CKH: Here's another one. Perhaps after I get a couple more stories out, I'll be able to finish the others.
Kazumi: Hopefully. But not likely.
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, and sadly for the narutards of the world, I never will.
"Naruto"- Kyuubi talking
"Naruto"- Kyuubi thinking
"Naruto"- Talking
"Naruto"- Thinking
It hurt. It hurt so much. He tried to ignore it. He tried not to let it get to him. To act like he did when he was younger. When he was blissfully unaware of how much it should and could hurt.
It seemed that it did hurt more to have something and then lose it, than it did to never know of it in the first place.
"Hum, I guess Sasuke does have a good excuse for his bastardness." Naruto, with half-lidded, empty eyes, curled up into a ball on his bed and laughed bitterly.
"Such a stupid idiot you are Naruto. You can't be an emo like the teme. Your friends won't like you if you are. You're supposed to be happy, stupid, and naïve. If they laugh at you, they know you're there. They can't ignore you."
He tried to pull himself together. Tried to smile his million-watt smile. But he couldn't pull it up.
"Smile, smile, smile, smile, smile, smile…" he kept the mantra going, growing steadily more and more angry at himself as his face didn't move.
"You don't matter! You're feelings don't matter! All that matters is keeping THEM happy! So suck it up and SMILE!"
With an enraged shout he smashed his fist into the wall and broke through. He could feel his rage pulling up the fox's chakra, and smiled maniacally.
"Hehehehehe! That's right Naru-chan, Monsters don't matter! Hehehehe! Smile biiiiiig and pretty and never let anyone know what you think! No one, no one, no one, deserves to know what they should but don't see! Hehehehe! Baa-chan, Ero-sennin, Kakashi-sensei, Sakura-chan, Sasuke-teme, Iruka-sensei, and the rest of them! Heh, maybe, just maybe, I should kill them. Make them bleed. Make them understand my pain! Then I won't have to smile anymore. Maybe then…"
"ENOUGH!"the Kyuubi roared, "CONTROL YOURSELF NOW KIT. I WILL NOT HAVE MY VESSLE FALLING APART. KILL ANYONE YOU WANT, BUT I REFUSE TO HAVE YOU LOSE YOURSELF."
Naruto calmed himself, and felt the Kyuubi's chakra recede, and along with it, his insanity.
Thank-you Kyuubi. I am afraid that I will end up a lunatic without your interference.
"I would not let one of my own lose their selves to the darkness of their own mind. But I fear that I soon will not be able to help you. Our kind cannot survive without a mate or companion for as long as you have."
Yes, Naruto was a half-demon kitsune. Because of the break of the seal at the bridge at Wave, the Kyuubi's chakra and a bit of his life force had been merging with his own. It was during his trip with ero-sennin that the merging was completed, and not even ero-sennin knew about it.
He had also became more companionable with Kyuubi thanks to this. His new kitsune blood allowed the Kyuubi to take him on as a kit of sorts. They still had many issues though.
What do you mean? I have you as a companion don't I? And I have my friends as well.
"I am a biiju. A kitsune god. I am not able to form the sort of bond needed. A kitsune needs a family of its own, friends that are as close as siblings, and physical attention. And you're human friends do not count in the least. They ignore you, neglect you, and take advantage of your kindness. I may not care for attachments, but I know that yours are not healthy for you. You NEED to leave kit, for your sanity."
Naruto sighed and looked out of his window at Konoha. It was almost time to meet at the bridge.
Sometimes I wish I could. But, my friends do care for me, and they are there for me. They may not see my pain, but I've never let them see it. I won't burden them with my problems.
"Heh. Lies kit. Lies you tell so well. You know they don't care, and are afraid to face that. Afraid to see them turn away. Would you feel that way if you knew they would always be there for you? No. I will give them a week to prove themselves of their loyalty to you. You WILL show them your true feelings, and when they show lack of caring, you WILL leave. I don't care how you leave, but you will."
Naruto tried to articulate an excuse, but the points were sadly, all true. And one could not argue easily with an ancient demon.
I may not agree, but I will do what you ask. I trust my friends and I know that at least one of them will meet your standards.
