It was Christmas Eve of 1944 and she was just starting to lose hope. She'd written countless letters, each one on her very special stationary reserved only for him. She hadn't heard from him in over a year. She knew things were rough. She couldn't exactly blame him for not answering her letters when he was busy saving humanity from those monsters. He made a vow to keep his people safe and that is what he's been doing for the last three years, five months, three weeks, and four days... Not that she'd been keeping track on a calendar or anything... She really missed him.

Sometimes she would turn on the radio to lift her spirits, although more often than not here program would be interrupted with breaking coverage about the war. "We interrupt this program with more devastating news on the second World War. As you know, German dictator..." She usually turned off the radio at that point.

Currently she was sitting in front of the fireplace, wrapped in a thin blanket. She watched the snow fall through the window and thought about how her first White Christmas should have been spent with him by her side. He could have helped her decorate their home with holly and tinsel, and he could have been the one to put the star on the tree. He could have drank hot cocoa with her as they listened to the firewood crackle, and he could have stopped out the embers before they ruined the carpet.

And she could have answered the door the first time there was a knock but she was so immersed in her thoughts that it wasn't until there was a third knock that she came to. She stood up from the sofa and straightened out her dress and hair in case her company happened to be one of her friends or the bill collector.

She spoke as she opened the door, "So sorry that I didn't answer right away, I was just-" As she laid her eyes on the figure standing before her she could feel her palms sweat and her throat catch. There was a strange feeling in the pit of her stomach.

It was Christmas Eve of 1944 and her hope was fully restored. There he stood in all his patriotic glory. Captain Levi Rivaille of the US Army, fiancé of Hanji Zoe, and home for the holidays.

"L-Levi..." she breathed.

He gave a little smirk before saying, "Well are you gonna let me in or am I gonna stay out here and freeze my butt off?" She stood to the side of the door with her arm out, welcoming him into their home and shutting it behind him. "You know it's less than twenty degrees out there."

"Oh Levi... I can't-" She paused. She could feel her throat catch again. She still needed a moment to take this in. When she seemed to calm down a bit she continued. "I can't believe you're here. You're here and you're alive. You're still all in one piece and you're here. I was so worried!" There it was yet again. Inevitable. "Levi, I was afraid. Afraid that they'd found you out and captured you. But they didn't and you're here. I wrote to you so many times. How come-" She took in a breath. "How come you never wrote back to me? I was so scared. I thought I'd lost you forever."

As Levi entered his home he took in all his surroundings, waiting for Hanji to finish. He noticed a new ornament on the tree and could recognize the faint scent of peppermint in the air. When he turned to look at her she had finished her questions. Without saying anything he sat on the sofa and patted the spot next to him. When she sat he pulled her into his embrace and held her tight.

"Hanji, I did write to you. I wrote one letter for each one that you wrote me. We didn't have many chances to send them out so I just held onto them hoping I could send them all to you at once when the right time came. Unfortunately when they finally got to the postman, he met his untimely demise, along with everyone's letters and keepsakes."

"That's awful... Just can't believe you're really here. Are you hurt? Were the medics any good? Are you hungry?"

"Hanji, stop. Just... Just let the time we have together be spent in a way we won't regret. I just want to be here with you and your warmth. I... I don't want to think about the war right now. It's too much." He looked away but his grip on her hands tightened.

"I understand. In that case, let me feed you. You look like you haven't eaten anything in weeks."

"That may be true but it's nothing compared to what they are going through." His expression looked far away. Suddenly he snapped out of his memory and looked back at his fiancée. "I'm sorry. I am hungry though." He put on his best fake smile that was too grim to reach his eyes. She understood. Despite being home for Christmas, he was still in a bad place.

After they finished eating dinner they spoke more about their past year away from each other. Levi made many friends and lost most of them over time. Hanji would occasionally invite the orphans around her neighborhood over for a hot meal and a warm bed for the night. Levi lost an entire squad in moments. Hanji became a private tutor to the orphans, mainly teaching them basic grammar and writing skills. Levi was one of very few who were blessed with a short term leave from the war that wasn't the result of a severe injury.

"Levi?" He looked up at her and waited for her to continue. "You're filthy," she chuckled. "And you're still shivering. Why don't you go and take a hot shower and meet me back over here. I can get the fire ablaze again and we can snuggle."

"A shower would be nice. I'm going to hate having to go back to having to wash from a dirty bucket."

