S: A/N: Welp, I had this all planned out, I would be the first one to enter a story in to the contest and it would set the bar, then procrastination and life happened, and here I am. Oh well, I don't care, I got it out.

This one follows an interesting gimmick. If you want to follow along with this story in a much more inclusive way, follow along with the music album this story's namesake is taken from, "The Sufferer & The Witness" by Rise Against. Believe me, it helps. There will be a link to it on my profile and the forum.

I'll stop myself here so that I don't accidentally go over the word count. Again, thanks to those who participated, but now here's where I come in. Wahahaha!

- Sheppard


This Is Noise


*Track 1*

Oh man, I can't believe what today is. It's finally the day I can officially say I've graduated.

Yet, I've never felt so nervous in my life. Not once was I expecting this much pressure.

Heh, such is the problem with being valedictorian I guess. I can't help the fact I put time into my studies. It's what I wanted to do… It's what my parents wanted me to do… It's a shame they aren't here to see it.

I will admit, I am a bit jumpy right now. I want this day to be as awesome as I'm hyping it up to be, so that all starts with appearance and presentment. Well, I don't want to look like I just spent five hours and hundreds of credits at the beauty salon, but… I also don't want to look hideous either. I just don't know how to compromise.

I could literally see the tracks of footprints I left in the carpeting between my room and the bathroom, because like I said, I'm a bit jumpy and I want to get something done right away. Usually other girls would have a plan for how they would get ready for an event such as this, but not me. I never needed to plan how I got ready, it just came natural to me. Now… I hate to say it, but I might be panicking. I need to leave in less than twenty minutes, and I don't look as good as I want to. I'm really freaking out.

"Shannon!" I yipped, trying to get my sister's attention from the other side of the house. "I need to use your hairbrush, where is it?"

"You don't even have hair, Vixy!" I heard Shannon shout from what sounded like the garage due to its vague echo and muffled reverberation.

I moaned to myself in impatience and managed to waste another minute of my already tightened time digging through the cabinet under the sink before I located her hairbrush. Right as I tried to do some last minute grooming, the handle on the bathroom door rustled. I gasped and immediately pressed my back against the door, hoping my rather diminutive weight would deter my sister's entrance.

"Vix, come on," Shannon whined, pounding on the door. "Let me in."

"I'm not ready yet," I shouted back immediately. Shannon gave the door a particularly heavy check with her shoulder, almost ripping the door off of its hinges as my frame became completely visible to my older sister.

Shannon was four years older than I was, but she was such a splitting image of myself that people would think we were twins if they disregarded the hair and height. I was about a head shorter than she was, and she had a full head of sandy blonde shoulder length hair, something I would have had a long time ago. Upon making eye contact, her sky blue eyes shot wide open in visible awe.

"Oh my god… Vixy," she whispered, letting a large grin crease her muzzle. "You look stunning!"

I didn't want to disagree with her openly, but internally I was indeed arguing with her. I could see visible spots where my fur was matted, and for some divine reason I couldn't get enough makeup around my eyes to make them pop in the way I wanted them too. Blushing, I glanced at the mirror and felt my ears lie flat.

"You don't have to bump me up, sis," I mumbled. "Just tell me I don't look good."

"I wouldn't say it I it wasn't true, Vix," Shannon replied with a slight giggle. "Seriously. You look amazing. And the dress too? Honey, how do you just throw these kinds of things on and look as marvelous as you do?"

I blushed yet again, unable to withhold my smile as I glanced down at my dress. It was a brand new dress, but it looked oddly familiar as well because it looked almost identical to a dress my mother wore for her prom. Just a one-piece pale violet dress, snug around my waist but comfortable enough for me to move. The pleaded extension gracefully flowed over my legs and stopped at my ankles, while the shoulder straps rested around my neck and left my arms completely exposed. I placed a paw over my partially exposed chest and narrowed my eyes.

"I don't know if this is appropriate or not," I said softly, knowing good and well that it was more concealing than what my other friends might wear to the same occasion.

"You're beautiful," Shannon answered proudly. "Now come on, get your shoes on. You don't want to be late for the ceremony, do you?"

"Of course I don't want to be late," I retorted, flipping the light switch off. "I'm just really nervous."

"There's no need to worry Vixy," Shannon said in assurance, clamping her paws down around my upper arms. "This is your day. Nothing will go wrong."

"But, I've never done anything like this before," I reminded. "Public speaking isn't my strong suit… Plus, I haven't really come up with a speech yet."

"Neither did I until I stepped on stage when I was in your shoes," Shannon grinned. "It'll come to you, I promise."

"Maybe taking that valedictorian title was a mistake," I muttered.

"Absolutely not," Shannon argued. "You deserve that. After what you had to go through to get there, there's nobody else more deserving of that title than you. Come on, let's get there before you're late."

I let a smile surface, but I had to pick up my pace as Shannon was practically running out of the house and towards the car parked in the driveway. I barely had enough time to slip my shoes on and lock the front door before Shannon started the car. I barely had time to get comfortable in the car after I shut the door before she was slowly pulling out of the driveway and was barreling down city streets.

