If Hogwarts was in The United States of America:

THey wouldn't say "blimey" "bloody" or "mum". The End. Just Kidding. Here's the end, American style.

Harry and Voldemort moved in slow circles. Everyone watched silently. Hogwarts was crumbling around them, but they pated no heed. This was the final battle between good and evil. This was all that mattered.

"Why try, Harry Potter?" Voldemort hissed. "Do you believe you have something that can defeat me?"

"Yes, I do." Harry replied calmly.

Voldemort smiled. "Is it love? Love did not stop me from killing your filthy mother, you know. And it appears no one loves you enough to take my curse for you. So what will stop you from dying when I strike?"

"Just a few things," said Harry, and still they circled each other, held apart by nothing but their last secret. "First, I never was very good at magic. Second, every muggle knows that silver pierces magic, and I was raised by muggles. Third, since you killed my parents I've been freeloading off my aunt and uncle. My parents left me a fair amount of money. Add eighteen years of interest and I'm filthy rich. Lastly, being raised by muggles in the U. S. A., I'm obsessed with guns."

Shock flit across Voldemort's face for a moment, but it was instantly dispelled. Voldemort began to laugh a humorless insane laugh; it echoed around the silent Hall. "Is that all you have to say before I kill you? Telling me you like guns better than magic?"

"I have one more thing to say." Harry said.

"Let's here it, then" Voldemort hissed. He leaned forward dangerously. "Tell us how loving guns, filthy muggle guns, and renouncing magic will save you." Harry stared into Voldemort's eyes, and the red slits widened as Voldemort realized what Harry had told him.

"Just one thing: SCREW THIS MAGIC SHIT!" Harry screamed as he pulled out a handgun.

"Protego!" roared Voldemort. Harry laughed and Voldemort watched in horror as six silver bullets broke through the shield charm and into his chest.

Voldemort fell backwards and landed with an unceremonious thud. For a brief moment, no one moved.

Some of the Death Eaters stood frozen in shock, but most ran for the entrance hall. There they met a horrifying sight. Professor McGonagall and Professor Trelawny stood on top of the stairs, each holding two Tommy guns. The Death Eaters stopped and stared. Before they could move, all four guns started spitting bullets. Over the roar of the guns McGonagall screamed "It's easier than shooting fish in a barrel!"

In the Great Hall, Kingsley pulled out a machine gun, but before he could start shooting, Neville put a hand on his arm and said, "I got this." Everyone watched in amazement as Neville pulled out a bazooka.

"They're silver shells too." Said Luna. As Neville shouldred the bazooka, everybody but the Death Eaters backed against the walls. Some covered their ears. The Death Eaters fainted on the spot.

Neville turned to Kingsley and said: "I told you I got this." Luna took some silver shells out of her robes. "I guess we won't be needing these" she said sadly.

19 Years Later

Harry had not fired a gun in nineteen years. All was well.

In America, it's not action without guns. I hope you enjoyed. Please review.