Amazing…this one has a title! But, I must inform you that these wonderful characters are not mine. ::Sigh:: But! I do hope you like the unusual things I do to them. Always feel free to leave commentary.



Detroit Kiwi



"Fuck…" Saionji growled and sat up in his sleeping pallet. This was the third morning in a row he had woken up to the booming sounds of the 'Ghetto Anthem' from his downstairs neighbors.

Deciding he wasn't going to get anymore sleep this morning he stumbled into the bathroom and took care of the usual hygienic procedures.

Saionji stared at his reflection in the small bathroom mirror and sighed. He had forgotten to take off his eyeliner last night and now it made a black circle around each of his eyes.

He quickly grabbed a washcloth, got it wet and rubbed at his eyes vigorously until the washcloth was almost entirely black.

"What are you doing?" Came a slightly groggy, but still silky voice from the bathroom doorway.

"Go away," Saionji growled.

Touga shook his head and made his way to the cabinet under the sink. He retrieved a small container of Vaseline and handed it to Saionji.

Saionji looked at the little tube skeptically.

"It has more than one use, Saionji," Touga said simply and wandered off to the kitchen.

Saionji looked at the Vaseline a little longer then, experimentally, he dabbed a dot onto a corner of the washcloth and wiped at his eyes. Magically the make-up came off much easier, so he used this method to remove the remainder of the persistent eyeliner.

"Hm." Saionji huffed and put the Vaseline away, then followed Touga's path to the tiny kitchen.

Touga turned from the gas stove to see Saionji open the refrigerator.

Looking up from his rummaging Saionji answered with a rough, "What?"

"You have a glob of Vaseline…" Touga reached over and wiped the goop off Saionji's eyelid.

"Stop that, you fucking queer," Saionji growled and wiped at his eye.

Touga raised an eyebrow, "And who's the one fucking the fucking queer, Saionji?"

"Shut up," the green-haired one retreated back to the bedroom.

"He is so Detroitian," Touga seemed amused. "Why did we never notice it before?"

"It's not as if I like being here," Saionji came out of the bedroom. "I had no where else to go."

Touga shrugged, "Me either. Who would have thought my family would desert me that way…"

"Why didn't you stay with Miki? You two seemed to get along," was the spiteful response from Saionji.

Touga gave a dismissive wave of his hand, "He was just a fling. I've known you much longer. We're best friends, remember?"

"Huh," the other turned back into the bedroom.

Touga watched after Saionji as he left then he turned his attention back to the eggs in the frying pan.

"Why is my life such a fucking soap opera?" Saionji muttered as he started changing from his nightclothes to his normal daywear.

A canary chirped loudly from it's still covered cage.

"Shut up, Turkey!"

The cloth on top of the cage was pulled violently off and then thrown across the room where it fluttered harmlessly to the floor.

"Why do we even have a fucking canary?"

"Because it's cheery," came the reply from the kitchen. "Unlike some other people that live in this ghetto apartment."

Saionji just growled to himself. It was useless yelling at Touga to shut up, he realized. Touga would say what he wanted no matter how much Saionji snapped at him.

"Could you do me a favor and stop off at the grocery store on the way home?" Touga poked his head into the bedroom.

Touga received a fierce glare from the former Kendo Team Captain, "Would you go away? I'm trying to get dressed."

"It's not as if I've never seen you naked, Saionji," Touga leaned casually against the wall outside the doorway and stared pointedly at the grumpy 'kiwi.'

Finally fed up with Touga's insolent attitude, Saionji stormed over to the cocky red-head, took hold of both his wrists, and pressed them against the wall on either side of Touga's head.

Touga smiled, "You know what this reminds me of?"

Saionji only scowled at him. He didn't really want to know the answer.

"Last night," the smile turned a shade slyer. "Only…we were on the floor. You were angry at me then, Saionji."

"You had better not be thinking we're going to end up like that every time I get mad at you." The reply was rough and nearly growled.

"No," Touga answered lightly. "I was just trying to get you to forget why you were mad at me."

"Well, it didn't work, did it?" Saionji pressed Touga's wrists into the wall harder.

Touga winced slightly, but continued, "So then, tell me why you're angry."

Without any warning or notice, Saionji leaned forward and captured Touga's mouth in a rough kiss. Smiling to himself, Touga returned the kiss pushing his tongue into Saionji's mouth and making him do the same. Saionji slowly grew more involved with the kiss and Touga had a grand time with it despite the fact that his arms were pinned to the wall.

The canary chirped happily.

In an instant Saionji let go of his red-haired companion and prowled into the bedroom to silence 'the turkey.'

