AN: I don't own Inglorious Basterds, I'm sure you're shocked. This is my first story for Inglorious Basterds so I'm sorry if it's not up to your standards. Enjoy.

If you can't get rid of the skeleton in your closet, you'd best teach it to dance

-George Bernard Shaw

Chapter One:

The French countryside was calm as a dark figure moved cautiously through the heavy foliage. From a distance there was no defining characteristic that classified this figure as anything special, not even a real distinction between male or female, just a bag slung over their right shoulder and a rifle lying diagonally across their back. It would be a safe bet that they had a camp set up nearby; no one was stupid enough to wander this far into the woods with only a small bag and a gun

"You see that?" Smithson Utivich asked his companion, the rather imposing Bear Jew himself, Donny Donowitz.

"The moving thing, yeah" he took aim with his gun but Smithson put his arm up and lowered it

"They could have friends" was all the slighter man said as an explanation. Donny grunted in agreement before leaving the gun and maneuvering his way down so that he could ambush the trespasser.

The stranger moved with deliberate steps, seeming to quickly check for any trap that may have been hiding just inches ahead in their path, so Donny quickly assumed that they were military or former military. Beyond that, the gun was standard issue, nothing distinguishing it from a thousand others, and they had on loose grey pants, a black jacket with tarnished silver buttons, a grey hat with a slight brim that cast enough of a shadow that he couldn't make out a face, and simple black shoes.

Finally the stranger made it to a point where Donny could quickly hit them over the head and knock them out. The dark figure was completely surprised, completely off guard, and quickly on the ground. Once the loud thump of a body hitting the ground reached Utivich's ears he made his way down to where Donny was standing over the now unconscious body. It still wasn't clear which side the stranger was on so they quickly decided to bring them back for Aldo to decide what to do with them.

As they picked up the unconscious form the hat fell from their head to reveal a mass of dark brown curls, clipped up by a handful of small clips. Both of their eyes widened slightly in shock. It was clear now that this was a woman, her delicate features and long hair unmistakable in the dull light that shone through the trees.

"Well, can't say I was expecting that" Donny said as he took the girl's gun and bag before grabbing her hands and motioning to Utivich to grab her ankles. Once he had them they heaved her off the ground, she was actually surprisingly light, and started walking towards camp

"What exactly are we going to tell the Lieutenant?" Utivich asked when they were about two minutes from the camp

"Tell him that we found 'er walking around and thought it best not to shoot her" Donny said with a slight shrug and continued towards the camp

"What the hell is that?" Lt. Aldo Raine asked loudly from the other end of the camp as they came into view

"We found her, while we were keeping watch sir" Utivich said in a very formal tone as he and Donny set the girl haphazardly down on the ground

"I was going ta shoot her but we thought she could have friends around so thought it better to just knock her out" Aldo nodded and made his way over to them. Once he was there he cocked his head to the side as he inspected her.

"Well tie 'er up, don't want her escapin before we question her do we?" they both nodded and went to fetch some rope. While they were getting rope he grabbed her things off the ground, inspecting the gun first. At first glance there was nothing special about it but carved into the butt of the gun was a small letter 'A' that was barely noticeable but still present. In her bag was a box of bullets, an apple, a silver bracelet, and a mason jar filled with used bullets. Overall, it seemed like random junk the average person wouldn't go walking through the woods with, well except the apple.

"Sir, is there a reason there's a girl right there?" Hirschberg asked as he came to stand next to the lieutenant.

"Not sure yet, they're might be" he shrugged as Donny and Utivich returned with rope and made work of tying her hands behind her back and her feet together.

"What do we do now?" Utivich asked

"We wait" Aldo said and took a few steps back before plopping himself down on one of the logs that had been serving as a seat for quite some time now. A few moments later Donny, Utivich, and Hirschberg joined him and within five minutes the rest of the Basterds had joined them.

All but Wicki and Stiglitz, who were gathering information at a pub in a town a few miles from the camp. They were expected back within the hour, perhaps even before the girl woke up

It took another fifteen minutes before she showed any real sign of life. She didn't make any noise and if they hadn't been watching her so intently they wouldn't have noticed that she had, in fact, woken up. Her eyes fluttered open and quickly scanned over her surroundings, lingering for only milliseconds on each of their faces before dropping to the ground before her and giving a tug at the rope binding her hands together. She muttered something, low enough that none of them caught it.

"Morning girly" Aldo said and got up from his seat

"You are mistaken" she paused, a smirk gracing her features "is not morning" from her words they could tell that she was German, no doubt about it.

"Looks like we got us a little German on our hands, boys" Aldo said looking back at his men. "Now listen here, we don't like Germans, nope, not one bit, so you had better give me one hell of a reason not to kill you" she took her time in processing his words and opened her lips to speak but closed them before uttering a single word and looked up at Aldo

"You think I am like them, ja?" her words were calculated and they could hear the hatred and contempt she forced into the word 'them'

"Why shouldn't I?" she laughed and shook her head, closing her eyes in frustration

"I may have been born in Germany, raised in Germany, taught German, schooled in Germany, but I am no German. No more can I be German" she looked down, took a deep breath and returned her gaze to Aldo, who was giving her a questioning look

"You can't be German, without being German" Donny said as he came to stand next to his lieutenant

"But I am" suddenly the sound of gravel under tires reached all of their ears to alert them that Wicki and Stiglitz were back. The closer they got the louder the distraction became and questions for the German girl were forgotten, her last statement almost completely disregarded.

They left the girl near the dead fire pit she had been near for the duration of her stay, leaving only Omar to make sure she didn't get away. He had been ordered to shoot her if she tried to escape.

"Any news?" Aldo asked when he caught sight of the two as they got out of the car

"Nothing interesting, what's going on over there?" Wicki asked as he noticed Omar standing guard over the bound up girl

"Donowitz and Utivich found her wondering in the woods, she only came to a few minutes ago actually" Hirschberg said from his position behind Donny

"She know anything?" Wicki asked and glanced back over at the girl. Stiglitz seemed to be rather disinterested, or very interested, it was hard to tell with him.

"Not sure yet, all we know is that she's German"

"What's a German girl doing in the French countryside?" Wicki asked, more to himself than to his fellow Basterds

"How 'bout we go find out" Aldo said and led the procession back over to where the girl was tied up. Once she was in plain view for the two new comers one of them gasped slightly in shock while the other looked her over for anything important.

"Impossible" Hugo Stiglitz whispered, almost inaudibly, as he took in the girl. She was taller, probably 5'8 and very slim, even in the oversized clothing, with wild dark curls pinned to her head, deep green eyes, full lips, and rosy cheeks. She had to be 22 now, eight years older than the last time he saw her, well, last time they spoke.

"Sie verräter! Ich hasse euch!"(You traitor! I hate you!) her words cut through the silence and made him want to slap himself for forgetting what it felt like to be on the receiving end of one of her fits "Ich hatte gehofft sie gestorben" (I had hoped you died) these words were softer but seemed to hold the same hatred and resentment as her previous statement.

"So I take it you two know each other" Aldo said, trying to comprehend what the girl had said. All he had understood was that this girl really disliked his man, though he didn't get that from the actual words said. Her tone was unmistakable, hate was hate, no matter the language.

"No," she said harshly and glared at Stiglitz "not anymore" she finished, a murderous look still in her eyes