I could feel my heart race as I approached the man that Voight said was the guy that did the bombings. Act naturally, Erin. You got this. This is the type of stuff you live for. I took a deep breath, walking next to Olinsky. We parted ways when we gotten closer to the man. He stood to his left while I approached him from his right.
"Hey. You leaving already?" I asked, politely to the man. He looked away from the nurse, suspicion growing on his face.
"Yeah, I just got released a few minutes ago." He said, slowly.
"Oh, well. I'd need a word-"
"I was just leaving." He interrupted. "I have to go, I just got released." He persisted.
"I know, sir. It's going to take a few minutes, I promise. It's protocol." I told him nicely.
In the matter of seconds, everything changed on me. The situation unfolded and I was a hostage to this man. He held the knife below my chin. I felt the cold metal hitting my neck. Remain calm, Erin. Don't let fear overcome your body. I said to myself. I took a deep breath, watching how my colleagues were going to fix this situation.
All guns out, pointing to him. I could feel the fear rising in the pit of my stomach as the cold metal was pressing harder into my neck.
"Let her go." Voight demanded.
The man put on a devious smirk. "You want her. Well too bad." The knife pressed harder, I bit my lip waiting for the impact, but it never came. A metal hit the back of the man's body and his grip on me slowly released. Reactions kicked in. I elbowed him in the gut to push him away and then swung my gun to his face. The man collapsed to the ground, every body huddling over him to make sure he wasn't going anywhere.
Voight grabbed my arm, pushing me away from the man. He turned around and looked me in the eyes. "You alright?"
"Just do your job." I smirked. He patted my shoulder, grabbing the man in the process.
I rubbed the side of my neck, making sure there wasn't any blood. I looked at the palm of my hand, no damage. I looked at the firefighters that were standing in the middle of the hallway. I walked towards them. A small smile appeared on my face.
"Hey," they both looked at me. "I wanted to say, thank you. If it wasn't for you, I think I'd be in a lot more damage." I admitted.
A boyish smile appeared on the young firefighter. He nodded in appreciation. "I'm just doing my job. No need to thank me."
I nodded and started to back away. "Thought I'd like to remind you that I am thankful."
I turned around to walk towards the office, but something didn't feel right. My breaths started becoming rapid. My heart was beating faster than usual. I looked around the hallway and found a bathroom. I ran inside of there. Fear was slowly creeping inside of me. I put both hands on each side of the sink. Slow breaths, Erin. Calm down. Push the fear back to it's box. Don't let it overcome your body. I closed my eyes, trying to picture times when I felt my happiest.
A picture of Jay popped into my head. His light blue eyes with his boyish grin. His muscular body and his 'I don't give a fuck' attitude. Everything about him made me start to slowly calm down, but it seemed harder for me to get back to my regular state. I was thinking too much and it wasn't helping with the cause.
It was strange. At first, everything was fine. Next thing, I knew my fear was overcoming my body and that scared me. I can't be scared especially not at this job. I kept trying to slow down my breathing, but it wasn't working. Everything I did was making it worse. I felt my hands start to shake and chest start to give me discomfort.
The door slowly opened and a head peeked in.
"Hey, Erin. I just wanted to check- Erin, are you okay?" Jay asked.
I was going to answer him, but fear held me back from talking. I shook my head, rapidly, but that caused my panic attack to become worse. I felt my breathing shorten even more, almost as if I couldn't breathe anymore. I doubled over, holding my chest.
"Erin!" Jay quickly ran to my side. He grabbed my face into his hands. "Look at me, Erin. Look at me." He forced my head to look at him, my eyes trying to find their way to his. "Relax. I'm here." He calmly said.
Jay stared at me the whole time, his eyes never leaving mine. His hands still holding my face and in the moment, things started to shift. I felt my heart slowly decrease in speed, my chest slowly relaxing, and the shaking diminished. I felt my body loosen from his grip, but Jay never left his hands off my face. He kept them steady. We held each other's gaze a minute longer until he released his hold.
"Thank you." I whispered. My voice being a bit hoarse from the panic attack.
Jay nodded, a small smile appearing on his face. "Anything for you, Erin. I have your back, remember?" Jay slowly helped me up. He looked at me and hugged me tightly. "If you ever need anything I'm here for you." He whispered into my ear.
A small smile appeared on my face as our bodies interlocked perfectly. Maybe, I wasn't going to have a perfect ending anytime soon, but at this very moment, I had hope. Hope in the people that are fighting for their lives in the hospital, hope that Chicago will move past this, hope that we'll get the man who put lives in danger, and hope that one day, I will conquer fear.