*Track 2*

Shannon placed a paw over my arm and smiled at me. "You excited for this?"

I nodded instantly. "Yeah, but… I'm still nervous. Like I said, I've never done anything like this."

"It may seem overwhelming, but it's really not that bad," Shannon explained, doing a great job of calming my nerves so far. "It's only gonna be your friends and their families there. They know who you are. It's not like you're talking to a bunch of strangers."

I couldn't help but agree. Most of them knew who I was and what kind of a person I was. I may shock them if I suddenly pop up on stage with a well prepared speech and say it flawlessly. Maybe being a bit jittery and nervous is what they would expect from me. It still didn't seem professional though, but who was I to be professional?

"You're right," I blurted out, smiling wholeheartedly for the first time today. "Thanks Shannon. What would I do without you?"

"You'd probably be walking to the ceremony right now," she wittily remarked, to which I couldn't help but giggle at her and give her a playful nudge.

That wasn't the answer that I was expecting, but I knew what she would have said if I wasn't a nervous wreck. She took care of me like I was her own child ever since mom and dad's plane crashed. She knew that my parent meant a lot to me, so she did what she could to help fill in that gap in my life. To me, Shannon was the greatest sibling anyone could ask for, and I'm glad that she has stood by me every step of the way.

Just thinking about my parents made me lose that life and bubbliness in my expression, and Shannon knew it.

"I just wish they could see this," I said thoughtfully, fogging up the glass of my window with my breath as I stared out into the cloudless blue sky, the same sky that I always remember my mother comparing my eyes to.

"I do too sweetie," Shannon answered. "They would be so proud of you… I know I am."

I absentmindedly nodded, completely intoxicated with the beauty of the outside.

"They're still watching you, ya know?" Shannon smirked. "They might not be here, but they still know what you're about to do. Believe me, if they could talk to you right now, they would say how proud they are. They never expected you to be this successful."

"I just wanted to surprise them," I added. "I wanted them to know that their teachings to me didn't go to waste. I fought through adversity, just like dad told us to do."

"See? You're already getting a good idea of what your speech will be," Shannon smiled. "Just let that mindset flow into words. You'll be fine. It doesn't have to be too long, ya know?"

"Yeah, I think I'll keep it short so that I don't waste everybody's time," I giggled. The rest of the short car ride went on in silence before she pulled into the familiar parking lot of my now former school. Immediately after turning the engine off, we both exited the car while I turned towards the trunk to get my royal blue silk gown and cap, and as I quickly threw them on my sister was right there to watch.

"They did a great job at the color choosing," she remarked. "Matches your beautiful eyes."

"Thanks sis," I giggled, adjusting the gown on my shoulders. "You staying to watch?"

"I wouldn't miss this for the world, Vix," she smiled. I smiled myself and pulled her in for one of my signature bear hugs, Shannon letting out a hoarse wheeze at my unnatural strength.

"Thanks for being such a great sister, Shannon," I grinned widely, letting my tail flick with mirth and joy.

"I'll always be there for ya little sis," she mimicked my grin, giving me one last peck on my muzzle. "Now go, I think they just called your name."

I swore silently and instantly rushed through the parking lot towards the open-air venue. Within moments I heard my name called again and picked up my pace if that was even remotely possible, and it didn't take long before I was on stage, staring out at the thousands in attendance while my favorite principal was handing me my diploma. He muttered something along the lines of "good luck" as he stepped away from the podium, leaving me face to face with the entire school.

*Tracks 3 & 4*

I gulped silently and continued to stare out at the crowd as the applause from my friends died down. Remembering what my sister told me, I took a deep breath to calm myself down, then just let the words tumble through my teeth and into the microphone, amplifying my words so that everyone could hear.

"I just want to say… this is one of the best experiences of my life," I managed a slight chuckle, feeling my heart rate start to simmer somewhat. "I never would have thought that I would be the one to give this speech. I never was all that smart at first. I was shy… I still am to be honest, but I was a lot worse before… Before my parents passed away."

I let that knowledge sink I for a bit before I continued. "Ever since then, I strived to be the best person I could be. I fought through a lot of adversity, my parents dying most notably, but another one was how I battled through a pretty nasty and aggressive case of cancer. Yeah, I know some of you guys didn't know that, but I did. I was in rough shape, but almost a half year of therapy and radiation treatment – and a full head of hair later – I'm perfectly fine. Not a trace left in me."

A low chorus of applause and cheers ensued as I nodded in acceptance, smiling at the praise I was getting.

"Ya know, I still feel kinda bad about losing all my hair, but… It could have been a lot worse, and by that I mean that someone else could be giving this speech. I'm very lucky that I survived."

I looked to the sky briefly before continuing, a small smile surfacing as the words just flew off my tongue without a moment's hesitation. "It just goes to show… Just a little bit of fight and determination gets you a long way. My father told me to always fight against adversity… and look at me now. Even a little bit of fight will take you a long way in life…"

I paused momentarily, but that was all the crowd needed to assume that I was finished, commencing their deafening howls of applause and cheers. I grinned to myself as I realized that my speech came off as the way I wanted to, then gave a happy wave to the rest of my class as I stepped away and out of their view. Once I was behind the stage, I let out a sigh of relief, disbelieving that I was able to make the crowd explode like they did with such a short speech.

