IT'S YAMA TIME MUTHERFUKERS
prolog:
kenichiwa bitches mah nam is yuma kawi an i hev lung purpl hayre wit dese yelow bites in da frunt dat i putt up in a bun wit sum choopstiks in it an eyes date luck liek limpid tears an cheng culor ween eva i emotion an i ware a blu slalor fucku wit a pink ti an lung pink/balck stookins wit blu shus an a gren braclet (OKEY SO SHE DUS NUT WARE DIS ALL DA TIM, BUTT ITS HER MEIN OTFIT SO IM DICKSCRIPBIN IT HER XD) an a fuk toon of peepl tel me i luck liek an anime grill becuz off how kayway i am dats hoaw i gut mah mutherfukin nam an if u donut liek it den dill with it :(
anywheys, evan tho i am kawe, mah leif is vuuuuuuri unkawe. u se, i, liek everon elsa in adventur tim grew up in ooo. i wus bnorned two a pear of humens wit mah reeli desu twin saster fiona, butt den our baka parentsu abended us in da wods an left us two be rased buy dese nekos. noaw, donut get meh rung, nekos r kawi ass fuk (AN IF U DONUT TINK DATE DEN U KEN LEAF RITE NOAW U TERSH NEKOS R SUUUUPAH DESU AN U R NUT SUUUUPAH DESU U R BAKA) butt dese nekos wear difrent. dey culd telk. so anywheys, dey rased meh an mah saster fiuna, butt evertin chenged ween we tundraed fiv. fiina realised date i wus moar kawea den she wus, an she trew dis huuuuuuug bitch fit an convincd our neko perents date i wus eliv an so dey set meh on fir an kiked meh out of der hose an vilage fur lief!
i wus sooo sad.
an i wus on fir witch fukin suked.
so i ren awhey two a diferent metropolitan citi an i livd in da slums an wen frum orfenag two orfenage durin da curse of dese lest ten yers. ass i ruted awhey unsen an unsung, mah saster used her cherizmatic wheys two convin alllll da peeepl of oooo two be eliv! she mad al da vempirs intwo goffiks an used dem ass a ermi two concur da entir werld. she ruled as an eliv dicktator fur da pest ten yers.
butt she wile rul no lunger.
fro twodey, twodey sumtin insid meh hes chenged.
dis mronin, i met dis reeli col old guiy otsid of on of mah locel slums an he sed, he sed...
"yo bitch u wana buy sum wetches?"
an i sed "no u fuker i donut telk two crepi olde guiys who liv in slums im moar kawe den date!
an he sed "god, becuz i donut wunt two sel u wetches. u se, u r nut a nromel humen. u r da cHOOSEN MESSIAH!82686iy!" AN DEN HIS EYS SPIRELED BECKWERDS INTWO HIS HED AN HE STERTED CUFFIN UP BLOD WILE SINGIN NIKI MINAJES STUPID HOE AN HIS RIGHT ARM EXPLUDED AN HIS INSTETINES LEAKED FRUM HIS ERS AN HIS BLOD EVERWARE AN DEN HE DICKSAPEAR AN WUS GUN?
i lened intwo da sput ware he hed stud two investignat an i fund... a KAWAII SWORDD DAT WUS FALMIN AN COVVR IN DESU FLOWWERS AN HAD PICTRUES FOF GREN DEY ON DEM AN SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO KAWII. AN MAID MUSIK NOT SUNDS WEEN I SWUNG IT TRU DA AYR?
an i stud dere, in a pill of dis olde guiys blod, madikal sord in hend, an i relised, i relised it wus tim fro me two taek beck wut wus onc min. tim fur me two sav da kingdum. tim fro meh two...
...kILLLAKILL MAH SASTER.