Years had gone by with the normal day to day goings-on happening in the Wastelands. It was NCR against Legion, Khans against NCR, Freeside against Vegas, Fiend against...well, the Wastes; it was a happy time as far as 'happy' could be defined. Everyone knew their roles, everyone was fine and dandy doing what they did best. It was all about defending your own and trying to make the Mojave safer.
And then IT happened. No one was sure when or how or even why, but all they knew was that IT had arrived and IT was growing bigger every day. The threat was out of this world - something HAD to be done.
And fast.
A huge Mojave meeting had been called, and every faction had been summoned - at least those who were the most affected by IT - and they gathered at the very place they were all going to war over; the Dam. For now, war was the last thing on their minds. People were shouting over each other, confused, outraged, highly disturbed. Finally President Kimball took over, using a Securitron to project his voice so everyone could hear.
"I understand the anguish and suffering you all are dealing with. I recognise that we can not defeat this on our own and it is effectively ruining all that we each have strived to become." He had brought silence throughout the differing factions. "All I can think of to suggest is to transfer our mindset from going to war for the Dam to going to war against... IT. If we work together, we can banish this very grave dilemma and things can go back to how we have been used to -" Kimball let out a slight cough as he made a small gesture toward Boone, who was standing off toward the side with a few other NCR troops.
The sniper, as impassive as usual, just stared back at the President until Kimball let out a breath and touched the top of his own head. Boone, figuring it out, reached up to his own beret and slowly took it off his head. His eyes narrowed to mere slits as he took in the once bright red beret which was now pink with a little daisy sticking out of the top. There seemed to be Mouse Ears gracing the top as well.
Boone was not amused.
When President Kimball held his hand out for the beret, Boone still had problems handing it over but he did. Kimball held it up so all could see. "THIS is what we're dealing with. Constantly. At any second, our integrity is at stake. We must take a st- uh..." Kimball grew quite uncomfortable and cleared his throat a few times before softly saying, "Caesar? Um..." He just looked down and waited.
All eyes turned to the head of the Legion himself and as quickly, all eyes turned back to President Kimball. No one was comfortable seeing him attached to Vulpes Inculta, with their arms around each other. "Yes, yes." Came Caesar's voice, more tired than anything, "They seem fit lately to pose me and Vulpes together, though I hardly see why it's necessary."
"And I am quite aware of my ... fox tail" Came Vulpes silky soft voice. "I believe it's known by... them... as Desu ...Kawi ...Fuck Crap. Can we just crucify them and be done with it all?" The Frumentarii Leader folded his arms, the only sign of how irate he was.
"I too would like this to cease." Came another voice from the crowds. A man in a long white doctors coat came forward. "I may be gay," Arcade Gannon stated, "but I really do NOT wear things like this," He opened his labcoat to show that he was dressed in heels, womans sexy sleepwear and stockings, but as he showed it off, it suddenly erased off him - and ended up on Boone.
"That's fucking it." Was the Sniper's reply.
xxx
The war for the Hoover Dam turned into the War of the Fangirls with a mere nod from the President and, as one, the factions left the Hoover to gather what they'd need.
There was only one issue, however.
No one knew exactly HOW to deal with IT. These fangirls weren't anything that they could touch, see or even bargain with. Still, everyone knew something had to happen, else the entire Mojave and all within, would be lambasted to mere scraps of what they were.
"I just want my beret back." Boone stated, looking at the pink colored, paisley designed eared monstrosity on his head. He'd taken off the ghastly sexy sleepwear a while ago, donning his normal outfit once again. Of course Manny wouldn't give him a replacement beret. He thought it was too funny as a whole; wanted Boone to find SOME humor in it all.
xxx
It took a few weeks but word soon spread that somehow, the Brotherhood had come out of their hiding with the technology to bring the fangirls TO the Mojave. Everyone was told to safeguard their most prized possessions just in case.
And then they waited.
It wasn't 2 hours after the barriers between the worlds came down that a thunderous roar was heard in the distance, combined with a keening wail which grew louder and louder and louder. Mojavians looked at each other, wondering what it could possibly be - until, just like a game of telephone, the word came out.
"The Fangirls approach! The fangirls approach!"
"Well, release the Deathclaws." Boone grumped, lying on his bed in the 38, having been already sought out and taken over by 3 giggling girls. One was painting his nails, one was making his hair grow out long, then curly, then bright blue. Another one was changing his outfits like he was a fashion model. Finally he stood up, fangirls dangling off of him like a bangle bracelet, and he went to the kitchen. Opening a frigerator, he took out a beer and drank it. He then had about 28 more.
xxx
Over in the Legion, every single Legionary had tails and were being followed by hoards of fangirls going on about how cute they were with their widdle ears and tails and skirts and so on. Caesar was on his throne, head in his hands, and finally he roared, "WOULD YOU ACT YOU'RE FROM THE LEGION AND CRUCIFY THEM ALL READY?"
