Insufferable Mary-Sues

Nico was asleep in his cabin. He'd been out late the last night so he didn't care that he might have slept past lunch. He'd hidden some food under his bed, in a hollowed out maths books as he knew that no-one would look in there. Nico yawned awake, opening his eyes then jumped back in alarm, yelping. A girl, with black hair and crazy looking green eyes wearing a orange Camp Half Blood shirt – which looked liked it had been be-jewelled up, and a brood grin on her tanned face, stood at the foot of his bed.

"Yay! You're awake!" She chirped, clapping her hands.

Nico was stunned, he didn't know who theHades this person was, but by her (very creepy) orange t-shirt, that she was a demigod. "W-Who the hell are you?"

"Oh? Me?" She grinned, her hands behind her back, making her push her chest forwards. "I'm just, Princess Marina Suezettalina!" she said extremely fast, without a breath.

It took Nico a while to calculate the new information then looked perplexed, "Princess?"

"Oop!" She giggled, "Did I say that? Oh well. Yes. I am. And I am randomly without knowing the Daughter of Poseidon—,"

Nico yelled out in fright and jumped up, "You're one of them! How did you get past the barbwire and lazar alarms?"

She giggled again. She looked scary, more deadly than friendly. "Never heard of a chain saw, have you, Nico?" she lifted up a chainsaw, and nodded up, showing a perfect square hole in his cabin on the roof.

Nico paled. Even though he was pale already, he went deathly white. "You destroyed my cabin to stalk me?"

Princess Marina Suezettalina, swayed side to side, dropping the chain saw beside her. "I wouldn't call it stalking. As I am the Daughter of Poseidon—,

"You're not the Daughter of Poseidon!" Nico practically yelled at her. "You're a Mary-Sue! You can't even spell Poseidon!"

Princess Marina Suezettalina gave Nico a 'Duh' look. "Well that's because of my amazing—," she coughed, as if she didn't mean to say amazing. "—I mean dyslexia!"

I wouldn't call it amazing, Nico thought quickly. He looked round him in panic. He was sure that he placed the alarm button round here somewhere. But, Princess Marina Suezettalina eyed him, hunger burned in her eyes, lust basically smoked off her.

"And you know what that means..." she purred, stepping towards the Son of Hades.

"You're a crazy insane obsessed Fangirl?"

"Besides that, of course," She smirked, her hands out. "I can have you all to myself." And then she pounced on him. Nico yelled out as he fell to the ground, this was the eighty-seventh Mary-Sue this week! Princess Marina Suezettalina grabbed him and rammed her lips against Nico's. Nico rolled them over, so he was pinning this crazy Mary-Sue down.

"Oooo, I didn't know you were so forwards!" She laughed.

Nico narrowed his eyebrows, "No." He said firmly. His eyes finally found the button, and snatched it up and pressed it.

Sirens blared throughout the Hades cabin, as well as the Camp. Red lights swirling round. Nico grabbed the girl and threw her up, but she took this as a brilliant moment to ram him against the wall and kiss him hard. However, the doors burst open at this persisted moment with a crowd all in boiler suits with all in gas mask built in and guns out– which was a lucky for Nico.

"Hands up!" Shouted the tallest person in a boiler suit. "Mary-Sue!"

The Mary-Sue jerked her head round as she pinned Nico down, her hair tousled and her face flushed. "That's Princess Marina Suezettalina!" she shouted at the person.

"Hands up! You have already infected Nico, here! Step away or we'll have to do it the hard way!"

"Never!" That was a bad idea for the Mary-sue as the whole crowd of people rushed forwards with their guns blazing and ruby tackled the girl off Nico. They held her down, handcuffing her as a gun was pointed at her. "Bloody Hades! The infection has started!"

"What's happening?" Screeched Princess Marina Suezettalina, as she was held back, with her arms twisted round her back.

"B-By one touch... By one touch of a Mary-Sue on the skin and any emo-ish and life sucked demigod – preferably a male – you get pregnant!"

Princess Marina Suezettalina gasped dramatically as she could – with a swift throw of her hair back – which made her raven black hair glitter in the red lights. But inside her mind she was jumping for joy. She was pregnant with the Son of Hades child! Who could believe stalking and braking into someone cabin and staring at them in their sleep – what strangely sounds like Edward Cullen life with Bella –would succeed!

After two hours of interrogation with Connor and Travis. They came to a conclusion that they couldn't throw Princess Marina Suezettalina in the full cage with all the other Mary-Sues – which remained them that they needed another cage as the other one is getting full – as she was the first one to get pregnant but touching Nico.

Travis and Connor both glared at Princess Marina Suezettalina, who just sat there filing her nails, flicking her hair back whenever she felt like it was necessary. Her stomach was bulging. Just by two hours, she was at fully pregnant. It astonished the Stoll brothers, but on the other hand they wanted to throw her off a cliff as they she kept flirting with them and making both boys very flustered and stutter, just by throwing a wink at them. But, just in time as Connor was on the bridge to faint, Annabeth burst into the room.

"We've got a problem!" she announced, seriousness in her voice.

Travis's voice came out high-pitched as his face became redder. "W-What is it?"

"This was all a part of the spontaneous Prophecy that just came in!" Annabeth said. "And this is why we keep these morons out of the camp."

"J-Just tell us!" Travis said, his voice still high pitched.

Annabeth growled at the boys. She had left them two because they begged her to let them do it. And reluctantly, she gave in. Just then, Connor fainted, and Princess Marina Suezettalina giggled.

"The idiot," Muttered Annabeth, "But back to the point. This child is a part of the Prophecy!"

The Mary-Sue dull and bored voice spoke: "And?"

Annabeth stormed forwards to the table and smack her hands down as hard as she could. "And this means you're an idiot! The Prophecy says that this child will bring the world to the doors of death!" She said.

Princess Marina Suezettalina took a moment to take this in, her hand pausing in mid-motion of filing her nails. "And that's bad?" she seemed completely clueless.

Annabeth yelled out in frustration. "You're insufferable! This is why we set up alarms and barb wired all of the cabins!" and stormed out.

Travis still stood there, like a bubbling idiot, his face all flustered. And then he fainted next to his brother.

This is what I do when I actually start thinking.

I hope I actually got the real PJO characters in character. If they're not, tell me and I'll change it!

Hope you like it.

August.