"I used to be the king here, now I don't mean a thing here, where did it all go wrong?"
-The King, by Hard-Fi
-
"I'm scared-" Her words are fleeting before she is pulled away, and he hangs his head in shame as he is taken away also. What good is telling her not to be afraid, that everything will be fine, when he doesn't believe it in the first place?
He's scared too, as much as he doesn't want to admit it.
Everything's wrong, and he wonders much time he has before his consciousness slips away and he lands in a world of inescapable pain. He hates how normal it seems; how absolutely routine this is. How is it normal that torture is a lifestyle, and pain a mindset? This time, he wonders if he can survive.
He's dragged in, screamed at, tortured, cursed, and then left to die. He made too many mistakes to be forgiven this time.
It's just when he feels time slow down and himself starting to slip away when he hears her enter. Her face is bleeding, and he knows that can't be her only punishment. But her face is all he sees- and he's almost comforted.
"This can't be it-" she whispers frantically, a tear slipping down her pale face, now tainted by blood. "No, please-"
He tries to speak, and can't. His shaking hands reach up to clasp her face, and he takes a deep, shuddering breath. It's too late. Too late.
He remembers the times when he was the leader. Once, he was the Dark Lord's right-hand man; once, he called the shots and made the decisions. Once, he was the one inflicting pain, not the other way around. It all seems so surreal now; now he's dying at the hands of his master, and he is leaving his family behind.
A failure. The words sneak in to his faltering mind, and he shakes them away; what use is there in dwelling on failure now? Dying…
His gray eyes are calm but stern as he gazes at her, trying to communicate everything he feels with his glance. Her tears startle him, frighten him, discontent him; by now, death would be a welcome escape, one he accepts... but her tears…
He's surprised when she apologizes. "I'm so sorry," she whispers. "Everything- all these years-"
It takes great effort to shake his head no, that it was not her fault.
He feels it coming closer now, death, the ever-present enemy. He knows where he's going; his mistakes are too high, his crimes unforgivable, immoral, and cruel. He knows, and she knows too.
Knowing doesn't make it any easier.
Things are forgotten by now, and he is almost gone. Almost… He hates her tears. He wishes they would go away. Why should she cry for him? He should cry for her. He ruined her, even if he had loved her… a beautiful girl, ruined by a boy with dreams too big, too bad, for him to handle.
He's the one who should be apologizing. Selfish.
He's dying, and he's dying fast. Too fast. Gone. He coughs, and his voice is hoarse and weak when he speaks. "I-I- l-love y-you-"
Her eyes are the last thing he sees.
-
For OCDdegrassi. Meant to be Lucius and Narcissa. Obviously AU. Please review.