The camp came to a dead silence, everyone looking over at the man who normally never raised his voice. Finally a fangirl came trotting over to him with a huge grin, "But you LOVE us! We know deep down you all are tender and loving. You just need the right girls to show you guys that you DO have feelings and you CAN love that right woman. Right girls?"
Caesar just stared, his eye twitching.
xxx
There were some ghoul fangirls. God help us, there were some ghoul fangirls and really, the ghouls could give a rats ass about the effect the girls had on the rest of the Mojave; THEY, the ghouls, were getting attention. Hell, some fangirls gave them SKIN. Full skin. With hair, and NO radiation.
Nothing wrong in ghoulville at all.
So we move on to another faction that was dually affected: the Fiends.
All the fiends ended up off drugs because THOSE JUST DON'T DO in the fangirl world. Oh no. Things must be perfect and drugs, they just aren't perfect. Soon all the fiends were sober, helpful, and were toting along some awesome goth clothing with the charisma to match.
xxx
Speaking of charisma - part 1.
Benny was having a ball with the influx of chicks roaming about his casino. Hell, they were better looking than the Mojave chicks and they made him out to be a hero, so he was NOT going to argue. Hell, some fangirls came in with something they called a mod and transformed the Mojave girls to some sexy looking things.
Yes, Benny was mighty happy and had no opposition to the fangirl influx - except when they'd take his prized jacket and do odd, unspeakable things to it. Like put it on a brahmin. Or make it into lamps. Or ... tablecloths.
xxx
Arcade had given up a while ago. If they wanted him to look like a pretty lady, fine. Fine. Just hurry up and get GONE. He figured if he'd humor them, they'd grow tired and leave on their own. That was the analytical side of the doctor, truly. But when he stopped to think about it, he DID get more action with the fangirls various male Couriers who WERE pretty damned hot. That party hat had to go though. And the heels and stockings. Other than that, things really weren't THAT bad over all.
xxx
Speaking of Charisma - part 2.
Boone had no idea one could stand on top of the dinosaur. Or even have it carry him all about. But apparently the fangirls dictated it SO, there ya go. He still wasn't amused at the bright pink half shirt he was currently dressed in, and the sequin pants were more Kings style, truth be told. By now the sniper was just convinced it was all an awful, horrible dream and he'd wake up crucified. That would be a much better, manly thing to be stuck in.
Yes. Manly. That was it. This had to end NOW.
xxx
Back at the Dam.
Everyone gathered, fangirls clinging over everyone there. President Kimball had been killed, brought back, killed, brought back, and so on and so on for more times than he cared to count because the fangirls seemed to love it for some fucked up reasonings that escaped even his logical mind.
Back on his trusty Securitron, Kimball's eyes roamed over everyone; the Legion looked like laughingstocks with their stupid tails and ears, Boone was about ready to break - and if HE broke, it'd be world war 6 easily and would do far more damage than WW5 had 200 years past. The NCR as a whole were bugeyed, shaking; clearly disturbed beyond repose. Arcade Gannon was literally drunk on sex. The man had had enough to last 18 lifetimes. At least someone came out on top.
"Okay, we gave you a week here, ladies, but you have to leave. Now. We have bigger things to deal with than ... this. So if you will, please exit the way you came. And next time, don't put so much heart into your work. It effects US. US. We need to remain how we are normally. We're to be at war with ourselves. Not you." He paused and felt his head, taking off a party hat. "Really."
One by one the girls filed out, some sobbing, some giddy still. Once they were gone, everyone breathed a sigh of relief - and then someone called, "Hey... why aren't I back to normal?"
Kimball blinked once and then facepalmed.
He forgot to tell the fangirls to destroy their art. Any time anyone would look at it, it would effect the person they drew about.
It was going to be a long time before the game was forgotten, people moved on and things went truly back to normal.
"We did what we could." He sighed. "I suppose we make the best with what we have to deal with. A good Dam war will help lift our spirits a little. We did what we could."
Glancing over at Boone, he noted the snipers beret was back to normal at least. The scowl on his face was less pronounced, too. Kimball came over and nodded. "Glad to see it all worked out for you in the end, Boone."
The sniper just gazed at him without saying a word, turned and walked off. As he got on the dino and rode off, one could see that his trusty sniper rifle had been turned into a pew pew gun.
Kimball shook his head. Things would be better soon, back to normal at some point.
For now, he had a war to plan out with the NCR.