Although, there was one thing that was eating away at me ever since I stepped on stage. My boyfriend, Garrett Ross, wasn't in attendance. It's not like I didn't see him because of the insane attendance, in fact I could have spotted him anywhere because of his vibrant red fur color and his rather interesting mutation that gave him two tails instead of just one. Checking my surroundings to see if there was anyone watching me, I silently crept around the stage and back towards the parking lot to see if I could spot his car in the sea of automobiles.

*Track 5*

After about five minutes of scouring the surrounding area, I finally saw Garrett's car pull into the parking lot. Although I was happy to see him, I felt a subconscious growl brew in my throat. I mean, it was a monumental moment for me, and he just now decided to show up? I'd be lying if I said I was happy with his actions. I immediately removed my royal blue ceremonial cap and stormed towards him, and once he made eye contact with me his tails started flicking.

"Where were you?" I questioned harshly before Garrett could even give me a hello. He was taken aback by the snap, yeah, but something about his body language just screamed through a megaphone that he didn't care one bit.

"I got held up with something, okay?" Garrett replied unconvincingly… or at least unconvincing to me. I gave him a rather nasty stare as a result, which all he did was roll his eyes at me, only adding to my fuming anger towards him.

"You couldn't have made plans or at least made an effort to try and come?" I snapped.

"I'm sorry Vix," Garrett tried to apologize, but I knew all too well that he wasn't sincere. He'd do the same thing again in a heartbeat, and it was about time I let him know that what he was dong to blow me off every day I needed him was starting to get under my fur.

"You knew how much today meant to me," I continued, letting my voice rise with anger. "This is a once-in-a-lifetime event for me, and you couldn't be bothered to show up?"

Garrett stayed silent, but I noticed that his eyebrows had subtly curled downward to narrow his eyes.

"Why?" I asked with a much quieter voice, trying to pry him out of his silent state. "You… you didn't forget… did you?"

"I'm sorry Vix," Garrett repeated, lowering his ears. "I just lost track of time."

"Seriously?" I nearly snarled. "This was your girlfriend's greatest day of her life, and you forget?"

"You know what?!" Garrett suddenly snapped, startling me quite a bit. Obviously I tipped a wire in his head, and he didn't take kindly to it. "I forgot about this ceremony because my mother has been sick this week, and I've been trying to take care of her! I'm sorry if I care about my family!"

I felt my heart drop in guilt as I lowered my ears. "Oh… I… I didn't know…" I said pitifully, tucking my tail between her legs. I honestly felt so bad about snapping at him now that he explained why he missed the ceremony.

"And I didn't know you could be so selfish," Garrett countered scornfully, contorting his muzzle in anger. "That's all I hear out of you is complaints about what I didn't do. I have a life too Vixy. I can't be there with you every minute of every day, especially when my mother is sick and I don't know if she will survive or not."

I felt a cold tear stream down my cheek. "Garrett, I'm so–"

"No you're not," Garrett interrupted. "You'll do it again given the chance."

I couldn't bring myself to speak. This was the most he's ever yelled at me before, and the worst part was I started it in the first place.

"Ya know what?" he growled, opening the door to his car. "We're done. I've had enough."

Again, my heart dropped in shock. "Garrett, wait," I cried, feeling my heart snap as he turned the engine on.

"Let me know when you stop being so selfish," he stated coldly, then didn't waste any time as he throttled forward and pulled out of the parking lot, leaving me heartbroken with tears streaming down my face.

And to think today was going so great… and it just toppled over faster than I ever wanted. It was supposed to be my night of celebration… but now I had one less person to celebrate it with. I couldn't be anything other than sad. Sad… and heartbroken.

Still with my tail tucked between my legs, I trudged back to the main hall, dragging my heels against the asphalt. I could practically see the trail of salty tears I was dragging behind me, unable to withhold them as the shock of the incident that had just transpired overwhelmed me. It may be a stretch to say it… but I think I can say that my day is officially ruined.

I had to go to my sister. She would be the only one to know what to do. As soon as she saw me trudge up to her with tear-stained cheeks, her kind and loving demeanor was instantly replaced with concern and worry.

"Vixy!" she gasped, instantly bolting over to me and clamping her paws down on my shoulders. "What happened?"

"Garrett broke up with me," I whimpered, burying my face into Shannon's shoulder. I could almost feel my sister's blood start to boil as she brought me in for a much needed embrace, my tears flowing from my eyes and onto her back.

"I'm so sorry baby," Shannon said in a very motherly, consoling voice, rubbing my back to attempt to calm me down.

"Why did it have to be today?" I sobbed, completely overwhelmed by the shock of the sudden breakup.

"I don't know sweetie," she replied, keeping her warm embrace. "You want me to take you home?"

Knowing that it wouldn't be the best if I just went home and cried alone, I shook my head so unnoticeably that Shannon almost didn't see or feel it. "No… I… I want to stay here…"

"You sure?" Shannon asked softly, gently lifting my head up. I gave a half-assed nod and forced a slight grin, one that my sister could see the visible pain and confliction in.