Naruto felt the Kyuubi's satisfaction and gathered his training equipment. For the first time, he did not put his smile on.
Lets see if they notice.
As he approached the bridge, he received strange looks from the villagers used to his boisterous attitude, but the looks soon changed to their usual state of loathing.
"The villagers noticed, so certainly my friend will." he mumbled under his breath.
Naruto soon heard Sakura's wails of both of his and Kakashi-sensei's tardiness. As he appeared in front of his teammates, Sakura's rage was all directed at him.
"Naruto-baka! Why the hell are you late! Worthless Idiot! Are you so stupid that you cannot even wake up on time!" Naruto fixed her with a flat look and stared at her.
"I am sorry Sakura. It won't happen again." Both Sasuke and Sakura gave him a confused glance, but Sakura soon returned to her ranting, and Sasuke just snorted derisively and returned to staring out at nothing.
After Naruto had returned Sasuke from the Valley of the End, Sasuke had been completely dismissive of Naruto. He wasn't cruel per say, but he just seemed a bit anxious around him.
He probably just cant stand to be around me after I released Kyuubi on him. He hates me as much as the villagers do.
Sakura's fan-girling tendencies had died down a bit after the almost betrayal, but she still used Naruto as a punching bag, and put Sasuke up on a pedestal.
When Sakura had finally gotten frustrated with Naruto ignoring her, and not his usual loud agreements, she once again raged at him.
"Idiot, why are you depressed looking. Stop ignoring me and get over yourself! You have no reason to act this way. You're probably trying to get my attention aren't you! You're just a selfish, stupid fool!"
As Sakura continued her rant, Naruto felt a mix of Kyuubi's and his own demonic chakra start to emerge again, bringing along with it his insanity.
"Hehehehehe!" he laughed crazily "Sakura, Sakura, Sakura. Is your forehead so big, that it creates a need for your ego to be so large as well?" He raised up his hand and poked her forehead with a single sharpened claw. "Perhaps I should carve it down to size, ne? I would enjoy that you know. Shredding your pretty little, self-absorbed head into tiny little pieces." As the insanity increased, and Naruto's eyes, began to bleed red, he turned from a terrified Sakura, to an interested Sasuke.
"Oh! My little avenging Uchiha, do you want my attention as well? Perhaps you wish for my claws to carve your ego down to size as well? Or, no. Perhaps you just want me to carve her up. Remove an annoyance for you? You do seem fond of knocking off your teammates."
He thought he saw a flash of pain rush through Sasuke's eyes, but it was soon replaced with anger.
"What's wrong with you Usuratonkatchi? Has your incompetence finally made you lose it?"
Naruto's face soon became stormy with rage, and a light purple haze surrounded him. This time purely his own demonic chakra.
"Silly, foolish little Sasuke. So wrapped up in your own arrogance that you do not see the strength of others. Perhaps I should remove your innards, and show you your own incompetence. I do so crave a good bloodshed."
Before Naruto could dive at Sasuke, his leg was grabbed and he was thrown into a tree. Standing in front of Sasuke was Kakashi, visible eye in fury.
"Naruto, I know you're rash, but you should know better than using that. Jiraiya-sama should have never taught you how to access it. He would be ashamed to see you using it like this."
Kakashi turned to a petrified Sakura and a confused Sasuke and blocked them from approaching Naruto.
"Don't go near him for a while. He is dangerous and unpredictable like this. Now go and train. I will return shortly."
While Kakashi was making sure his other two students were out of the area, Naruto tried to recall his demonic chakra and quell the insanity it always brought.
Kyuubi! Why do I always lose it when my demonic chakra appears?
"Kit, kitsunes go insane when their needs for companionship aren't being met. And since you're a half-demon, and since you have both your human and demon chakra, the demonic side is more controlled by your new kitsune instincts. Which is another reason I want you to leave. I need to teach you how to control your new chakra and how to fight like a kitsune.
So what your saying is that my demonic chakra and kitsune side, don't recognize my friends as the companions I need? And that I have to go over chakra control again?
"Yes."
