Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin. If I did, a whole bunch of things would have been different and it likely wouldn't have been as good. That said, enjoy!

Suicide by Reveal! Or not...

It was such an innocent day. Just your typical, boring, ho-hum, overcast day in the mighty city of Camelot. Pretty much the perfect day. Expect for one little thing. Agravaine was in the castle and leaking information to Morgana while simultaneously poisoning Arthur while making it look like he only had the poor man's best interests at heart. Merlin was fed up with the pompous idiot, and the idiots who couldn't see what was right before their eyes. So, he decided to end it. And it had to be flashy, memorable, and get him an interesting entry in the history books. And he knew just how to do it too. He'd bide his time until the council meeting later that day, gather the Knights of the Round Table and Gwen, take them into the Council Chambers, freeze everyone to their chairs and seal their mouths, tell them everything he had done and seen since coming to Camelot, perhaps even with some nifty spell to show some memories to really drive the point home, then release them and let Arthur do what he would. Chuckling madly, Merlin made his way back to his chambers, uncaring as to the fact that he was leaving the work of three servants undone behind him, and began searching for the spell he would need. "Soon, Arthur Pendragon, soon you will know. Soon, you shall see. Yes, yes! Soon, Pendragon, soon my will shall be done!" the warlock cackled as he worked.

/*/

I was such an innocent day. Really! No hunting trips, no bandits, no slavers, no magical monsters, no evil/vengeful sorcerers/sorceresses, no strange plagues, no randomly falling objects, just a regular, boring, ho-hum, overcast day in the mighty city of Camelot. Arthur was actually in a good mood. Until Merlin suddenly stormed into the council chambers followed by the Knights of the Round Table, who for some odd reason weren't allowing into the regular council meetings, and Gwen. "Now! It's story time!" Merlin said, rather too chipper in Arthur's opinion.

"Merlin..." the newly-crowned King began, but a glare from Merlin uncharacteristically shut him up. Though, the iciness of the look, coupled with the fact that Merlin was the warmest, kindest, sunniest person ever and that such a look was at odds with his very being might have had something to do with that.

"Shut up, Arthur," the not-quite-a-manservant growled. Yes. Growled. However, before he could get any further, warning bells rang and the sounds of a typical Morgana attack made there way into the chambers. Merlin scowled, turned on his heel, strode out of the room muttering about 'bloody Pendragons and their bloody timing', and brought Morgana, bound and gagged with chains that just about screamed 'magic!,' to the throne room approximately twenty minutes later. With a whole bunch of screaming and banging proceeding them. Once inside the throne room, Merlin forced Morgana to her knees before him. "Morgana! How nice of you to join the party! Now I get to rant to you as well! And no spoilers! I want this to be as shocking as possible," the slight man said, his usual smile lacking any warmth at all. In fact, it was just a tad bit mad. Morgana was looking at the man as if he'd gone insane, and Arthur found himself agreeing with his mad half-sister. Merlin had finally cracked it seemed.

"Merlin?" Arthur began, a bit more timid than before. Seeing a man you generally wrote off as harmless and stupid with the baring of a king, which Arthur should recognize, does that to a guy. Or woman. There were several stunned maids as well as gents. But we're off topic. Merlin turned his burning gaze on the stunned knights, though a few of them were reaching for their swords.

"Oh we can't have that now can we? No. I want you to hear everything I have to say and I do not like being interrupted. Which is what Morgana, foolish little backstabbing witch that she is, unwisely decided to do. SO... I'm binding you all to your chairs..." it was done, "and sealing your mouths," several mouths snapped shut as the magic took hold, "and now~... I'm going to tell you what, exactly, it is I do all day and just how big an idiot all of you are. Why? Because I'm through! And I'm awesome. So there," the uncaring warlock said, all with a slightly manic grin on his fey face. Then Merlin's grin changed. "Oh yes~! I've just come up with what could possibly be my best idea yet!" he sang, then stole Morgana's dagger, changed it into a cuff, then etched it with runes and symbols that no-one could understand, clasped it around her wrist, ignored her cries of loss, then, with a few words that were sung with mad glee, Morgana was bound to the floor, her mouth removed, while the others were bound to their seats with their mouths sealed. "Ah! Yes. Much better! Now you can't kill me before I'm done. Or worse yet, interrupt me!" Merlin said, summoning a rather royal looking chair and proceeding to lounge in it, that insane grin still on his face. Arthur simply stared at him. If he could, the King would have said, 'you're mad. You know that right?' Alas, with Merlin's spell in effect, there would be no sarcastic quips from the royal peanut gallery. "Now! Where was I before Morgana decided to interrupt? Oh yeah! Story time! Don't worry, I'll bring up refreshments later. You're going to need them," Merlin said, still grinning worryingly. Arthur would have groaned if he could. This was going to be a long day.