"I'll be okay," I said unconvincingly, brushing my gown off. "I think staying here with my friends will be better for me."

"Good call," Shannon grinned. "Whenever you want to come home just call me."

"Okay," I falsely grinned again. "Thanks sis."

"Just," she said right before I turned back around. "Have fun. This is your night. Don't let that jerk of a boyfriend ruin your night."

I winced unnoticeably as I felt the pain in my heart return, but still managed to nod and give Shannon one last hug. I exchanged goodbyes before Shannon trotted off, leaving me alone in front of the main hall's white iron and glass doors. With another agonized sigh, I wiped a tear away and slipped inside the building, hoping that someone inside would cheer me up.


*Track 6*

Four hours after my heart was broken, I still couldn't even try to piece it back together. I abandoned my royal blue gown and chatted with my friends in that brand new pale violet dress, but even that combination couldn't cheer me up. Although I would never decline a consolation attempt, I never even made my emotional state known through the numerous conversations with my friends, because I thought that if I just ignored it and did what cheered me up in normal circumstances the heartache would go away. Plus, I didn't want them to worry about me. Four hours of talking with my best friends later, it still hurt. The heartache refused to go away.

Abandoning the futile attempts to bring my cheer and happiness out, I accepted facts and hid away from the crowd, sitting on the second row of bleachers in the court where the reception was taking place. The lack of light around me reflected my emotional state, and I used the darkened area to my advantage, quietly crying into my arms.

It was during this time that I realized how much I missed my parents. They would be the ones to comfort me during times of emotional distress such as today, and even though my sister did a phenomenal job of filling in for them, she still couldn't give off that parental vibe that my bloodline parents could express. Just sitting alone to collect my thought would be the only thing that could make me feel better, but even in this instance, it was just as successful as trying to light a match underwater. It hurt and stung bad.

Even through the entrancing music and cheerful banter being exchanged between my fellow graduates, I could still hear the sound of boots clicking against the polished hardwood floor, progressively getting louder as they approached me. The boots came to a stop right in front of me, and even though I just wanted to growl and tell the person to leave me alone, a familiar voice stopped me in my tracks and gave me a miniscule jolt of joy – something I desperately needed.

"Vixy?" a soft spoken male voice spoke up, and before I could react I felt the bleacher seat creak as the person sat down next to me. "Are you okay?"

I dried away the tears trapped in my cheek fur and glanced up, grinning slightly as I recognized one of my closest friends, James McCloud. There was evident concern in his emerald green eyes, something that gave me a bit of reassurance – someone other than my sister cared. However, I wasn't expecting it from him, as he was a friend purely for the fun that he carried around on his shoulders, not for a shoulder to cry on. I was happy that he changed his mentality just this once, but… why?

I sniffed and wiped my nose. "I'm… I'm okay."

"Sure don't look okay," James grinned to lighten the mood. "What's up?"

"I don't want to talk about it," I replied, letting another rush of air leave my nose. "I just want to be left alone right now, okay?"

"Come on Vix," he said calmly, not taking my explanation for an answer. He patted his leg and scooted closer to me. "What's wrong?"

"James, please," I said impatiently. "I don't want to talk about it."

James wouldn't be deterred that easily, I knew he wasn't stupid enough to leave me alone, especially with how I was treating him. He inched even closer to me and wrapped his arm around me, his warmth and attempted affection stemming off of his taller and more muscular frame and onto my smaller frame, which I'll admit I sapped up like a superconductor.

"Okay, you were all smiles after your speech earlier today, and now you're sitting alone crying your eyes out?" James questioned, keeping his arm tightly wrapped around me. "Something happened. What's wrong?"

I fought back a sob, deciding to spill the beans to him considering that he was pestering me about it so much. "My boyfriend broke up with me after that speech because I was upset he didn't show up to watch."

I felt James' arm muscles tense up as he pulled me in closer in a consolation attempt that I did have to admit was working very well. "I'm sorry Vixy… I know how much today meant to you."

"That's the first time a guy said that to me," I remarked bitterly.

James started rubbing my opposite shoulder as he pulled me even closer if it was physically possible. "Hey, at least another guy cares about your accomplishments. I gotta say Vix… that was quite the speech you gave us."

"Thanks," I smiled briefly. "I just kinda let the words flow. I didn't really practice that much."

"Really?" James said in awe, making me blush slightly and giggle.

"Yeah, it was all improvised," I admitted, following that with another disappointed exhale.

"What did Garrett do?" James asked after a momentary pause.

"Well, I got angry and told him that I was upset that he didn't show up, then he told me he was done with me and drove away. I take the blame for it though, his mother is sick and he didn't want to leave her. I just… made a mistake."

"It was a mistake for you to even date someone who would break your heart like that," James nearly growled. I was shocked at the way he talked, he'd never get worked up over something this silly, especially with someone other than himself. He never was a very compassionate person, but… it just seemed this instance was different. I could tell he cared.

"It's fine," I assured him in an unconvincing voice. "Really, I'm alright."

James nodded and stood up, immediately I felt his warmth vaporize causing me to shudder slightly. He glanced at his watch momentarily before offering his paw to me, grinning all the while.

