Life is like a boat in a bottle
Trying to sail you can't with no air
Logan gasped for breath, he felt like he was physically drowning in desperation.
"Rogue, wake up. Rogue, can you hear me? Marie…"
Day by day it only gets harder
Trying to scream but nobody cares
He had tried everything, but her body would no longer absorb his life-saving healing abilities. They had done something to her when they had kidnapped her and experimented on her. They had locked her powers, which was what she wanted. They had also almost destroyed her. Which was, as Rogue herself would put it – so not what she wanted.
He was going to kill them. Very slowly and painfully. He wouldn't stop even if they begged for mercy. That was what he had decided.
Right after he saved Marie. His Marie.
Logan gripped her hand like a lifeline. Funny – she was the one with the fatal wounds, and he was the one who felt like he was dying. Ha. Ha.
"Logan." Charles Xavier rolled into the room. Logan didn't look up. He didn't look away from Marie's face. He didn't let her go. "Logan, I know what you're going through, but you have to know that this is not your fault."
"I could've saved her." Logan murmured. "If only I'd have gotten back when she called me…"
"Logan, nobody could've saved her. Not even you. If you would've gotten close enough you would be lying here with her." Charles could see how hard this was on his long-time friend, and he knew that it was going to be even harder on him if – no, when – the girl was gone. Logan ignored him, leaning closer to Rogue and whispering pleadingly (yes, pleadingly, as remarkable as it seems) in her ear.
"Don't leave me now
Stay another day
With me."
When you're sad
And no one knows it
I'll send you
Black roses
He remembered the time she had been healing from her near-death experience with the personalities trying to take over her mind. He had saved her because he knew how it felt – only he didn't. He'd only felt a machine trying to take over his mind, which in his book translated to one person. Rogue had had dozens of minds vying for control. But she had snapped out of it.
For him.
When she was healing, no one really knew how to confront her. A little while before she had just tried to kill them…only it wasn't her…but she was still inside of herself when – it – had been trying to kill them…
They were confused. Logan could understand that. But he wasn't afraid to try to talk to the bed-ridden Goth. He understood what it was like for her to feel like she was too dangerous to be around her friends. He understood her. And he was the only one besides her little brother (the elf *growl*) who could make her smile. At that point, he thought it was just because she realized that he wasn't afraid of her, that he believed in her. It was only now, now that he was so close to losing her, that he realized that it might have been something more.
When your heart
Is dark and frozen
I'll send you
Black roses
When Apocalypse had gotten Mesmer to take over her mind, her eyes were blank, dull and dark like her heart had been frozen over. He had chased her, but he'd gotten caught up in his war with Saber Tooth. Gambit had been the one who had kept Rogue in the front of his mind. Gambit had been the one who stayed focused. Logan had let his anger get in the way of helping his friend – oh, how he hated that word! – that time. He had let her down.
He would not let her down again.
*Flashback*
Far away we wait for each other
I'm still on that road to nowhere
Logan was on his motorcycle at some pit stop in the middle of nowhere. He'd always told himself that he was a loner, that he was stronger than the others because he could survive as himself in the big, bad, mutant-hating world by himself. But this time, he was uneasy. His animal-like sixth sense told him that something was going to happen. And for some reason, he felt an irresistible urge to head as fast as he could back to the Xavier Institute.
Kiss yourself for me in the mirror
Tie a black rose into your hair
He had been thinking about the last night he'd spent at the Institute, over a week ago. He and Rogue had been on the roof with Kitty and Kurt, looking at the stars for some unknown reason to them all. At some point, around midnight, a shooting star had streaked across the sky. It was green, and one of the most beautiful things Logan had ever seen.
"Logan, oh!, Logan! Look!" Rogue had gasped, directing his attention to it. All four of them had watched it, mesmerized, until it disappeared over the horizon. Gasps of delight and surprise had echoed across the rooftop. Rogue had snuggled closer to Logan's chest, and he'd stiffened instinctively. "Did you make a wish?" She whispered.
Her face was lit up like Logan had never seen before. This was a different Rogue than the one he was used to. There were no walls protecting her, or keeping everyone out. This was Rogue, unabridged.
"I wish I knew who you are." Logan had whispered, lost in the teenager's suddenly bright chocolate brown eyes. She grinned and batted her eyes behind her purple eye shadow.
"Guess you'll have to find out." She said, than she leaned close to his ear and breathed one word, "Marie."
