The Grudge

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters of Fairy Tail.

"Oi, Loke, didn't expect to see you today," Gray said as he sat down across from his friend at an otherwise empty table near the guild's bar. It had been a fairly quiet day all around, relatively speaking – for Fairy Tail, anyway. "So what's new in the spirit world?" he asked as he raised a hand for Mirajane, who quickly made her way over and took his order.

"Not much," the spirit of the zodiac lion sighed, his spiky ginger locks looking almost frazzled. "You know, same old, same old."

Lisanna waltzed over in the middle of Loke's answer with a frosty tankard and plunked it down in front of the ice mage with a smile before continuing to another table with a drink for someone else.

"Ah," Gray chuckled as he watched his friend take a nice, big gulp of whatever it was he was drinking, then stare pensively into the tabletop. "You look like you're on a contemplative trip."

Loke shrugged casually. "Maybe."

Before the ice-make wizard could say anything else Gajeel appeared and stopped at their table. "Yo, Frosty. You seen Salamander? I need to talk to him 'bout somethin'."

Gray took a drink and eyed the dragon-slayer curiously before replying, "Nope, not today. Anything wrong?"

Gajeel shook his head with a smirk. "Naw. If you see him though, let him know I'm lookin' for him," he finished, before moving off.

Now that the other mage had stepped away Gray noticed the sudden tension in Loke's shoulders and the way he was glaring at the slayer's back, and cocked a brow. "You got a problem with him?" he asked quietly, jerking his head in the direction the pierced male had disappeared.

Loke scowled back down at his drink, then took another chug. "You could say that," he muttered, avoiding the other man's gaze.

"And?"

"And what?"

Gray sighed and rolled his eyes. "Geeze, this is like pulling teeth. You're not usually so talkative," he said sarcastically, snickering when the spirit shot him a dirty look. "So, what's your beef with Redfox, anyway? I mean, I know he's not the friendliest sort, but he's not a bad guy."

Scowl deepening, Loke said nothing, refusing to be drawn.

And that was when the ice mage realized that things might be a little more serious than he'd originally thought. He took another chug of his drink and considered the matter. It was apparent that the iron dragon slayer had nothing against Loke, but for some reason the celestial spirit had a very big problem with him. That was definitely strange – the leader of the zodiac usually got along with most everyone.

So... what the hell's his problem?

He finished draining his mug and when the hazel-eyed spirit did the same, he stood up and rounded the table, before grabbing his friend's arm and hauling him to his feet. "Come on. We're gonna go talk somewhere a little less... nosy," he decided, not allowing Loke to argue the point. "And don't give me that look. I promise, it won't hurt."

Grumbling, nonetheless Loke didn't bother to fight it, because he knew the other man wouldn't stop pestering him until he 'fessed up to whatever was upsetting him. Besides, maybe this was a good thing. Might be that he needed to talk about it, even if only to work himself through his current snit over the dragon slayer.

"So let me repeat myself one more time - what's the trouble?" Gray finally asked as they left the guildhall, both of them with their hands in their pockets as they moseyed along through the streets.

Loke sighed and tried to figure out how to explain to his persistent friend. "You remember when we went up against Phantom Lord, right? Back then, that bastard was with them."

Gray nodded but didn't say anything, a little surprised. He hadn't realized it was such a long-standing grudge.

"It's what he did to Lucy," the lion finally blurted, scowling. "You know, when all that was going on. He really hurt her – almost killed her, from what Natsu told me later." He snarled silently, staring into the distance as they moved easily through the crowds. "I know that was before she was even my master, but still! That's the one thing I can't forgive, Gray. Anyone who hurts her in any way is my enemy!"

The dark-haired man's mouth fell open a little. "Oh. Wow... I had no idea it was over that situation. That was... so long ago."

"When it happened doesn't matter to me, it's that it happened at all," Loke snapped, a vicious growl ripping from his lips as he remembered how he'd come across Gajeel hauling her limp and already injured form off. It still galled him that he'd lost the fight he'd instigated with the slayer in an attempt to save her, whether he'd been dying at the time or not. He'd failed, and Lucy had been hurt even worse because of that. "He deliberately harmed her, went out of his way to cause her as much pain as he could. I won't just forgive that."

"You know he's changed, right?" Gray asked, glancing at his friend's face. "Lucy forgave him, and I know she wouldn't want you to hate the guy."

"It isn't that easy," he insisted sullenly, refusing to meet the other man's gaze. "If it was, then I'd have forgotten about the matter a long time ago, and I haven't. I can't, and I won't."