"Hey, if it makes you feel any better, Scott is having a little graduation party at his place. You're welcome to come if you'd like."

I hesitated slightly, but realized that turning him down might not act in my favor. Even in the short amount of time I spent talking to him, James showed enough genuine compassion to completely knock Garrett's attempt at the same thing out of the park. He was a close friend, yeah, but the way he talked and acted to me suggested… he wanted to fill that gap that Garrett just created. Sure, James is a bit of a goof-ball and may not take everything seriously, but he proved me wrong that he can be a compassionate person. I never would have guessed.

Plus, getting together with my friends in a private area such as this small party hosted by one of James' closest friends may act in my favor. James is going, so I can count on at least one person to show up that will show sympathy. In fact, James showed me more sympathy in three short minutes than Garrett did in in six months.

I couldn't tell him no.

*Track 7*

I smiled wholeheartedly for the first time in a while as I accepted James' paw. "Thanks James. Maybe going to a little party with my friends will get my mind off of things. I accept your offer."

James grinned and bumped me slightly. "That's the spirit Vix. You want me to give you a ride there?"

"Nah, I think I'll just have my sister drive me," I explained. "She's a bit worried about me after, ya know, all that."

"I understand," James nodded. "I'll see you there then."

"See ya James," I said with faint traces of genuine happiness, watching as he slipped away and out the main doors. I sat back down on the bleachers to contemplate the conversation that we just had, trying to make sense of that and the other crazy events that had transpired over today.

Today was just a crazy in general. First the speech, then the abrupt breakup, then all of a sudden the most popular guy in school asks me to a party? It's too coincidental. Something was up with James.

Then again… I'm one to talk… Ever since James came over, I just… felt happy beside him. Who would have thought of that, right? I mean, I'm one of the smarter girls here at school, I can't say that I'm the prettiest, but yet… James found time out of his day to make sure I was okay. He knew that I was upset and made sure that he could cheer me up. Just that little selfless act of his… I knew we were friends before, but this feeling is a lot more than just that.

Then again, I can't just outright tell him that right away. I mean, who does that? That will just make me sound desperate, what with Garrett dumping me just hours before. I really don't want to sound desperate for a relationship, but I also don't want to wait longer than I have to. It's either I take a chance, or stay heartbroken longer than I need to.

The first step was taking James up on that offer of going to his party.

I immediately pulled out my phone and was instantly on a line with my sister. "Shan? I need a ride."

"Deciding to come home already?" Shannon asked through the speaker.

"No, I actually want you to take me to a friend's house. He's having a party and invited me to come over."

"Oh, really?" Shannon said happily. "I'll be more than happy to take you there. Where's it at?"

"One of James' friends Scott's house," I replied. "James asked me if I wanted to go, and I couldn't really turn him down."

Much to my surprise, Shannon lost her kind and bubbly voice through the phone and replied with a low sigh. "Alright. I'll be there in five minutes."


*Track 8*

Scott's house was on the outskirts of the town, easily half an hour away from the school grounds, so it gave a chance for me to relax and collect my thoughts on the way there.

The sun had set about ten minutes ago, giving the street Shannon was driving on an eerie moonlight glow with the lack of streetlights on either side of the country road. The only light the both of us got was from the dim dashboard of her car or the faint reflections of the moon against particularly reflective patched of asphalt.

One particular reflection gave me a perfect view of Shannon's strikingly expressionless face. Usually she'd be smiling because of this occasion – I was finally getting out of the house for once – but something about her demeanor gave off a particularly negative vibe. It wasn't like her to be openly expressive of her disapproval, even though it looked as though she was string to conceal it.

"Is something wrong sis?" I finally asked, breaking the shared silence so suddenly that Shannon had to think for a response.

"Ya know Vix, I'm happy that you've found something you want to do, and that will hopefully ease that pain your breakup caused, but I don't trust this."

I instantly cocked an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"

"I don't trust James," she blurted out. "He just doesn't seem like a guy you can have complete faith in."

"Why's that?"

"He just seems shady… I don't trust him."

"You're just being paranoid," I giggled. "He's a really nice guy."

"He just has the aura of a criminal," she grumbled.

"What? How?"

"I know one when I see one," she explained. "The first time you introduced me to him, I just… saw it in his eyes."

"Aw come on Shan," I whined. "You can't judge someone like that right off the bat. I've gotten to know James, and he is a really nice guy."

"You mean that you've become oblivious to how much of a criminal he can be?"

My jaw immediately dropped in shock. "Shannon! You can't say that to people you don't know!"

"I don't care Vixy," she snapped back. "He's not trustworthy."

"Quit being so paranoid," I shot back. "You're just being protective of me after what happened later today, but I can take care of myself. I know what I'm getting into."

"Vix–"

"I mean it," I interrupted scornfully. "I like James, and I'm not gonna make the same mistakes I did with–"

"Woah, hold up, what was that?"

"I like James!" I practically yelled at her. "Alright? If you're wondering why you think I'm defending him, it's because I like him. He went out of his way to cheer me up today, and I'm not gonna sit around and not thank him for it."

