It was a bright day down in Bikini Bottom. Scallops chirped and jellyfish buzzed. The green algae lay there moving about as footsteps crossed through. It was that wierd Spongebob guy, overwhelmed with delight at what the day may bring. He sniffed the air and smiled.
"Gee, just THINK of the fun I can have today with my pals"
Just then, the pink, fat starfish Patrick popped out of the sand with a dish full of assorted items.
"Hey, Spongebob! Look what I found!" He showed Sponge what he had - drugs. Of all kinds. Blunts, bongs, meth, cigarettes, tabacco gum, and all sorts of PCPs, LSDs, and shrooms. "It's from Squid's house. He calls it his 'relief'." Pat then beamed. "YOU HAVE TO TRY SOME"
Spongebob took some ectasty and put it in his mouth.
"Mmm...tasty"
He then stared into space, before a HUGE wave of fuckedupness took over. Then, he went totally crazy. So did Patrick. They began to smoke, cew on blutns, and basically fumble around doing all kinds of drugs in all kinds of ways.
Eventually, they got to Sandy's treedome. Sandy looked as if Patrick had introduced the drugs to her, swaggering towards the yellow cube and handing him an acorn full of liquid.
"Hey, Sandy," said Spongebob. "What's this shit?"
Sandy's right eye popped open and she laughed. "Some hard-ass freakin vodka! Texas style"
Immediately, Spongebob took a hose of the vodka and poured it into Pat's gaping mouth, making him VERY drunk.
Later, at the Krusty Krab, Sponge stared out into space, when.
"Hey, Spongebob!" called Squidward. "Quit laughing at the table and start making Krabby Patties. And get some eyewash, or else the health inspector will boot us and I won't get my salery"
Spongebob stumbled to the back and began. First, he vomited some bread he had eaten, making nasty goo on it spread. Then, he took some raw patties, shit on them, and put them on the bread before smashing toppings and condaments around the room. He then looked at his prize - some VERY nasty burgers. Sponge then stumbled to the customer, but slipped and threw the patty away.
"Whoops! Let me do it again"
He then fucked up nonstop, pouring tequilla on one burger, pissing on another, stomping on a thrid, and sticking cannabis in a fourth. A dozen fucked up Patties appeared, and the customers retched and began to leave at what was there. This made the cheap owner, Mr. Krabs, angry.
"Spongebob, what's the meaning of this mess? Get the anchors out of your pants and quit goofing off"
"Well...well..why don't you just go and FUCK OFF"
Krabs did not expect this and was in shock. "WHAAT? Do my ears decive me!" Spongebob then ran to the door, but kept bumping into it from the drugs. Krabs then grabbed him with his right claw and turned him back.
"What's the meaning of this?" he asked again.
"Mr. Krabs... I... I"
"Morons," said Squidward.
"WWAAAHHH!" cried Spongebob.
"No, no, boy, don't cry. Why not take the rest of the day off?" Spongebob felt good. Mr. Krabs then let him stand. "Nothing to see here, Folks!" That's when Sponge tipped over frm a relapse. But he'd survive...