A/N: Random story, using all the song titles in sentences (said by the characters) in an actual conversation. I came up with this a while ago, but I didn't actually get around to posting it until now. Written script style because I was lazy. Song titles most likely said by the characters who sang them.
I HAVE NO BETA!! Anyone interested? D
Disclaimer: Me no owny…(sob)
ANGEL: Man, with all this drama and romance and random weird shit, what with a lot of you guys, you know…breaking up and stuff, I don't even feel like we're living normal lives anymore. I feel like, instead of measuring our lives in minutes, we're measuring our lives in love. It's more like—like, Seasons of Love instead, you know?
MARK: Oh yeah, Angel! As a matter of fact, we—I mean, they have been so focused on our—I mean, their stupid little romantic dramas that we've forgotten to think about how we're going to pay the Rent!
BENNY: Now Mark, if you had just listened to me, you could be living for free in a beautiful condo. Not to mention, you'd be living right above the place where you could be making your movie—also, free of charge! Don't worry, though! You never know when I might give you another chance. You'll See, boys…you'll see.
ROGER: Oh, boy! You mean if Mark had just gone and stopped Maureen's protest, and we had never gone to the Life Café, and I had never met the girl of my dreams, I could be sitting in some cheap condo, writing my One Song, Glory? Oh, wait, I already did! (sticks out tongue at Benny)
MIMI: Roger, you already met the girl of your dreams. Remember, when she came up to your loft, because she—I mean, I needed you to Light My Candle?
ANGEL: Whatever! We are gonna have so much fun, today! Because, as we all know, no day matters like the present, and this day is for you guys! Today 4 You! And you—and you—and you!!
MAUREEN: Today is for me?? Oh, boy!! We're gonna have so much fun, going out, dancing, meeting some new people…
JOANNE: That's fine, just don't suddenly ditch us to go and do the Tango: Maureen with some random guy you've never met before!
MARK: (snigger)
COLLINS: Well, we've got a few hours, but later Angel and I have to go to our Life Support meeting.
MIMI: Aww, man! After you guys leave, what am I supposed to do for fun? Ooh, Roger, do you want to go Out tonight?
MARK: It's a Sunday night, and lots of us have to go to work tomorrow. Where are you gonna go? What places are gonna be open? Shouldn't you just go Another Day?
ROGER: It doesn't really matter, does it? I mean, we're diseased, dude. We're trying to live life to the fullest. No Day But Today, you know?
MAUREEN: Will there be enough room for me to tag along?
JOANNE: I won't have to come chaperone you, Will I?
ROGER: Lighten up, Joanne! You should come, too. There's plenty of room for everyone in Santa Fe!
ANGEL: Ew, are you guys sure you want to go there? I heard that it's so big and scary and different…I wouldn't feel very safe there.
COLLINS: Don't worry my angel. If we ever do go there, I'll Cover You and protect you from the big scary people in that big scary place!
BENNY: Santa Fe is so far away, though. How are you guys ever going to manage to get over there? Especially, if you're (ahem) broke.
MAUREEN: Simple. We've just got to jump Over the Moon. Take a leap of faith and believe in ourselves, you know?
MARK: Sure, Maureen. "If we truly believe"--we can get to Santa Fe…with no money and no means of transportation.
MAUREEN: Roger's got a car.
ROGER: I sold it to get my guitar back, remember? And to get back to my Mimi.
MIMI: I think we should turn up in Santa Fe looking like the true bohemians we are! Freak the people out, a little. (dreamy sigh )The first bohemians in Santa Fe…
JOANNE: I doubt that, Mimi. But, how 'bout the subway?
MARK: Not bohemian enough, I think. But we can't afford anything else, can we? Unless…Angel, you got anymore money?
ANGEL: Sorry, honey.
COLLINS: Anyone else's dog you could kill, or something?
ANGEL: I'm not doing that, again!
MARK: (looks at Roger)
ROGER: Forget it, man! I'm not selling my precious guitar again!
MARK: Subway it is, then…and don't at me like that, Mimi, it's the closest thing to 'bohemian' we've got! Besides, it's free! And we are a little short on—broke…we're broke.
MIMI: Well, we can't let down the good old tradition of La Vie Boheme, can we?
ROGER: (dreamy sigh) That was the best night of my life!
MARK: What are you talking about, dude?
ROGER: In case I haven't said it today, Mimi…
MIMI: Yeah?
ROGER: I Should Tell You--
MIMI: I Should Tell You--
ROGER: I love you.
MAUREEN/JOANNE/MARK: Awww!!
MIMI/ROGER: Shut up!
JOANNE: Don't yell at me, my freakishly bohemian girlfriend has been a bad influence on me!