/*/

Somehow, Merlin managed to tell his full story, from the time he arrived in Camelot to the present, in six hours. Telling only the highlights and 'big events' might have helped, but it was still a lot and most people found their heads spinning as they tried to understand. The magical illustrations didn't really help with their head aches either. They also made more than a few rather displeased at how Merlin depicted them. They were not that stupid! "And that's why Camelot is still standing, Arthur is still alive, Gwaine's an idiot, Lancelot was a fool, Elyan was drunk, Mordred is to never be trusted, Morgana was actually kinda my fault, as was the dragon, chickens are crafty, and the history books will get everything wrong!" Merlin finished, waving his hands wildly at the end, rather put out that his heroic deeds in saving the idiot king would either be forgotten or twisted beyond all belief. The room was a mixed bag of reactions, but the one's Merlin really wanted were the Round Table, Gwen, and Arthur. To get the full effect, he made a show of loosening their mouths.

"I KNEW IT! And I'm not an idiot," Gwaine burst out as soon as he found out he could. Elyan nodded.

"Not too hard to figure out really. And I'm not drunk. That would be Gwaine," the dark skinned man said, crossing his arms and smirking. Merlin found it rather amusing that he didn't even realize he could move his arms again.

"Lancelot wasn't a fool," Gwen said. Everyone looked at her like she was crazy. "Okay. So many he was a little bit of a fool. But he was a brave and noble fool," she said. Merlin nodded solemnly, accepting this.

"Mordred was that druid boy you helped... right?" Leon asked. Merlin nodded and waved his hand for them to continue.

"And really, you had no choice with the dragon, he played you like a boss! As for Morgana... that was early in your career as Magical Crime Fighter. You were young! And Gaius can be very persuasive, the old wizard. So... not your fault mate," Gwaine chipped in.

"How does this have anything to do with the history books being wrong in the future?" Percival asked. Merlin stared at him.

"I think that's the most I've heard you say. Ever. Well done. Want some more water? Because ale is evil," the warlock said, levitating a jug of water. The large knight nodded and water was obligingly given. "Arthur? You're rather quite. Nothing to say to the man who lied to you from the first moment he met you?" The king looked up at his now-not-so-secret protector with a perfectly straight face.

"Are you my friend?" Merlin quirked an eyebrow.

"What do you think?" Arthur nodded.

"Have you saved my life even though at times you want to shoot me with a crossbow then light my corpse on fire?" Merlin looked at him as if he'd gone mad.

"... Y~e~s... ?" the warlock said, as slowly as Arthur had nodded, clearly wondering if he was still sane. Arthur nodded, took a deep breath, then burst out with,

"It's about bloody time you told me mate! I've been waiting for this day for ages! I've been planning what I'd do when you finally confessed nearly as long as I've known. Lancelot was right, that night before we first retook Camelot from Morgana. You are the one I should Knight," Arthur said, just a little sheepish, though there was a good bit of giddy relief. Merlin was thoroughly gobsmacked.

"Wha... ?" Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table laughed.

"I figured it out within the first year!" Arthur said, far too cheerfully. Merlin stared at him. "I suspected after the unicorn but it was the aftermath of my Questing Beast bite that cemented the idea. When you 'revealed' the Witchfinder was when I was sure."

"Wait... so... you started to figure it out in the first year, but it took you another couple of months to conclusively put it together?" Merlin asked.

"Hey! I still had my father's teachings swirling around in my head! I forced myself not to think on that because... you were already growing on me by then," Arthur retorted. Merlin quirked an eyebrow. "You've spent too much time with Gaius," Arthur said, noticing the eerily similar look on said physician's face.

"Anyone else want to share why they aren't totally shocked I have magic?" the warlock asked.

"Flying plates. I know I wasn't that drunk," Gwaine said with his usual carefree grin.

"Conveniently falling branches, popping up in unexpected places, and muttering to yourself about ungrateful prats. Not hard to put the pieces together Merlin," Leon said apologetically.