With a small quirk of an eyebrow and a half smile, Touga returned to the kitchen to check on his eggs that were still busily sizzling away in the pan.



While Touga sat at the flimsy blue card table eating his eggs off one of their three plates with a plastic fork, Saionji wandered out of the bedroom clad in his normal, everyday Ghetto Wear.

"Why don't you get some jeans that aren't torn?" Touga suggested before eating the last of his eggs.

Saionji opened the cabinet to check if there was any ramen left, "Value World doesn't have any jeans my size."

Touga laughed, "We aren't destitute, Saionji. Why don't you at least go to K-mart? It isn't that far away."

"The car is out of gas," Saionji responded switching from the cabinet to the refrigerator.

"What?" Touga got up to drop his dishes in the sink. "The Akio-car can't run out of gas!"

"Look," Saionji closed the fridge and turned to face the incredulous redhead. "For the last time: it's not an Akio-car. It's just a plain, old, fucking Jaguar."

Touga took Saionji's face in one hand, "I know. I just think it's amusing to see you get so uptight about it."

Saionji angrily batted Touga's hand away, "You're such a bitch sometimes."

"That's better than you who's a bitch most of the time," Touga retorted.

"Well, if you hate me so fucking much why don't you get in your fucking car and drive somewhere else?!"

With a sigh and shake of his head Touga turned away and left the kitchen. "Why do you always have to fight me, Saionji?"

"Fuck this shit," Saionji grumbled. "I'll get something to eat on the way to work."

"As if that mundane car wash could be called a job," Touga muttered as Saionji slammed the door shut.



Down in the parking lot Saionji unlocked the door to the Jaguar XK8 and for a moment was startled by its amazing similarity to the Akio-car. He quickly shook off the déjà vu and slid into the driver's seat.

After turning on the car and glancing over the gauges he guessed that there was enough gas to get him to a gas station. Maybe he could stop at the BP station on the corner for gas and something to eat…



Saionji arrived at work a little happier than he had been when he'd left the apartment. As it turned out, going to the BP station had been a good idea. The gas prices had dropped to $1.69 instead of the usual $1.75, and there had been a sale on day-old donuts, which were still good despite their age.

The manager at the car wash, however, was not quite so happy.

"Kyoichi," he crossed over to Saionji who had just come in. "Why aren't you wearing your work shirt?"

The kiwi blinked and looked down at his shirt. It was one of Touga's gray T-shirts. In fact…judging by the orange Faygo stain that was on the left side, that he had put there himself, it was the shirt Touga had been wearing yesterday.

He frowned. Was everything going to remind him of last night?

"Are you going to answer me?" Saionji's manager growled.

Saionji shrugged, "My shirt is dirty and the washing machine in the basement is broken."

"Then go to a Laundromat, you fucking idiot," his manager snapped.

The manager was a short man, and not very well built. It looked as though he spent most of his spare time staring at a TV screen from a La-Z-Boy rather than devoting it to actual living. Saionji guessed he could take the man down easy enough with a few good punches. If only he had is Kendo sword on him…

Then again he didn't really need to be getting fired again for beating up his boss because of hostile words. Touga would have a good laugh at him if he ended up looking for yet another dead end job on a rapidly shrinking list.

"Look," Saionji calmed himself. "I'm sorry. Just let me go to my locker in the back room, I've got a spare shirt in there somewhere."

The manager crossed his short, pudgy arms. "You'd better. Once you have your shirt on get your ass out in the washer."



Back in the employee locker room Saionji cursed himself. "I'm getting all soft and shit." He stopped abruptly in front of a locker, "I don't care what Touga says, giving in once just makes way for more fucking weaknesses to come in."

Saionji decided to derail that train of thought before he got too irritated to work. So, calmly he opened the lock-less metal door and pulled out a rumpled, slightly damp shirt.

Now completely composed, he peeled off the gray T-shirt and was getting ready to toss it into the locker when he stopped himself. For a moment he stared at it then, off-handedly, he brought the shirt to his nose and sniffed it carefully.

A small smile dawned on his face, "It still smells like him…"

There was a moment of silence in which the smile fell from Saionji's features. "Damn you, Touga!"

The shirt was violently thrown into the locker and the door was slammed shut before Saionji yanked on his work shirt and stormed out to the car wash line.



It was the end of another day for Saionji and he walked tiredly out to the waiting Jaguar. He had always wondered why the people in Detroit had terrible living conditions, but good cars. Not so long ago he had determined it was probably because they manufactured the cars in the city.

"Fucking stupid people today," Saionji grumbled as he pulled his car key out of his pocket.

While normally he would have gotten into his car and went on his merry way, tonight he stopped as he was opening his car door and thought about what he had just said.

