Tortured Mind

by Lovebetween2hearts

This is just a poem of my own of a man not able to escape his mind though he is dead.

Nothing, nothing, nothing,

Is what I am is what I feel,

But I want to be something,

Although I can't,

For I lay beneath the cold ground waiting for my mind to stop working,

But it won't,

Will it ever,

I want to stop thinking,

I want to stop feeling,

Do people know I think,

Do they know I feel, of course not,

I'm a corpse, what I feel and think is not right,

My mind, my body, it's supposed to be dead,

But its not,

Do others feel, do others think,

No, their minds are free, their minds are dark,

Dark like midnight, quiet like the air,

Why am I different, why,

I want to be like them, I envy them,

They don't feel or think,

I want that,

My mother always told me I had a strong spirit,

But is it strong enough to keep my mind alive, though I am a corpse,

I guess it is,

But I took that knife to my chest to free myself from my mind, my body,

But yet it still tortures me,

Will I lie like this forever, or will my body rest once it knows it's time to,

I guess I'll have to wait,

I have to wait until my mind no longer tortures me,

Until then I'll lay here quietly, listening to the world above me go on,

I'll listen quietly as people talk to me,

Do they know I can hear them,

Probably or why would they talk,

Talk,

I wish I could, I wish I could tell my daughters, my sons, my wife, that I love them,

And was not trying to escape them,

I just wanted to leave, they'll never understand,

When they are like me, I will tell them,

I will help them through it,

For I see, I will forever lay like this until they are gone, gone like me,

I think I can wait,

I think I can rest my tortured mind when they are gone,

Might be a while,

But I'll wait,

I'll wait quietly,

Like I have for years.