A/N: Firstly, shoutout to Elphaba_anne on twitter (theTbone on here) for bringing up this song that was used way back at the start of the fosters and how much it applies to callie being adopted. I listened to it three (hundred) times whilst writing this. I actually started writing this a long time ago, and the initial path was a sad story about packing up to leave the fosters but...well, we should all know what happened on the finale and I just couldn't write something sad. I couldn't. So, I'm not promising this to be a wonderful story (not that I'm saying any of my stories are wonderful) because it's just thoughts and memories and drabble, but sometimes reflective fics are my favourite to write. So anyway...let's not make this authors note any longer.
Take off your shoes, yeah, you've come a long way
You've walked all these miles and now you're in the right place
The blue duffle bag had been gathering dust in the back of her closet since her return from helens months ago and she had never given much thought to it. The blue duffle bag had followed her everywhere, to every home, to every problem, since the night her mother died. While the contents in the duffle bag changed over the years, she never bothered buying a new one. Years down the line, it's frayed and almost broken, it's tired and old and done with moving from place to place.
The last time she emptied the blue duffle bag, only a few weeks before, she felt a sort of finality. While she'd come to hope that one day the adoption would happen, she'd been sadly hit with the possible reality that it just wasn't in her path. Part of her wondered if that was okay, if she'd be part of the family without really being part of the family and she'd be able to cope with it. They sent her to live with Rita and she packed it up once more; what she figured was one last time.
She traces her hand along the blue frayed material as she packs it with everything she'd brought to Girls United and she feels tears brim her eyes. It's so final and wonderful and terrifying. It's everything she's ever needed and ever wanted, but she's afraid.
This time, the blue duffle bag is going home.
This time, maybe, she'll put it away for good.
Tonight she is Callie Jacob, the foster kid. Tomorrow, she will be Callie Adams-Foster: The daughter. The sister. The adopted, out of the system.
She zips it closed and sits at the edge of the bed, closing her eyes. She thinks of the road she took to get here. Thinks of all the almosts, all of the near-adoptions. Thinks of her family.
"We would like to know how you would feel about making this a more permanent arrangement?"
"You mean, like, adopt us?"
Callie turns to face her brother, always putting his considerations before her own. She smiles, looks up at the other kids. "Are you guys okay with this?"
Brandon nods. "There's enough to go around."
Callie nods. They both nod.
Callie smiles through a fresh wave of tears and wipes them away with the back of her hand. It's a happy sort of cry, happy doesn't even cover it. It's a new sort of cry, a sort that she's never felt before. She'd been so sure that the adoption wasn't going to happen, she'd accepted it now.
This time it feels different. With all of the near-misses, she'd felt a fear in the pit of her stomach that told her the time wasn't right. She knew that it wasn't time all of those times. She knew all those times that she may come out of the courthouse as Callie Jacob and this time she knows that, when she comes out, she'll be Callie Adams-Foster.
She thinks about Stef and Lena, and all those moments they've had together. She never ever thought she could love anyone the way she loved her mother, the way she loved the family she had before the accident. But this family taught her that she could love the same, that she was capable of loving so wholly and overwhelmingly. They taught her that she was capable.
"Do you know that, most of the time, I feel like I have five separate hearts running around outside of me."
Callie blinks through her tears. Brows burrowing in confusion.
"It's you kids..."
She smiles softly and picks up her phone, scrolling through her contacts until she stops at Stef's name, after a moment of thought she touches the edit sign. She changes Stef to mom. And then does the same with Lena.
She's been almost home for a long time now. She's been nearly there, been close but not close enough. She's felt a love for this family, but often hasn't necessarily felt part of it.
She's pushed and pushed and pushed and they've never walked away. They've taught her that they'll never walk away. That they'll never turn their backs. They've taught her that she is and always will be capable.
So capable. So lovable.
"So it looks like we can get in to see the judge this afternoon."
Callie blinks, a little shocked. She stares at the wall, not ready to look at them yet. Not ready for the upset in their eyes yet.
She turns around and they both step forward, both take a hand each, and they all sit down on the bed. She can't speak. Can't breathe.
"We, uh, love you very much." Stef mumbles. "and we would never, in a million years stop fighting to adopt you."
Tears threaten to fall, but she holds them back.
"But if you are tired of fighting and you want to go live with Robert because he's your birth father, then, uh, we don't want you to feel like you're letting us down."
Callie sighs. "It's OK."
"From the very beginning all we've ever wanted is for you to have a safe and loving home. To have a family that loves you unconditionally." Lena speaks, holding her hand tight. "So if that's what you truly want then we will stand beside you, today and every day. Whether you're under our roof or not."
It's been a long journey, she thinks, it's been a tough journey. And although there were times when she thought she could never reach this point, although there were times she felt as though walking away would be easier than fighting and losing all over again, it feels worth it. It feels right.
There's a knock at the door and she smiles at Stef and Lena standing at the doorway.
"You ready, my love?"
She smiles and picks up her blue duffle bag. She's going home.
Do you realize all the falls and flights
all the sleepless nights, all the smiles and sights
They brought you here
They only brought you home