"There's easier ways of doing that," she said softly. "Falling for a guy, a mercenary no less, just because of what he did is not something you can trust."

"Oh, here we go again," I nearly growled. "What is it with you and not trusting him?"

"I'm trying to look out for you," Shannon squeaked out, unbeknownst to me she had a few tears welling in her eyes.

"I told you I can take care of myself."

"I DON'T CARE!" Shannon screamed in a cracking and horribly faltering voice, clenching the steering wheel in such a way I thought she would snap it off. "I'M TRYING TO LOOK OUT FOR YOU BECAUSE I LOVE YOU! I DON'T WANT TO LOSE YOU LIKE WE LOST OUR PARENTS!"

I couldn't bring myself to speak. I never saw her snap like that.

The ensuing seconds were dead silent. Neither of us dared make a move, or even breath for fear it would spark a chain reaction of potentially dangerous actions. I mean, we were both on edge. Shannon had resorted to crying her fears out, staining her cheeks and even her clothing with her salty tears, while I stayed in silence, unable to comprehend what had just ensued over the past three minutes or so.

It was a roller coaster. We went from a silent happy car ride, to practically screaming at each other, and now back to a silence while we were both steaming and fuming. The still air of our car ride washed back over us, and it wasn't long before Shannon spoke back up to break that mist again.

"I'm only trying to look out for you kid," she whimpered. "I don't want your heart to break again."

"But Shannon–"

"I mean it Vixy," she continued, oblivious to her surroundings. "You're all I have left, and if one wrong decision got you killed, I don't know what I would do… I'm just… forget it."

"No, sis, I–"

"I said forget it Vixy," she snapped. "I'm taking you to this party, but if anything happens to you I swear I'm gonna–"

She was cut off as a loud truck horn blared in our ears. She immediately knew what she did wrong, judging by her expression and the red traffic light overhead. She tried to slam on the breaks, but she was much too late to avoid that same bellowing truck barreling down heavily on our car.

I didn't even have time to scream before everything faded to black.


*Track 9*

Before I even knew it, the darkness that blanketed my vision and consciousness lifted, replaced by a vibrant and painful white only comparable to staring at Solar for hours on end. That blindness failed to go away, but that was the least of my worries. I quickly realized that I couldn't move, yet I felt strangely comfortable and relaxed.

I quickly realized I was in a hospital bed as the memories and thoughts from earlier trickled back to me like a leaky gutter in a spring rain shower. Unfortunately, a large white cast encompassed my left leg as well as my right arm, so obviously the crash earlier was severe enough to crack a few bones. I couldn't move, but then again I didn't want to for fear that one simple movement would cause excruciating pain.

My first worry wasn't about my wellbeing, but about my sister's. That giant truck that t-boned us nailed our car right on the driver's side door, so if anything she got the blunt of the bone-snapping force.

A tall and slender canine doctor stepped into the room with a clipboard, and immediately smiled at seeing me awake and somewhat alert. "Are you okay, Miss Reinard?"

I tried to speak, but instead I let out a subconscious groan as I tried to move my functioning arm. The doctor chuckled to himself and took that as my answer, taking a few steps towards my hospital bed.

"If it makes you feel better, I can assure you that you will be fine with a lot of rest and recovery," the doctor assured, smiling for good measure. "Only a few broken bones and a mild concussion. You're very lucky it wasn't worse."

"What about my sister?" I impulsively asked once I regained control of my vocal chords. "Where is she?"

The doctor stayed silent, taking askance glances all over the room.

"Where is she?" I repeated, starting to get impatient. "Shannon, my sister that was in the car with me? Is she okay?"

"Vixy, I–"

"Is she alright or not?" I snapped scornfully, letting my voice rise with anger.

The doctor lowered his ears and glanced back down at his clipboard.

"There was nothing we could do," he said in a very defeated whimper. "We tried everything… her wounds were just too severe…"

As if my heart couldn't break anymore. It was practically powder now.

Then again, my first emotion wasn't immense sorrow or complete grief.

It was overwhelming anger. An anger I've never experience ever before.

"Who?" I demanded through clenched teeth, metaphorical smoke pouring out of my ears. "Who did this to her? To us?"

The doctor nearly cringed and backed away, placing a paw over the door handle and slowly creaked it open. He said a few indistinguishable words to a person just outside the wall, and within moments the doctor opened the door all the way to accommodate for the eventual culprit of the terrible accident.

I honestly couldn't wait to get my paws on the son of a bitch that killed my sister.

And just like that, my emotions did a complete flip for the umpteenth time today.

"James?"

*Track 10*

The poor guy was devastated, much more than I was to be frank. His ears were flat, his tail was tucked and lifeless, and he trudged into the room with slouched shoulders and an evidently grief-stricken expression. He fought with himself to make eye contact, and my first look into his emerald green eyes showed me that he had been crying for quite a long time.

"Vixy," he said in a hushed soft-spoken voice, as if a kitten were forced to speak. His words after that were incomprehensible, as they just all melted together into one quiet and terribly hoarse and shattered squeak.