Naruto was shaken out of his conversation by Kakashi.
"I thought you were taught to control that monster Naruto. Is your chakra control so inadequate that you still can't hold back the slightest bit it? Since that seems to be the case, I don't have time to train you. Go work on chakra control. Until your decent at it, I won't be able to teach you anything."
As Kakashi turned to walk away, the 16 year old looked at him in shock! But before Naruto could try and explain what was happening, and why he lost control, he heard something Kakashi muttered under his breath.
"Thank Kami I finally got that nuisance out of my hair." Naruto, for the second time that day, smiled bitterly.
"I haven't laughed or smiled once, I haven't said anything stupid, I tried to let them see how tired of it all I was, and I barely got anything out. And they think the absolute worst when I don't have perfect control. It seems that I don't have any real friends here."
"It seems that these three have failed."
Naruto's eyes widened in surprise.
"But didn't you say that they had a week?" He heard the Kyuubi chuckle.
"Silly kit. Think of how they have treated you over the years. If they ever really cared about you, they haven't shown it. I doubt that they will be able to appreciate you in a week."
Naruto sighed and nodded his head. I suppose you are right. But I still have other friends.
"Yes, yes, I know. Now even though we cannot train in demonic arts in Konoha, I can still teach you more of our kind. Now go to your apartment. I have something…shocking to tell you."
Naruto stood up and shook his head. "Why do I have a feeling that I am going to regret this?" Naruto received no answer, but heard a devious chuckle from Kyuubi.
Even though Naruto dreaded what he was about to learn, he obliged to the Kyuubi's request and made his way towards his apartment. But before he could get there, Kiba appeared and called out to him.
"Oi Naruto! Wait up a minute!" Naruto stopped and turned to meet Kiba. He waited for Kiba to catch his breath, and smiled tiredly, yet politely.
"Hello Kiba. How are you?" Kiba brushed him off and pushed him into an alley way.
"Never mind that idiot. I didn't come to just talk to you." Kiba's words stung a bit, but then again, Kiba always was a little rude and brash.
"Listen up fox-face, you gotta do something for me." Naruto sighed irritably.
"If you want me to do something, perhaps you should call me by my name, and perhaps ask how I was doing." Kiba stared at him blankly and then burst out laughing.
"Very funny dude. Its never bothered you before, so why should it now. Stop acting like a prick and help me out." Naruto sighed but began to relent anyways.
Like Kiba could notice anything anyways. People call me dense. Might as well give him a hand.
"Okay Kiba," Naruto sighed, "What do you want?" Kiba's eyes looked around, searching for someone listening in, and pulled Naruto close.
"Okay, here's the deal. Hinata likes you and is planning on asking you out. Akamaru is stalling her, but she's surprisingly determined this time. So what I want you to do is turn her down, not too harsh, but enough for her to get the idea that you aren't interested and allow me to catch her on the rebound and make her mine."
Naruto stared at Kiba, mouth gaping.
"Since when has Hinata liked me?" Both Kiba and Kyuubi sighed and rolled their eyes.
"Such a dense kit for as smart as he can be."
"Never mind that, just do as I ask!" Kiba ground out. Naruto took a moment to ponder what was happening, and an idea struck him.
"But what if I happened to like Hinata. What if you just told me what I had been waiting to hear. And isn't catching her on the rebound just like taking advantage of her?"
Kiba growled exasperatedly.
"Look moron. If you actually liked Hinata, you would have either asked her out by now, or you would let me be happy and care about your buddy's love life. You like Sakura anyways. AND, who cares if I take advantage of her. I'm not gunna do anything nasty to her, I like her a lot!"
Naruto was having a hard time. While he didn't want Hinata taken advantage of, but he really didn't like her anyways.
He knows how much I care for my friends, yet here he is asking me to deceive one. Even if I don't like her, it still feels wrong.
"Please man! I really like her!" Kiba begged.
Naruto's deep-seated desire and need to be important to his friends made the decision.
"Fine." Naruto sighed at last, "But go somewhere and hide. I don't exactly want you to hear everything said. I'm not giving you anything that could be used as blackmail."
