Consequences.

-NobleWriterofWho

Authors Note: Not gonna lie I feel a bit bad writing this one. You'll see why. Still, hope you like it. And criticism is appreciated of course. Also spoilers! Only a few references to previous episodes.

Summary: Amy Pond can't ever have children after what was done to her on Demons Run. One night she finally tells the Doctor. His reaction isn't what she expected.

…

She had trouble sleeping most nights. Even with Rory's arms wrapped around making her feel safe and loved it was still hard. And it didn't the nightmares. Nothing did. They got better after the Doctor returned to their lives the previous Christmas. But even then they persisted. Tonight they had been particularly horrific. Madame Kovarian had stood over her laughing. In her arms, she held a sleeping Melody. Amy hadn't been able to move. She had to watch as Melody was taken away from her. Amy doubted that she'd ever get a good night sleep again. With a groan, she crawled out of bed careful not to disturb Rory. She didn't know where she was going yet. The TARDIS was massive, the Doctor even said infinite, so she would see where her feet took her.

She heard singing. It was strange. Beautifully so. She couldn't recognize the language. She followed it and wound up in the control room. Underneath the control room, she found the Doctor quietly working in his swing. He hadn't noticed her yet far too occupied with whatever he was 'fixing' or as he liked to call it 'improving'. She smiled and hoped he would still be able to take them back home after he was done.

"Doctor, why are you singing?"

The singing stopped. He hastily whipped his around looking for her. He banged it against, well she didn't know what it was, it looked like a metal pipe. It must have hurt because he lost his balance and fell to the floor. His hand went to his head feeling that a knot was already forming. With a moan, he got back in his swing.

"Amy, what are you doing up? Humans need sleep, yes?"

She sighed sitting down on the steps. Might as well tell him.

"We do, but I can't sleep,"

Silence. The Doctor turned away from her and began fiddling with a few wires. They sparked and he jerked his head back.

"Aren't you going to ask why?" she asked.

He smiled, "It's Rory's turn, Pond,"

She scoffed. He could be so childish.

"I killed someone,"

Now, he was listening. Except instead of anger or alarm he seemed sympathetic, calm even. Like he knew what she'd done. How could he know? He asked her anyway.

"Who?"

"Kovarian,"

She said the name like it was a curse. Poison on her tongue. She could still remember the woman's pleading voice.

"Amy, help me."

Madame Kovarian had been so certain that she would too. That she was better than that. Cold blooded murder.

"I didn't just kill her I made sure her death was painful. Excruciating. And I enjoyed it, Doctor. The look on her face..." Amy trailed off unable to continue.

She had been delighted to be able to hurt Kovarian. To hear her scream. She looked at the Doctor expecting to see a look of horror on his face. She didn't see it though. He was just listening to her.

"Doctor, what does that make me?" she whispered her voice trembling.

She wasn't sure she would be able to bear his answer, but she couldn't help it. She had to know.

"Amelia...I don't know,"

"Oh, come on Raggedy Man," she huffed she didn't want him to coddle her.

He took a deep breath and sat down next to her, "Well, technically that never happened anyway. That timeline never was, so I don't know. Madame Kovarian was an evil woman. She took your child, your baby from you and hurt her. Does that excuse your actions? No. Of course not. But, as a parent I understand them. We all do terrible things sometimes. What you did was terrible. But, you're a good person despite this. This doesn't make you a monster. At least I don't think it does,"

Amy rested her head on his shoulder. He threw an arm around her and gave her a reassuring squeeze on the shoulder. She sniffled trying not to cry.

"She took more than that from me,"

The Doctor waited for her to continue.

"I can't ever have children-" Amy choked out.

She was sobbing now. The weight of that statement hit her again. It was hard to even imagine much less come to terms with it. Every day she tried to push it out of her mind. But, she was reminded. Everything reminded her. Children, especially younger ones, playing with their parents. Couples parading around their newborn baby on social media or in public places. When she went shopping the baby items seemed to fill every store. Even Rory. Sweet Rory who never hurt her managed to make her heart ache every day because she could see the sadness in his eyes. Sadness that he tried to hide so well but couldn't. All because she couldn't give him children.

"I never thought about it a lot. I never knew I wanted it. A family. But, I do Doctor. I do. I want it so badly now that I can't. I just can't," she whimpered.

The Doctor held her tight giving her a shoulder to cry on.

"I'm sorry. I am so sorry, Pond," he whispered, "I know what that's like. To want it so bad even though it's impossible!"

She pulled away and stared at him with glassy eyes, "With River...you mean"

He nodded clenching his jaw.

"With the timelines, we could never even if we were physically compatible and if they hadn't made sure that she couldn't ever-" he said abruptly clamping his mouth shut shaking his head bitterly.

"Doctor, I never thought. I just…"

The Doctor was holding back tears now. Amy gaped at him. She couldn't believe she hadn't ever realized that they couldn't have a child or that they would even want to have a child. Her stomach twisted in knots. She must be a terrible friend. She just couldn't imagine the Doctor that way or River that way. They were anything but normal and yet, they were going through this too.

"I'm sorry too," she said finally.

This meant that the Doctor really did understand what she was going through. What Rory was going through as well. She should have come to him to talk about this sooner. He could have helped her and she could have helped him. All cried out she sighed and let herself melt into his embrace. She pretended not to notice the dampness against her shirt from his tear while she rubbed his back. They just sat taking comfort in each other's presence. Time passed without them noticing or caring about it. Suddenly, he pulled away from her and lifted her chin to where they were eye to eye.

"Amelia, there's something you need to realize though. Something you already know and need reminding of. You have a family! Rory, River, and I are your family. We are your family, and we will always be there for you through anything. You can't forget that ok?" he said firmly in a voice that invited no room for question.

"Ok, as long as you do the same," she said just as firmly.

"Of course, Pond,"

"There is always adoption. Maybe someday…" Amy said trailing off.

The Doctor just nodded. They stayed there for the rest of the night. Rory found asleep leaning on each other where they had been sitting on the stairs the next morning. He shook his head smiling realizing what a rare sight it was to find either of them sleeping peacefully. He tried to make them more comfortable by wrapping a blanket around them. Then, he sat down beside them and waited for his family to wake up.