"Why do you have to curse all the time, Saionji…" Saionji muttered to himself, he made a defiant face. "Why do you have to judge me all the time?"

Once again Saionji stopped talking and realized that he was having a conversation with himself out loud. It was just that every little thing about Touga was getting to him today, and Saionji refused to believe it was because they had slept together.

/Sleeping together once wouldn't change me this way…/

Deciding that standing next to his car probably made him a prime suspect for a drive-by shooting, Saionji quickly got into his car and closed the door behind him. Saionji figured that if he wanted to sit and think, he was going to do it in the safety of his car: his locked car.

Finally giving in to what he had wanted to do all day, Saionji closed his eyes and thought back to last night and the events that had led up to it.



***



The door to Saionji and Touga's run-down apartment opened and shortly after Saionji himself stormed in and slammed his keys down on the blue card table that served as their dining platform. Touga followed suit, only much more calmly and he quietly closed the front door locking it after he was sure it was securely shut.

"There's no reason to be so angry, Saionji," Touga remarked calmly as he sauntered to the kitchen to get a drink. "You're not the one who got Orange Faygo splashed on you."

Touga had to smile at that memory. He had never realized he could irritate Saionji so much, and what he had said wasn't even anything that he would consider aggravating.

Saionji stalked out of the bedroom where he had kicked off his shoes and taken his socks off. "Look, Touga. You don't go saying that shit in public. I don't care if you are kidding."

"Why do you have to curse all the time?" Touga turned his head slightly to look at Saionji a moment, and then he turned his attention back to pouring his drink. "Besides. I wasn't kidding, I really meant it."

The green-haired young man scoffed and leaned against the wall, "I don't want that from you anyway."

After he had finished pouring his drink, Touga placed the Faygo bottle back on the refrigerator and shrugged, "Well, that's your loss then as I'm offering it freely."

"What do you think I am?" Saionji shouted and banged the kitchen counter with his fist. "Do you think I'm like those little sluts from Ohtori? The ones who would do anything to be with you for one night?"

"No, I don't," Touga replied calmly and sipped from his plastic cup. "I like you and I want to share the experience with you."

Without warning Saionji turned away from Touga and walked a few steps towards the bedroom, "Well you can forget it. I don't want that from you, and you're not going to get it from me."

Touga calmly shrugged one shoulder, "Have it your way, Saionji."

"I will, thank you," Saionji said over his shoulder, then tromped off to the bedroom without stopping in the bathroom to wipe off his eyeliner.

From the bedroom Touga could hear rummaging and the canary chirruping happily at having someone in the room with it. A few moments later the canary noises stopped and Touga assumed that Saionji had thrown the blanket over it so the bird would sleep.

A few more minutes passed and Touga had long since finished his drink. He figured that Saionji would be on his sleeping pallet trying in vain to doze off when he was still so worked up about the evening.

"A perfect opportunity…" Touga smiled to himself, placed his cup in the sink and went to the bathroom where he took his time before going on to the bedroom.

Saionji tried to ignore the fact that Touga was now in the room getting ready for bed, which for him consisted of stripping down to nothing and crawling into his sleeping bag.

"Good night, Saionji," Touga said over his shoulder before snuggling his head down into his pillow.

Several minutes passed and when Saionji was sure that Touga had gone to sleep, he turned over on his more comfortable side, which happened to be the side that made it so he was looking at Touga on his right.

"Can't sleep either, can you Saionji?" Touga's quiet voice floated to Saionji's ears, which startled him despite the softness.

Once his eyes had further adjusted to the dark Saionji could tell that Touga had turned to face him and that he could see a reflection from the light coming in through the poorly covered windows on Touga's eyes.

"I could sleep if you would stop talking," Saionji whispered harshly back.

"Is it just that?" Touga asked softly.

Saionji kept his silence and merely stared vacantly at the black wall on the other side of the room. He heard the zipper of Touga's sleeping bag open and before he could protest, Touga himself had curled up next to Saionji.

"What are you doing?" Saionji tried to sound angry, but the surprise overtook that easily enough.

Touga didn't respond verbally, instead he wrapped his arms around Saionji as best he could and began to nibble on his roommate's ear. Saionji twitched a little in surprise, but quickly found himself returning the embrace and closing his eyes to savor the sensation.

This, of course, had been exactly what Touga had been expecting, and soon his hand were seeking out the edges of Saionji's clothing where he began to pull it off of Saionji's lightly muscled body. However, he didn't get past removing the pesky T-shirt before Saionji protested.

