Authors note: Yes, I know that I said I would never write another fanfiction ever again. But guess what, I LIED. This was started out as a character Biography for my friends Kingdom Hearts RPG, the link can be found in my profile…which now that I think about it need's some serious updating. I mean, I don't think I've actually written anything fan based in almost a year and a half. ANYWAS, like I said this was written as a biography, and as such may be a bit stilted at times. But I figured if this thing was going to be as long as most one shots on the internet, I might as well post it anyways.

Pairings: Largely zemyx. A bit one sided, nothing too graphic. Rated for language.

Disclaimer: I do not own kingdom hearts, it's characters, or it's affiliates. I can only dream.

xX faded memory Xx

Before he was ever had even heard of the Organization, and far before he was even a Nobody, Demyx was happy.

He KNEW happiness.

He had a heart. He was Myde.

Myde was a singer/songwriter for a small band with big dreams. He was just out of high school (and by that I mean he dropped out at 17) and had big dreams of proving his parents wrong and becoming a huge star. His band mates and he tried to get noticed on their own, but were not successful. One day, as they were just losing hope they got a letter asking them to play for Ansem the Wise. Demyx readily agreed; he had heard that Ansem often helped out small time artists and gave them the recommendations they needed. One day, they packed their instruments and headed towards the architectural monstrosity that was the castle.

Walking into that huge castle was a bit scary for Myde. Clinging to his sitar, he took timid steps through the door, giving a nervous smile to the stony faced guards.

Actually playing for Ansem the Wise wasn't nearly as scary as he thought it would be, in fact, the old king seemed to enjoy his band's music immensely. He praised their work, saying that it was 'good that art still existed in its true form, even in this technical and scientific world'. Happy and filled with excitement, Myde strolled out of the office, and right into the most amazing, beautiful, and yet positively infuriating individual he had ever met.

Ienzo...

From the moment Myde first saw him, he was shocked by his depth and striking good looks. His eyes...he felt as if he could get lost in them. That is, until the lilac haired devil in disguise spoke.
"Get out my way, idiot."

Myde, being the submissive fool that he was, blushed and quickly stepped out of the way. Ienzo walked brusquely past him, paying no more attention to him than if he were another painting on the wall. But that didn't matter to Myde at the moment; he was too shocked over this encounter. As his band mates led him away, complaining loudly about the nerve of some ass holes, Myde vowed that he would win the affection, if not attention, of that man. "Is it love at first sight?" Myde wondered later when he was sitting quietly on his small and cozy bed. He didn't know, but it sure felt like it. Screw clichés, he could call it true love if he wanted to. After all, he wrote and sung about love, so why not? In the days that followed, Myde was a frequent visitor to the castle, always hoping for another glimpse of the short man.

However, over the next weeks Myde didn't have much time to think about Ienzo, as he later learned was his name. He was too busy preparing for his band's first concert. Ansem had stayed true to his word, and there was going to be a record company there to see if Myde's band was worth giving a record deal to. The day of the concert Myde sang with his entire being; heart and soul. But his heart skipped a beat and his voice nearly died in his throat, when, as he scanned the crowd for the guys from the record company, he saw him. Ienzo. He was sitting between Ansem and Elaeus. But his best friend saved him, making it appear as if the sudden stop in the singing were all part of the show. The crowd loved it. But Myde recovered soon enough, and by the end of the show they had the record deal in the bag.

If Myde had never met Ienzo; if he had never tried to fin him; if Myde had focused solely on his music; he probably would never have become Demyx.

Like in most stories when a major change happens, it was raining. Two weeks later, Myde was going back to the castle alone to thank Ansem the Wise for all his help. The large size of the castle didn't even bother him anymore as he jogged toward shelter from the rain. But as soon as he walked inside to discover the guards gone, he felt...no, knew, that something was terribly wrong. His foot steps echoed along the walls, and he did not notice the strange yellow-eyed creature that stalked him from the darkness. He left the door wide open.1

Myde never knew what hit him, one second he was wandering the halls of the castle, and the next he was floating in darkness. Everywhere; all around him, he felt the oppressive darkness. He seemed to be slowly splitting in two, but his body didn't want that. It wanted to remain one, and one half of who he was fading away. But Myde didn't want that. Desperately, he clung onto his memories, who he was, and struggled to keep himself together. But the strain was too great, and in the end it was only his will that saved him.

