OK, this is just a warning: SOLID FLUFF AND ANGST AHEAD. Includes character death (though I reckon that that doesn't really count in oneshots).
And I realise that I haven't written anything in a million years, but that's not my fault. Blame 4-week holidays in Europe and exams and major English assignments. Also in my defence: I wrote this on the plane on my way to/from Europe while listening to Taylor Swift, so, really, the total angst, drama and general crappiness isn't my fault at all.
It happens almost in slow motion. I see the staff weapon spark; hear the buzz as the energy flies towards your chest. Watch in horror, paralysed, as the blast hits you. Hear the 'whump' of the fatal blow, your strangled cry as it knocks you to the ground.
And now, everything is in fast-forward. I am running, unaware of the shots whizzing around my head. I reach you, and it's as though nothing else is real. I don't even need to check to know that the wound is fatal, and my heart freezes as the realisation hits me.
I think back to the short time we had together. It seems impossibly wasted. Did I ever even tell you that I loved you?
My mind races, remembering everything, every day we spent in each other's company. All those secretive glances, the way we would brush fingers when we thought no-one was looking – like children, unable to break the rules but willing to bend them. I think of how I felt when you touched me, how the slightest, most innocent look could send shivers down my spine and sparks flying across my body.
It seems as if we are in our own little bubble, unaffected by the battle going on around us. Almost of their own accord, my hands are shaking you, my voice hoarse as I repeat your name over and over again, willing you to hold on.
"Please don't leave me."
Telling you I love you whispering all the things that I've wanted to say to you over these years. I can read in your eyes, how you are saying the same things back to me, without words. I can read your pleading look, and know what you want.
As I press my lips to yours, I can feel your desire as strongly as my own, and my heart shatters for you, knowing how you barely have enough energy to stay alive, let alone respond.
And as I release my hold on you, I can see that I have given you everything you wished for in that moment. As the last spark flees from your eyes, the tears stream down my face. And I whisper, my terrible choice of words for last goodbyes;
"We never should have left it in the room."
I stand up, ignoring the looks of shock on my teammate's faces, the staff blasts tearing apart the ground around me. You were my life, and now I have nothing to live for. Now I am fearless.
Like I said, not my fault. Just review.
Other random note: wicked (the musical) is coming to Sydney!!!! So I have taken the task upon myself to inform everyone that I know (and lots of people that I don't know) that they should go and see it. I DON'T CARE WHERE YOU LIVE, but all of you should go and see it at some point in your lives because it is the BEST MUSICAL EVER EVER EVER. I am listening to the soundtrack as we speak…
So, ta ta for now!
:D MSC