"No!" Saionji growled and sat up, pushing Touga off of him. He turned and glared at Touga even if he couldn't see him in the dark. "You won't trick me so easily. I know what you're up to. If you manage to succeed in seducing me you think I'll be under your control."

In the next instant Saionji had Touga's shoulders pinned to the floor and he was scowling down at his counterpart. Touga smiled up at him pleasantly, and reached a hand up to caress the side of Saionji's face.

"You know I couldn't do that to you, dear Saionji." Touga said softly as he brushed some of his friend's green hair behind his ear.

Saionji only curled his lips in response.

"Why do you hate me so much?" Touga leaned up slightly. "Have I really hurt you that badly in the past?"

A single, small tear escaped the corner of Saionji's eye and he quickly moved to brush it away, but Touga stopped him then leaned up and kissed the tear away.

"I promise I won't hurt you anymore, Saionji," Touga whispered into the curl of Saionji's ear, and then moved to capture his mouth in a kiss, which Saionji allowed as well.



***



Saionji sighed out loud and opened his eyes; quickly looking out all the car windows to make sure neighborhood gang members hadn't unsuspectingly surrounded him. When he was satisfied by the emptiness of the parking lot, he started up the maroon colored Jaguar and made a right turn out of the car wash. Of course, this being Detroit, he had to make another turn a little ways down the road so that he could turn around and go the direction he really wanted to go.

"It's getting better all the ti-i-ime…" Saionji sang quietly along with the radio.

He raced past the grocery store and kept singing absently as he carefully watched out for his turn. The turn came up quickly and Saionji swerved recklessly to make it in time; for a reason he wasn't entirely sure of himself, he was eager to get home.

Soon he found himself driving around in the small parking lot out next to the building his apartment was in.

"Damn people…why do I always have to park way down here…" Saionji grumbled to himself as he pulled into a spot a dozen yards or so from the door to the apartment building.

Upon entering the apartment itself, which Touga referred to as their Inner Sanctum, Saionji found Touga sitting at the card table chatting on the phone.

"Get off the phone, Touga," Saionji ordered as he shut and locked the door behind him. "Off. Now!"

Touga gave Saionji a look of defiance, "I'm talking to my sister."

"Tell her to shut her trap, we need to talk." Saionji swiped the phone from Touga and put it to his ear. "Good bye Nanami. He'll talk to you later." He clicked the phone off before the girl could get too much of a protest in.

"That was very rude, Saionji," Touga stood up and crossed his arms, but then smiled. "But what else should I expect from you? She was driving me mad anyway."

Unexpectedly Saionji pulled Touga close to him and kissed him deeply and passionately. Touga responded immediately returning the kiss with his own eager longing.

Saionji made a move to remove Touga's shirt, however, the red-haired playboy stopped him and pulled out of the kiss.

"No, no, Saionji. I never sleep with the same person twice." Touga straightened his shirt and stepped back.

Saionji stared at Touga incredulously, "What do you mean? You slept with half the students in the school…male and female."

Touga nodded, "Well, you may be exaggerating a bit there…but I never slept with the same person twice. I'm looking for something more than just lust in a relationship."

"Since when do you have all these ethics?" Saionji still couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"Even playboys have an ethic's code, Saionji…" He smiled slyly. "It may be a bit different from that of your average person, but I still have one."

This was almost too much for Saionji to take and he threw his arms up in the air, "What do you want then?"

"A meaningful relationship," Touga replied simply.

Saionji let his arms fall to his sides, "You are one twisted bastard."

Touga shook his head with a smile, "Tsk, tsk, Saionji. You know my parents were married when I was born."

"That's not what I meant, and you know it," Saionji glared dangerously at his current object of irritation.

"Saionji," Touga's expression softened then he stepped forward and placed his hands on Saionji's shoulders. "Why can't you just say it?"

"You're being a pain…" Saionji carefully avoided meeting Touga's eyes. "What do you want me to say?"

"I don't want you to say anything you don't mean." Touga took his newest lover's face in his hand. "Tell me what you want to say."

Moments passed that felt like centuries as the two young men stared at each other in the middle of what might have passed as a living room if it had contained a couch or some other kind of furniture.

"I hate you…" Saionji whispered and brushed the back of his hand across Touga's face looking at him in a way that completely contradicted what he had just said.

Touga smiled and leaned forward so that his mouth was next to Saionji's ear, "Why don't we go back in the bedroom and you can show me just how much you despise me, hm?"

Saionji wrapped his arms around Touga and began to kiss and nibble up his lover's neck. Touga pulled away playfully and began tugging Saionji towards the bedroom. Once they were inside the room, Saionji promptly picked up the cage with the canary and placed it outside the door with the towel over top of it.