I couldn't help but feel so sorry for him. It was my compassionate nature showing up again – seeing my best friend in such a broken emotional state. He looked as though he was on the verge of an emotional breakdown, and if I didn't speak up now he may break down worse than I would.

"Jame–"

"I'm so sorry!" he suddenly yipped loudly, letting a waterfall of tears cascade out of both eyes. "Vixy, oh my god, I am so sorry! I can't believe I did this to you!"

"James," I tried to get his attention, but he was already long gone. There was no stopping him now.

"This is all my fault," he continued, faltering severely in his speech. "I should've payed more attention. I just… I–"

"James, it's alright," I tried to say calmly, but all he did was turn around and stare at me like I had five pairs of eyes."

"I killed your sister Vixy! This is everything but alright!"

"James," I said softly, trying to calm him out of his rant. He stopped momentarily, which was all I needed to reach out with my unbroken arm and gently grasp his wrist. "Really… It's okay…"

"But–"

"It wasn't your fault James," I assured him, gingerly pulling him closer to my bedside. "Really. It was an accident."

"But Vixy I–"

I subconsciously hushed him, bringing his arm closer to me much to his reluctance. "I'm not mad at you if that's what you're worried about," I explained, letting the words roll out of my muzzle. "I'm upset about what happened, yeah, but it was an accident. It wasn't your fault."

James silently whimpered and knelt down to get a better vantage point on myself. I could see the tears welling in his eyes the closer he got, and it honestly broke my heart to see him this upset. I managed to reach out further to grab at his head, then gingerly pulled him into my shoulder to give him a place to let his emotions out.

"You're a mess," I smirked to try and lighten the mood. "You okay?"

"I could ask the same thing to you," James answered, picking his head up to stare at me with an evidently concerned expression.

"I'm okay," I said on impulse.

"Sure don't look okay," he said, chuckling to himself as I realized that was the second time that he said that to me. I giggled back and started scratching behind his ear, which was always something that would cheer anyone up.

"I'm hurt, but believe me, I'll fight through it," I said confidently, grinning at James' expression. I sighed momentarily, which was all he needed to assume I was lying about my condition, which I'll admit, outside of the physical explanation, I was indeed lying to him.

*Track 11*

"I miss her though," I blurted out, and in hindsight I probably should've waited until James was back to his normal self. "It was just so sudden."

"I'm so sorry," James repeated for the umpteenth time, how many it was exactly I had no clue. "Really Vixy, you have no idea how sorry I am."

"I've got a general idea," I smirked.

"Whatever you think it is, believe me, it doesn't amount," he argued, another tear welling up in his right eye, threatening to spill over onto his already tear stained cheeks. "I feel awful. I did this to you."

"It's alright, really," I said to try and stop him from breaking down again.

"No, Vixy, you don't understand," he said, popping up from his kneeling position. "I feel so terrible that I almost killed you. I wouldn't be able to live with myself. I feel bad enough accidentally killing your sister, but… I… I almost killed someone I love."

The hammer dropped.

If my heart didn't stop during that crash, it sure did now.

I felt my jaw unhinge and my cheeks burn and blaze red as James tucked his ears in and turned away, facing the wall in complete shame. It was evident that it wasn't a slip up in his words – he meant what he just said, but it was still so shocking. I mean, the way he said it without even covering his face to signify that it slipped was so sudden and so shocking that I couldn't comprehend what he said at first. I was just in complete and utter disbelief.

"James…" I practically whispered, and in response he only tucked away even further. "Say that again…"

He stayed silent. Obviously what he said was weighing him down, but it was kinda cute how he was so shy about the whole ordeal.

"What did you say?" I asked again.

James let a long, breathy sigh through his nostrils and turned to face me, his cheeks burning just as bad as mine, probably even more in this instance. "I never wanted to say it, but ever since you almost died, I think I have to say it now to get it off my chest… …I'm… I'm in love with you Vixy."

Immediately after blurting it out again, he tucked back away and tried to avoid eye contact. It honestly pained my heart to see him so conflicted and shy, so I did what I could to break him out of that shell despite the shyness in myself as well.

"How long?" the words just flew out of my teeth.

"Oh, shoot, I've honestly lost track of time," James admitted nervously. "I just… never had the opportunity to say anything."

"I've never known you at all to be this shy," I replied, only increasing the luminosity in his blushing cheeks.

"Usually I'm not," he responded, scratching the back of his neck. "But… I don't know… You're just… different than other people… Too many bad things happened to you, but you've always seen the positive in it."

All I did was nod in approval.

"I just don't see how you can see a positive in this though," he remarked, tucking his tail in between his legs.

I smirked into my pillow.

"I see a positive," I countered, getting him to cock his head in curiosity. I reached out, just barely managed to sink my claw into his sleeve, and then gingerly pulled him towards my bed.

"How?" James questioned.

I motioned that same clawed finger to get even closer, implying I needed to talk to him quietly. However, as soon as he got within range, and as soon as I mustered enough courage, I grabbed the back of his head and forced his muzzle into his.

I evidently caught him off-guard judging by his wider-than-dinner-plate eyes and how his muscles tensed up as soon as our lips locked together. He was just as shocked as I was, and although I was pretty sure that it was the painkillers talking, I had no complaints, especially when James recovered from the sudden shock and finally joined in on the affection wholeheartedly. He scooted in closer to get a better angle, but was gentle enough so that he didn't accidentally hurt me more.

