Falling Down
When Alice is 24, she comes home from China. During her five years abroad she has learned how to craft a proper contract, barter with merchants in Mandarin Chinese, and recognize pure jade from a forgery. She counts her venture as a successful one and feels confident her father would approve. The boat rocks gently as it docks, and as she steps lightly off of the gangplank memories of complex dances float through her mind.
Her mother waits for her at the very back of the crowd and greets her with a sniff, commenting unhappily on her "foreign ways" and "strange, unpleasant apparel." "Hamish," she asserts, "would never have allowed you to head off on such an adventure."
"Precisely why I wouldn't marry Hamish," Alice says, and leaves her mother to stare in shock at her impertinence.
Six months after Alice returns, she meets a very Unusual Man. He is tall, but not too tall, and handsome without matching conventional tastes. The only problem, she notes, is that he doesn't drink tea. It is now that she begins to see flashes of white out of the corner of her eye.
Exactly one year and 3 days after Alice returns from China, she stops associating with the Unusual Man. She had never paid much attention to him and doesn't miss him when he's gone. He never understood her odd curiosity or her insistence upon learning the answer to "why is a raven like a writing desk?", even if she can't quite remember why she should. It is now that she begins to reclaim her memories.
Two months after she regains her conventional freedom, which she never really felt she lost, she reunites with the White Rabbit. She watches him skip around the corners of her estate, and, out of habit, she follows. He stops behind a tree and faces her, his familiar face no longer lined with worry. They begin to talk and everything comes flooding back. She exhales slowly and smiles as he compliments her on her sustained "muchness".
He asks her if she wants to return to Wonderland (Underland, he explains, is no longer.) She hesitates, an image of a goodbye flooding her mind. She hesitates...and the pressing orders of business come back to her. "No," she says finally, "not yet." Not yet.
A week after she meets the White Rabbit, she decides to confide in her business partner. After a particularly successful meeting, she begins to tell him of her journeys into Wonderland. He remains silent for a moment, then he smiles. "If you weren't your father's daughter, I wouldn't believe you," he says. "Going back someday, eh? I'll look after things until you come home." They both know she won't return.
Four months after she meets the White Rabbit, she decides to return to Wonderland. The White Rabbit, almost instinctively, seems to know exactly what she wants. He appears soon after she runs outside, and he escorts her to a rabbit hole.
Falling down is like coming home. She smiles as a writing desk floats past her and brushes a hand down the keys of a twirling piano. She manages to land on her feet and remembers to grab the key on the table before drinking the familiar potion.
She laughs as she shrinks and rushes over to open the door, fumbling with the key in excitement. The difference is stunning. It's finally, finally the Wonderland of her dreams. If she listens carefully enough, she can hear flowers singing.
The Cheshire Cat appears, purring and smiling luxuriously. He leads her down a beautiful spring lane and points her down the Correct Path when he feels like leaving. She doesn't really need directions, but she appreciates the gesture.
Exactly seven years, one week, and four days after she leaves the Hatter, she sees him. He is fiddling with a teacup and looking morosely at a shattered tea set, and she thinks it's wonderful to see him so unchanged. She steps into the clearing and says softly, "I've thought of a few particularly interesting words that begin with M." She wonders if he'll remember. He looks up, eyes twisting lavender with delight.
"Alice?" he whispers, and she grins.