Chapter 1

It was a dark, stormy night. Wilbur and Violet were TOTALLY DIGGING the Justin Bieber concert.

"We're here!" Wilbur yelled. "This is going to be soooooooo fun!"

"I know right" said Violet.

As they came to the concert, Wilbur almost peed his pants when he saw Justin Bieber's gorgeous, sexy face.

"OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG!" Wilbur exclaimed.

"He's so hot!" Violet said.

Violet and Wilbur were TOTALLY DIGGING the song (Boyfriend), until there was a 10-minute intermission.

A 3-year-old boy came out of nowhere and threw a piece of crap at Violet. "OW!" Violet screamed.

"GO DIE IN A HOLE" the boy said in a dark, sexy voice.

Violet picks up the piece of crap and opens it up, finding a piece of paper rolled up inside. She unrolled it and the paper said:

sOmEtHiNg bAd iS gOiNg tO hApPeN

I lost my family, Violet thought, and I lost my cat, too. I don't want to lose Wilbur!

"Hey, honey, I'm gonna go to the hot dog stand," Wilbur said.

"k" said vloit in a gooby voice

As Wilbur was in the hot dog line, he thought, Man, I want to be just like Justin Bieber.

Wilbur LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVED Justin because:

1. He was HAWT

2. He dated older women

3. Everybody loved him

4. He was Canadian

5. He farted the best farts.

Then Wilbur screamed out, "I LOVE JUSTIN BIEBER!"

Everyone in line thought he was high.

"Are you high, little boy?" a random old lady asked.

"NO FUDGE OFF YOU" scramed wiblur

Maybe I should start dating older women, Wilbur thought.

Then all of a sudden...

A strong wind blew by as Wilbur saw the shadow of a person. He couldn't see their face, but then...

A beautiful, gorgeous figure appeared in front of his eyes.

Her stare was holding, ripped jeans, skin was showing. Hot night, wind was blowing.

Wilbur grabbed her hand and said, "WHERE YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING, BABY?!"

The person turned around and looked at Wilbur. She's so beautiful! She's so gorgeous!

Until...

SLAP!

The person slapped Wilbur across the face.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHH!"

Wilbur lay on the floor, crying for the next two hours. When he finally stopped, he looked up at the old woman above him.

He imagined her clinging on to a pole, wearing a sexy, see-through lingerie. She was dancing erotically to "Love is Blindness" by Jack White. 273402834394 gallons of blood shot out of Wilbur's nose.

Then it returned to normal.

"Dude, are you on your period?" the woman asked.

"NO!" Wilbur shouted. "I had my period last week!"

"Good job!"

"Who are you?" Wilbur asked.

The woman flipped her hair back like a goddess. "My name is EDNA!"

Wilbur gasped. "Will you, like, GO OUT WITH ME?!"

Edna just stood there. "...HELL YEAH!"

Edna carried Wilbur, and together, they ran away into the night.

Meanwhile...

The concert ended, and Violet was waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And waiting.

"WHERE is WILBUR?!/!?" Violet screamed.

Then, Bob from the Outsiders came and saw Violet. "Are you okay?! Wait...HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYY!"

"HEY GURL HEY!" Violet said.

"Do you want to come with me to MCDOLAN'S?" Bob asked.

"Well, I'm kind of on a diet, but for you...ANYTHING!" Violet said.

"Anything?"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNN NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNN NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!"

"kk bb" Bob said.

And together they went to McDolan's. They got there, and they order 500 Secret Sauce burgers.

Dolan, the owner of the restaurant, whispered to Bob, "bros b4 hoes"

"Does this mean...I'm...GAY?" Bob asked.

Bob saw Lewis (AKA Wilbur's dad) and grabbed him by the waist, and started salsa dancing with him. "OLE!" bob said

"I have a wife, but EH!" Lewis said.

For the entire night, Bob and Lewis salsa danced to "The Best Song Ever" by One Direction.

And then Bob left Violet alone.

"I'm not THAT ugly, aren't I!?" Violet asked.

"yes u r" said dolan.

THE END