He then knew nothingness.

When he awoke, he knew something was missing. He felt...gross. Unholy, and un-whole. He was in a strange world, one where small, insect like creatures made of darkness gathered around his limp body like insects to a kill. But they were stopped by a very familiar person.

Xemnas he introduced himself as, though Myde was sure that the dark-skinned man had gone by another name at one time. But it hurt too much to try and remember, so he gave up. And, in turn, introduced himself as "Myde". But the man laughed a cruel, emotionless laugh that sounded hollow and heartless.
"Not anymore," he said, "Now you will be known as Demyx, number IX"

And so, Myde became Demyx.

Demyx was rushed around; introduced to so many familiar faces...and others not so familiar. One face in particular struck him as very familiar...not to mention beautifully perfect. His name was Zexion, but that somehow didn't fit him. Myde-I mean Demyx tried to think of a better name for him, but every time he did all he got was a splitting headache.

He was also introduced to a man named Axel, who apparently wielded the fire element. Axel and Demyx hit it off right away and soon became friends...well, closer than acquaintances anyway.

After the introductions, Demyx was taken aside for briefing with the 'leaders pet' as he heard the others call him behind his back. The 'pets' name was Saix, and Demyx got the suspicion that the 'superior' as he was supposed to call Xemnas, wanted nothing more than to kick Demyx out to fend for himself, and put Saix across the table and have his way with him right then and there.

But, remarkably, the Superior and the Pet controlled their respective sex drives and rapidly told Demyx the basics of Nobodies. At the part when they explained that Demyx had no heart, he placed his hand over the empty whole in his chest and fought back tears. That was why his memories were escaping him like water through a sift! The Superior also explained that everyone in the Organization has a special ability. And when he asked Demyx to concentrate and find his ability, a perfect water clone of himself appeared. Xemnas did not seem overly pleased. Xemnas shoed Demyx out of his office, told him to pick any room that was not occupied, and that is he had any more questions he should ask numbers II-VIII.

Demyx then found himself alone in a castle even larger than the one of a fleeting memory.

The next few...years, was it? Time had no more meaning to him. He didn't age, so why should he keep track of the time?

He became fast friends with Xigbar, Axel, Marluxia, and Luxord, and learned the hard way to stay away from Larexene, Xaldin, Saix, and Vexen. He also occasionally has chats with Lexaeus, but found that they didn't have much in common. The member that intrigued him the most, however, was Zexion.

Demyx found himself following around Zexion, much to the senior member's distaste. He tried talking with him, but always felt stupid afterward. Zexion had that effect on people, more so than Vexen even. But Demyx would not give up, spurred on by some promise he vaguely recalled making to himself. Or perhaps it was only a dream.

Because they had no hearts, the members of Organization XIII could not 'make love'. But it was not uncommon for them to seek comfort in closeness, and in ecstasy feel closer to their hearts.

The first time Demyx was with Zexion, he found himself being fucked into the mattress. Demyx could only submit; he would never ask for control. And in those moments, when he was riding out the last waves of an orgasm, Demyx liked to pretend that his heart was still there, and not just an empty hole in his chest. He pretended that Zexion wasn't just fucking him; he pretended that they were lovers. In truth, He began to act it out outside of his mind. He refused to sleep with anyone else. He told himself that he would belong to Zexion. Only Zexion.

Demyx could not believe it when it happened. He wouldn't believe it. It wasn't possible.

He was gone.

Demyx hated Axel for it. He truly hated him...or he would if he had a heart. But why, if he didn't have the heart to hate Axel for killing him, why did the place where his heart was hurt so much now that Zexion was gone? Gone, that was another way in which Demyx was in denial. Zexion was never dead, only gone. He told himself that he would be back. But he knew in his heart that it wasn't true.

