This is set after The Wedding of River Song and sometime in season 2 of TORCHWOOD. I don't own either.

The Doctor had only just dropped River back in her cell. But she had no plans of staying long. She quickly set the coordinates on her Vortex Manipulator and zapped into Cardiff. Taking in her surroundings, she pulled out a small device and tapped into a nearby CCTV and used it to send out a subwave signal saying 'Hello Sweetie'. Content with her message, she walked down to the public entrance of TORCHWOOD. She opened the door to see a handsome young man at the front desk. River smirked as she stood in front of him. He looked up and smiled.

"Ianto Jones," he said standing up. "How may I help you?" he asked with an adorable Welsh accent. River smiled in a flirting way, taking out the psychic paper she sneakily took from her husband without his noticing, and handed it to Mr. Jones.

"Amy Pond. UNIT. I'm here to see Captain Jack Harkness," she lied easily. Ianto eyed the piece of paper, noticing it was blank and handed it back to her.

"Very well. Follow me," the very handsome Ianto led 'Amy' aka River down into the Hub. "Jack!" Ianto called as the others looked up at the two of them. "Someone here to see you." An incredibly handsome man in a long WWII coat walked out. "Amy Pond from UNIT. At least that's what she says. Handed me psychic paper." River rolled her eyes.

"Amy Pond? Taking your mother's name now, River Song?" Jack said in very noticeable American vowels.

"Well, you'd know all about taking somebody else's name, wouldn't you, Captain Jack." River smiled. "Anyway, that's not why I'm here."

"You had a reason?" Jack asked, feigning disappointment. "I thought you just dropped by to see an old friend." he smiled.

"Old friend? You stole my Warship. I want it back."

"Oh, River Song. There is only one of two things I'd give you. A kiss, or a bullet from this gun." Jack said unholstering his pistol and aiming it at her while she simultaneously took out her gun and aimed it at Jack. "Last time, I didn't care what the legends said about you. But that was before I actually met The Doctor. So tell me. Which part of the legends are true? Did you marry him? Or kill him?" he asked seriously. River smiled in a flirtatious manner.

"Both. I married him. And then I killed him." she said coolly. Jack cocked his gun.

"Then I'll give you the bullet." Just then, a familiar whooshing sound echoed through the Hub as the TARDIS materialized in front of them all. A tall, lanky man in a tweed jacket, bowtie, and fez stepped out of the blue box.

"The only thing you'll be giving her Jack, is whatever the hell she wants. 'Cause she just won't take no for an answer. Love that about her." The Doctor smiled at the Captain then turned to his wife. "Hi honey, I'm home." River lowered her gun and smiled.

"And what sort of time do you call this?"

"Or 'Hello Sweetie' as you used to say." The Doctor said walking over to her while Jack lowered his gun and watched the two of them.

"Hello Sweetie." River smiled and kissed her husband. When they broke apart, River raised her gun again and shot Jack between the eyes. Everyone else in the Hub raised their guns at River while The Doctor grumbled.

"Guns. I hate guns. So many bloody guns in this place." The Doctor said as Jack woke with a huge gasp of air and glared at River. "Must you kill my friends, River?" he complained to his wife.

"He had it coming. Plus it's entertaining because I can just kill him again." she said shooting Jack again and the TORCHWOOD team prepared to fire.

"Enough with the guns!" The Doctor grumbled and quickly snatched River's gun. For the second time, Jack awoke.

"Hell of a woman you got there, Doc. Didn't know you liked them so hot and dangerous." Jack said getting up and walking over to them.

"What? She nearly destroyed time just to marry me. How could I resist?" The Doctor smiled.

It sort of started from River's point of view then just wandered. Anyway I hope you guys liked it. As usual, comments and suggestions are more than welcome. :)