Realization
It was that time of fall when it was acceptable to wear shorts and a tee shirt outside, but winter was
peaking over the horizon and slowly the days were getting darker. Beastboy sighed and smiled. He absolutely loved this time of year. The leaves were just starting to change and the nights were growing
longer. He cracked his neck and walked out of the Tower. He looked up at it and shouted, "I won't be gone
long, so don't go anywhere!" He sniggered at his own joke, but not waiting for a reply he quickly changed
into a hawk.
The sensation had never been a pleasant one. Actually it felt like he was being ripped in half.
That's what it felt like to change. Of course he had gotten used to it, but the first few times he had tried it,
he almost never wanted to do it again.
Soaring above the ocean, the wind tore at his face. He closed his eyes and let his wings carry him
for awhile. He inhaled deeply, well as deeply as a hawk could anyways and then about ten feet before
landing changed back into himself and landed with a flourish. An old woman stared at him, mouth open as
if she had never seen a green boy before. She hobbled off and was gone before Beastboy could say "I'm
Beastboy from the Teen Titans!" He shrugged it off and sprinted down the street. He browsed over the
names of stores quickly, but he knew what he was looking for. He ran down two back alleyways, nearly got
flattened by a car on main street and then he found it.
He had always thought that the name was a little obvious, and from the looks he got from people
leaving, he almost wanted not to go in, but he perused. He strutted strait into Toys-r-us. He smiled so
widely, that it looked as if is face might have broken. God, how good it was to be in this place again. The toys, the faint smell of diaper, oh and of course all the bright colors. He skipped through the isles like a little kid in a candy-er toy shop. He wandered around the store awhile before he found the action-figure isle. He ran his eyes up and down the shelves.
He found Optimus Prime, Doc Ock, Hulk Hogan, Lo Pan, Superman, every single power ranger
and even "Monty python and the Holy Grail's" Black knight. He sighed and walked out of the isle, and
headed towards the nearest store employee. A very fat woman with a large mole on her neck, and hair the
color of cat-puke turned around when he poked her shoulder.
She flinched as she turned , obviously very surprised by the green changeling towering
above her. "yes?" she finally managed to spit out. "Hello, um I was wondering where you keep the Teen
Titans action figures?" She instantly snapped back to the bored expression she had before, now aware that
Beastboy wasn't going to mug her, rape her, or ask her what her thoughts on teens these days were. "Yes,
their over here", she said leading him to one isle behind where he had been before. Pink assaulted his eyes.
They were obviously in the girls section.
"Why in the hell are they here?" The question burst out before he could stop it. "To many toys in
the other isles they had to be moved." She answered unemotionally. Her voiced reminded him so much of
Raven just then that he could picture her, in the White and orange shirts and black pants, directing people
around. He almost burst out laughing. He looked over at where the lady had been standing, then looked
behind him just in time to see her jiggle off, her stumpy legs carrying her away .
He looked down at the sad segment of space they had reserved for their action figures. Most of the
Robin, Starfire and Cyborg figures had been picked out, and the overwhelming inhabitants were Himself
and Raven. His smile faltered. 'Yes', he thought, 'isn't that just dandy. The Goth and the green one.'
However he regained his smile when he realized. 'Hey, that's something me and Rae have in common.'
Ever since the first moment that they met, Beastboy had had a crush on Raven, the purple haired
dark-Earth destroyer. She was so different that anyone he had ever met. She was a loner, not to stuck up to
accept the fact that he was indeed green. She did get on his nerves a lot, but he was sure it was vise-versa
for her. There had always kinda been a mutual understanding between her and him. She did insult him,
but there were moments when he absolutely knew that they belonged together. That had changed when
Terra had moved in, he convinced himself. If she hadn't had… He inhaled sharply, tears immediately
coming to his eyes. He wiped them away hurriedly, just in time to see a mother telling her daughter that they
would come back to get her a Barbie when the isle was less crowded. Beastboy looked around. He was the
only one in the isle. That hurt him. He suddenly had the strangest feeling of inadequacy. He shivered and
pulled his pants away from his waist and moved them around until they were in a more comfortable
position. He sighed and tried to shake off that unfamiliar feeling.
He thought more about Raven, and how that maybe even when Terra was there, did he still feel the
same way about her? Was he intentionally trying to make Raven jealous with Terra. No he concluded. He had truly loved Terra. He sifted thought the pile of figures again, having found Cyborg, Raven, and himself
(of course) he was now looking for Starfire and Robin. The perfect couple. That's what all the newspapers were calling them. It kind of made him jealous how their love could be so perfect and, well, easy. After that
little escapade in Tokyo, everything had been hunky-dory for them. They held hands, they went on dates,
and they never fought. Beastboy was sifting thought the toys at a ferocious speed now. Why he questioned
angrily? Why couldn't he have that what was so DIFFERENT ABOUT HIM?" Some toys overflowed from
the self they were resting on and hit the white tiles with a dull thud.
He picked them up and scratched his neck hastily. Terra could have been his everything. He had a
feeling thought, at the last time that he had seen her, a normal girl at a normal school, that had been the
last time that he would ever see her again. It was over between them. It hurt him so bad that he almost burst.
That's what disturbed him about Starfire and Robin. They could never be in a situation like that. But he c
couldn't get mad at Robin and Starfire today. No, because today he was looking for a gift for Robin. His
birthday is in a week, he slowly reminded
himself. He found a Starfire, and now was just searching for Robin. Besides Robin and Starfire were like
the Prom King and Queen. They went perfect together. Beastboy could never have that. Terra was his
chance, and she was gone. Thoughts of Second chances with Raven didn't even occur to him. He got that feeling again, of utter inadequacy. It made him feel like the ugliest person in the world. The only one that would never find love. He tried to shake it off, but this
time it didn't leave. He finally found a Robin, probably the last one in the pile, and then took off speeding
strait towards check out, not stopping to admire any other possible purchases. He threw the toys out on to
the register and pulled his wallet out of his back pocket.
The girl at the checkout popped her gum lazily. She looked up at his face and then took in a gasp
of deep breath. Beastboy looked at her, trying to make his bangs so they covered his face, so that mabey she
wouldn't think he was so different and ugly. The girl had light
blonde hair, and rosy cheeks, she looked about average height and weight, but the one thing that caught
Beastboy's attention was her purple eyes, adorned with heavy black eye shadow, they were an exact copy of
Raven's.
"Your Beastboy from the Teen Titans!" she smiled widely. "OMG this is like to good!" Beastboy
smiled back at her and could feel the ends of his ears turning red. "Raven is so cool, she's like my idol!"
Said the girl. "and Cyborg the robot!" And Starfire is so pretty!" Beastboy gleamed at the girl, his self
confidence returning, at least somebody knew who he was. "Yeah, that's us." he said, not sure what else there was to be said. "oh my god, and Robin!", she nearly shrieked, now leaning across the register, nearly
spitting in his face. 'He is SOOOO HOT!" She gasped and then tried to regain her composure. "And you. You are, well," she seamed at a loss for words "Green!"
Then a strange thing happened to Beastboy, he got very angry, so angry in fact that he could barley
choke out the words. "Thank you." He picked up the toys reached over the counter, grabbed a bag and
shoved the figures in. He walked away from the lane, heading towards the front door. The girl stood
petrified, obviously trying to make sense of what had just happened.
"Hey! You didn't pay for those!" Beastboy gave her a look that said "drop dead" then headed out
of the store. The alarms went off, reminding him that he hadn't in fact paid for his present. He ran down the
street, getting angrier and angrier with every step he took.