Woah, Gray thought, he's a little obsessive there. Does he...? "Loke...?" he trailed off questioningly as he came to a stunned halt, and that was when the lion finally looked at him as he also stopped. He inhaled sharply in surprise at the look in that hazel gaze, his own eyes wide. "You... you really love her! All this time... you haven't just been flirting with Lucy like you did all those other girls. You truly mean it!"

Loke looked a little disgruntled at that reaction. "You act so shocked. Is it really that hard to imagine that I might actually love someone?" he asked, pointedly not denying the young man's accusation, thereby tacitly confirming it.

Gray was astounded. Sure, he'd known that his friend cared for Lucy – they all did, after all. She was way too easy to care for. But truly in love? That was something entirely different, and he'd just never imagined that the other man would even want to love someone, let alone admit to it.

"Never mind," Loke deflated after a few silent moments. "Stupid question, right? Of course it's that hard to imagine - I'm the worst, nothing but a playboy." He grimaced and looked defeated. "I guess it's obvious this – love - hasn't ever really happened to me before. Not like this."

Looking around, Gray realized that he'd unconsciously led his friend towards his place and continued heading there, and once they arrived he had him take a seat. He offered the other man a cold beer, and then they got comfortably slouched in their chosen chairs before continuing the discussion.

"Can I ask you something?" When the celestial spirit looked up, he went on, "Do you hate Gajeel because he hurt your master, or because he harmed the woman you love?"

"What?"

"Let me put it this way. Would you have hated him if he'd attacked any other former master of yours?" Gray was pretty sure he knew the answer, but it didn't hurt to ask.

Loke blinked, then frowned. "No," he replied curtly, "I wouldn't. I love Lucy, and that goes way beyond any contracted loyalty to my previous keyholders. Yes, fucking hell I'm infuriated that he hurt the woman I love more than anything in this world." He swallowed some beer, contemplating the bottle with troubled, angry eyes. "Wouldn't you be pissed off if someone tried to kill the woman you love? Would you just get over it and forget about it like it didn't matter, even a long time later?"

It was quiet for a minute, then Gray said, "I'm not pointing fingers or judging. I just thought you might want to talk about it, get it off your chest, that's all. And I understand how you feel – if I were in your shoes, yes, I'd be pissed. Don't think I don't get upset when someone brings all that up, you know? Lucy's important to me, too, and I don't want to see her suffering or injured, either."

"I know. She's important to a lot of people. And I know that bastard isn't really the same anymore, but I can't seem to help it," Loke admitted. "Every time I see his ugly mug, I see her beautiful face marred and pained, and then I'm enraged all over again. For a while, when I heard he'd been invited into the guild even after what he did to Lucy and the others, I lost some respect for Master Makarov. It took me awhile to get it back, to be honest."

"You know how Fairy Tail is. It's practically our motto, right? Everyone deserves a second chance."

The lion chuckled humorlessly. "Calling me a hypocrite? And why not – it's the truth, and I know it. But even knowing doesn't change the fact that I just can't bring myself to give a damn. He hurt her, and that's all I care about. Don't get me wrong, I don't want the guy dead or anything and as a guild member I'd stand with him against anything we came up against, but it's my right to hate him. I'm sure he'll survive my negative feelings towards him without any problems."

Gray cracked his neck and then shook his head wearily. Sometimes Loke could be just as abrasive as Natsu, and as stubborn as Lucy. Speaking of...

"Are you ever going to tell her how you feel? As of right this moment, she's still under the same impression I was until a few minutes ago – that she's just another girl in the crowd to you, another one of your endless, meaningless flirtations," he pointed out. "Leaving her in the dark about the matter isn't really being fair to her, you know?"

"And telling her would be better?" Loke snorted. "I'm a celestial spirit – a tool. Why would she want to know that I have real feelings for her?"

"If I thought you truly meant that insult to Lucy I'd punch your lights out right now," Gray snarled suddenly, glaring a warning at the other man. "The fact that you're a celestial spirit has never mattered to her for any other reason, and it certainly won't when it comes to love. What's more, you know it. So what's this really about?"

Head falling back onto his chair, Loke ruffled a hand through his hair with a deep exhale. "Yeah, I know it," he finally agreed softly. "I guess... I guess I'm just a coward, after all. Even if I confessed yet again, she'd never believe that I actually mean it – she never has before. And of course, that's all my fault," he laughed deprecatingly at himself. "It usually is, for some odd reason."

"You're not wrong... that whole playboy thing hasn't helped your case any," Gray smiled a little, before going serious again. "But I'm also positive that if you took her aside and told her the truth – the whole truth, without a bunch of stupid, meaningless flirting getting in the way – she'd finally give some credence to the possibility that you truly do mean it when you say you love her."