Kiba gave his wolfish grin, and slammed his hand into Naruto's back, as a well meaning pat. It was unfortunately, too hard. As Kiba leaped onto the roof, Naruto grumbled curses under his breath.
It was a good thing that Kiba left when he did though, because Hinata appeared at the entrance of the alley, and spotted him.
"O-oh, N-n-Naruto-kun." she stuttered out, with cherry red cheeks, "I-I have s-something to a-ask y-you." Naruto gave her a gentle smile, and nodded his head.
"Go ahead Hinata-chan." She blushed once again, and lowered he head. She then braced her shoulders and lifted her head proudly.
"I-I was wondering I-if you would go on a d-date with me." Naruto closed his eyes and sighed sadly.
"I'm sorry Hinata-chan, I can't." As tears started to fill her eyes, Naruto panicked and grabbed her shoulders before she could run off.
"Wait Hinata-chan, I need to explain why." She looked unsure for a moment, not wanting to know why he had rejected her, but nodded her head anyways.
"Its not that I don't like you, because you are one of my most trusted friends, but…well…this is something that you can't tell anyone. Okay?" Hinata, still unsure about the whole thing, slowly nodded.
"Well, you see, ever since ero-sennin…enlightened…me about this on my trip, when I had shown nothing but disgust for the hooker he tried to set me up with, and then had to bash it into my head to get me to accept this, well, you see, Hinata…I'm gay."
Hinata's brain seemed to short circuit, and had Kiba not have been listening in to see where it was headed, she would of fainted on the spot. But before she could, Kiba leaped down and pulled her away.
Kiba face was a mix of rage and disgust.
"You…you freak! You're gay! That's completely disgusting! I don't want you anywhere me or Hinata. Get out of here queer, before I mess you up!"
Naruto stood there as Kiba dragged Hinata out, completely surprised. (That seemed to be happening a lot today) He knew Kiba, with his brash attitude, would take it hard, but he never expected that response. Did…did he just lose a friend?
"They didn't pass either kit. And yes based on his reaction, it will be hard for you two to ever have a close friendship again. But that may be a good thing. He only used you for his own benefits."
Perhaps your right, but they still have a week to prove themselves, and I haven't given up yet. And Kyuubi? He asked tentatively, Can…can I go see Baa-chan instead of lessons? I want some form of comfort, and, well, you aren't the best at that.
"Sigh. Very well kit. But we will NOT skip tomorrow. Now go to your baa-chan and seek the 'comfort' your human side so desires." Naruto smiled to himself and laid a hand on his stomach.
Thanks Kyuubi.
Naruto heard no response, but when his stomach warmed, he knew he had been heard.
First, Naruto had went to the Hokage tower to see if Baa-chan could see him. But the secretary at the desk had only glared at him. After a couple minutes of badgering her, she snapped and said that Tsunade was at the hospital, doing rounds.
Naruto thanked her with a cheeky smile, and left.
Messing with secretaries never gets old.
"I must admit, it is a bit humorous."
On the way to the hospital, he suddenly remembered something.
"Man." he said to himself, "I haven't seen Neji, Tenten, or Bushybrows for two weeks. I hope I haven't been ignoring them."
Hey Kyuubi! Have you noticed their chakra signatures around anywhere?
"No I haven't kit. Don't you remember? They have been on a mission. They told you before you left. Although you shouldn't worry about ignoring people. If they want to talk to you they will. You care far too much about keeping them happy."
I can't help that Kyuubi. I already feel like some of my precious people are slipping away, and since I was alone for most of my life, I don't want it to happen again. I don't want to lose them.
"But what happens when they don't care? What happens when you can't survive with their callous disregard of your feelings?"
Well, I guess we will find out sometime this week.
As his mind fell silent, Naruto slowly continued his way to the hospital, receiving glares the whole way there.
Even as he entered the hospital, the glares didn't recede. He received them from the nurses, doctors, and patients.
No matter what I do, no matter how much blood I spill, how many wounds I receive, Konoha will still see me as a demon.
"Well kit, you are a demon now."
…oh yeah. Well you know what I mean. A symbol of death and destruction. I can never be just a ninja here.
