30 Ways To Annoy Edward
Key his Volvo.
Spray paint his Volvo pink and put 'I'm gay and I'm proud!' on the windshield.
Tell him Bella prefers Jacob over him.
Have Emmett destroy his piano.
Spray paint his locker pink and sprinkle silver, gold, purple, pink, and blue glitter all over it and fill it with pink and purple frizzles and stuff.
Tell him Bella used to have a crush a Mike.
Kidnap Bella.
Tell Charlie Edward got Bella pregnant.
Let Emmett and Rosalie have sex in his Volvo.
Let Emmett and Rosalie have sex on his piano.
Call him Ed, Eddie, or Prudeward.
Break all his CDs (and frame Jacob).
Ask him why he's still alive even though he died in Harry Potter.
Bring Tanya over to visit.
Sprinkle glitter on him at every possible moment.
Accuse him of being a werewolf.
Sing Lady Gaga in your thoughts. (And out loud.)
Sing Britney Spears in your thoughts. (And out loud.)
Tell him you know something important about Bella. Then, mentally sing an annoying song all day long.
Give him a stuffed mountain lion.
Make him eat human food.
Take Bella cliff diving.
Push Bella off the cliff. Walk away.
Tell Tanya that Edward actually has loved her for years.
Tell everyone his home address. Include directions.
Give Lauren, Jessica, and all female students at Forks High his cell phone number and home number.
Tell those girls that he was too nervous to do it himself and loves them.
Tell him straight guys don't sparkle.
Think of him nude.
Accuse him of being emo.