"All that would accomplish would be to make things awkward when she has to summon me, and I couldn't bear that, because after awhile she'd just stop doing so to avoid the discomfort." Loke smiled sadly and his eyes fell closed. "I'd rather have her as just a friend and master than not have her at all," he whispered. "How's that for pathetic?"

Gray huffed a laugh. "Pretty pathetic, now that you mention it," he teased, then sobered. "Seriously, man, you're blind as a bat when it comes to Lucy. Just talk to her, you won't regret it. I'm pretty sure you will regret it, though, if you don't."

"What's that supposed to mean?" the ginger-haired man snapped, opening his eyes and lifting his head to glower at his friend. "You know something I don't?"

"Apparently," the ice mage snorted, "if I have to point out the obvious. How many girls do you know that will wait around forever? Especially when the guy they're waiting on shows no real interest beyond casual flirting? Come on, man, it's common sense."

Loke let his head fall back on the chair again. "I'm no good for her, and we both know it. And she's not waiting on me." He paused, then asked, "So... you got any good advice on how to get past my grudge against Redfox?"

"Oh, no you don't," Gray shot back, throwing an alert glance his way. "I'm more interested in why you're so against telling Lucy how you feel. Is there some kind of spirit world law that says you can't have more personal relationships with your keyholders, or something?"

"No!" the celestial lion gritted impatiently, setting aside his now-empty beer bottle. "The relationship between a keyholder and their contracted spirit is just that – between them. As long as you don't break your contract or willfully allow your master to be harmed, Seirei-o stays out of it. The problem here is that Lucy doesn't feel that way about me, and I don't really feel like being rejected and humiliated, thank you very much. Is that a detailed enough explanation for you, or do you need to wring some more pain from me?"

"Shut it, fool!" Gray yelled angrily as he jumped to his feet and grabbed a startled Loki by the collar, yanking him to his feet and into his face. "Sheesh, listen to you, carrying on like a bitch over this! I'm not gonna let you dishonor Lucy by taking away her choice. So I'm not playing with you anymore. I'm giving you no more than a week to gain some gonads, and then, come hell or high water, I'm gonna make you tell her how you feel. If you don't, I will. And if you try to lie and deny it, I'll kick the shit out of you so bad it'll take you a month in the spirit world to recuperate, you hear me?"

Loke pushed the other man away and glared at him. "Why do you care if I tell Lucy how I feel, anyway? What the hell does it matter if I never say anything to her about it?"

"Are you that much of an idiot?!" Gray shouted in return, now thoroughly incensed by his friend's seeming-stupidity on the subject of the celestial mage that had stolen his heart. "I swear, if you don't man up and she ends up with her heart broken because of it, I'll knock those damned infernal sunglasses off your face and break that nose of yours!"

The zodiac spirit froze as certain things finally began to seep past even his level of dubiety. "Wait a minute. Back up. Are you trying to tell me something without actually telling me?" he asked after a pause, his eyes narrowing suspiciously.

The ice mage threw his hands in the air and turned away in exasperation. "It took you long enough to figure it out, you stupid playboy prince! One would think you had no experience with women, since its taken you this long to get the point."

"No way. Lucy doesn't love me. What in the hell would give you that idea, anyway?" Loke asked, his voice ripe with disbelief.

But there was a very faint sound of hope underneath all the suspicion, and Gray sighed before looking over his shoulder at the other man. Maybe he was finally beginning to get through to his suddenly dense friend. "Just trust me, okay? You know I wouldn't point you in the wrong direction on something like this. I wouldn't even intervene unless I was positive of what I was saying. I want to see both of my friends happy, alright?"

At that Loke's gaze fell away, and he shoved his hands into his pockets with a guilty expression. "Look, I'm sorry for snapping at you. It's just... this is a difficult subject. I'm really not used to feeling this way – this much - for anyone. It... hurts."

"It's cool, man, I get it," he responded, turning and clapping a forgiving hand to the stellar spirit's shoulder. "But don't think I didn't mean what I said. I'm not letting you off the hook – you've got a week."

The lion huffed a weak, reluctant-sounding laugh. "A week, huh?"

"Yeah, that's what I said."

"Fine," Loke finally agreed. "But I hope you know," he added casually, " that if you are wrong about this, I'm going to kill you."

Gray just chuckled. "I know. Oh, and by the way, that deadline is for your grudge, too. You'd better figure out how to get over it."

"Wait, what?" his friend yelled. "Now that's going too far! You've already got me on the telling Lucy thing, but that one-"

"I'm making you tell Lucy about your feelings for her sake," Gray interrupted, "but the grudge thing I'm doing for your sake, Loke. And I'm not going to budge. Believe me, sooner or later you'll thank me for it."

"No!"

"Yes," he returned blandly. "And arguing won't help your case, so you might as well not bother."

Loke sighed in disgruntled defeat.