Author: B'Elanna Paris
Summary: The Telling
Disclaimer: Alias and its characters belongs to ABC etc
A/N: 1/1. What led Sydney to be in the alley. This can be a prequel to 'If You Come Back' but it can be a standalone.
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The clock blinked 2.47 am. I stand staring out the window, rain battering against it. I had the dream again tonight. I feel his name still on my lips, Michael.
The dream, I never tell anyone in fear they may think I am going insane. I have been having it on and off since I left hospital, nearly to two years ago. The dream tonight, we were at a hockey rink, but the dreams always ends the same I would black out and then I would wake up, in this world.
When I'm with him, even though he's not real, I feel happy, safe, complete.
"Rachel?" I hear calling from the bed. He calls me Sydney. "Come back to bed."
"I'm going to get a drink." He's already fallen back asleep.
I've been with Chris for nearly two years now, he was there when I left the hospital. But I never felt a connection to him, I feel a connection to Michael, but he's not real.
I sit in the kitchen of our apartment, questioning everything. I have been questioning many things lately, especially may love for Chris. We don't feel right together. I don't feel right.
I think back to my dream, it always makes me feel warm and fuzzy. I feel important, that I do something that matters to people. It feels exciting, thrilling, dangerous.
The only danger, I have been in my life was nearly two years ago when I was mugged and stabbed, I can't remember much as I blacked out. I've been doing that for a long time, large parts of my life are missing, just blank.
It all started when I was six years old, my parents died. I remember the feeling of loss, sadness and sympathy but everything else is a blur.
A family friend brought me up, Arvin Sloane, he tells me of my parents and my life that was in Los Angeles. That's where I dream of Michael.
The rain outside stops. I haven't been out of the apartment in a couple of days, as my black outs have been increasing, I have had seven in the past 3 weeks. My dreams have been increasing as well, becoming more vivid, sometimes when I wake up I can feel his hands all over me, his breath on my neck.
I decide to go for a walk. I quietly change in the room, where Chris is asleep. I leave the apartment. I walk the streets of Hong Kong near my apartment, trying to clear my mind.
I hear shouting in the alley I coming up to. I glance around the corner to see some young men trying to mug someone. I suddenly have this urge to help, like I can make a difference.
I shout at the men. I distract them for the woman to run, they look at me. They come towards me, I don't try to run. They grab me, when they realise I have nothing of worth, they throw me to the ground and run off.
I hold my hand to my head, I feel dizzy, it's happening again. I black out, my last thought, that I want to dream this time.
THE END.