All that Dean ever wanted was to be happy, but now without Castiel in his life, he has finally come to the conclusion that he has no one, that Bobby is gone too, Dean doesn't know what he'll do without either of them, he still has Sam but they seem to be drifting apart, Dean will do whatever it takes to keep Sam alive, even if it means that would die himself, once again Dean was willing to make the ultimate sacrifice for Sam, then again Dean would die in a heart beat for Sam, he has before, nothing would never change that either, he just wished he had told Bobby that he loved him, Dean was never one to open up and become all emotional, I guess always excepted them to know how he felt, yet there he sat on the motel bed, just wishing he had Bobby and Castiel back, the feeling he shared for each where completely different, he loved Bobby as a father, he loved Sam as a brother, but then there was Castiel the angel who saved him from hell, who rebelled for him, who died for him more then once, Dean knew how he felt for the angel, he had never come to actually terms with his feelings after all he was Dean Winchester, a womanizer never in Sam or Bobby's eyes was he homosexual, Dean was far from ashamed to admit he these type of feelings for Castiel, but he did deep down inside he knew he loved him, sure they were best friends, but it was more then that, As Castiel said they shared a profound bond, the angel's face plagued Dean's nightmares he all covered in black slime and walking into water, some dreams Castiel's hand would be reaching for Dean's waiting for him to grab him, but he would always wake up before he could grab it, if only Dean had been able to help him, he blamed himself he should have helped the angel instead much like always Dean turned his back on him and disowned him as a friend, now Castiel was gone thinking that Dean hated him, Dean laid back on the old creaky motel bed, staring at the ceiling thinking to himself, he would give anything to see Castiel, Dean wiped his eye as one single streamed down his face, Dean turned around and quickly fell asleep. Dean woke to a noise he slowly he reached under his pillow, for his gun he grabbed it, and jumped up from the bed, to see nothing Dean looked around, he swore he had heard something, Dean sighed he walked over to the fridge when he noticed something laying in the side pocket of his duffel bag, he curiously dug it out it was a letter Dean opened it and began to read it:
Dean, I do not understand what I'm doing but I have read often that "humans" will address the ones they care about, so I'm addressing you, please understand I did it all for you, because of you, I know you must hate me, and you have every reason to, I must tell you something...
I love you and I always have and I always will, I know you are probably thinking I am an idiot, but I am truly sorry for what I have done to you.
Castiel.
Dean sat there stunned, he took a deep breathe, he wondered why he didn't see the letter before, he noticed something else in the envelope he dug inside and pulled out a single black feather, Dean looked at it, and closed his eyes he knew Castiel would always be with him cause he had a piece of him to keep with him forever.
The End.