For sarahhjanesmith. Bill and Laura belong to Ron Moore; title belongs to Taylor Swift and the Civil Wars.
Chapter One
Cottle lit a cigarette. "So who's the lucky guy?"
Laura dropped her head in her hands and moaned.
"I was never around for Zak and Lee," Bill said, his voice a deep rumble in Laura's ear. "I wasn't the father I should have been. I regret that."
She snuggled closer to him on the sandbags—it was getting chilly, after all, she told herself. She watched Bill exhale a plume of smoke above them before holding the cigarette out to her. She took it, the darkness making their hands clumsy…unless it was something else that made their fingers brush.
"What about you?" he prompted. "Regrets?"
She wasn't sure which one of them had brought it up…at this point, everything was a little hazy. Regrets, Laura mused…
"I would have liked to have been a mother," she said, surprising herself with her candor. Laura couldn't remember the last time she'd let herself even think about it, much less mention it out loud.
"Why didn't you?" Bill asked. "Have children, I mean."
"I like unavailable men," she said, her tone very dry.
Bill snorted.
"Really," he added, his voice growing serious. "I'd like to know."
She shrugged, exhaling with meditative slowness. "After my father and my sisters died…I just couldn't imagine ever risking that again," she said finally. "That kind of loss…I didn't think I could survive it."
"It's a good thing you held out and waited for the destruction of mankind," Bill said sardonically.
Laura laughed. "You can't win them all," she said, choosing to be philosophical.
Bill's lips brushed the top of her head. "Is it too late?" he asked delicately.
"Oh…for me?" she asked, distracted by the feel of his mouth in her hair. "No. Not technically. But it might as well be. What am I going to do, have a baby now?"
"Why not?" Bill asked.
Laura put out the cigarette. "I think you've had enough."
""I'm perfectly serious," Bill insisted. "'Live the life that we've got while we've got it,' right? If you want to have a child, you should just go ahead and do it."
Laura giggled. "What, spontaneously?"
"I'll have a baby with you," Bill said, his tone easy, nonchalant, as though they were discussing her dinner plans.
"That's not exactly what I meant when I said we should start having babies," Laura pointed out, snuggling closer to Bill, her lips just brushing his neck.
"Well, we can't let you have a child with just anyone," he said. "Besides…" He shifted on the sandbags, one arm wrapping around her waist and pulling her closer, one hand brushing lazily through her hair. "If you're going to be down here in your cabin, what's going to be the fun of staying up in space?"
Laura let herself imagine it: her cabin in the mountains, Bill beside her, their baby in her arms.
She wondered if their child would have his blue eyes.
"I'm not having a baby in a tent," she said out loud.
"Of course not," Bill grinned. "I'm going to build you that cabin, remember?"
"But…"
But she'd almost died, should have died. Should have died during the attacks, should have died of her cancer, should have died a thousand times in between.
"It might not happen right away," she said instead.
"It's true, we would probably have to practice a lot," Bill deadpanned.
She became aware of his hand grazing her hip, ever so gently.
Slowly, Laura smiled. "I suppose I could live with that," she said.
"I'll make you a deal," he said, his lips brushing hers. "You have the baby, and I'll build the cabin."
"You're at about eight weeks," Cottle continued.
They hadn't seen each other in weeks when Bill showed up at the school, just before class was letting out for the day.
Bill kept a straight face in front of Maya. "Can you manage this?" he asked seriously. "Ms. Roslin and I have an important project to work on."
Later, curled up in her tent, Bill showed her the plans he'd drawn for their cabin.
"Bill," Laura said, giving voice to the thought that had been nagging at her in the months since Founder's Day, "if this doesn't—if I don't—"
He kissed her forehead. "Then I'll have you all to myself," he whispered.
"Which puts the timing…."
"Just two more weeks," Bill promised, packing up his things to return to Galactica, one last time. "Two more weeks, to get Lee and Helo settled into command, and then I'll be back here for good."
"I probably won't even notice you're gone," Laura teased.
The Cylons came the next day.
"Right before the Cylons arrived," Laura mumbled in response. She raised her head. "Now what am I going to do?"
"Take your vitamins and try to behave yourself," Cottle advised. "When the Admiral comes back, I don't want him kicking my ass."