Disclaimer: Don't own Chas or John...unfortunately.

I'm trying to open my eyes. I really am, John, but I can't. I have to close my eyes, the light hurts to much. Everything looks brighter, John, it hurts, please don't let me go.

I'm sorry. The pain hurts so much. The pains fading, but that means so am I. I'm sorry John, I should've listened. You were right, you always are, I wasn't ready for this, God this hurts so much, leaving you.

I'm trying to move my hands, somehow trying to intertwine my fingers with yours, but I don't think it's going to work. John whatever you do, please don't give up your life, okay? I know you're sick of this life, but if you leave your own life behind, just because I died, then I will kill you, John Constantine, you hear me?

Jesus, I have to close my eyes tighter, the light, its...its seeping in through my eyelids. It's kind of orangey too, but I'm not paying any attention to that, I must open my eyes, for you John, only for you.

I have to tell to you, John, I have to tell you, that...

"Chas," you say, but your voice, it's...it's far away, and the light, Jesus fucking christ, it's so bright, but the only thing I see is your eyes, they're glassy looking, must be hitting you that I'm dying, huh, John?

I have to tell you, though, I have to tell you that, that I...

Damn, the light intensified. I close my eyes, but it makes no difference, and I have to tell you, I need to tell you, John, please oh please oh please God, let me say this, just let me tell you, let tell him that-

The lights' dimmed down , but only a fraction, and I say it. I say it, but I'm not sure you've heard me, and I try to say it again, and instead something totally stupid comes out. But I think you know now, it doesn't matter, it doesn't matter, but you know now don't you.

And fuck the light its gotten brighter I can't hold on much longer John I wish you'd tell me something tell me it's going to be okay or something oh God the light it hurts so bad John I love you I love you John I love you so much I love you I'm sorry I didn't listen I'm so sorry John I lo-

"Chas?"

"...Chas?"

"Chas!"