A/N:I don't know if anyone'll catch on, but this is my way of making fun of the fact that in every fan fiction - heck, in the books, even - they're always drinking pumpkin juice and talking about pumpkin juice, as if it's all there is. Though it's endearing in Harry Potter, I felt compelled…
Disclaimer:I own nothing. I lay down no claim… Harry Potter is not mine…
Pumpkin Juice
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Harry was in a good mood. In fact, he was in a great mood.
He hadn't had a nightmare in weeks, hadn't experienced any sudden flashes of Voldemort's emotions, and there hadn't been any attacks for nearly a month, now. That's not to say he wasn't still feeling the heavy pressure of the war, and the knowledge that everything could collapse at any time wasn't taking it's toll – because he wasfeeling it, and it was taking it's toll – but, right now, in Hogwarts, with his friends and only homework (and Potions class) to worry about, Harry was in fine form.
So in this mind set, happy as Larry and brighter than usual at this time of morning, Harry sat beside his best mate for breakfast, and took a nice, deep breath.
This, he thought, is what life's about.
The smell of fresh eggs and bacon wafted over him languidly, making his mouth water. The toast was still steaming slightly – and the jam looked to be the best batch the House Elves of Hogwarts had made yet. The students were seated along the four long tables, chatting and waking up quickly in the bright morning – not a cloud in the ceiling – creating a healthy buzz in the back of Harry's mind.
He spooned some eggs onto his plate, and picked up his fork with a satisfied look on his face.
"You're looking particularly bright this morning." Hermione noted wryly from behind the book she had propped against the giant pitcher of pumpkin juice.
"I feel particularly bright this morning, Hermione. Thank you." Harry replied, spearing some egg and eating it with a relish he hadn't taken in the sheer pleasure of simply eating and enjoying what he was eating before.
Hermione gave him a weird look, but it was soon replaced by a kind smile. It was nice to see Harry in such a positive mood after all the time he'd spent brooding and mourning. She just hoped it would last.
Ron looked up from shoveling food in his mouth – perhaps he was aiming to beat his previous record? – and opened his mouth to speak.
"'Ar-" Ron chocked on his food before he could spit even one word out.
Hermione gave him a depreciating glare and filled his goblet with pumpkin juice, pushing it towards him irritably (if not fondly). He gave her a thankful nod, but she wasn't paying attention, she had moved to fill Harry's empty goblet.
Harry looked at it, and said off-handedly, not even registering that he was saying the words at all, "Oh, no pumpkin juice for me, thanks. Can't stand the stuff."
The jug fell from Hermione's suddenly slack hands, and the Great Hall – packed with all the Professors and most of the students – fell deadly silent.
Harry cursed as pumpkin juice spilled across the table and onto his freshly laundered robes, and failed to notice straight away.
Everyone stared at the cursing boy, immobile and still in shock.
Harry looked up from where he was soaking up the juice with a napkin, and gave everyone a confused expression.
"What?"
Hermione was the first to snap out of it, and leaned in close to Harry.
"Harry! Not like pumpkin juice!? Whatever do you mean?" she whispered furiously, scandalised.
Harry's eyes widened and he bit his lip. "Drat." He took a deep breath, trying to think of a way out of the mess he had made. "I – I didn't mean it! I do like pumpkin juice! I wasn't – I wasn't thinking when I said that! It was a joke!"
Liar, Harry accused himself. And a bad one, at that.
Hermione narrowed her fierce glare, pinning him. "Do not lie to me, Harry James Potter! You were telling the truth! You don't like pumpkin juice!"
Harry glared right back and exploded.
"Fine! I don't like pumpkin juice, there – I said it!" he cried, standing up violently, making everyone in the Hall start, frightened out of their avid stupor. "I hate the vile stuff, and I loathed every time you poured it down my throat! I've never liked it, and I don't understand why I have to drink it so much! There's other juices, you know!
"Is it too much to ask for a cup of good old orange juice!? How about some apple juice – heck, pineapple juice, even! I'm sick and tired of your pumpkin juice! You're always giving it to me, always mentioning it, talking about it! What's so great about pumpkin juice!? It's all I ever hear about it – well, I've had enough! It tastes awful, and I'll never drink it again!"
Harry panted for breath, staring down everyone in the Hall. He felt better, actually.
"But – Mate, it's pumpkin juice! Everyone has it – it's – it's what we drink. How – how can you not like it?" Ron couldn't contemplate this turn of events… And how could he? It was pumpkin juice. Everyone liked pumpkin juice! It – it was unheard of, for someone to dislike it!
"Potter," a voice snarled from behind Harry, and he turned around quickly. Snape had advanced on them, and so furious was he, that Harry didn't even notice the man until he made his presence known.
"Is this true?" he said softly, but firmly enough that Harry knew instinctively that Snape was deadly serious. "You don't like pumpkin juice?"
Harry blinked, and nodded hesitantly. What would Snape do – heck, what would everyone do, now that they knew his worst secret.
"I see," Snape hissed.
A Ravenclaw had fainted at the news, and more than one Hufflepuff was sobbing hysterically now. Harry looked to the floor in shame, even as he felt the Slytherin's glares bearing down on him from the other side of the Hall.
He sighed. There goes his good mood…
END.