"Aaah-choo!" – Anna sneezed. It was like the gasp of a mouse, who had sneezed and wasn't a mouse and was Anna. For the third time today, the mounting dust in her shop had found its way in to her nostril. "I need to sweep this place", she thought.
She looked around her place of work, dust wasn't the only impurity to be seen. Cobwebs crowded the corners of her chain store, critically cracking her corneas with the constant cackling curse of their continued coexistence. She stared at a spider that had taken up residence in her window. It stared back. She looked away. The spider enjoyed its victory.
The clock muttered on in the background, teasing her, reminding her of just how long it had been since her last customer. She looked at the clock, and calculated that it had been three days, 4 hours, 20 minutes and 24 – no, 25 seconds. She was good with numbers. A bit like Carol Vorderman. Anna often worried she too would be replaced by a younger, more attractive blonde chick, especially given how fanservicey Fire Emblem is now. The recent lack of money, money make had her distraught. The usual flow of boom boom dollar seemed to have dried up, much like Anna's panties given her financial situation.
She sighed. "If this keeps up, I'll have to close down the shop, great gramma would be so disappointed". Her thoughts turned to her great grandmother, Anna, who had opened the shop originally, after leaving a job at Costcutters due to the shameful £4 per hour wage. For a fleeting moment, she wished the women of her family had more diverse names. She also wished they didn't have to get extensive plastic surgery to make them all look exactly the same. Lastly, she wished that all the males born of her family didn't get thrown in a blender at birth to be battered and sold as chicken nuggets. This feeling soon left, however, as she reassured herself, "This is the way it must be."
A bell sounded, rending her from her deep thought. It signalled the opening of the door. Was this the hope she had been waiting for? Finally, the light at the end of the tunnel? It was Lissa. Her jet black hair swayed as she walked up to the counter, her 9.5/10 waifu-ness made abundantly clear by the cute spring in her step, ruffling her weird "Nightmare's Steelcage" skirt. This made Anna self-conscious about her comparatively weak 7.8/10 waifu-ness. "Have you come to buy something?", asked Anna, eagerly. With this, Lissa turned her back on Anna, bent over slightly, craned her head over her shoulder to look back at Anna and announced, "No."
"Well what do you want, then?", asked anna sharpy, embittered by Lissa's "No Money Down" policy, and jealous that she is nearly as kawaii as Tsukasa. "Robin says you need to get ready. We're doing preparations for an attack on the enemy later tonight". With that, Lissa bounded out of the room with all the energy of a really cute blonde girl from a stratergy/RPG video game, the button things in her hair rattling away.
Anna often regretted her decision to join the Shepherds. It forced her to close the shop at odd times. "Maybe that's why I'm not getting any customers anymore. They don't know when the shop will be open". However, she couldn't deny that the loss was partially made up by the the loot she picked up on the battlefield. Most of the time she was able to take a wedding ring, a pocket watch and a handful of loose cash from the corpses of a few Plegian soldiers before anyone noticed she was gone.
She began to mentally prepare herself for the battle ahead, hover, she was once again interrupted by the door. "Probably Lissa again, back to flaunt how cute she is. Well she wishes she had a… cape like I have." However, it wasn't Lissa. It was a man. Anna's eyes were immediately drawn to his enormous, dangling wad of money. It was gripped in his right hand and proudly held out in front of him.
He whopped his wad on the counter with such a force as to awaken Anna from her transfixion upon it. She moved her eyes upwards to meet his. Her heart fluttered as she took her first look at his sharp, sapphire eyes. Knowledge lay behind them, that was clear. At that same moment, a beautiful song began to play In her head. It sounded like this (watch?v=TYiJqBMFYZc), and it signalled that she at last knew the meaning of the phrase "Love at first sight".
Anna tried to compose herself. She asked "Hello, what's your name?", barely managing to sqeeze out the words. The man replied,
"My name
my name
my name
is Loadsamoney".
Her heart melted. She was fully under his spell. She was brought back to the real world by his next words, "Twenty Mayfair please, love." She obliged him straight away As she handed him the pack, their hands touched and a spark ran through their arms. Their eyes met once again, and Harry's voice broke the electric silence, "You look like a diamond bird."
This was interrupted, however, by yet another face appearing in the door way. Anna must have been too distracted to notice the bell. It was Robin, her pink hair frazzled by the stress of plotting tactics for the upcoming battle. "What are you doing, Anna?", she asked, "get out here. We need to prepare for attacking the enemy's left flank".
Anna was disappointed to have leave the side of the man of her dreams, but she tried to put on a brave face. "Great, I'll grab my stuff!", she said. "There is no time, your sword is enough", replied Robin, and with that they were off. And so, the budding romance was put on hold for now. Will these lovebirds meet again? Will their story have a happy ending? Will Will Smith ever release a new album? Find out next time on HarriAnna: Love for Money.
