Potter Wins
Summary: Dumbledore sits in his office and tears apart of piece in the Daily Prophet written by Rita Skeeter. And is the epitome of a short story.
Warning: This story contains content not suitable for readers over the age of 6. It is filled with stupidity and very bad humor.
Authors Note: I have no writing experience whatsoever, this story was never meant to be published, read ending authors note to find out why…
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POTTER WINS!
Nov. 2, 2006
Written by Rita Skeeter
According to recent reports, Harry Potter, the boy who destroyed He-Who-Must-
"FOR CRYING OUT LOUD CALL HIM BY HIS DAMN NAME...LORD VOLDEMORT. HOW HARD IS IT TO SAY HIS NAME! SAY IT WITH ME PEOPLE LORD VOLD-E-MORT!" Albus Dumbledore yelled at the Daily Prophet in his hands.
-Not-Be-Named when born and now being called The Chosen One,
"HE IS NOT THE CHOSEN ONE. I AM THE CHOSEN ONE! I AM NOT DEAD! I AM PERFECTLY ALIVE! J.K. ROWLING IS A LIAR." Dumbledore stated, well...er...yelled.
has recently won the Charming Smile Award from Which Witch Weekly. Perhaps we have another Gilderoy Lockhart with us
"HE IS NOT ANOTHER LOCKHART! HE DOESN'T HEX PEOPLE'S MEMORIES AND CLAIM THEY ARE HIS! BESIDE HARRY IS SEXIER THAN LOCKHART!" Dumbledore yelled yet again at the Daily Prophet.
Mr. Potter will receive his award in Diagon Alley on the third Wednesday from next week.
"WHAT? THAT LONG HARRY HAS TO WAIT! THIS IS OUTRAGEOUS! HE SHOULD GET IT NOW! I CAN'T READ ANYMORE OF THIS." shouted Dumbledore once again.
There was a knock on the door when he laid down the Daily Prophet on his desk.
"Yes," Dumbledore called calmly from behind his desk.
"Sir, J.K. Rowling has arrived. She wants to see how you are doing with the rehearsal for your death in Book 6. Should I send her in?" said the voice.
"Yes, give me a minute to rehearse my dramatic death one last time," Dumbledore said cheerfully.
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This is a collaboration with my cousin Blueshadows2010; she said I should post this thing, since it's partly mine and that I also need to become a published writer. I hope she's happy now, though she may be mad that I made Harry sexier than Lockhart where in her story he's uglier. She loves Lockhart, I know I tried to send her to the asylum but she won't budge.
You can also find this story on her profile, where she has added more chapters, which are completely hers. Go check the rest of the story out, that's all the advertisement I'm giving her.