Once Levi was under the hot water Hanji set out his pajamas from before he left. She collected his uniform from the bathroom floor and set a towel on the counter after it sat on the radiator for five minutes.

When Levi returned to the living room, his hair freshly combed and barely damp now, he was met with a medley of blankets spread out on the floor in front of the fire place. There was a tray of cookies and two mugs of hot cocoa on the coffee table. And last but not least, Hanji sat in the center of the blankets, she shed her Christmas outfit and dawned the silk nightgown he'd bought her just before he left.

"I have to give you your Christmas present," said Hanji as Levi sat next to her.

"In that case, I should give you yours." He reached for his duffle bag that was next to the couch still and pulled on the drawstring. "I saw it and I thought of you..." He handed her a leather bound notebook. She opened it and immediately sniffed it.

"This is wonderful," she said as she exhaled.

"I will never understand your unrelenting need to sniff books."

"You hush." She flipped to the very first page. There was a small message from Levi.

"Hanji, if this gets to you before I do then you know what has happened. However if I've just handed it to you then that's good. I know you love to write, and sometimes a quality journal is hard to come by. I hope that this will suffice. Take good care of it and there may be more where this came from. Also, if I haven't brought it up yet, there are some things that I hope will happen tonight. I'm most likely thinking about it as you read this but am much too shy to actually say anything.

PS. You're on my mind every day that we're apart.

-Levi"

When she looked back at Levi his face was beet red. He'd probably just remembered what he wrote.

"It's perfect," she said with a small smile and a hint of blush creeping over her cheeks. "And that PS. might be working in your favor to get you everything you want for Christmas."

"Is that so?" Levi asked as he took the journal from her and set it aside. He snaked his left arm around her waist as he leaned over her, using his right hand for support. As he laid her on her back he could see the blush creeping from her cheeks down to her chest. As he began leaving small kisses and pecks along her neck she placed a delicate hand on his cheek.

"The night's not over yet, Levi. I still want to give you your gift." Once they sat back up, she crawled over to the Christmas tree a few feet away, grabbed a gift, and pushed it toward him. "Open it."

It was a large box wrapped with bright colorful paper and a large red bow on top. He sighed contently as he opened it. Inside the box was an array of items. Three pairs of blue socks, a long black scarf, and a sweater, each item knitted from thick yarn. The socks ans scarf were pleasant and easy on the eyes. The sweater however, was as bright as the bow that was used to wrap the gift in the first place. On top of the red background were dozens of white snowflakes and Christmas trees.

"Oh, Hanji... you really, genuinely should not have done this." said Levi with a smirk as he set everything aside.

"Are you telling me that you don't like your sweater? That I spent countless hours knitting? I'll have you know I endured cramping hands from making that." Hanji couldn't even maintain a straight face as she feigned her disappointment.

"How can I make it up to you?" he murmured as he pulled Hanji onto his lap.

"By letting me give you your birthday gift now."

"A couple hours too early?"

"Be quiet," she giggled before sealing his lips with hers.


Before long, the blankets were ruffled, their pajamas were discarded, and the fire was now a glowing heap of ash in the fireplace. Two bodies lay huddled close together for warmth under a thick quilt.

As the effects of the evening were starting to hit them, their eyelids became heavy. A complaint of coldness roused Levi out of his near sleepy state and he got up to stoke the fire. When he returned they each coiled around each other closer than before.

"I love you, four eyes," Levi whispered into her hair once he was sure she was asleep.


"What are you doing awake?" Hanji asked when she couldn't feel his warmth next to her.

"Couldn't sleep." She could see the silhouette of his form sitting in front of the fireplace.

"What time is it?"

"Almost four."

"I'm cold," she wiggled her body until one of her legs came out of the blanket and promptly touched one cold foot to his bare back.

"Stop that!" he hissed as he shook himself away from her.

A long period of silence passed before either of them spoke again.

"I'm leaving on the first."

"Couldn't you stay for just a bit longer?"

"You know I can't. You should be thankful that we get these few days together. It's a mess over there, Hanji, and this war's not gonna end until we make it end."

"I understand. Just... just promise me that you'll come back again."

"I can't do that, Hanji. I can't give you false hope."

"Then will you just do your best to try to survive? Please?" her voice shook.

Levi turned around to see Hanji with tears threatening to come out.

"I will." He lowered himself to kiss her on the forehead and stroked her hair. "I will try... Now go back to sleep."


Later that morning when she would wake again, she would find out that he was gone with no explanation. What she wouldn't know is that he wouldn't return.