MAUREEN: What can I say? Oh, how 'bout this: Viva La Vie Boheme!
MIMI: (laughs) Maureen's not one to break tradition! Especially, La Vie Boheme!
JOANNE: My god, how did you ever get me? You're turning me into a bohemian!
ANGEL: See what the Seasons of Love can do to you, Joanne?
MAUREEN: I thought you liked being bohemian. Besides, I'm a one of a kind! Take Me or Leave Me, baby.
JOANNE: I think I will…take! (sigh) What would I do Without You?
MAUREEN: I know! You need someone to cover you! And that someone's going to be me!
MIMI: Roger, I want someone to cover me…
ROGER: Don't worry, Meems. I'll Cover You.
COLLINS: And Angel, don't forget that I will always be your blanket.
ANGEL: Aww! Thanks, Collins. And I will always be your coat. But, now Marky's the only one without a blanket…
MAUREEN: We can all cover Marky! He will get extra protection!
MIMI: Group hug, everyone!
ROGER: (snigger)
MARK: Shut up…
BENNY: Well, it's too late to get a subway now. So, what should we do?
MIMI: (gasp) Let's go trick-or-treating!
ROGER: (stares)
MIMI: Well, it is Halloween--
(They go trick-or-treating…)
(Mimi gets the crap scared out of her by Roger)
MIMI: You know, it's bad enough that you break the tradition of trick-or-treating by not even getting in costume—
ROGER: I am in a costume! I'm a rock star! Look, I'm wearing my leather jacket, my 'stylishly' ripped jeans, and I've got my guitar!
MIMI: Roger, dressing up in your own clothes doesn't count as a costume!
MAUREEN: Yeah, if you wear something that you'd normally wear every day, you're not in costume!
ROGER: Says you. Your clothes are wacky enough to be a Halloween costume!
MAUREEN: Yeah, maybe, but where's the fun in dressing up normally for Halloween?
MIMI: Anyway, next to ruining the tradition of Halloween costumes, your little 'let's-scare-the-crap-out-of-Mimi' moment just made me spill half my candy!
(They go around picking up Mimi's spilled pieces of candy)
MIMI: Well, I got most of it back, but there were a few pieces that didn't make it! (glares at Roger)
ROGER: Oh, Mimi! I am so sorry! You know I would do anything to help you, but it looks like these pieces are damaged beyond repair! I think that you are just going to have to dump these pieces. Let them go, Mimi. Just let them go.
MIMI: Dump? You mean, like, dumping an old boyfriend? The one you thought you really, truly loved?
ROGER: (gulp)
MARK: (snigger)
JOANNE: Oh, don't worry, Roger! I'm sure it didn't mean anything…
MAUREEN: Yeah, Mimi. Just pretend that each of those candies is the face of the guy you loved as you throw it down that sewer! Like you're saying goodbye to it, because you know that you will never see it again!
MIMI: (tosses candies) Goodbye, Love…
ANGEL: It's okay, Mimi. At least the phrase, 'You are what you eat' does not apply here. Otherwise, you'd be a bunch of sewer-flavored candy. Yech!
COLLINS: Yeah, more like, 'You are What You Own'.
GROUP: ……?!
COLLINS: Well, to put it this way, she is not like the sewer flavored candy. "Yech!" Instead, she is like the sweet, delicious candy she has in her bag, there. Her hair, her eyes her skin—all the color of different kinds of chocolate. She is like a human-size candy bar…kinda like those chocolate Santas.
MARK: I don't know whether to call you a philosopher or a really creepy, whacked-out stalker!
MAUREEN: How 'bout a bit of both?
ROGER: (dazed) Her eyes…
ANGEL: What?
ROGER: Mimi—
MIMI: Huh?
ROGER: I Should Tell You—
MIMI: Well, here we go…again. I know, I know, you love me. God, are you turning into a stalker of some sort, too?
ROGER: No, it's just—Collins was right…Your Eyes…
MIMI: What about them?
ROGER: They're beautiful.
MIMI: (blushes)
GROUP: Aww!
MIMI: Aww, Roger. Do you know what would happen to me Without You?
ROGER: What would happen?
MIMI: I Would Die Without You.
ROGER: Well, then, we'd better get going on having the time of our lives tonight. No Day But Today, right?
GROUP: (cheers)
MAUREEN: Besides, even if something were to happen, we'd be there to take care of each other, right? After all, Love Heals. And our love is something that will never fade, and can never be broken!
-End-
Well, I don't like this that much, but that doesn't mean that you shouldn't review! So please, press that little purple button and make my day! You can come and visit Mark and Roger, who are currently tied up in my closet! They are a little lonely and would enjoy some visitors! ; ;
R&R please!