What Could Have Been
Authors Note: For the purposes of this story and others, the graphic novel Son of the Demon is in continuity. Well mine at least. :-)
"Again, I can't thank you enough for coming on such short notice. My husband just got tickets a short while ago."
"It's no problem, really. I always love taking care of little Scotty."
"We'll be back by midnight. If you have any problems..."
"Your cell phone numbers on the fridge. I know."
"I guess I'm a little bit of a worrywart."
"I understand completely."
"Honey, if we don't leave now we'll miss the start of the first act!"
"All right, I'm coming!"
"Don't worry, and have a good time!" she waves as their BMW pulls from the drive.
"Um," Scotty says, tugging on her coat.
"Yes, honey," she replies, glancing down at the sleepy eyed little boy.
"Would you tell me a story?" he asks sheepishly.
"Of course, it would be my pleasure," she says, a smile spreading on her face. "What do you want to hear tonight? We never have finished the Hobbit."
"I know, and that was good and all, but....."
"But?"
"I want to hear another story about Batman."
"You want another one? Sheesh! I've told you Batman stories the last six times I've babysat for you." she teases.
He frowns at her. "I'm not a baby!"
"No, of course not. You've grown up to be quite a big man. Just like your Daddy," she whispers softly. Ruffling her fingers through his hair. "Just like your Daddy."
"Well?"
"Brush your teeth first, then I'll tell you a story. Go on, shoo."
She wanders off into his remarkably clean bedroom. His Batman preference immediately evident. From the bedspread to the wallpaper, the Bat was everywhere. And who was responsible for that? She muses to herself.
"I'm ready!" he beams at her, all decked out in his Batman and Robin pajamas.
He lasts about thirty minutes into the story, all tuckered out from his days adventures. Adventures that she wishes..... that she wishes...... Well it's pointless to wonder what might have been. She had made her decision years ago, and now she had to live with the consequences. Perhaps what she was doing was wrong, but she had done far worse in her life. The main thing was making sure that her father wouldn't find out what she was up to. He could never know.
"Good night, sweet prince," she kisses him on the forehead. As she turns off the lights, she spots a shadow in the window. A familiar form cutting a hole into heart. "No, it cannot be. I was so careful. So careful."
He motions her out of the room, so as to not disturb the sleeping boy.
"Talia, how could you?"
"Beloved, I never meant..."
"For me to find out?"
"I never wanted to hurt you," she whispers softly.
"I would have done anything for you. Given up everything."
"I know. Even your life."
"Just tell me why?" he pleads.
"You nearly died protecting me."
"So? That's reason for you to tell me that our baby died. To push me away!"
"I didn't want. I couldn't endure...." struggling to find the words to justify what she had done to him. The pain reflected in his eyes, made it all the more difficult. He had always been oh so good at hiding his emotions. Keeping them tightly under wraps. This was tearing him up inside, and that pained her in a way that mere words could not express. "You never could have continued to work with my father. One of you would have killed the other. I could not bear it then, and I cannot bear it now, beloved."
"I could have dealt with him in another way."
"What? Prison? He would have never allowed himself to be imprisoned for long."
"We could have found a way, to have made it work."
"Including your retirement as Batman?"
"If necessary."
"Please beloved, it would have never worked. You could never give that life up. It has been what you have lived for ever since your parents murder."
"Damn it, Talia! You know how much I wanted our baby. How much I was looking forward to our being a family! Dick could have taken over for me!"
"While we stayed home and played house? I don't think so. Dick never liked me. Not in the least. He always saw me as a demoness out to destroy you. Why he even went so far as to recruit Catwoman, to try and prevent me from sullying you! I imagine he must have been relieved in a small way when you told him that I had miscarried."
"Dick never would have.... I never told him, or Alfred, or anyone," he says quietly, trying desperately to hold his emotions in check.
"You kept it all to yourself," she whispers in horror. "No. Oh, no. I never meant for you to go through this all alone! I thought you would confide at least in Alfred, if no one else."
"He could tell that something was bothering me. He knows me so well. Sometimes its almost scary the way he anticipates my every need. But I couldn't, I just couldn't....... It hurt too much."
"He could have helped you. He at least understood our relationship."
"Perhaps. What are you doing here, Talia? You gave our son up for adoption years ago. Why are you here? Having second thoughts?"
"Yes, and no. I just wanted to see him, once. To make sure that he was all right. That they were taking good care of him. One thing led to another, and I became his regular baby-sitter. I never meant to interfere, but I couldn't help myself. I would...I would tell him stories about you almost every night that I watched over him. Our "adventures" together. You're his favorite "hero", he said he wanted to grow up to be just like you. Ironic, huh?"
"Yes," he says wistfully. "You shouldn't be here, Talia. He has a family who love him. Keeping up this charade.... It will only cause you more pain down the road."
"I know."
"Promise me, that this will be the last night," he requests in a somber tone.
"I....I promise, beloved."
He cups her cheek in his hand and gazes somberly into her eyes. "You should have trusted me, Talia. Now it's too late." He walks back into the bedroom, his heart bursting in anguish. For all the lost moments and opportunities. Not sure who he blames most for the unenviable position that they are in: her, her father, or himself. Glancing down at the life he had helped to create, he wasn't sure. All he knew, was that he could not let his own selfish desires interfere with what was best for the boy. "Good-bye, my... son."
"Beloved..."
"Yes?"
"I'm sorry."
"I know, Talia. I know," he sighs deeply. With that he departs, the same way he entered. Lost in the shadows of the night.
Disclaimer: Talia and Batman are owned by DC Comics. This fan fiction is meant as pure, harmless fun. As always, no profit is being made from this.