Nakoma/Shang One-Shot! Enjoy!

Love Lost

"I don't know."

"What do you mean you 'don't know'?" Nakoma reeled. "Everything you do and say…what is all for? I sense you want to be with me, but what is it? Am I not good enough?"

Nakoma felt hurt and confused. Her heart ached with the power of his words, and she didn't know how to mend them. All this time he had shown her his slight inclinations; the subtle touch of his hand, or his penetrating stare. She didn't know what to make of him just then, and resolved to remain silent. It was easier that way. It was easier to keep her emotions contained if she said nothing.

He gazed at her face, taking in the distress. More than anything he wanted to hold her and let her know that the world was just. That more than anything, he never wanted to leave her. Though, he knew his responsibilities-he new what was expected of him and couldn't abandon it. As the leader of the world's greatest army, he was obligated to perform his duties, and couldn't bear placing that burden on her. She deserved better than that. He knew that if a bond was made, he could hardly be near her. And if something happened to him, he couldn't endure the thought of her agony. His feelings were not worth her pain.

"Nakoma…" Shang started quietly. "Don't ever…please…don't ever say that. Don't ever say you are not good enough for me. Your face, thinking of you, being near you…it devours my soul, like…a raging fire."

He felt awkward, though relieved, saying this to her, and silently passed his hands over his face.

She stood there stunned for a moment, not sure what to say. His face was pained with longing and it was evident that what he wanted, couldn't be obtained. Gently, she took his hand in her own and sighed. "You want to be with me, and more than anything I want the same." She looked down and attempted to control the tears that desperately were trying to break free; but it was futile. As they slid mutely down her face, her voice shook.

"I know what it is like to have others expect much from you. And I know that loyalty is something I value. So I need to understand, as much as I don't want to."

Shang felt something tearing inside of him and squeezed her hand in response. It was in that moment, that he realized his own tears had escaped and he wordlessly wiped them away with his free hand. They stood there for a moment, merely inches from each other, letting the tears land on their entwined clasp. Nakoma spoke, then, in a whisper.

"Please…know that, though we can never be together, it won't stop me. It won't stop me from dreaming of you, thinking of you, seeing your face in every sycamore, longing for you, and hoping for you. I can never stop hoping. So long as I live, I pray that the spirits will, someday, bring us together."

Shang kissed her cheek then, as Nakoma met his eyes somewhat startled. The place burned where his lips had been, and soon he was planting them ever closer to the one place she knew would flame in desire. As he pressed his lips to her own, she felt a mixture of emotions, but predominantly a strong yearning. She knew she had to end it then- that if she didn't pull away, it would just make it worse. They broke softly, foreheads touching one another, breaths matching rhythm. Shang opened his eyes then and understood the expression on her face. Without a sound he, once more, gave her a final kiss on the cheek, and walked in the opposite direction. Nakoma watched his retreating form, before slowly turning to do the same.