"Which is why you should leave. Perhaps we should raze the village a bit before then?"
No. No village destruction. You know? You never told me why you attacked.
"Really? Well, I was just passing through the area, and happened to…accidentally smash a couple of ninja. Then they started attacking me, and things just spiraled out of control. But you would think the ninjas would see me coming. I wasn't even running. But it was fun while it lasted."
So my life was ruined because of an accident.
"Yeah."
…
"…"
…Lets not linger on that. What were we talking about earlier?
"You know what? I forgot."
How the hell did that happen?
"Sometimes, shit happens."
Tru dat.
Naruto and Kyuubi were silent for a moment and then broke out into laughter. But the laughter was cut off when Naruto, not paying attention to where he was going, ran into Ino.
"What the hell baka?" She screeched, "Watch where you're going!" Naruto picked himself off the floor from where he and Ino had fallen in the collision. When he held a hand out to help her up, she slapped it away and glared at him.
"Don't touch me. Just don't run in to me again."
"Naruto, you troublesome fool, what are you doing?" Naruto looked to his left, and saw Shikamaru slouching with a bored look on his face. Naruto's face brightened and he gave them a smile.
"Hey guys, what are you doing here?"
Both Ino and Shikamaru sighed.
"Troublesome." Shikamaru muttered "Chouji overate at Yakiniku-Q, gave himself a stomach ache, and had to be admitted. The same reason we are always here." Naruto gave them a nervous smile.
"Well, do you mind if I visit him and wish him well?" Ino rolled her eyes and huffed, while Shikamaru sighed.
"Listen, Naruto," Shikamaru began, "I don't think it's a good time. Chouji might like some peace and quiet, and you, are just loud and annoying. He would get no rest with you in there."
Naruto's smile faded, and a small frown took its place.
"I-I won't say a word. I just want to be there for my friends."
This time, both Shikamaru and Ino rolled their eyes.
"Yeah right Naruto." Ino said haughtily "There is no way we can trust you to stay silent. You are completely incapable of that." They left Naruto standing there, anger and sadness filling his heart.
I…I never go back on my word. They all know that. And what have I ever done to betray their trust. And being loud is the only way to make the silence go away.
"And all oppressing silence is your greatest fear, yes?"
Yeah…
"It seems more have fallen."
You are judging them rather quickly. Don't you think?
"No." Kyuubi said harshly, "You want so badly to think that you have close enough companions to satisfy your demonic need, that you will accept their slights against you. But I am taking in the way they have always treated you. They never even noticed you until you were strong enough to satisfy their wants. And even still, they only come to you when they need something that no other normal human can do. Either that, or they see you as a way to hold on to dead loved ones. Like Tsunade with her dead lover and brother, and Jiraiya with the Yondaime, they like you because you remind them of you. And where were they for the beginning of your life? Where were they when you were being beaten and neglected as a child? Not even the demons that are so despised would even abandoned one of their own."
You feel very strongly towards me leaving, don't you?
"Yes. You are my kin now. And only a kit by our standards. You NEED a stable companion, and I will not let you suffer more than needed."
Naruto sniffled back tears Thanks. Its strange that the only one who cares this much for me is the one who almost destroyed this place.
"Yeah, yeah. Don't go getting all mushy. Now go see your baa-Chan. 'Lets see if she can pass."
Naruto, his spirits lifted a bit, made his was to Tsunade's office.
Even before she entered the room, she could hear Tsunade yelling about something.
Naruto cautiously opened the door, and peeked his head inside. He saw Tsunade sitting at her desk, a bottle of sake in her hands, yelling at a medic for a mistake made earlier that day.
Naruto went back out, and waited until the medic came out.
I think she is always drunk
He opened the door once again, and entered the room.
"Tsunade Baa-chan?" She glared up from the bottle she was drinking out of.
"What do you want brat?" she asked harshly
He gulped. She was never this harsh to him.
"I need to talk to you about something important. Its…"
"What?" she asked, cutting him off, "Are you here to complain about how unfairly everyone treats you? Or are you here to brag about your 'amazingness' and demand missions from me? Or, or, are you here to just bug me. Because that's all I ever seem to hear for you."
