Summary: According to Chekov, all good things were invented in Russia...or were they? Takes place right before the Nerada incident, humor and mentions of slash.

Rated: ...Good question...k+?

Just something cute I thought of while making chocolate chip pancakes and decided to write up quickly before my family got home. Hope you like!

1

"Hey, Russian Wizkid, can you take a picture for me?" The communications officer in red asked Chekov. He was a bit peeves to be addressed without the man asking his name, but he took the camera and held it up as the man stood for a pose.

"First day on ze job?" Chekov asked. The man looked like an over-excited ten-year-old boy about to wet his pants. He nodded his head vigorously and Chekov was reminded of the bobble-head collect he had at home.

"Ya! Oh, I can't wait for my brothers to see this! They'll be so jealous! Hey, do you know how to use it?"

Chekov cocked his head to the side in surprise. Did he know how to use a camera? Who didn't?

"Da, of course I know how to use it."

"Oh, didn't mean to offend, just, you know, some people don't know how to use that model-"

"It was inwented in Russia. I know how to use it." He snapped the photo immediately, resulting in a picture of the man with his mouth hanging open like a guppy. He handed the camera back with a smile, a sharp nod, and headed for the bridge.

2

"Ensign Chekov, if I could have a word, please." Commander Spock pulled Chekov to the side while cadets raced to their stations.

"Yes, Commander?"

"The Ensign authorization code has been changed and Captain pike wished me to convey the new code to you before we set off. '9-5-Victor-Victor-2'. Understood?"

"Da."

"And you will be able to remember it, correct?" Chekov rolled his green eyes and turned away, calling over his shoulders to the commander.

"Russians inwented memory, I'll be fine."

3

"Ah, get back here!" Doctor McCoy beckoned Chekov to him as soon as the young Ensign came into sight. He sighed and followed the good doctor into Medbay and watched calmly as the doctor pulled out a hypo spray.

"You know all new members need to receive this vaccine before going out into space. Now, this may sting a bit-"

"Russians inwented ze hypo spray, I am not afraid of it." McCoy gave the boy a weird look for a few seconds before deciding that it wasn't worth arguing over. He stabbed the hypo spray into his neck and watched as Chekov yelped from the pain, covering the new wound with his hand.

"Did Russians invent pain, too?" He asked as he wiped the small dot of blood off the boy's neck.

"No, zey only inwent good things."

"I bet," McCoy said with a roll of his eyes.

4

The day had barely started and already Chekov wanted to go home. At least at the Academy everyone was young; on this ship he was surrounded by people in their thirties who treated him like a child. Nobody took him seriously.

"Russian Wizkid, what's your name?" Chekov cringed as the Captain used that stupid nickname for him. After correcting the captain (perhaps a little more than necessary) he entered the correct code, delivered a basic message, and sat back in his chair, bored once more.

"Hey, nice accent." Chekov turned to face the man sitting next to him, the one who had made the first mistake of the night. He was about to reply when his breath caught in his throat. The man, Sulu, he recalled, must have been at least ten years older then he was, but his smile was bright and friendly and he was looking at Chekov like he considered him an equal, rather than a child.

Chekov felt a blush cover his cheeks as he stared into the dark brown eyes of his crew member.

"T-thanks, it was inwented by Russia." The man laughed. At that moment Captain Pike called Sulu to attention. Chekov faced his station once more, releasing a shaky breath. As he shot sideways glances at Sulu for the rest of the night, there was only one thought on his mind regarding the beautiful man.

Russian didn't invent that.

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