with a mischievous grin, nodding at her way.
Morrigan merely rolled her eyes before she crossed her arms over her chest. She did not say anything after that.
"We'll be marching off to Redcliffe at sunrise," Elissa announced once everyone was listening to her again. "I want you all to be ready by then."
"It's the big battle then, huh?" Wynne said with her mannerly and soft voice.
She nodded to the older woman as an answer.
"Arl Eamon and his troops have already left for Redcliffe, therefore, I want you all to rest and—"
There was a curt knock on the door before it swung open, revealing Alistair. He looked serious and…also on edge.
"We...need to talk." The way his tone sounded made her feel tense and worried. It seemed everyone noticed this, too, for they didn't say anything. Elissa looked back at them and softly dismissed them. They all silently left. Sten was the last to leave and he closed the door behind him.
There was silence once they were alone. Elissa was uncertain what to say. Was he mad that she made him king? Possibly because he made it very clear to her and everyone else that he did not want to be king. Yet here she was, with the Landsmeet over and him the newly crowned king.
"I'm not going to question why you made me a king," he suddenly said, putting her train of thoughts to a stop. "I even think I'm starting to come around on the idea, anyhow...it could be an interesting future for me."
"Then what seems to be the matter?" She asked carefully.
He looked away from her, his hands brushing his hair backwards. The way he was acting worried her even more.
"Being a king, that raises some questions about us," he said, deliberately avoiding her eyes. "About you and me."
"It doesn't need to impact on us at all," she said.
"You don't think so? Maybe you're right, but I've thought of almost nothing else since the Landsmeet."
He suddenly started pacing back and forth, his hands shaking at the very slightest. He still refused to meet her eyes. She could feel her heart pounding rather rapidly now. Her hands had become cold and sweaty.
"First, there's the fact that both you and I are Grey Wardens. It's not just a question of obligation, but of blood. You know that Grey Wardens don't usually live to become old, right?"
"Yes," she said, "I'm aware of that."
"As king, I'll be required to have a child, even more so because my death is assured. That's assuming that someone with the taint can or even should have a child."
"Are you suggesting I have this child?"
"No." Her heart nearly broke when she heard him say that. Was he seriously…?
"I'm not... I mean, both of us have tainted blood. Both of us will die young. I will need to find a wife, one who can bear a child. Who will live to raise it. I don't relish it, but...I will have a duty as the king."
It was then that realization hit her like a brick. Her chest had suddenly tightened, her throat becoming dry. He was seriously ending it. He was seriously ending their relationship.
Why?!
She thought he loved her with all his heart. She thought that he would do anything for them to be together. So why…
"I love you," he said sincerely, his voice shaking. He slowly approached her and held her hands with his. "More than I ever thought possible, but…I have to face what this means. I can't run away from it anymore."
She unconsciously pulled her hands away from his touch, surprising both her and him. His hands formed into fists, his eyes gleaming with unshed tears. He took a step back, not attempting to hold her hands once again.
She turned her back to him, tears rapidly forming in her eyes. She bit her lower lip in an attempt to stop herself from crying. She loved him, very much so. But if this was what he wanted…
"…I think I understand then." She barely recognized her own voice, wondering where this sudden sternness came from. She was tempted to beg him not to do this; she really wanted to.
"I could see it becoming very hard to tear myself away from you. Impossible, even. If this is what must be, then…then I have to do it now."
He took a deep breath to calm himself.
"I'm sorry."
"Don't," she swiftly said, facing him. "Just. Don't apologize. I understand. It's over."
"I think it is best. For both our sakes," he agreed, finally looking at her in the eyes only to meet with cold green eyes.
"You'll be a good king," she said coldly, facing away from him. Perhaps he deserved that. After all they had been though, only to have him call it off…
"But I'll gladly trade all of those things for what I really want," he said softly, but she said nothing, refusing to look at him
"I...need to go back to my room. Be by myself for a while," he said. When she didn't say anything, he merely gazed at her with sad eyes before he finally left her.
When the door finally closed behind him, it was then that she let her unshed tears reveal itself to her. Her cries are mixed with hysterical and angry sobs, unable to control them anymore. Her knees gave away as she fell on the cold floor.
Alistair stood from the other side of the door, his own tears gracing down his cheeks as he listened to her cries.
"I'm sorry..."
The occasional clink of silverware utensils sound in the regal main hall of the Castle Cousland. In spite of its enormous space, only two people sit at the dinner table, a few knights standing firm and alert on the sideline, and a mabari dog that nestles on the floor.
The castle is almost fixed and recovered since the events...from a year and more than a half before. It is not the way it used to be, that much the two occupants would agree to.
The remaining Couslands eat their dinner in silence, none of them making an attempt to converse with each other. However, it is Fergus Cousland—the new Teyrn of Higher—that keeps giving his younger sister worried glances. She is silent more so than he is used to and has remained this way after the Blight. He assumes, after her venture to Amaranthine, that this would perhaps change. But he is proven wrong as he encounters this strange behavior of hers.
Elissa Cousland, however civilized and manipulative she is in the world of politics, is a talkative and laidback person. He is not used to this new her and he misses those childish smiles she used to give him. It is true that the Blight and the recent venture to Amaranthine have changed her greatly. She has become wise, less brash, but has turned cold. To change her to such extent…
He is worried, very much worried.
He has a cunning suspicion that perhaps the Blight alone is not the cause of this sudden change. He has heard rumors of her being romantically involved with someone. Not just someone but the King of Ferelden.
Maker preserve them all.
Then there was talk that their relationship had ended…unwell. He did not believe these rumors, however. Her? His little sister being romantically involved with someone? She preferred her freedom and did not show any uncanny interest with men. The notion is rather ridiculous but perhaps…
It's a possibility. He has seen her act when around the king. She is more guarded, even colder, and just less...human. Even the king…he looked sad whenever his gaze fell on her.
Perhaps the rumors are true then.
"Thank you for the lovely dinner, dear brother," she says, promptly interrupting his train of thoughts.
Dear brother...She never addressed him as such except Fergus or something a lady wouldn't really say.
"Really? Could've fooled me since you barely touched your food, young lady," he says, attempting some humor. But when he is merely greeted with an expressionless face, he lets out a sigh.
"Elissa, are you all right?"
"Of course I am," is her immediate response as she wipes her lips with a linen napkin.
"No you aren't," he points out calmly but carefully. "Please, Elissa. You are the only one I have left of this family. Please, don't isolate yourself from me. I'm your brother. Granted that I have been an arse since we were kids, but you know I still care and love you, right?" He asks, holding her hand that has become rough and calloused during her days as Grey Warden. He remembers how they used to be smooth and free of scars, only used for embroidery or writing literature.
She finally looks at him, even looking at him straight in the eyes. Then, a smile formed on her lips. Although it as a tiny one, at least it is still there.
"I know," she says very softly. "And I love you as well...Fergus."
She squeezes his hand gently before she kisses the back of his hand like she used to whenever they were making up after a fight. It became a habit since childhood.
"I love you, as much as I love Mother and Father, Oren and Oriana, and—"
She immediately stops herself from finishing her sentence after she realizes something. She then promptly pulls her hand away from him, eyes becoming hard as stone. But then the sincerity in her eyes returns once she looks back at him and then a sad smile appears on those pale lips of hers.
"I'll treasure every single memory of you all."
Fergus is confused by her words but is not able to ask her what she means as she left the dinner table after excusing herself, her mabari dog, Rabbit,trailing behind her.
A few days later after this conversation, the Castle Cousland is in an uproar.
Elissa Cousland, Hero of Ferelden, has gone missing.