That revolution was a time of pain for Demyx. All the mistrust...and death...it was more than he could handle. Marluxia...Larexene...Vexen...Lexaeus...Zexion...all gone. Needless to say it was much quieter. Thinking back on it, he supposed that it was because of his experiences that he developed his so called bi-polar disorder.

Xemnas was a lot more careful after the whole ordeal, and sent the members on many long and hard missions. Demyx supposed it was that so they would be too tired to revolt. Whatever the reason, it worked to make the remaining members quiet and orderly.

The only comfort Demyx found after Zexion's death was in his music, and in Axel. But with the arrival of Roxas, Axel was slowly slipping away. Demyx liked the kid and all, but now Axel, his first friend that he made in the Organization, was distracted and spent all his time with Roxas.

Eventually it was just Demyx and his music.

If this was where people go after death, Demyx could not blame them for not wanting to die. The underworld was dark, murky, and full of heartless. But he couldn't help holding onto the small hope that maybe...just maybe...he would get to find Zexion. And that was enough to improve his mood and make him act like his old self again. The mission was simple; scout out the underworld and bring back anything of use. Of course, he just had to run into Roxas 2. The bastard was really starting to ruin his life. He looked a little different, but the eyes were the same. Well, similar enough to not make a difference to Demyx. Of course, when he challenged Roxas to a battle, he lost. Miserably. Thus, he failed both his missions.

Xemnas was not happy. Neither was Demyx. It's hard to be happy when you are being yelled at for your so-called stupidity and incompetence.
Hitting Demyx made Xemnas feel better about the foiled missions, but not good enough to save Demyx from punishment.

Demyx was given the ultimate punishment for his failures; he was sent on an impossible mission. One he could not survive.

Axel came to see him again...for the first time in a long while. He begged Demyx not to go, asked him to leave the organization like he did. But Demyx was too far gone to listen. He withheld this perverse hope that Xemnas wasn't really trying to get him killed, that he wasn't really as useless as everyone said. Eventually, Axel gave up and left in a fury, saying how he didn't care if Demyx wanted to get himself killed fighting for an Organization that didn't want him.

Tears seemed to come too easily for Demyx these days.

The fight with Roxas wasn't at all like Demyx had thought it would be. He was actually holding his own against the Keyblade master, and landing a few good blows. In his mind he kept saying "I will win, I will win..." like a mantra, to keep him going. But in the end it was all for naught.

He was fading; he could feel himself falling apart. It hurt like a bitch. And the worst part was Roxas was staring at his pain...emotionless 3. No, not emotionless; almost sadistically. As if he enjoyed the fact that Demyx was now fading. 'Who's the one without a heart now bastard!' he wanted to shout, but no words escaped his lips other than a wail of despair. But as he finally faded, he was struck with a new hope, a shining glow of light that made the passing through the darkness that much easier.

'I'm coming, Ienzo.'

4 He shouldn't be able to think, none the less breathe. Why was the ground solid? What happened to the darkness? All these questions were swirling through Demyx's confused head in a vortex of thought and emotion.

He sat up and looked around him, trying to wrap his mind around what he saw. The familiar walls of hollow bastion rose around him. Demyx blinked rapidly, both scared and excited.

'I'm...home.'

And if he was alive, then maybe, just maybe, the others were too.

END

1 What I mean to say here is that it was Demyx's fault that the heartless got out of the castle.

2 Um, in case you can't tell, Demyx thinks Sora is Roxas.

3 Even if I didn't like Demyx, I still would have felt bad for killing him! I hated Sora at that point, not to mention Donald and Goofy. I was glad when Goofy "died".

4 This part was added in to fit in with my friends RPG. All the Organization characters have come back, and there is a new enemy. The site is still under construction, but if you are interested in a character you can make an account and apply. The site is in my profile, or will be within the next day.

Thank you for taking the time to read this, and I do have a favor to ask of anyone. Please read and review, and if you can visit my deviant art. My name on there is Run-AwayArtist and I know the stuff on there isn't all that great, but it's all that I have put up. Most of it's a year or two old, but I really want people to look at my art.