"I could feel it," Percival said, skillfully ignoring the incredulous looks leveled at him.

"Just makes sense. And it explains the falling tree branches, unexplainable tripping, and glowing red swords," Elyan said with a shrug.

"You knew my father was well before I said anything," Gwen said softly. Merlin turned to her with a sigh.

"I'm sorry..."

"No. I know. How could I not when you just told us everything?" Gwen said, cutting him off with a smile. Merlin grinned back.

"Hey! There's still a few matters that need to be taken care of!" Arthur called. Merlin nodded and kneeled before Arthur, bowing his head.

"Just do me a favor and make it quick would you? I'd rather not get burned to death," he said. Arthur blinked, shook his head, and said,

"Oh no Merlin. I'm not going to kill you. Though, since you're down there... Do you, Merlin Emrys of Ealdor, swear on your life and your honor to serve Camelot, protecting her and her people with all your strength?" Merlin jerked, gaping at his king. Arthur repeated his question. Merlin frowned, but gave the appropriate response. "Do you, Merlin Emrys of Ealdor, swear to uphold the laws of Camelot and her King so long as you live?"

"I, Merlin Emrys of Ealdor, do so swear," Merlin said. Arthur grinned and moved to draw his sword, only to be stopped by a slender, strong, hand on his wrist. "I, Emrys of Ealdor, Son of Balinor, Last of the Dragonlords, do hereby swear to protect and advise the Once and Future King of Albion, Arthur Pendragon, for all of my days. And let it be known to all men that I, Merlin, Son of Hunith of Ealdor, by hereby pledge myself the friend and protector of Arthur, Son of Ygraine of Camelot, until the end of my days," the warlock said, gazing up at the King with meaningful eyes. Arthur allowed his mask to fall and grinned at his friend.

"So be it. Gladly do I accept your friendship, Merlin. I, Arthur Pendragon, King of Camelot, do hereby dub thee, Sir Merlin Emrys, Knight of Camelot!" the king said grandly. Merlin, a little stunned that he had actually been knighted, stood slowly. Once he was standing, Arthur pulled him into a tight hug. "Now that that's all out of the way... Merlin, would you be my first child's godfather?" Arthur asked. Merlin gaped at him. "Oh come on. You're a Knight now. A noble. In every sense of the word. And my best friend. What's to stop you?" Merlin shook his head.

"You amaze me," the man said, but grinned at his King. "Sure. Why not. Little tyke's going to need some serious looking after and goodness knows you'd be horrible at that. Lazy prat," he said before dancing out of the way of Arthur's grab. The king laughed as he chased his friend, but the growling of Morgana brought him back to reality.

"Okay, fun time over. You, my friend, are going to bed. Agravaine has been revealed to be a traitor, and shall be punished tomorrow. Morgana has been restrained and will also be punished tomorrow. Gwen, I leave you and Leon in charge of wrapping things up here. I'm making sure this one gets some sleep," Arthur said, grabbing Merlin by the collar and shaking him, only just then realizing he could freely move. He put the implication of that freedom from his mind. Merlin's suicidal tendencies were another thing to deal with later. Gwen nodded, then said,

"Merlin? Could you release us before you go please?" Merlin blushed, but nodded and waved his hand. Immediately, the others were released. Nodding, Arthur grabbed Merlin firmly by the arm and dragged him out of the room and to a chamber three doors down from Gwaine's.

"Originally I was going to have you beside beside Lancelot, but the others messed up my plan by choosing their own rooms and Lancelot sacrificed himself, so now you're here. Still, not too far from Gwaine, so you can keep an eye on him," Arthur said as he opened the door. "I've already found someone to help you out. Not a manservant, but someone you can call on if you need it. I've had him look after the room for you, in preparation for this day. Now, you've done so much for me as my manservant, in my pathetically many times of need, so allow me to repay you. Arms up." Merlin was numb as Arthur undressed him, carefully sitting him down on the bed, which was quite a bit nicer than the one he had in Gaius' chambers, to draw off his boots. He was still numb when Arthur tucked him into bed. It had been a rather strange day. He had started the day a servant, spent the afternoon a warlock, and now he was spending the night as a Knight with the king tucking him in. And to think, it had been such an innocent morning.

