A Constant Reminder

Hermione cried. Cried for herself. Cried for her lover. Cried for the only thing she had left. The only thing that would be a constant reminder of their love and friendship. And she didn't want it. She feared she would hate it. She feared she would look at it and instantly associate it with pain and grief. She, for the life of her, did not want this constant reminder.

It had been two months since the war ended. They had lost almost half of the Order. Including Ronald Weasley. Her fallen friend. Her fallen hero. Her fallen lover. She closed her eyes as another sob tore through her body. She didn't want this constant reminder.

Hugging the pillow to her chest, she cried. She wanted him back. She wanted him, not this reminder. There was a soft knock on her bedroom door and then a soft creek as the door opened. She felt the presence of another as they closed the door and sat down on the bed beside her. There was a soft clink of glass and she guessed they had set down a cup of tea or sleeping potion, on her nightstand. She felt herself being pulled and picked up, then set down again, this time on their lap. They wrapped their arms around her as she let go of the pillow and instead, replaced it with the front of their shirt.

They ran a hand over her hair as they cradled her in their arms. "What's wrong, kitten?" Hermione shook her head and cried harder against his chest. Gripping her chin lightly, he tilted her head towards him. "What happened?" Hermione's lip trembled and he ran a thumb over them. "You know you can tell me anything, Hermione." he said gently and she instantly felt at ease.

Hermione stared him with watery eyes. She hadn't known it was he who had come to comfort her this time. Usually it was Harry or George. Or even Remus on occasion. But she never would have guessed Sirius Black to comfort her the most. She swallowed the lump in her throat and licked her lips.

"I…I'm…" She broke down crying again and laid her head on his chest. "I can't do this. I don't want it. Not now. He's gone. This can't happen." she sobbed.

Sirius held her tighter before cupping her face with his hands. Once their eyes met, he tried again. "Tell me." She stared at him and he could tell she was thinking. Of what, he didn't know.

Could she tell him? Could she tell him that Ron knew he may not make it through the war, so he left her with the constant reminder of their one night together? Could she trust him? Would he be angry? Would he tell the others? She didn't know, but there was something in his eyes. Something that the others didn't have when they tried to comfort her. Something that eased her fears and she knew, she would come to love this constant reminder. Taking a deep breath, she trusted her heart.

"I'm pregnant."

Sirius lay beside the now sleeping girl, propped up on his elbow and his head in his hand. He ran a hand through her hair, brushing it back over her shoulder. Not being able to stop himself, he gently brushed the back of his fingers across her cheek, the proceeded to run his fingers over her shoulder and down her arm. She's fragile. He reminded himself. He was almost afraid to touch her, afraid she would break, but every time he took his hand away or stopped his feather light caresses, she would shift to move closer. He knew it wasn't in any desire to be with him, but the feeling of human touch that she craved. He could always pretend of course.

Sighing contently, she rolled to lay on her back and he paused his hand as it now rest lightly near hear collarbone. He could feel her heart beating steady beneath her soft, porcelain skin. He closed his eyes, embracing the feeling. Opening his eyes a few moments later, he looked down at her and smiled lightly. She looked so peaceful. So innocent. But he knew the truth. Perhaps more than anyone else at 12 Grimmauld Place. He knew how she felt. How she was tired of fighting. How she hated having to pick up the pieces after finding one of them drunk and crying of the things they've seen in the war. She was tired, he realized, of having to be strong and hold back her emotions, while everyone else had the right to break down as they pleased at any time. So she cried at night in the silence of the house, while the rest of the residence were sound asleep. She didn't know it, but she had every right to fall apart like the others. She didn't know that she didn't have to be strong. She didn't know, neither did for that matter until a month ago, that he had fallen for the small brunette.

Running his hand down to her stomach, he placed it flat against her, his thumb making soothing circles. He wished it were his and not Ron's. Either way, he knew he would take care of them. He would take care of them, the way he would if she were his and the child were theirs. And maybe, she would fall for him as well.

His heart soared with the thought of Hermione finally being his. He should know better than to get his hopes up, but with her laying soundly beside him, he couldn't help but let them soar just a bit. He may not have much in his life now, but he didn't need much. Only Hermione. She was all he needed. And maybe, as time passed, he would be all she needed as well. Her and the constant reminder. Yes, that was all they needed. A constant reminder.

A/N: I had to get this out. Let me know what you guys think.