"Baa-chan!" he exclaimed, hurt, "Its nothing like that! Why does everyone always assume I have something to complain about?"
"Because that's all you do!" she yelled, "You act like you're the only one with problems. No one else ever has a hard time. As far as I can see, you have it pretty easy. You don't have any responsibilities at all!"
The demonic chakra began to surge under the surface.
No responsibilities? What do you think the seal on my stomach is?
"What the hell is wrong with you! I come in to talk about something serious and you bite my head off! If you don't hear what I'm trying to tell you, you'll regret it!"
"Well excuse me brat!" She yelled, standing up, "I lost a patient today because of a medic's stupidity. And your definition of important is very loose!"
So one thing goes wrong in her day, and all of a sudden no one else is important?
"Baa-chan! Please listen!" he begged "I need you right now! I don't need missions, I have no need to brag, I just, I just want you!"
"I don't care! I don't have time for you!
I don't care, I don't care, I don't care, I don't care… her words echoed through his head, bringing forth all of his sadness and anger.
You were right Kyuubi. They don't care. With those thoughts, Naruto retreated into his subconscious, and allowed the Kyuubi to handle his problems for him.
I need you now Kyuubi. I need you to fix it. Make it better.
"Of course kit."
With Naruto's empty eyes, and silent presence, Tsunade calmed from her rage. She sighed, sat down, and rubbed her face wearily.
"Forget it brat. I didn't mean that. Now what do you need."
"Nothing from you hag." a harsh, un-Naruto like voice answered her. She looked up and gasped. Naruto's eyes were blood red, and his features feral.
"K-Kyuubi! What's going on here?" He responded with a malicious chuckle
"So now you care what's wrong with the kit? I thought you didn't. I thought you didn't have time for him."
"Well the breaking of the seal is very important!" she responded, "And I admit. I was a bit harsh."
"A bit? One of his greatest fears is that his precious people will stop caring. And the problem he was going to discuss with you was the seal. Bu now because of your drunken callousness, I will explain."
Tsunade opened her mouth to speak, but was snapped close when the Kyuubi growled darkly at her.
"Shut up. You will listen and speak when input is necessary. Now, I cannot take over without Naruto's permission, so the seal is not broken. But there is something the kit wants you to know. I would rather just leave and not tell you, but I will abide by his wishes. Naruto is now half-kitsune." Tsunade once again tried to speak, but the Kyuubi cut her off.
"Don't speak. I will explain. Everything that has happened over the years. The seal was originally designed to keep me completely locked away, never waking, never lending my chakra to the kit. But what your Hokage didn't know was that strong rage called to demonic chakra. At the bridge at Wave, when Naruto thought Sasuke had been killed, his rage reached a level that called forth my chakra and woke me. Such an impressive anger for one so young" the Kyuubi sighed proudly,
"Well, once I awoke, the seal modified itself to handle the changes occurring. It began to meld us together. It cannot merge us completely, nor drastically change it, because of the enforcement from the Shinigami, but it did enough to make Naruto half-kitsune.
Now because of this, he has gained some Kitsune instincts. One being the need for close companions, lest madness take over his mind. Part of the reason he came to see you was to see if his kitsune instincts would recognize you as kin enough. And you failed. Everyone we have seen today has failed. As such I am taking him before he goes insane."
Tsunade jumped up at this.
"You can't take him! He belong here!" she yelled.
"YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND!" The Kyuubi roared, "If he does not get away from here, find a close companion, and learn to control his demonic chakra, he will go insane and kill everyone. He has already lost himself twice today. Now, I am leaving and taking him with me. I will save his mind. Send anyone after us, and I will destroy them. We will return in five years."
And with that, the Kyuubi and Naruto disappeared in a swirl of red chakra.
CKH: Sorry If its confusing. If anything isn't clear, it will be cleared up next chapter.
Review and either your choice of Itachi, Naruto, or Gaara, will find you and do dirty things to you
Itachi, Naruto, and Garra: Review please (Smirk/cute smile/Smirk) (Who's out of place?)