/*/

When he woke up in the morning, Merlin was a bit disoriented by the comfort of the bed on which he was laying and the light that came from a direction completely unfamiliar. Somehow, his window had been moved and his bed replaced. He sat up, then froze as he recognized one of the generic rooms in the Knight's Wing, a place he was all too familiar with from all the times he'd dragged Gwaine back after a night at the tavern. "Ah, so you've finally decided to wake up, Sir Merlin!" Arthur's voice said from the door. Merlin turned to him, concerned.

"Did you hit your head Sire?" he asked. Arthur quirked an eyebrow.

"Hum... note to self, make sure Merlin sleeps more than three hours a week. It does things to his already addled brain," the King muttered, though there was a hint of a smirk on his face. Merlin shook his head.

"How..."

"You've been asleep for roughly ten hours, Sir Merlin. The servants were all rather pleased with that by the way, once they got over the shock of you being a warlock. Once you've eaten, I have a draft I need you to look over. Something I've been working on for a long time. Something about... accepting magic-users who are proven loyal? I can't just immediately lift the ban on magic, it would look like you'd enchanted me! Even with the testimony of everyone in the council chambers. Some might claim they were enchanted too. So... breakfast?" Arthur went on, suddenly holding up a platter of food. Merlin stared at him, still not convinced he wasn't some malicious impostor. "Come on Merlin. Eat up," Arthur said, sitting down and helping himself. Merlin shook his head, but sat down and began eating as well.

"Why am I in the Knight's Wing, why are you calling me 'Sir' Merlin, and did you get enchanted?" the warlock asked, giving the king a critical look. Arthur looked at the warlock, surprised.

"Don't you remember what happened during the council meeting last night Merlin?" Said young man was going to ask what, again, when he suddenly remembered. His head fell into his hands and he groaned.

"That... was a suicide attempt, you prat, not a request for a Knighting!" Arthur just laughed.

"Well, it failed. Though... if you had done that when my father was king, you'd have been executed within the hour! However, seeing as it's me and I know you... and I've had an idea about just how brave you are and how much you've done for the kingdom... I did the only thing I could think of. Thus, the Knighting," he said with a grin. Merlin groaned again. Arthur sighed and dumped the young man out of the bed. "Now, I don't have all day. Eat! Now! We have a punishment to determine!" Merlin responded with a muttered spell as a rather large amount of water appearing out of nowhere to fall on Arthur's head. Arthur sputtered from the water before sloshing out the door and shaking like a dog to get rid of the worst of the water. Merlin snickered as he eat. Perhaps this wasn't so bad after all.

/*/

Gwaine grinned at his friend as he tumbled into the throne room ahead of Arthur, who had apparently pushed the warlock through the door. "Well look who's up!" he called. Merlin glared and the tankard in front of Gwaine flew to the next table. "Oi!" the usually drunk knight squawked.

"Too cheerful," Merlin muttered before falling into a chair. Arthur chuckled, only mildly nervous.

"Anyway, time for punishment. Bring forth the prisoner!" he called. What followed was both insane, long, boring, and ended with a pouting Merlin. He hadn't been allowed to turn Morgana into a kitten and Agravane into a mouse and then set Morkit on Agramouse. He had so wanted to do that! But no. Avravaine was simply banded and banished while Merlin was told to kill Morgana. And so Merlin's attempt at suicide by reveal ended with two fewer traitors to Camelot, a new Knight, a Court Soc... Warlock, a new law that accepted magic-users who were proven to be loyal to Camelot and willing to serve under Merlin, who was now second only to the Royal Family. All was well until the next big calamity, but even that was handled a bit easier. Merlin didn't have to hide and Arthur could actually make a plan that took Merlin into account and could be pulled off with less trouble and/or bloodshed. As a final note, the prophesy that was plaguing Merlin so much before was totally cheated and Arthur was able to live long enough to see his son named crown prince and find a lovely lady to court. Merlin was never able to get over Freya and have a wife of his own, but he was The Uncle to pretty much all the children in the castle, and a few in the city. Six years after Arthur's son was born, Merlin came back from an herb gathering trip with a ragged little orphan boy. Arthur quickly approved Merlin adopting the boy and named himself godfather. Merlin rolled his eyes at his king, but let the man have his way. Gwaine cried and insisted Merlin find the boy a sibling so he could be godfather to that one. Merlin didn't adopt another child, but he did take on an apprentice. Gwaine insisted he was the apprentice's second godfather. Harridan let the crazy man think that. It was easier for everyone.

/*/

A/N: And that's how Merlin would likely have ended if I owned it. I do not, so it did not. So sad.