Logan's phone vibrated, jerking him out of his memory. He pulled it out and glanced at the text message.
Logan. Come. I need you. ~ Marie
Logan felt a sudden, powerful urge to rush back and see what was wrong. But against his better judgment, Logan stayed in the area for a few more days, looking for Saber Tooth. Then he headed back. When he got there, he was one day too late.
*End Flashback*
Don't lose your faith
Spend another night
With Me!
Logan touched Marie's cold, pale face. He felt so helpless. All his powers…and he couldn't save her.
No. That was the wrong way to think. He could save her. He had to save her. He just had to think of a way out. A way to save her.
Who was he kidding? He wasn't a strategist – he was a fighter. A jump-into-a-fight-with-horrible-odds-and-no-specific-plan-er. Chuck was the smart one. Chuck should be the one to come up with the plan. But Chuck was out of ideas. Chuck knew – thought – that Marie, his Marie, was doomed. Logan wouldn't believe it. He couldn't believe it. He had to find some way to save her. If he just gave in he would be letting her down. Letting him down.
When you're sad
And no one knows it
I'll send you
Black roses
A vase of black roses sat by Marie's bed. Logan didn't like them. Black meant death and Marie would not could not should not die. They should be red. Red meant love, red meant blood, and blood meant life. (Seriously, Logan should know. He bleeds a lot. ;)) You could always paint the roses red. Logan smiled softly, humorlessly. It was a reference to Alice in Wonderland, a book that Marie had forced him to read just for the sake of seeing him read something other than a newspaper. (And boy had Kitty and the Elf gotten a kick out of that. Logan made a mental note to kill them again when Marie was stronger.)
When your heart
Is dark and frozen
I'll send you
Black roses
Marie gasped, her chest moving up and down faster and faster, like she was suffocating. Logan gripped her hand tighter.
"Come on, Stripes, you got it, you can beat this. You have to beat this. We need you. Kurt needs you. I need you." Logan laughed in shock. "Oh, man I need you."
Ten
Black
Roses
Ten black roses
Ten black roses
"Logan…" Marie breathed. "Logan…"
"Chuck!" Logan yelled. "Chuck, she's conscious!" He squeezed her hand. "Just hang on, Marie. Hang on. Please don't die. You can't die, you can't die. Stay with me, Marie, stay with me, kid."
Life is like a boat in a bottle
Trying to sail you can't with no air
Day by day it only gets harder
Trying to scream but
Nobody cares!
"Her heart rate's accelerating." Charles Xavier said. "We need to get her to focus on something so I can get inside her mind and try to reverse whatever suppression devise they put on her."
"Marie, focus on me, listen to my voice." Logan said urgently.
"Logan!" Marie screamed.
"Marie? Who's Marie?" Kurt asked teleporting into the room. Then he caught sight of the heart monitor. "Oh no." He said.
"Help me, Elf." Logan said. "We're going to save your sister."
"Sounds good. Tell me what to do." Kurt said.
"Hold her hand. Let her know you're here." He said. "Marie, it's us, we're here. We love you. Don't die on us. You can't give up now."
"Ah!" Marie screamed in pain. "I can't…"
"The only thing you can't do is leave me." Logan whispered.
"When you're sad
And no one knows it
I'll send you
Black roses
When your heart
Is dark and frozen
I'll send you
Black roses"
"Why black roses?" Kurt asked.
"Black is forbidden." Logan said. "And I'm forbidding her to leave us."
"Okay. I'm good with that." Kurt said.
"Uhn." Marie grunted in pain. Logan and Kurt's heads snapped to look at her. Her back arched as Charles frowned in concentration. Marie's eyes snapped wide open in an expression of agony. Her mouth opened in a silent scream.
"Rogue!" Kurt yelled. Logan pulled her hand to his mouth and kissed it, her knuckles white under his lips.
"I love you, Marie. Don't leave me now." He whispered; close enough to her ear so only she could hear him.
I'll send you
Black roses
"I…can't hold it…she's not strong enough…I'm losing her, Logan." Charles moaned through gritted teeth.
"Don't let go, don't you dare let go." Logan said to the girl writhing in agony on the bed in front of him. "Kurt, hold her down." Kurt struggled to help the older man hold his sister still. "I'm here, Marie. I'm here."
"Logan…" Marie murmured. "Logan…" She screamed one long, agonizing, final time that tore at Logan's heart, and then she was silent.
Ten black roses
Ten black roses
There WILL be an epilogue!