As soon as he pulled away, I let out a very lighthearted giggle, and as much as I fought against it, the painkillers won their battle. The last thing I saw before drifting off yet again was James' genuine and ecstatic smile.


*Track 12*

It had been three days since the incident that night fell away from local news and I could finally leave the hospital. I was confined to a wheelchair for an indeterminate interval of time, but that didn't dissuade or deter my daily visits to Shannon's gravesite on the outskirts of the city.

It was a beautiful headstone. I should know, I picked it out myself. It was a wonderful red tinged granite texture, intricately designed and crafted to what I would think she would love. It looked lovely, and there were times that all I could do was stare at it longingly, hoping somehow that the person trapped underneath it would come back.

Just like the previous times, I couldn't withhold at least one tear as it slid out of my eye and down my cheek. I could've sworn another one would have followed suit if the person behind me didn't scare it back in.

"Shannon was a great sibling to you," James blurted out, startling me quite a bit as I wasn't expecting him down here so suddenly.

"She was," I agreed. "She was that parental figure I lost a long time ago. It's just a shame that she's gone."

Before he could throw in his obligatory apology, I placed my paw over his wrist and tightened it gently. "I know, you're sorry, but I already told you it's okay. I'm not mad at you."

"I know you're not," James countered smugly, kissing the top of my head gingerly. "If you were mad I wouldn't be here."

"I know, and thank you for showing up," I said with a grin. "I needed to see you again."

James crouched down next to me and smiled back, wrapping his arm around my neck. A few silent seconds other than the sound of our breaths and the rustling trees later, I finally spoke up.

"Honestly, Shannon told me she didn't like you," I remarked softly, remembering the conversation we had in our car before… well… I don't want to bring it up again.

"How so?" he asked back.

"She just thought that we couldn't trust you," I explained. "I tried to prove her wrong, but she didn't want to listen. She said she was looking out for me, but at the same time she was keeping me from being happy if she didn't let me see you… She said you had the aura of a criminal."

James chuckled quietly and managed to inch closer to me. "Believe me, I know the mercenary business is rough and dirty, but what I'm going into, it's anything but unlawful. I'll be working directly with the CDF, provided that I can get my reputation up once I get a team together."

"I'm sure you can do it," I giggled, nuzzling closer to his face. "I believe in you."

"Thanks Vix," he chuckled back.

*Track 13*

"Hey, if I can do it, I'm sure you can too," I continued.

"Well, yeah, but look at your life," James countered. "You've done so much."

"And that little bit just adds to my character," I grinned. "I've been through a lot, yeah, but every little thing I overcome of survive just makes me the kind of person I am today. You're no exception."

"I guess you're right," he mumbled.

"I'm always right, who are you kidding?"

"No need to rub it in," he laughed back, rubbing the top of my head. "But yeah, you're right about that. One little thing can completely change how others think of you and how you think of yourself."

"Again, you're no exception to that," I reiterated. "Why do you think I fell so hard for you during the reception? You never were a very compassionate person – no offense – but as soon as you showed that you cared about me… I fell in love."

James blushed slightly, which I had to giggle about because he still hadn't gotten over his shyness. "I fell in love with who you were too. You fought through a lot of things in your life… …surely you could put up with me, right?"

I couldn't withhold my laugher that time. "I don't know, we'll see, won't we?"

"I sure hope so," he replied, nuzzling closer to me.

It was just those simple actions of affection just like that that really made me feel complete net to him. Something about how he changed from a care-free, aspiring mercenary to one of the most loving and compassionate people I've ever met just spoke volumes about how much he would go to get me on his good side. And believe me, I was at the top of that list on that particular side.

I pulled him in closer and kissed him gently like I did at the hospital a few days ago, only this time I didn't black out after he retracted his muzzle. He smiled at me like he did that same day as well, only this time I could see it crystal clear. His radiant love just poured out of his smile, so much so that I couldn't keep a straight face. He took the initiative and brought me in for a gentle, consoling hug, rubbing my back for good measure.

"I love you," just slipped out of my muzzle, and I had to admit it felt good saying that to him.

It was just as good as hearing him say "I love you too," immediately afterward.

*Track 14*

After he pulled away, he smirked and glanced at his phone. "I've got an idea."

"Oh jeez, what's your brilliant idea now?" I said sarcastically.

"There's a post-graduation dance downtown, everyone is invited to show up. You want to come?"

I smiled at him and gave him a gentle, playful nudge to his shoulder, which worked surprisingly well since I was in a wheelchair. "Uh, James, I'm kinda stuck here."

"I know," he grinned back. "That's the whole reason."

I giggled at him and shook my head. "Alright, I'll go, but you have to promise me something."

"And what would that be?"

"Will you help me dance with you?" I replied with no hesitation, instantly causing James' ears to perk straight up. He looked down at the ground momentarily, then after a quick exhale, he transitioned his beautiful emerald eyes to me and smiled the most tender and loving smile I've ever seen.

"Deal."